ThIs must be an excuse from a woman who never really liked love makng.


OP you need to note that couple Don't have seX they make love plsssssssssssssss!

Tufanja:


I doubt if you understood my points...if you would have understood you would never give this comment.

So it gives the husband enough justification to follow his selfish desires and sentence the woman to a chance of another pregnancy? She is only asking him to use a condom, not even to deprive of it at all, not even demanding of him a sterilisation. What a big deal! Man can use condom when they go and sleep around but not when it is for a good purpose? #totallybiased

Do you know that with every pregnancy a woman put her body and life at risk? I would welcome you to spend some serious period in the labour room, you would never open your mouth like this anymore. Period. This lady might have much more serious arguments why the risk to have another child would not be a good idea. Why the heck are you guys even thinking about dropping a stone in her direction without knowing all the inside outs in the first place?

Besides...some fundamental reasoning problems here:

- Intercourse is no a right but a privilege. Nobody else has any say about your body but you and cant claim any right on it. Never. If the man doesnt want to use a condom, okay perfect, the woman has as much right to refuse intercourse without condom. To be honest, this should not even become an issue. One should seriously wonder what the lovebasis of your relationship is when you cant even find loving solutions on such minor issues.
- A woman who is in fear can never give her body and mind fully and in a loving way to a man. How do you think it feels when you sleeping with your man out of duty and only thinking while he is doing his thing "I hope I don't get pregnant"? Do you have even the smallest clue about how the female brain works and how we can stress and think about so many other things on such a moment while you are only thinking about satisfying yourself? And then those men come her on NL with a big mouth complaining the intercourse with their wife is not good and that she is holding back and they even give themselves reasons to cheat? WTF# What is the fun of the intercourse when you cant be both fully engaged in it and make it an instrument to communicate your love instead of making an instrument showing the lack of love?
- Where is the man taking responsibility? Where is he showing care for the fertility that is inherent part of his woman's life? He is not giving her the comfort that she needs to flourish and flow with him when he is not part of the solution.
- Sex and love are again totally mixed up here

With all due respect maam, are you married?

pentag0nal:
I know a couple that have three children. They don't want another child and the wife insisted they adopt a family planning method. They have gone to the hospital and the family planning has been done but even after that, the wife has insisted that the man must use condom anytime they want to have sex.

The man is very unhappy about this and becoming frustrated.

What you think guys, ladies?

Note that there is no case or suspicion of infidelity here, the woman is so afraid of getting pregnant again.

On no account should the man commit adultery. He should rather marry another wife if he can't hold the urge for sex. He shouldn't let the churches deceive him about that unrealistic 'one-man-one-wife' mantra.

who knows? the lady might have seen some traces of unfaithfulness in his husband,so she may just try to use the issue of condom as an excuse. so don't blame her to we don't know wat actually happened

For how long will her husband keep using condom.

" madam you better seek better advise before that man start looking for real perfect flesh center of gravity"

You better wise up and learn before it is too late.

Don't currupt that innocent man. Flesh plenty outside!

Insert out? Now that's stupid.

chrisbaby24:
Ok....make he do...INSERT IN...make he dey play...if he wan shoot out.....make he INSERT OUT...!!!!

The truth of the matter is that
1.The woman is wiser than u think:family planning alone sometimes fails
2.She doesn't trust the husband maybe she ounce contacted veneral diesease without being unfaithful to her husband
and she couldn't disclose to her hubby
Call it endtime prison

I see this as a non issue. The best way to put all doubts to rest is for the woman to have her tubes tied. Since she's the one afraid of getting pregnant and she already had 3 children it shouldn't be a big deal. She can even go behind the husband to get this done and there would be no tension. Ultimately Nigerian women must realize if you frustrate your husband over trivial issues, he's going to take those frustration out on something or someone else, more often than not it's going to result in him having extra-marital affairs and by then it's too late to compromise!

