₦airaland Forum

smileysmiley:
you would never know that you are affected by that cause you will be forming "I'm not a crybaby".... I'm a female, I never found marriage as an interesting thing and I still don't now... why mum and dad are separated, I grew up in an area filled with marital violence too, various couples hurting themselves. I've always envisioned myself living alone with a child probably and doing fine... why my psychology has been played with as a child. Not everyone finds marriage interesting and statistics have shown that it is common among kids from broken homes (Google it), if mumsy and popsy had the sweet kind of marriage, you would have been singing a different tune now.

maybe you're right. but I can't base my decision on the experience of my parents but my personal experience. may be they affected me like 0.0001% but the my decision is influenced chiefly by my own experience.

killjoy:
maybe you're right. but I can't base my decision on the experience of my parents but my personal experience. may be they affected me like 0.0001% but the my decision is influenced chiefly by my own experience.

ok

killjoy:
@ColinAdua. NYC idea. wud create a bachelor's group one of dis days. more power to Ur elbow

Bro I am still waiting for this group.

ColinAdua:
YES!!! Tyler Perry's movies are one of the life scripts I use. The major script is the Holy Scriptures (The Bible) which is not crazy about marriage today, but crazy about Christian EVANGELISM (1 Corinthians 7 : 8, 26, 38. Mark 16 : 15 -18)

I like Tyler Perry's movies because they are mirrors, they are reflections of marriages in our societies today. They exposes the ills and challenges in marriages in our societies today, to get us fully aware, equip and prepared, if we after all wants to tow that uncertain unnecessary path.

Tyler Perry himself is not married at 45, despite being one of the richest African American movie director and producer.

I wish I had watched "Temptation: Confession of a marriage counselor" by 2003, ten years before it was produced and released. I would have been properly prepared when I found myself in almost the same situation like Brice, 10 years before.

Very soon, your eyes will open and you will know that marriage is no JOKE, by then we will know who is a joke between you and me. You will come back here to find consolation in this thread, and if you are sincere and truthful to yourself, you will tell me "I envy you, I wish I can be strong like you"

A lot of my pro-marriage friends with all these unrealistic, unmet, unfulfilled marriage bliss fantasies, usually come back after arguing with me to tell me "Colin I envy you. I wish I can be like you"

Am an old man and I used to be a Christian Marriage counselor, especially in the area of sexual maladjustment/incompatibility. Most people I counseled do not even know that am not married.

I heal marriages. I have been in the forefront. I know the problems/foolishness of marriages. They are three;
1) Selfishness,
2) Frustrations due to unmet expectations(selfishness),
3) Unwillingness by couples, to bend down, sacrifice and working on their marriages(this is the worst caused by selfishness).

These three problems, are very difficult for a lot of people both Christians and unbelievers to work on. That's why marriage is not worth it today.

People are too selfish today (even the so called born agains) to bend down and work on their marriages, so am better off the way I am. A single.

So, from the experiences of people I counsel, my Bible and my personal target/aim in life, I have come to the realization that marriage doesn't worth it.

Believe me, it doesn't!!

God bless you. [

Bros since you ain't gonna marry, how will you cope with sex? remember body no be firewood sir.

virginboy1:
Bros since you ain't gonna marry, how will you cope with sex? remember body no be firewood sir.

seriously, did you just ask that?

Are you saying one can't get good sex without being married?

killjoy:
readers discretion adviced: this is a long post. get a bowl of popcorn and your glasses. turn off the TV , you don't want to get distracted. if it took me time to write such a lengthy post, I wonder why you should complain about reading it. below are the reasons.

1. We're too different to live together: women love people and relationships, men love objects (like cars, houses, gadgets, game consoles etc), a man's lot is his career, a woman's is marriage (according to the curse after the fall of man), women are indirect, men are always direct, men want sex before they develop feelings for women, women can't have sex without emotional attachment first(unless they r who.res, even if they are who.res lolzzz), a man wants to hv sex, a woman wants to make love (I swear she doesn't even mind just cuddling), men see having dinner as a time to quench hunger, women see having dinner as time for bonding, let me continue? A married man without money feels unfulfilled, a wealthy woman without a man feels similarly, I can go on and on! But no time, my point, you need a lot of patience, tolerance, understanding, endurance, compromise etc to survive in marriage. But life is too short, stay single and be free to be urself or get married and spend the rest of your life struggling to be another person. Continue reading, this is just one of seven.

2. Love doesn't exist: if you intend to stake your future with a woman on an emotion as erratic as love, then you need to have ur head examined. Love is an emotional convulsion which, like other sicknesses, are recovered from with time. Experience has thought me that a woman's love is only skin deep, but you can accentuate it with money. Ohhhh how women react to the smell of cash. Bleep love and go make some muller.

