princessbee:
Hi mamas. Happy Easter. I am working on reapplying for my visa as I was denied some weeks back. I want to find out if there's a way I can book my flight with the choice of getting a refund so in case I. Don't get d visa. I intend to travel in June n I'm hearing fares are going to be expensive due to summer travels. Please anyone with useful info shud respond. Thanks

You don't need to book ticket dear, reapply and go for your interview on time. You will get affordable ticket by God's grace, it won't just be a straight flight.

happytbaby:
Let me answer Comfortina.

I think she really asked an honest question, I do not detect any sarcasm in her post. Life is a matter of perspectives.

Now to put things in perspective, let me start by saying my Maternal grandmother had 6 girls. One of them died from childbirth complications, the baby also died. One is 60 with no child and had two still births and one infant death, that makes 3 pregnancies. Another one is in her mid forties, she had twins which died after the hospital she registered in said they couldn't do CS. She herself is a twin. Her twin sister had two still births before a live one. 5days after the lifebirth, we realised she was incontinent. We took her to a specialist who had to perform another surgery to repair her bladder which had mistakenly been cut during the CS. It was my brother and I (teenagers) that were taking care of the new born while my Mum stayed with her in the hospital. She suffered mehn! Till date, she hasn't been able to carry another pregnancy to term.

Please can anybody help me count the number of dead children in my family and tell me the probability of such a high mortality rate if all 6 of my grandmother's girls lived in America?

About taxes, it's the children's choice, if they choose to settle in America they will pay their tax there. On double taxation, if you pay 20 percent here and 30 percent is your tax band in the US, it does not mean that you will pay 50 percent of your income as tax, there is a way it's calculated depending on the tax regime of the countries concerned. I will not be able to go into a lengthy explanation of that.

On the education, am wondering if you attended any of these federal universities you are talking about? My brother is attending a university abroad and when I help him look at his assignments I see that the difference between education here and there is like the distance between heaven and earth. Seriously, you get what you pay for.


Is it the sexual harassment you want to talk about or the countles strikes? Missing results or gross inefficiency?

Point of correction, grants are not paid back, it's student loans that have to be repaid and education in US is much cheaper for a citizen than an international student.Our problem is systemic.

My next question to you Comfortina: with all due respect, have you been to America? Because as you are asking for the benefits of being the citizen of a country where the system works.....Even to shop is easy, I wonder how many times I need to pick something from the market after work and my first headache would be 'where will I park?' Then 'how will I lug my little one in the market?' You can tell me there are malls but none of them is on my way. To go to common Yaba for bedspread or curtain sef na headache because of all the guys that will pull your arms asking you to patronize them.

Please, if we can afford it we shall give our kids the opportunity of having a choice of where they want to live. If I had one I am not sure I will be here. Just that I cannot live in obodo oyinbo as an illegal immigrant. However, first and foremost for me is the healthcare, I cannot come and allow one useless hospital give the people chasing my life negative home support with poor resources and negligent nurses that insult patients.

Happytbaby, I love you u know!

Abefeokin:


Happytbaby, I love you u know!

Oooooooh why did u steal my line before o dropped it
Happytbaby don't mind her! I love u pass Abefeokin! That analysis was just on point and kudos for seeing life simply without sarcasm.

Emmm Abefeokin I love u join o mae we no fight mbok

@Princessbee lemme join the train. Don't buy any ticket till after your application.Money too scarce to waste now.
If u get the visa I can help u search for cheap tickets. Promise.

princessbee:
Hi mamas in the house. Happy Easter. I am working on reapplying for my visa as I was denied some weeks back. Is there a way I can book a refundable flight for my travel which shud be in June, so that if I'm given d visa I won't pay for travel through my teeth cos it's summer time n I hear fares are more expensive.

Refundable tkts cost an arm n a leg and a few teeth. Not worth it

happytbaby:
Let me answer Comfortina.

I think she really asked an honest question, I do not detect any sarcasm in her post. Life is a matter of perspectives.

Now to put things in perspective, let me start by saying my Maternal grandmother had 6 girls. One of them died from childbirth complications, the baby also died. One is 60 with no child and had two still births and one infant death, that makes 3 pregnancies. Another one is in her mid forties, she had twins which died after the hospital she registered in said they couldn't do CS. She herself is a twin. Her twin sister had two still births before a live one. 5days after the lifebirth, we realised she was incontinent. We took her to a specialist who had to perform another surgery to repair her bladder which had mistakenly been cut during the CS. It was my brother and I (teenagers) that were taking care of the new born while my Mum stayed with her in the hospital. She suffered mehn! Till date, she hasn't been able to carry another pregnancy to term.

