Hear What A Mother Told Her Daughter On Her Wedding Day - Family (7)

Hear What A Mother Told Her Daughter On Her Wedding Day - Family (7) - Nairaland

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Re: Hear What A Mother Told Her Daughter On Her Wedding Day by Rayjaymay(m): 7:41am On Sep 20, 2015

raayah:
Very Very bad Advice!

Look, my own mother suffered abuse in the hands of her husband after doing heaven and earth for him. You know what my mother told me one day? She sat me down and said, "Raayah. My husband does not love me, If he did, he will not abuse me like this for no reason".

Weeks after that, She moved out and hasn't looked back. She is planning to return the dowry to his people very soon. Life is so much better for her. No more spending nights at the hospital,(Yes, that's how serious the physical and mental abuse was), no more tears.. Life is good!

If you choose to stay with an abusive man because of the "children" or because you cannot "live independently", then say so. Don't tell women to stay with men with abusive men..
Same advice for men, don't stay with abusive women. They can kill

She dared him by doing what? How many of you will fight an agbero who dares you, or a man who disrespects you, Not a lot!
But when it comes to your wife, she does something wrong, you decide to give her head injury!
All of you justifying this abuse are cowards, yes I said it!

did u knw the defn of dare she is saying in the context....

1 Like

Re: Hear What A Mother Told Her Daughter On Her Wedding Day by Justcul(m): 10:05am On Sep 20, 2015

Amustical:
HEAR WHAT A MOTHER TOLD HER DAUGHTER ON
HER WEDDING DAY
.
My daughter,you are now a wife and soon you'll
be become a mother too. God bear me witness
that I taught you how to cook and do other house
chores. I taught you to respect men and to
explain your anger when necessary but if you do
otherwise,i know you,not as a daughter but as my
fellow woman.
My daughter,you see this your husband? He is a
gentleman but don't take advantage of that. Don't
bring out the beast in him. My daughter,you see
this mark on my forehead?
Your father gave it to me.He tolerated me
everytime but on that day,He came unexpectedly.
It wasn't his intention but i dared him and he hit
me just once
My daughter,Men hate it when you use the word
"YOU CAN'T DO IT".He sure can do more than but
he's just protecting you from harm.
My daughter, whenever there is an arguement or
misunderstanding, try drinking water.You can't
talk when you have water in your mouth.
Now,you have two families.You are very
lucky.Tolerate and appreciate them just as you
did here.
Learn to welcome other people's kids and soon,
children will sorround your table with love.
You see that my big pot? I bought it when i still
had no child but i always cooked with it to feed
those children who had nothing to eat.
Learn to show hospitality. Welcome a visitor and
at least,offer a glass of water.Don't discriminate.
Don't shatter your husband's family. instead,
bring them together.
Learn to appreciate little efforts and soon,they'll
learn to do more.
Today,you are wearing a wedding gown and you
look so beautiful in it but there is still another
gown you need to wear.That is the MATERNITY
gown. I wore it and you shall wear your's too.
When you have a misundertanding, don't come
back here.Sort things out and build a happy
home.I built mine and your father enjoyed me.
Men like food.They like both the kITCHEN food
and the BEDROOM food.Don't deny him any of
the food all because you had an arguement.
If the ones i taught you are not enough, learn
more!

apt

Re: Hear What A Mother Told Her Daughter On Her Wedding Day by linusbnn(m): 10:11am On Sep 20, 2015

raayah:
why didn't my husband forgive me instead of injuring me.. is it only women that should forgive

If you love him,you will not count how many times you have forgiven him,rather pray God to help him realise his mistakes. Marriage is a union of two diff entities and belief,so ENDURANCE is the key coupled with prayers. Family dat pray together,stay together,and that duty lies largely on the part of the woman.

Re: Hear What A Mother Told Her Daughter On Her Wedding Day by Nobody: 1:02pm On Sep 20, 2015*

raayah:
Very Very bad Advice!

Look, my own mother suffered abuse in the hands of her husband after doing heaven and earth for him. You know what my mother told me one day? She sat me down and said, "Raayah. My husband does not love me, If he did, he will not abuse me like this for no reason".

Weeks after that, She moved out and hasn't looked back. She is planning to return the dowry to his people very soon. Life is so much better for her. No more spending nights at the hospital,(Yes, that's how serious the physical and mental abuse was), no more tears.. Life is good!

If you choose to stay with an abusive man because of the "children" or because you cannot "live independently", then say so. Don't tell women to stay with men with abusive men..
Same advice for men, don't stay with abusive women. They can kill

She dared him by doing what? How many of you will fight an agbero who dares you, or a man who disrespects you, Not a lot!
But when it comes to your wife, she does something wrong, you decide to give her head injury!
All of you justifying this abuse are cowards, yes I said it!