3. You don't need a child: the world will remember you by the kids you left behind. That's a big fat lie!! You don't need a carbon copy of yourself roaming the earth after your demise to ensure your immortality. Instead, the world will remember you by the feats you surmounted! Obama will be remembered not as the father of, I don't even know his child's name and I don't give a fvck bout it! But as the first black US President. Mother Theresa never had a child, Einstein's legacy is not his kids but his discoveries. My point! You are not remembered by the kids you had but the records you set. But if you badly want a kid, adopt one, or get a baby mama and impregnate her but never, never get married just to have kids. marriage is too great a price to pay.

4. There is absolutely nothing new marriage has to offer you: just be honest with yourself. A family? You already belong to one (or do you think you just appeared out of thin air?), love? Your mother loves you like die, trust moi. A woman to manage your home? Get a maid! pay her well and she will manage your home without complications like disrespecting you, PMS, etc. Sex? Gone are the days men marry for sex ooo!!! Sex is damn cheap, you don't need marriage to enjoy it. By the way, what makes you think getting married entitles you to sex when you want it, ie, if at all?? U never jam female Hitler. Continue reading, I'm not even close to the end.

5. Marriage is expensive: a woman's problems end when she gets married (at least on financial level), while a man's problems just begin. Most ladies don't have plans of making money(some stop after getting married). for a woman, after graduating from uni, a husband is top on d list above a job ie, if a job is on the list. Guys, stay alone and worry for one. Apart from financially, marriage drains you emotionally. You have to deal with a partner suffering from PMS five days in a month for life (by the time she reaches menopause, you'd be probably dead) and when she ain't suffering PMS, its worse cos she is pregnant!! Don't forget regular mood swings, test games, among other complicated female emotional ailments. Plus wait till you get divorced before you know how much financially and emotionally expensive marriage could be. That brings us to...

6. It may end up in divorce: possible causes of divorce. She gains weight, sex with one person for years gone stale and boring, the love (or whatever dumb ass name you call it) fades, you want a new woman, (men are polygamous by nature, hard truth. Deal with it), she is no longer the woman you married, (true, women do change after marriage for many reasons, that is story for another day), you cheat on her, she cheats on you, many many more. Don't scar yourself with a painful divorce. Stay single and happy.

7. You get to focus on your dreams without distractions. Like I said earlier, a man's career is his lot (or curse). As s man if you haven't got a successful career, you will probably die unhappy and unproductive. The compromise you have to make to keep her happy will retard you from achieving your dreams to the fullest. Pleasing a woman and pursuing your dreams are mutually exclusive. don't get married.

disclaimer: its ironic when people say honesty is a virtue yet can't bear to hear (or read) the truth.

nota bene: I am not prejudiced towards women. I hate all equally.

In essence,the summary of this post of yours is,the key to a man's success is to concentrate on developing/improving himself rather than focusing on courting or marrying some woman or bearing children who aren't worth the time/energy right?
I completely agree with you

bro. l greet u

killjoy:
readers discretion adviced: this is a long post. get a bowl of popcorn and your glasses. turn off the TV , you don't want to get distracted. if it took me time to write such a lengthy post, I wonder why you should complain about reading it. below are the reasons.

1. We're too different to live together: women love people and relationships, men love objects (like cars, houses, gadgets, game consoles etc), a man's lot is his career, a woman's is marriage (according to the curse after the fall of man), women are indirect, men are always direct, men want sex before they develop feelings for women, women can't have sex without emotional attachment first(unless they r who.res, even if they are who.res lolzzz), a man wants to hv sex, a woman wants to make love (I swear she doesn't even mind just cuddling), men see having dinner as a time to quench hunger, women see having dinner as time for bonding, let me continue? A married man without money feels unfulfilled, a wealthy woman without a man feels similarly, I can go on and on! But no time, my point, you need a lot of patience, tolerance, understanding, endurance, compromise etc to survive in marriage. But life is too short, stay single and be free to be urself or get married and spend the rest of your life struggling to be another person. Continue reading, this is just one of seven.

2. Love doesn't exist: if you intend to stake your future with a woman on an emotion as erratic as love, then you need to have ur head examined. Love is an emotional convulsion which, like other sicknesses, are recovered from with time. Experience has thought me that a woman's love is only skin deep, but you can accentuate it with money. Ohhhh how women react to the smell of cash. Bleep love and go make some muller.