Please can anybody help me count the number of dead children in my family and tell me the probability of such a high mortality rate if all 6 of my grandmother's girls lived in America?

About taxes, it's the children's choice, if they choose to settle in America they will pay their tax there. On double taxation, if you pay 20 percent here and 30 percent is your tax band in the US, it does not mean that you will pay 50 percent of your income as tax, there is a way it's calculated depending on the tax regime of the countries concerned. I will not be able to go into a lengthy explanation of that.

On the education, am wondering if you attended any of these federal universities you are talking about? My brother is attending a university abroad and when I help him look at his assignments I see that the difference between education here and there is like the distance between heaven and earth. Seriously, you get what you pay for.


Is it the sexual harassment you want to talk about or the countles strikes? Missing results or gross inefficiency?

Point of correction, grants are not paid back, it's student loans that have to be repaid and education in US is much cheaper for a citizen than an international student.Our problem is systemic.

My next question to you Comfortina: with all due respect, have you been to America? Because as you are asking for the benefits of being the citizen of a country where the system works.....Even to shop is easy, I wonder how many times I need to pick something from the market after work and my first headache would be 'where will I park?' Then 'how will I lug my little one in the market?' You can tell me there are malls but none of them is on my way. To go to common Yaba for bedspread or curtain sef na headache because of all the guys that will pull your arms asking you to patronize them.

Please, if we can afford it we shall give our kids the opportunity of having a choice of where they want to live. If I had one I am not sure I will be here. Just that I cannot live in obodo oyinbo as an illegal immigrant. However, first and foremost for me is the healthcare, I cannot come and allow one useless hospital give the people chasing my life negative home support with poor resources and negligent nurses that insult patients.

u took the words right out of my mouth,i also had aunt that died minutes after giving birth,still today the hospital is not able to tell us the family what went wrong

regarding getting foods stuff or other items is just too easy,anything u think of buying is available to u,at different grades,u dnt need to go to sapel to buy something u can get a couple of streets away from u or order n av it delivered to u

the education is the best part,i did my masters in uk its one of the best educational experience of my life,just entering the library only will inspire u,or is the friendly open do policy of the lecturers, or the technology in place to make learning easy

if not that my hubby and family were in Nigeria, i WONT come back

happytbaby:
Let me answer Comfortina.

I think she really asked an honest question, I do not detect any sarcasm in her post. Life is a matter of perspectives.

Now to put things in perspective, let me start by saying my Maternal grandmother had 6 girls......

@happytbaby...infact u gave really cogent points and i can't say it any better. As for me, i see d 3-4m naira plus i am putting into childbirth now as an investment into my child's future: It caters for the excess my child would v had to spend if he/she decides to get healthcare as a foreigner in the US later in life, It caters for the excess he/she would have had to pay as an international student in the US later, It caters for covering the stress of getting a visa later in life ( and what if....what if by then visas are no longer granted to Nigerians)....and a whole lot more.

My bro, till tmrw, always feels sad when he remembers that he shld v been a US citizen enjoying some major benefits but my mum decided to go back to naija weeks before his delivery. I did my double masters in the US and i know how much i had to pay as an international student compared to my citizen n LPR sisters currently studying in the US. I have had the opportunity of studying both in naija and in the US and trust me, the difference is 7up even up to how people view you at interviews and organizations in naija when u present a naija cert and when u present a US cert.

I guess the point is if you don't have the means, don't sweat it BUT if u do, see it as giving your children options in future(they may or may not have need for it). Believe me, we all dont know tomorrow and our children might just always love us for this one decision we took for their benefit.

Hi Guys, I got a very sad call this morning. My cousin lost her 3 year old son yesterday. The little boy was playing in their compound with other kids, no-one knew when he left the compound and then stepped on a soak-away slab. The slab was not stable and he fell into the soak-away. Everyone gathered and tried to get him out but unfortunately he had swallowed and inhaled the waste. The poor boy died. I feel so sad and unhappy about this. Pls dear moms, try to be alert towards ur toddlers and kids, one split second can make a world of difference. This is the most heart breaking news I've ever heard Cos I have a 3 year old son myself. May God continue to protect us and our little ones from harm. Amen!

