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Romancelanders, Pls I Need Your Urgent And Sincere Advice!!! - Romance - Nairaland

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How It Started.... Romancelanders Pls Read And Help Me / I'm Confused!!!!!!! I Need Your Sincere Advice, Nairalanders / Greatest Romancelanders..pls Epp Ooh..pls Oya Everybody Rush In Here (2) (3) (4)

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Romancelanders, Pls I Need Your Urgent And Sincere Advice!!! by pxdaniel(m): 2:38pm On Sep 29, 2015
Before I start, I want to plead with all trolls and those who have nothing meaningful to say to stay off this thread. I'm not opening this thread for jokes or out of idleness but because I need a good advice which I hope to get. Here's my story:
I've been dating my gf since 100l and we are both in 500l now. I'm 22yrs while she's 21yrs and this is my first and only relationship. She will be graduating this session while I'll be graduating next session because I'm doing a 6yr course. We've been through a lot in this rship but I still love her and would love to continue with the rship but the problem is that I can hardly trust her now.
My reason is that she keeps a lot of so-called toasters around her not out of love as she claims but so as to 'milk' them because her parents are not adequately providing for her ( I can say this a very true). I wasn't comfortable with this at first but I had to let it go because I'm not capable to meet all her needs as I'm a student as well and I believed her that it was only me she loves and that she doesn't sell her body in the process. However, she completely shattered my heart when I found out that she went to a club and hotel with one of her toasters on her birthday last month. I couldn't be with her that day because she was on her IT in a neighboring state and she gave me some flimsy excuse that she would be busy with work and all that. When I confronted her, she tried to lie her way out of it and cried like a baby all through but I didn't let her fool me once again.
The guy works in an oil company and he bought her a brand new laptop, gowns and even gave her money. He has also been giving her money before that day and she once claimed he was her uncle until I found out that was a lie and she promised me she was only eating his money and nothing else. She told me absolutely nothing happened between them and that I'm the only one she has ever slept with. She begged me to see reason with her that she's only keeping those toasters so that she can survive since her parents do not have much and that if she didn't love me then she could easily have broken up with me since 100l but I didn't listen and called off the relationship.
However, she kept asking me for forgiveness and since I still love her I accepted her back but I'm having difficulty trusting her. She has accepted to do away with all her toasters and be fully faithful but I still have my fears. Moreover, she will be graduating before me and there's no guarantee that she won't go back to her former self. I feel so much inadequate right now. I still have 2yrs before I graduate plus internship and nysc before I even start working so how do I cope with her needs. Though, I have to admit that she doesn't demand much from me but I feel she would be tempted to leave me for ready-made guys since I still have a long way to cope.
Pls, I need your advice on how to deal with this situation. How do I cope with my fears? How do I keep out predators from coming between us again? How do I handle financial matters when they arise? How do I build up the trust once more?
This issue has affected me so badly that I now see all girls as runs girl and treat them as such. My apologies to all real girls out there. Lemme stop here for now cos I'm on a queue in a general hospital to see a doctor for anoda matter and it has almost gotten to my turn. Pls pardon my typos or if I sound incoherent.
Just advice me based on what you can understand from my write-up and ask any question that you feel is relevant. God bless u all
Re: Romancelanders, Pls I Need Your Urgent And Sincere Advice!!! by tellwisdom: 2:57pm On Sep 29, 2015
Guy, u are too small to even be in a relationship involving sex...You are a small boi. sad

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Re: Romancelanders, Pls I Need Your Urgent And Sincere Advice!!! by Richiy(f): 3:00pm On Sep 29, 2015
I think you should put that relationship on pause for now. That girl will keep her toasters around and you will only keep getting hurt.

Last bullet: Forget serious relationship for now. Focus on finishing up and hustling your life. Now is not the time to get emotional at all.

3 Likes

Re: Romancelanders, Pls I Need Your Urgent And Sincere Advice!!! by Nobody: 3:12pm On Sep 29, 2015
I find it strange that you're calling the other men "predators", when the real predator is the one you're in a relationship with. I have an issue with people who can't live within their means & make do with what they have, but instead leech off other people because they're greedy at heart. Now imagine marrying this type of lady in the future, what do you think will happen when you can't meet all her financial demands? She sounds very entitled & unfortunately, love has blinded you to the point where you're unable to see that you've been demoted to a glorified "yes man" & a love-vendor. What man would be okay with his woman getting money off other guys? Don't you ever ask yourself at what expense are they willing to part with their hard earned money? She must be giving them something in return & it's a shame that you're fooled by the croc tears + manipulative lip service. Ding. Ding. Ding. Wake up! She doesn't have a good character going by your narration. She's money hungry & if you choose to stay with her, you'll be the one crying in the end.