3. You don't need a child: the world will remember you by the kids you left behind. That's a big fat lie!! You don't need a carbon copy of yourself roaming the earth after your demise to ensure your immortality. Instead, the world will remember you by the feats you surmounted! Obama will be remembered not as the father of, I don't even know his child's name and I don't give a fvck bout it! But as the first black US President. Mother Theresa never had a child, Einstein's legacy is not his kids but his discoveries. My point! You are not remembered by the kids you had but the records you set. But if you badly want a kid, adopt one, or get a baby mama and impregnate her but never, never get married just to have kids. marriage is too great a price to pay.

4. There is absolutely nothing new marriage has to offer you: just be honest with yourself. A family? You already belong to one (or do you think you just appeared out of thin air?), love? Your mother loves you like die, trust moi. A woman to manage your home? Get a maid! pay her well and she will manage your home without complications like disrespecting you, PMS, etc. Sex? Gone are the days men marry for sex ooo!!! Sex is damn cheap, you don't need marriage to enjoy it. By the way, what makes you think getting married entitles you to sex when you want it, ie, if at all?? U never jam female Hitler. Continue reading, I'm not even close to the end.

5. Marriage is expensive: a woman's problems end when she gets married (at least on financial level), while a man's problems just begin. Most ladies don't have plans of making money(some stop after getting married). for a woman, after graduating from uni, a husband is top on d list above a job ie, if a job is on the list. Guys, stay alone and worry for one. Apart from financially, marriage drains you emotionally. You have to deal with a partner suffering from PMS five days in a month for life (by the time she reaches menopause, you'd be probably dead) and when she ain't suffering PMS, its worse cos she is pregnant!! Don't forget regular mood swings, test games, among other complicated female emotional ailments. Plus wait till you get divorced before you know how much financially and emotionally expensive marriage could be. That brings us to...

6. It may end up in divorce: possible causes of divorce. She gains weight, sex with one person for years gone stale and boring, the love (or whatever dumb ass name you call it) fades, you want a new woman, (men are polygamous by nature, hard truth. Deal with it), she is no longer the woman you married, (true, women do change after marriage for many reasons, that is story for another day), you cheat on her, she cheats on you, many many more. Don't scar yourself with a painful divorce. Stay single and happy.

7. You get to focus on your dreams without distractions. Like I said earlier, a man's career is his lot (or curse). As s man if you haven't got a successful career, you will probably die unhappy and unproductive. The compromise you have to make to keep her happy will retard you from achieving your dreams to the fullest. Pleasing a woman and pursuing your dreams are mutually exclusive. don't get married.

disclaimer: its ironic when people say honesty is a virtue yet can't bear to hear (or read) the truth.

nota bene: I am not prejudiced towards women. I hate all equally.

I will think about this points,makes sense......thought about already......conclusion "I will still marry" The poster below is Hiv positive.... beware!

chenzen:
bro. l greet u

same here

Hmm

You can say whatever you like its not going to be worst than LYING AGAINST ME.

All am saying is; SINGLE MEN MAKES MONEY AND SUCCESS, BETTER.

The last time I checked Giorgio Armani is still single at 79 years, worths $10 Billion.

Yeah! Am chronically Anti-marriage not even patently and it suppose to effect my reasoning.

You are telling him that the richest men in the world are married, I prove you wrong; that the richest man in the whole world is single. You turned around to complain.

So is that the way you will conduct the successful marriage? eeeeeh? If your wife proves you wrong you become bitter.

Well, Singlehood is strength, singlehood is sweet and singlehood is sumptuous.

Where is this man and killjoy? They have questions to answer

After reading a new post on a selfish b**ch that didn't want to contribute shishi from her 80k and want her husband earning 300k to shoulder all her problems . This post becomes clearer and revelative every year. A word is enough for the wise

traware:
Hmm...you sound exactly like me.Women must have shown you hell like they've also shown me.From my personal experience,marriage,women and children are a total waste of time and energy.Married men are slaves to their wives and children.My advice to young men out there is to never ever get married instead,use that energy to build a business or concentrate on better endeavours.Louis Vuitton,Harley Davidson,Steve Jobs even Lipton,these are all men who are dead and gone but their legacies live on.Do you think I'm lying?Pray tell,what is the name of Chinua Achebes' wife/wives?How many child/children does he have?There is no such thing as 'happily married',its an oxymoron.its like saying a person is 'happily dead'.Read the book "The Manipulated Man" by Esther Vilar and learn more

This guy is blowing my mind

queenBVVIP:
There is great honor in marriage. The society is greatly rewarded by it,otherwise the society would have been filled with bastards, savages and non-entities. Marriage is not overrated,rather it spiraled out of control due to mismanagement from parents to current generation.
Now whose son are you by the way? I know you will be proud to say,"I am the son of ..."

On your point though….are you sure?

Look at other God’s creation, plants, animals, birds, insects, etc…..there is quite an order even without marriage.