To hell with de condom, skin-to-skin ti takeover. Dat woman nid serious counselling sha

ndi ara

Family planning is not 100% trustworthy, my mum did that and after 10 yrs she became pregnant, to be on a safe side, let the man go for a vasectomy, lots of pple alwz say sacrifice for ur marriage, let the man go for it, and I saw a comment above abt what if some later happens and the man remarries and the man will want more children? What if something later happens too and the woman wants more children too, sometimes we need to balance things up! Tell the Christain bro to go for a vasectomy and stop raising nore issues since he wants to dive in skin to skin....maybe the woman almost died during the last child birth,u neva can tell.

We don't need to argue much.
It is evident that it is not an issue of avoiding pregnancy at all. I think the woman has recently learnt of some escapades the man is doing recently, and she is avoiding STDs!!!.
In this generation, most women know that the different family planning procedures usually effective. For her to accept it to be done on her body, which is the difficult aspect, I believe she doesn't trust the husband and she is avoiding STDs by all means.

This same act by another women led to her losing her happy home to another woman.

Cutehector:
what's pessary?

female cup that contains spermicide. What I'm saying Is the thing go dey inside the Toto dey kill all the sperm wey dey enter there

Na wa o. I hope this is just abt the fear of pregnancy. It's possible she doesn't trust the man or she has an infection herself, it myt just be d fear tho. If she is tht scared of getting pregnant let her go for tubal ligation and d husband for vasectomy if he agrees, so they can both continue enjoying themselves wt no fear.

abbey621:
I see this as a non issue. The best way to put all doubts to rest is for the woman to have her tubes tied. Since she's the one afraid of getting pregnant and she already had 3 children it shouldn't be a big deal. She can even go behind the husband to get this done and there would be no tension. Ultimately Nigerian women must realize if you frustrate your husband over trivial issues, he's going to take those frustration out on something or someone else, more often than not it's going to result in him having extra-marital affairs and by then it's too late to compromise!

This comment exactly illustrates why I wonder why Nigerian women are crazy about marriage. This is not a marriage but a prison. With as guard an immature man who thinks he can play husband.

If you frustrate a man, he can act like a not grown up child and respond in any possible way without even considering that he might be the cause of the frustration. But if you frustrate a woman...she should just shut up. #losersmentality

while we're on this, please do not poison the condoms being used by people.

attention: those of you in the line of production.

Quality control.

3rdlegxxx:


Thanks for educating us on this, i just learnt something new today, i am kind of disappointed by the few females who spoke and put the woman down, i thought as females they would tell us reasons why she might be doing what she is doing, instead they did what we guys would do and bash the wife.

As a person who has been through three difficult pregnancies and three Caesarean sections, I understand why a woman would say "no more babies" and actually do something about it.
However, I think she should take a step further by studying her cycle for six months. That should be enough time to give her a good idea of how her body works. During her safe period, the CD isn't necessary. When she is unsafe, her husband should use it. It's only for a few days anyway. Like someone rightly said, no method is 100% effective. She isn't entirely wrong for wanting to be safe, but compromise is necessary in marriage. There has to be a middle ground somewhere, to reduce friction in the relationship.

pentag0nal:


But she does not want to get pregnant again.

There are other ways to prevent pregnancies. My wife had the procedure done. We did it before our first, second and now our third. In fact it can be so effective that it will take a while after removal for the woman's body to adjust to getting pregnant.

Wait, wear a condom before having sex with my wife? Wait, am I missing something here?

Condom? With my wife? I dey craze? Tufiakwa!
Babe, I ain't wearing no stupid condoms that make sex life very unfair, and it's either you get on board and stay put, or you get the fück outta the way!