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Re: Romancelanders, Pls I Need Your Urgent And Sincere Advice!!! by Luckygurl(f): 3:14pm On Sep 29, 2015
Hmmmm!!!
It's just a matter of time before it's over.
She's becoming overly close with her toasters and that's not a good sign, seriously.

You really love this girl but what's the probability it'd work out between you guys?
Truth is this, you kinda still have a long way to go and that's not the same with her.

I suggest you have a heart to heart discussion with her.
She's in a relationship, it's normal she respects that and cut down on her closeness with her toasters. She ought to know where to draw the line and in my opinion going to the hotel and club with some guy is far from it.

If there's not much improvement, I suggest you take a walk while you still have the time and don't wait till it's too late.

#sidetalk
More reason why I don't support any relationship between underg's in the same level.
Swallow me but that's my opinion....
Re: Romancelanders, Pls I Need Your Urgent And Sincere Advice!!! by Luckygurl(f): 3:21pm On Sep 29, 2015
People like this are the ones that give the female folks bad name.
Can't she just be content with the little her parents can afford and avoid those other guys.

Like I said, it's just a matter of time and everything comes crashing like a pack of cards...
Make your choice......

1 Like

Re: Romancelanders, Pls I Need Your Urgent And Sincere Advice!!! by cutesmilez(f): 3:26pm On Sep 29, 2015
cry Touching story
Re: Romancelanders, Pls I Need Your Urgent And Sincere Advice!!! by Nobody: 3:28pm On Sep 29, 2015
Guy,the best thing for you right now is to fully concentrate on your career in order to create a brighter and a rewarding future for yourself!...The truth is, she doesn't love you!...No woman, I repeat, no woman that claims to sincerely and passionately love a guy would go to the extent of keeping"toasters"just to fend for herself!..and to crown it all, she says nothing happens between she nd her toasters?...that's a fat lie!...The guy that got her the Laptop and clothes is surely sleeping with her!...Get that into your skull Man!....i'll advice you to steer clear of that relationship pls...she'll cheat on you more nd more especially this one she's graduating before you!...a word is enough for the wise!

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Re: Romancelanders, Pls I Need Your Urgent And Sincere Advice!!! by slim19(m): 3:31pm On Sep 29, 2015
She loves you but love money more and she would do anything to get it
Re: Romancelanders, Pls I Need Your Urgent And Sincere Advice!!! by pxdaniel(m): 3:34pm On Sep 29, 2015
tellwisdom:
Guy, u are too small to even be in a relationship involving sex...You are a small boi. sad

How am I too young to be in a rship? Besides, is that the only contribution you can make?

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Re: Romancelanders, Pls I Need Your Urgent And Sincere Advice!!! by Nobody: 3:36pm On Sep 29, 2015
Don't let her fool you with her tears....dont let her fool you Man!...I repeat,Dont!...it's still better u take actions before the matter becomes worse...coz by then, u'll be seriously regretting yourself!...if she loves you truly, you'll have to use ur instincts to figure it out!...Have a niceday ahead!

1 Like

Re: Romancelanders, Pls I Need Your Urgent And Sincere Advice!!! by Nobody: 3:37pm On Sep 29, 2015
Luckygurl:
People like this are the ones that give the female folks bad name.
Can't she just be content with the little her parents can afford and avoid those other guys.

Like I said, it's just a matter of time and everything comes crashing like a pack of cards...
Make your choice......

Quoted for fact.
Re: Romancelanders, Pls I Need Your Urgent And Sincere Advice!!! by Nobody: 3:39pm On Sep 29, 2015
Thowbie7:
Guy,the best thing for you right now is to fully concentrate on your career in order to create a brighter and a rewarding future for yourself!...The truth is, she doesn't love you!...No woman, I repeat, no woman that claims to sincerely and passionately love a guy would go to the extent of keeping"toasters"just to fend for herself!..and to crown it all, she says nothing happens between she nd her toasters?...that's a fat lie!...The guy that got her the Laptop and clothes is surely sleeping with her!...Get that into your skull Man!....i'll advice you to steer clear of that relationship pls...she'll cheat on you more nd more especially this one she's graduating before you!...a word is enough for the wise!