You have succeeded in saying nothing relevant.

Let's start from where she tells her daughter that her husband is a gentleman, which cannot be said about your mother's husband.

She then goes on to advise her daughter to not take advantage of the gentleness of her groom. Do you think this is bad advise?

The mother then adds, the daughter should not bring out the beast in her husband. Another bad advise?

Whether your mother wants to pay back her dowry with interest is not the concern of this thread. Our concern here is that women should handle their men appropriately. Your mother made a bad choice in husband. Deal with it, it's not the OP's fault and certainly doesn't invalidate the advice in the OP.

Stop projecting your misery on the world.

3 Likes

Re: Hear What A Mother Told Her Daughter On Her Wedding Day by Nobody: 1:13pm On Sep 20, 2015

Instead of beating a disrespectful wife, you can just divorce her. Saves you your self-respect in a lot of spheres.

Re: Hear What A Mother Told Her Daughter On Her Wedding Day by refreshrate: 1:19pm On Sep 20, 2015

Joy1706:
My own mum taught me that if my husband for any sick reason lays his hands on me, I'm well within my rights to get his azz arrested. That's one advice I'd be keeping in mind not this BS

what was that saying again?

...we attract what we think? *thumbs up*

1 Like

Re: Hear What A Mother Told Her Daughter On Her Wedding Day by Ijaya123: 1:27pm On Sep 20, 2015

With ladies of nowadays, may God open their ears and hearts to hear and assimilate.

Re: Hear What A Mother Told Her Daughter On Her Wedding Day by Nobody: 1:58pm On Sep 20, 2015

I read this thread from a-z hoping to see cococandy and freecocoa and their position on the OP. It went awkward as usual.

@raayah

When last did you see 2 men throwing verbal abuses at each other like women do? Men throw punches, that is their style.

When last did you see 2 women throwing punches at each other? Women abuse verbally, that is their style.

If you don't want your husband to use his style on you, don't use your style on him. After using your style on him, being the initiator, you have no right to tell him how to retaliate or what style to use in return.

If america fires a missile to russia and russia retaliates with a nuclear weapon, america has no right to whine about the method russia used in retaliating.

If you throw caution to the wind by verbally abusing your hubby, he'll also toe thesame line by physically abusing you. You brought war into your home the very moment you decided to shout like a crazed soldier, and in war all is fair.

Keep your mouth shut instead of nagging and daring your husband. Always think about the consequences of your actions before embarking on them.

#this post doesn't support abuses.

2 Likes

Re: Hear What A Mother Told Her Daughter On Her Wedding Day by raayah(f): 2:08pm On Sep 20, 2015

juicee1:
I read this thread from a-z hoping to see cococandy and freecocoa and their position on the OP. It went awkward as usual.

@raayah

When last did you see 2 men throwing verbal abuses at each other like women do? Men throw punches, that is their style.

When last did you see 2 women throwing punches at each other? Women abuse verbally, that is their style.

If you don't want your husband to use his style on you, don't use your style on him. After using your style on him, being the initiator, you have no right to tell him how to retaliate or what style to use in return.

If america fires a missile to russia and russia retaliates with a nuclear weapon, america has no right to whine about the method russia used in retaliating.

If you throw caution to the wind by verbally abusing your hubby, he'll also toe thesame line by physically abusing you. You brought war into your home the very moment you decided to shout like a crazed soldier, and in war all is fair.

Keep your mouth shut instead of nagging and daring your husband. Always think about the consequences of your actions before embarking on them.

#this post doesn't support abuses.

its very difficult for men to say that there were wrong. Is it right for a man to beat up his woman

Re: Hear What A Mother Told Her Daughter On Her Wedding Day by Nobody: 2:10pm On Sep 20, 2015

raayah:
its very difficult for men to say that there were wrong. Is it right for a man to beat up his woman

its very difficult for women to say that there were wrong. Is it right for a woman to verbally abuse her man?

1 Like

Re: Hear What A Mother Told Her Daughter On Her Wedding Day by raayah(f): 2:18pm On Sep 20, 2015

juicee1:
its very difficult for women to say that there were wrong. Is it right for a woman to verbally abuse her man?

The woman admitted her fault in this story huh

...

Re: Hear What A Mother Told Her Daughter On Her Wedding Day by Nobody: 2:33pm On Sep 20, 2015

raayah:
The woman admitted her fault in this story ...

if you know how to make your husband calm down, you'll never see his beastie side. But if you think you can match him fire for fire, then get ready to move from one man's roof to another.