I mean, who likes/enjoys condoms even in relationships, let alone in marriage? I'd talk to my attorney then.

menabae:
The wife is just being cautious,family planning method is not good fr every woman's body,so is bound to fail to some extent, I think the condom is better...... my opinion thou

She can combine it with ovulation method. 10days from the onset of the menses, she can do without cd. 10 days in between, no show without cd and the last 10 days, they can do without cd. That combines with the family planning she has already done will keep her save and the husband happy also. Many are trying this method instead of chemical FP.

Tufanja:


This comment exactly illustrates why I wonder why Nigerian women are crazy about marriage. This is not a marriage but a prison. With as guard an immature man who thinks he can play husband.

If you frustrate a man, he can act like a not grown up child and respond in any possible way without even considering that he might be the cause of the frustration. But if you frustrate a woman...she should just shut up. #losersmentality

I like this. The last paragraph was apt. When a man is the problem all hands must be on deck to resolve it or he cheats but when the problem is the woman she's got no choice than to accept it and pray for her husband. A joke really.

newpisces:



With all due respect maam, are you married?

Who is the writer above.. talking to you @ Tufanja, you definetely are not married or if you are!!! you do not have an iota of what marriage entails.

Olodo end time wife.

Preciousgift25:
who knows? the lady might have seen some traces of unfaithfulness in his husband,so she may just try to use the issue of condom as an excuse. so don't blame her to we don't know wat actually happened

Then she should leave the man. period!!!

banmee:


There are other ways to prevent pregnancies. My wife had the procedure done. We did it before our first, second and now our third. In fact it can be so effective that it will take a while after removal for the woman's body to adjust to getting pregnant.

Exactly.

Tufanja:


This comment exactly illustrates why I wonder why Nigerian women are crazy about marriage. This is not a marriage but a prison. With as guard an immature man who thinks he can play husband.

If you frustrate a man, he can act like a not grown up child and respond in any possible way without even considering that he might be the cause of the frustration. But if you frustrate a woman...she should just shut up. #losersmentality

Whether you like it or not, the playing field is not equal. Society and Biology sets us apart. This is why in advanced society, women are given the benefit of a doubt and are protected more by the laws because men are seen as stronger and more capable of taking care of themselves, this has led to a society filled with inferior men. In the Nigerian context, it is the complete opposite, men are seen as the provider and if you fail your duties you are regarded as weak and castigated but if you fulfill them then the world is yours but in return the woman must be submissive either partially or totally. The tradition and cultural values remains in tact and women do not play victims! It has worked out so far as majority of Nigerian marriages last longer than those in advanced countries, you can call it suffering and smiling or you can attribute it to a backward society but you can't deny facts!

MirandaPrestly:



As a person who has been through three difficult pregnancies and three Caesarean sections, I understand why a woman would say "no more babies" and actually do something about it.
However, I think she should take a step further by studying her cycle for six months. That should be enough time to give her a good idea of how her body works. During her safe period, the CD isn't necessary. When she is unsafe, her husband should use it. It's only for a few days anyway. Like someone rightly said, no method is 100% effective. She isn't entirely wrong for wanting to be safe, but compromise is necessary in marriage. There has to be a middle ground somewhere, to reduce friction in the relationship.

Thanks for the input, glad you came and said all that, must have be hard and tough tho..

koko2000:

She can combine it with ovulation method. 10days from the onset of the menses, she can do without cd. 10 days in between, no show without cd and the last 10 days, they can do without cd. That combines with the family planning she has already done will keep her save and the husband happy also. Many are trying this method instead of chemical FP.

yea u are right,if only she will agree to that...... Most women dnt knw how to calculate their ovalation cycle that's the problem

HaneefahRN:
Na wa o. I hope this is just abt the fear of pregnancy. It's possible she doesn't trust the man or she has an infection herself, it myt just be d fear tho. If she is tht scared of getting pregnant let her go for tubal ligation and d husband for vasectomy if he agrees, so they can both continue enjoying themselves wt no fear.

now a reasonable person is talking here!!!!! I hail O!

Condom ke, no no no.



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