Troof!
Re: Romancelanders, Pls I Need Your Urgent And Sincere Advice!!! by Nobody: 3:42pm On Sep 29, 2015
PunkyVeer:
I find it strange that you're calling the other men "predators", when the real predator is the one you're in a relationship with. I have an issue with people who can't live within their means & make do with what they have, but instead leech off other people because they're greedy at heart. Now imagine marrying this type of lady in the future, what do you think will happen when you can't meet all her financial demands? She sounds very entitled & unfortunately, love has blinded you to the point where you're unable to see that you've been demoted to a glorified "yes man" & a love-vendor. What man would be okay with his woman getting money off other guys? Don't you ever ask yourself at what expense are they willing to part with their hard earned money? She must be giving them something in return & it's a shame that you're fooled by the croc tears + manipulative lip service. Ding. Ding. Ding. Wake up! She doesn't have a good character going by your narration. She's money hungry & if you choose to stay with her, you'll be the one crying in the end.

You have said it all
listen to this shìt

Re: Romancelanders, Pls I Need Your Urgent And Sincere Advice!!! by pxdaniel(m): 3:42pm On Sep 29, 2015
Richiy:
I think you should put that relationship on pause for now. That girl will keep her toasters around and you will only keep getting hurt.

Last bullet: Forget serious relationship for now. Focus on finishing up and hustling your life. Now is not the time to get emotional at all.

Tnx 4 ur contribution. But how are u sure she wouldn't change this time around? I'm only emotional abt d issue cos she's d only one I've ever dated and I would love 4 dat to continue since I'm not interested in hit and run games like my friends are currently doing
Re: Romancelanders, Pls I Need Your Urgent And Sincere Advice!!! by lekan29ice(m): 3:44pm On Sep 29, 2015
focus on ur education first and don't let her affect u ... Sooner or late she will go back to her toasters since u can't meet all her needs cos u still have a long way to go
Re: Romancelanders, Pls I Need Your Urgent And Sincere Advice!!! by Remilekun101: 3:44pm On Sep 29, 2015
[size=20pt]She lied that he was her uncle, she later confessed that he was her toaster, then he took her to a club and hotel (to go and sleep overnight abi)... dude wake up, she isn't your, she has moved on to greater things[/size]
Re: Romancelanders, Pls I Need Your Urgent And Sincere Advice!!! by tellwisdom: 3:50pm On Sep 29, 2015
pxdaniel:


How am I too young to be in a rship? Besides, is that the only contribution you can make?

Reason why i said you are too small to be in a relationship. This gurl is not yours...she's gone bro. U wan make i break ur heart more??
Re: Romancelanders, Pls I Need Your Urgent And Sincere Advice!!! by cutesmilez(f): 3:50pm On Sep 29, 2015
Remilekun101:
[size=20pt]She lied that he was her uncle, she later confessed that he was her toaster, then he took her to a club and hotel (to go and sleep overnight abi)... dude wake up, she isn't your, she has moved on to greater things[/size]
bros, na wa o
Re: Romancelanders, Pls I Need Your Urgent And Sincere Advice!!! by xpac01(m): 3:54pm On Sep 29, 2015
My brother, the only thing torturing you right now is your too much emotional attachment to your girl. I understand how emotional and crazy love could get a man sometimes because you feel you got to protect your territory. Now my serious advice to is that: you have a better life to live, so detach yourself a bit. Your emotional attachment may not really cause changes in your girl. Just live your life as a fun afterall life's fun.. Keep tabs on her, but mind you when the going gets rough, simply let go. You've got better life ahead. Have fun.
Re: Romancelanders, Pls I Need Your Urgent And Sincere Advice!!! by DEIFIED(m): 3:56pm On Sep 29, 2015
Op according to the comments here, i think the ladies have a vote of no confidence on this your relationship. So i have to advice you to just let her go, first of all she is a materialistic and insatiable girl, even if you have the money to spend on her she is still going to look outside.
I hate it when some girls claims to be very open and mingle with all manner of men in the guise of '' i am very free with everyone''. Most of them are just cheat and slutish in nature.
Re: Romancelanders, Pls I Need Your Urgent And Sincere Advice!!! by Remilekun101: 3:57pm On Sep 29, 2015
cutesmilez:
bros, na wa o

[size=20pt]baba too much of p.us.sy is affecting the guy[/size]
Re: Romancelanders, Pls I Need Your Urgent And Sincere Advice!!! by Nobody: 3:59pm On Sep 29, 2015
pxdaniel:
How do I keep out predators from coming between us again?

If you decide to continue with the relationship its her job to keep the predators away.