Don't let your mum's situation make you see men as demons, cos it will make you maltreat even a gentleman who doesn't deserve such.

Re: Hear What A Mother Told Her Daughter On Her Wedding Day by Nobody: 2:51pm On Sep 20, 2015

This story is rabbitch..... /in sabr's voice/

You wanna know a Jewish Wedding song, I read it in a book:
Who asked you to be buried alive
No one forced you
You brought this madness upon yourself

Thats a wedding song o....

1 Like

Re: Hear What A Mother Told Her Daughter On Her Wedding Day by tammie24: 11:10pm On Sep 20, 2015

raayah:
Very Very bad Advice!

Look, my own mother suffered abuse in the hands of her husband after doing heaven and earth for him. You know what my mother told me one day? She sat me down and said, "Raayah. My husband does not love me, If he did, he will not abuse me like this for no reason".

Weeks after that, She moved out and hasn't looked back. She is planning to return the dowry to his people very soon. Life is so much better for her. No more spending nights at the hospital,(Yes, that's how serious the physical and mental abuse was), no more tears.. Life is good!

If you choose to stay with an abusive man because of the "children" or because you cannot "live independently", then say so. Don't tell women to stay with men with abusive men..
Same advice for men, don't stay with abusive women. They can kill

She dared him by doing what? How many of you will fight an agbero who dares you, or a man who disrespects you, Not a lot!
But when it comes to your wife, she does something wrong, you decide to give her head injury!
All of you justifying this abuse are cowards, yes I said it!

Thank you jare
Soon as I got to that point, I stopped reading
So if ur husband is an abuser you should tolerate him huh

One day he will kill you na
Their days are not like ours
So many mentally deranged men these days

Re: Hear What A Mother Told Her Daughter On Her Wedding Day by chinchum(m): 4:42am On Sep 21, 2015

raayah:
its very difficult for men to say that there were wrong. Is it right for a man to beat up his woman

it is wrong for a man to beat up a woman, but men are no heavenly angels, who knows he might shamefully snapped, and use his own strength. Women have greater verbal strength than men, and men have greater physical strength than women, at least on the average.
You talk about men not attacking agberos, but you forgot the ageros does not live under his roof, or they live together, if they do, then physical brawl will be common place.

If a lady is sensible enough, she should have spotted a potential physically abusive man,and not tie the knot with him, but if she misses out of that for one reason or the other, she must be able to manage the situation to avoid the physical brawls with her man.

Re: Hear What A Mother Told Her Daughter On Her Wedding Day by MeAndYou(m): 9:47am On Sep 21, 2015

What a great and lovely piece!

Re: Hear What A Mother Told Her Daughter On Her Wedding Day by Stillfire: 5:54pm On Sep 21, 2015

cococandy:
Stillfire
Raging fire.

Lmao. For all their good wifeism, I wonder why our women still remain one of the most abused along with a few other countries.

Don't bring out the beast in him indeed. If someone has a beast in them, do they need anyone to help them bring it out?

Apparently Nigerian wives aren't 'good' after all. They need a punch or two or thousands to keep them in line, lmao. Same way their fathers did taekwondo on their goat-like mothers.

Re: Hear What A Mother Told Her Daughter On Her Wedding Day by Sike(m): 6:49am On Sep 24, 2015

Amustical:
HEAR WHAT A MOTHER TOLD HER DAUGHTER ON HER WEDDING DAY . My daughter,you are now a wife and soon you'll be become a mother too. God bear me witness that I taught you how to cook and do other house chores. I taught you to respect men and to explain your anger when necessary but if you do otherwise,i know you,not as a daughter but as my fellow woman. My daughter,you see this your husband? He is a gentleman but don't take advantage of that. Don't bring out the beast in him. My daughter,you see this mark on my forehead? Your father gave it to me.He tolerated me everytime but on that day,He came unexpectedly. It wasn't his intention but i dared him and he hit me just once My daughter,Men hate it when you use the word "YOU CAN'T DO IT".He sure can do more than but he's just protecting you from harm. My daughter, whenever there is an arguement or misunderstanding, try drinking water.You can't talk when you have water in your mouth. Now,you have two families.You are very lucky.Tolerate and appreciate them just as you did here. Learn to welcome other people's kids and soon, children will sorround your table with love. You see that my big pot? I bought it when i still had no child but i always cooked with it to feed those children who had nothing to eat. Learn to show hospitality. Welcome a visitor and at least,offer a glass of water.Don't discriminate. Don't shatter your husband's family. instead, bring them together. Learn to appreciate little efforts and soon,they'll learn to do more. Today,you are wearing a wedding gown and you look so beautiful in it but there is still another gown you need to wear.That is the MATERNITY gown. I wore it and you shall wear your's too. When you have a misundertanding, don't come back here.Sort things out and build a happy home.I built mine and your father enjoyed me. Men like food.They like both the kITCHEN food and the BEDROOM food.Don't deny him any of the food all because you had an arguement. If the ones i taught you are not enough, learn more!