I must say that, the animal kingdom have more serenity and order compare we humans. Have paused and watched in amazement how orderly and organized bees are, despite their little statues, what about the rest of creature, in fact the earth spins on its axis as it simultaneously revolves around the sun in an orderly fashion, same can be said about the other galaxy but we can’t elect a good leader in Nigeria.

Well, I am not supporting the idea that marriage is worthless though….just offering an option on the point you made.

This thread will be 10 years since first post in few days and I still always find reasons to search it up and read the contents.

It was hot then. 🔥

For many who agree or disagree, what is your opinion 10 years after.

Thank you.

killjoy:
readers discretion adviced: this is a long post. get a bowl of popcorn and your glasses. turn off the TV , you don't want to get distracted. if it took me time to write such a lengthy post, I wonder why you should complain about reading it. below are the reasons.

1. We're too different to live together: women love people and relationships, men love objects (like cars, houses, gadgets, game consoles etc), a man's lot is his career, a woman's is marriage (according to the curse after the fall of man), women are indirect, men are always direct, men want sex before they develop feelings for women, women can't have sex without emotional attachment first(unless they r who.res, even if they are who.res lolzzz), a man wants to hv sex, a woman wants to make love (I swear she doesn't even mind just cuddling), men see having dinner as a time to quench hunger, women see having dinner as time for bonding, let me continue? A married man without money feels unfulfilled, a wealthy woman without a man feels similarly, I can go on and on! But no time, my point, you need a lot of patience, tolerance, understanding, endurance, compromise etc to survive in marriage. But life is too short, stay single and be free to be urself or get married and spend the rest of your life struggling to be another person. Continue reading, this is just one of seven.

2. Love doesn't exist: if you intend to stake your future with a woman on an emotion as erratic as love, then you need to have ur head examined. Love is an emotional convulsion which, like other sicknesses, are recovered from with time. Experience has thought me that a woman's love is only skin deep, but you can accentuate it with money. Ohhhh how women react to the smell of cash. Bleep love and go make some muller.

3. You don't need a child: the world will remember you by the kids you left behind. That's a big fat lie!! You don't need a carbon copy of yourself roaming the earth after your demise to ensure your immortality. Instead, the world will remember you by the feats you surmounted! Obama will be remembered not as the father of, I don't even know his child's name and I don't give a fvck bout it! But as the first black US President. Mother Theresa never had a child, Einstein's legacy is not his kids but his discoveries. My point! You are not remembered by the kids you had but the records you set. But if you badly want a kid, adopt one, or get a baby mama and impregnate her but never, never get married just to have kids. marriage is too great a price to pay.

4. There is absolutely nothing new marriage has to offer you: just be honest with yourself. A family? You already belong to one (or do you think you just appeared out of thin air?), love? Your mother loves you like die, trust moi. A woman to manage your home? Get a maid! pay her well and she will manage your home without complications like disrespecting you, PMS, etc. Sex? Gone are the days men marry for sex ooo!!! Sex is damn cheap, you don't need marriage to enjoy it. By the way, what makes you think getting married entitles you to sex when you want it, ie, if at all?? U never jam female Hitler. Continue reading, I'm not even close to the end.

5. Marriage is expensive: a woman's problems end when she gets married (at least on financial level), while a man's problems just begin. Most ladies don't have plans of making money(some stop after getting married). for a woman, after graduating from uni, a husband is top on d list above a job ie, if a job is on the list. Guys, stay alone and worry for one. Apart from financially, marriage drains you emotionally. You have to deal with a partner suffering from PMS five days in a month for life (by the time she reaches menopause, you'd be probably dead) and when she ain't suffering PMS, its worse cos she is pregnant!! Don't forget regular mood swings, test games, among other complicated female emotional ailments. Plus wait till you get divorced before you know how much financially and emotionally expensive marriage could be. That brings us to...

6. It may end up in divorce: possible causes of divorce. She gains weight, sex with one person for years gone stale and boring, the love (or whatever dumb ass name you call it) fades, you want a new woman, (men are polygamous by nature, hard truth. Deal with it), she is no longer the woman you married, (true, women do change after marriage for many reasons, that is story for another day), you cheat on her, she cheats on you, many many more. Don't scar yourself with a painful divorce. Stay single and happy.

7. You get to focus on your dreams without distractions. Like I said earlier, a man's career is his lot (or curse). As s man if you haven't got a successful career, you will probably die unhappy and unproductive. The compromise you have to make to keep her happy will retard you from achieving your dreams to the fullest. Pleasing a woman and pursuing your dreams are mutually exclusive. don't get married.

disclaimer: its ironic when people say honesty is a virtue yet can't bear to hear (or read) the truth.

nota bene: I am not prejudiced towards women. I hate all equally.