You seem so lost in this relationship abeg take care of yourself don't let it consume you.
Re: Romancelanders, Pls I Need Your Urgent And Sincere Advice!!! by pxdaniel(m): 4:14pm On Sep 29, 2015
xpac01:
My brother, the only thing torturing you right now is your too much emotional attachment to your girl. I understand how emotional and crazy love could get a man sometimes because you feel you got to protect your territory. Now my serious advice to is that: you have a better life to live, so detach yourself a bit. Your emotional attachment may not really cause changes in your girl. Just live your life as a fun afterall life's fun.. Keep tabs on her, but mind you when the going gets rough, simply let go. You've got better life ahead. Have fun.

I appreciate ur comment but what ways do u think I can have fun and detach myself away 4rm her cos I seem to think about her all d time
Re: Romancelanders, Pls I Need Your Urgent And Sincere Advice!!! by pxdaniel(m): 4:16pm On Sep 29, 2015
andromida:


If you decide to continue with the relationship its her job to keep the predators away.

You seem so lost in this relationship abeg take care of yourself don't let it consume you.



Tnx...I've really lost a lot of weight. I dunno if its d stress 4rm school or this issue
Re: Romancelanders, Pls I Need Your Urgent And Sincere Advice!!! by pxdaniel(m): 4:18pm On Sep 29, 2015
tellwisdom:


Reason why i said you are too small to be in a relationship. This gurl is not yours...she's gone bro. U wan make i break ur heart more??

Ok...
Re: Romancelanders, Pls I Need Your Urgent And Sincere Advice!!! by pxdaniel(m): 4:20pm On Sep 29, 2015
PunkyVeer:
I find it strange that you're calling the other men "predators", when the real predator is the one you're in a relationship with. I have an issue with people who can't live within their means & make do with what they have, but instead leech off other people because they're greedy at heart. Now imagine marrying this type of lady in the future, what do you think will happen when you can't meet all her financial demands? She sounds very entitled & unfortunately, love has blinded you to the point where you're unable to see that you've been demoted to a glorified "yes man" & a love-vendor. What man would be okay with his woman getting money off other guys? Don't you ever ask yourself at what expense are they willing to part with their hard earned money? She must be giving them something in return & it's a shame that you're fooled by the croc tears + manipulative lip service. Ding. Ding. Ding. Wake up! She doesn't have a good character going by your narration. She's money hungry & if you choose to stay with her, you'll be the one crying in the end.

Hmmm...its nice hearing this 4rm a girl. Tnx a lot
Re: Romancelanders, Pls I Need Your Urgent And Sincere Advice!!! by bobbyluis(m): 4:22pm On Sep 29, 2015
be careful with that girl,she might invite u to her wedding







#BOB
Re: Romancelanders, Pls I Need Your Urgent And Sincere Advice!!! by pxdaniel(m): 4:22pm On Sep 29, 2015
Thowbie7:
Guy,the best thing for you right now is to fully concentrate on your career in order to create a brighter and a rewarding future for yourself!...The truth is, she doesn't love you!...No woman, I repeat, no woman that claims to sincerely and passionately love a guy would go to the extent of keeping"toasters"just to fend for herself!..and to crown it all, she says nothing happens between she nd her toasters?...that's a fat lie!...The guy that got her the Laptop and clothes is surely sleeping with her!...Get that into your skull Man!....i'll advice you to steer clear of that relationship pls...she'll cheat on you more nd more especially this one she's graduating before you!...a word is enough for the wise!

Tnk u so much 4 dis ur comment. But if d girl doesn't love me as u say why hasn't she broken up with me and move on with those her rich toasters? This issue is really confusing me
Re: Romancelanders, Pls I Need Your Urgent And Sincere Advice!!! by Nobody: 4:24pm On Sep 29, 2015
pxdaniel:



Tnx...I've really lost a lot of weight. I dunno if its d stress 4rm school or this issue

Welcome you need to be in control of yourself not even the relationship for now you are both starting in life you don't know how this will pan out. Take it easy on yourself you don't have to sort out everything right now, one day at a time you will be fine.
Re: Romancelanders, Pls I Need Your Urgent And Sincere Advice!!! by pxdaniel(m): 4:25pm On Sep 29, 2015
bobbyluis:
be careful with that girl,she might invite u to her wedding[color=#000099][/color]








#BOB

I agree with you. She told me she would like to get married by 24 or 25yrs but I would jst be finishing my nysc by then
Re: Romancelanders, Pls I Need Your Urgent And Sincere Advice!!! by pxdaniel(m): 4:28pm On Sep 29, 2015
Remilekun101:


[size=20pt]baba too much of p.us.sy is affecting the guy[/size]

I'm not a sex freak. FYI, she doesn't even like sex cos of d pain it gives her. More reason why I believe she doesn't sleep around with her toasters

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