1 Like

Re: Hear What A Mother Told Her Daughter On Her Wedding Day by Amustical(op): 5:40pm On Sep 28, 2015

First time front page since I joined nairaland....
Apere oriire reeee ooooooooo...... Dedicated to my new bouncing baby boy that my bautiful and well trained wife just delivered to me. I love you die baby

1 Like

Re: Hear What A Mother Told Her Daughter On Her Wedding Day by psamuel618(m): 6:43pm On Sep 28, 2015

Amustical:
HEAR WHAT A MOTHER TOLD HER DAUGHTER ON HER WEDDING DAY . My daughter,you are now a wife and soon you'll be become a mother too. God bear me witness that I taught you how to cook and do other house chores. I taught you to respect men and to explain your anger when necessary but if you do otherwise,i know you,not as a daughter but as my fellow woman. My daughter,you see this your husband? He is a gentleman but don't take advantage of that. Don't bring out the beast in him. My daughter,you see this mark on my forehead? Your father gave it to me.He tolerated me everytime but on that day,He came unexpectedly. It wasn't his intention but i dared him and he hit me just once My daughter,Men hate it when you use the word "YOU CAN'T DO IT".He sure can do more than but he's just protecting you from harm. My daughter, whenever there is an arguement or misunderstanding, try drinking water.You can't talk when you have water in your mouth. Now,you have two families.You are very lucky.Tolerate and appreciate them just as you did here. Learn to welcome other people's kids and soon, children will sorround your table with love. You see that my big pot? I bought it when i still had no child but i always cooked with it to feed those children who had nothing to eat. Learn to show hospitality. Welcome a visitor and at least,offer a glass of water.Don't discriminate. Don't shatter your husband's family. instead, bring them together. Learn to appreciate little efforts and soon,they'll learn to do more. Today,you are wearing a wedding gown and you look so beautiful in it but there is still another gown you need to wear.That is the MATERNITY gown. I wore it and you shall wear your's too. When you have a misundertanding, don't come back here.Sort things out and build a happy home.I built mine and your father enjoyed me. Men like food.They like both the kITCHEN food and the BEDROOM food.Don't deny him any of the food all because you had an arguement. If the ones i taught you are not enough, learn more!

Truest of all words.

Re: Hear What A Mother Told Her Daughter On Her Wedding Day by nobeku: 8:16pm On Sep 28, 2015

raayah:
Very Very bad Advice!

Look, my own mother suffered abuse in the hands of her husband after doing heaven and earth for him. You know what my mother told me one day? She sat me down and said, "Raayah. My husband does not love me, If he did, he will not abuse me like this for no reason".

Weeks after that, She moved out and hasn't looked back. She is planning to return the dowry to his people very soon. Life is so much better for her. No more spending nights at the hospital,(Yes, that's how serious the physical and mental abuse was), no more tears.. Life is good!

If you choose to stay with an abusive man because of the "children" or because you cannot "live independently", then say so. Don't tell women to stay with men with abusive men..
Same advice for men, don't stay with abusive women. They can kill

She dared him by doing what? How many of you will fight an agbero who dares you, or a man who disrespects you, Not a lot!
But when it comes to your wife, she does something wrong, you decide to give her head injury!
All of you justifying this abuse are cowards, yes I said it!

Stop being a child of anger..

1 Like

Re: Hear What A Mother Told Her Daughter On Her Wedding Day by Nobody: 8:20pm On Sep 28, 2015

raayah:
Very Very bad Advice!

Look, my own mother suffered abuse in the hands of her husband after doing heaven and earth for him. You know what my mother told me one day? She sat me down and said, "Raayah. My husband does not love me, If he did, he will not abuse me like this for no reason".

Weeks after that, She moved out and hasn't looked back. She is planning to return the dowry to his people very soon. Life is so much better for her. No more spending nights at the hospital,(Yes, that's how serious the physical and mental abuse was), no more tears.. Life is good!

If you choose to stay with an abusive man because of the "children" or because you cannot "live independently", then say so. Don't tell women to stay with men with abusive men..
Same advice for men, don't stay with abusive women. They can kill

She dared him by doing what? How many of you will fight an agbero who dares you, or a man who disrespects you, Not a lot!
But when it comes to your wife, she does something wrong, you decide to give her head injury!
All of you justifying this abuse are cowards, yes I said it!

Very well said.

@red

There is no reason to stay in a dysfunctional marriage because of kids. Children whose parents separate peacefully and reasonably are happier and healthier than those from dysfunctional families where abuse, physical or verbal, is the order of the day.

2 Likes

Re: Hear What A Mother Told Her Daughter On Her Wedding Day by Amustical(op): 9:11pm On Sep 28, 2015

https://www.nairaland.com/2510298/beautiful-letter-written-father-son

safarigirl:
Somebody please get a father to write his son a letter on his wedding day for once in this misogynistic society. We're tired of this recycled letter

Re: Hear What A Mother Told Her Daughter On Her Wedding Day by SStoneCCold: 11:06am On Sep 30, 2015

raayah:
Very Very bad Advice!

Look, my own mother suffered abuse in the hands of her husband after doing heaven and earth for him. You know what my mother told me one day? She sat me down and said, "Raayah. My husband does not love me, If he did, he will not abuse me like this for no reason".

Weeks after that, She moved out and hasn't looked back. She is planning to return the dowry to his people very soon. Life is so much better for her. No more spending nights at the hospital,(Yes, that's how serious the physical and mental abuse was), no more tears.. Life is good!

If you choose to stay with an abusive man because of the "children" or because you cannot "live independently", then say so. Don't tell women to stay with men with abusive men..
Same advice for men, don't stay with abusive women. They can kill

She dared him by doing what? How many of you will fight an agbero who dares you, or a man who disrespects you, Not a lot!
But when it comes to your wife, she does something wrong, you decide to give her head injury!
All of you justifying this abuse are cowards, yes I said it!

Encourage your mother to go back to your father and encourage your father to stop the abuse. God hates divorce Malachi 2:16

Re: Hear What A Mother Told Her Daughter On Her Wedding Day by Joy1706(f): 12:13pm On Sep 30, 2015

linusbnn:
If you love him,you will not count how many times you have forgiven him,rather pray God to help him realise his mistakes. Marriage is a union of two diff entities and belief,so ENDURANCE is the key coupled with prayers. Family dat pray together,stay together,and that duty lies largely on the part of the woman.

The duty lies largely on the part of the women? I thought you men were the heads of ur homes. Abi na just 4 mouth?

Re: Hear What A Mother Told Her Daughter On Her Wedding Day by linusbnn(m): 12:05pm On Oct 01, 2015

Joy1706:
The duty lies largely on the part of the women? I thought you men were the heads of ur homes. Abi na just 4 mouth?

Women are keeper and coordinator of the home,men are protector. Just like Lioness goes hunting to feed the home,the Lion never hunt but rather stay back and keep his territory safe from external attack.

Re: Hear What A Mother Told Her Daughter On Her Wedding Day by Joy1706(f): 10:46pm On Oct 01, 2015

linusbnn:
Women are keeper and coordinator of the home,men are protector. Just like Lioness goes hunting to feed the home,the Lion never hunt but rather stay back and keep his territory safe from external attack.

Abeg what are the men protecting?

Re: Hear What A Mother Told Her Daughter On Her Wedding Day by linusbnn(m): 9:01pm On Oct 02, 2015

Joy1706:
Abeg what are the men protecting?

You and the family

Re: Hear What A Mother Told Her Daughter On Her Wedding Day by DeRay98(m): 8:08pm On Oct 15, 2015

ireneidiva:
This your grammar can kill!

All typo errors due hasty typing from phone

Re: Hear What A Mother Told Her Daughter On Her Wedding Day by laprince(m): 7:45am On Dec 08, 2015*

raayah:
When you provoke or dare your boss, he fires you! If your woman is too much and you cannot communicate effectively with her, Maybe its time for a divorce.. not head injury!

I understand your argument perfectly. your continous option for divorce is a little reckless.

We are not in a perfect world. Many a time, am sure you do what you earlier decided not to do. So, do you have to kill yourself!!! Emotional outbursts, is being human. Don't induce it, and then seek wilful cooperation

from the story, after the woman learnt her lesson, they seemed to be living in peace thereafter.

personally, I have never had a fight with neither a male nor female. But some jst push it.

Ladies should also know when to stop talking, as everyone has a breaking point.

NB: STOP FANTASY OF PERFECTION; IT DOES NOT EXIST.

I HATE ANY SORT OF ABUSE.

Re: Hear What A Mother Told Her Daughter On Her Wedding Day by laprince(m): 8:07am On Dec 08, 2015

raayah:
why didn't my husband forgive me instead of injuring me.. is it only women that should forgive

with this. I give up

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