Thanks guys. Love you too right back. I can actually go on and on about health care and education here. Too many bad experiences. God should just grant us the resources and the visas.

My family's history with childbirth is so bad that I planned to deliver in US even before getting married.I dreaded childbirth. I started profiling myself as a tourist immediately I could afford it, went to Dubai, UK, schengen countries before my first US visa application, just to improve my chances, I took it very seriously.

I appreciate the fact that everyone of us on this thread is privileged though, because for each one of us here there are a hundred pregnant Nigerian women that do not have the opportunity we have. Ki Oluwa ma so wa (may God protect us)

Oh my! Oh my! May his gentle soul rest in the boss on of the Lord. This is so painful.

Petdaughter:
Hi Guys, I got a very sad call this morning. My cousin lost her 3 year old son yesterday. The little boy was playing in their compound with other kids, no-one knew when he left the compound and then stepped on a soak-away slab. The slab was not stable and he fell into the soak-away. Everyone gathered and tried to get him out but unfortunately he had swallowed and inhaled the waste. The poor boy died. I feel so sad and unhappy about this. Pls dear moms, try to be alert towards ur toddlers and kids, one split second can make a world of difference. This is the most heart breaking news I've ever heard Cos I have a 3 year old son myself. May God continue to protect us and our little ones from harm. Amen!

So sad! May God console the family.

[quote author=Petdaughter post=44100957]Hi Guys, I got a very sad call this morning. My cousin lost her 3 year old son yesterday. The little boy was playing in their compound with other kids, no-one knew when he left the compound and then stepped on a soak-away slab.

Happytbaby
You laid it out just as it is. I love you too. E-group hug.

Petdaughter:
Hi Guys, I got a very sad call this morning. My cousin lost her 3 year old son yesterday. The little boy was playing in their compound with other kids, no-one knew when he left the compound and then stepped on a soak-away slab. The slab was not stable and he fell into the soak-away. Everyone gathered and tried to get him out but unfortunately he had swallowed and inhaled the waste. The poor boy died. I feel so sad and unhappy about this. Pls dear moms, try to be alert towards ur toddlers and kids, one split second can make a world of difference. This is the most heart breaking news I've ever heard Cos I have a 3 year old son myself. May God continue to protect us and our little ones from harm. Amen!

Awww . May God console your cousin. It is well with you.

missexiest:
Pls can anyone help with names of banks selling pta here in abuja plssss.Thanks n God bless

Unity & Jaiz, 100% confam! Told someone casually, who later informed me both approved ...

All the best.






Petdaughter,

Only God can comfort the parents, so sad...

happytbaby:
Thanks guys. Love you too right back. I can actually go on and on about health care and education here. Too many bad experiences. God should just grant us the resources and the visas.

My family's history with childbirth is so bad that I planned to deliver in US even before getting married.I dreaded childbirth. I started profiling myself as a tourist immediately I could afford it, went to Dubai, UK, schengen countries before my first US visa application, just to improve my chances, I took it very seriously.

I appreciate the fact that everyone of us on this thread is privileged though, because for each one of us here there are a hundred pregnant Nigerian women that do not have the opportunity we have. Ki Oluwa ma so wa (may God protect us)

I totally agree with you.I remember on my honeymoon when I wasn't even thinking about pregnancy for my first child. We flew Qatar airways and had a 19 hours 30 minutes stop over. Before booking we called their customer care and they said they give transit visas to people with layovers longer than 7 hours so we bought with the plan that we would get a hotel in town and sleep for a while before our second leg of the flight.

When we arrived Qatar they were truly giving people transit visas so we joined the queue. We got to the front of the queue and they said 'we don't give transit visas to Nigerian passport holders'. The humiliation we felt in that moment ehn, words cannot explain it. If my child never has to face passport or visa humiliation alone, I've given them a priceless gift with which they can have the world at their feet. Not to talk of all the other benefits.

Petdaughter:
Hi Guys, I got a very sad call this morning. My cousin lost her 3 year old son yesterday. The little boy was playing in their compound with other kids, no-one knew when he left the compound and then stepped on a soak-away slab. The slab was not stable and he fell into the soak-away. Everyone gathered and tried to get him out but unfortunately he had swallowed and inhaled the waste. The poor boy died. I feel so sad and unhappy about this. Pls dear moms, try to be alert towards ur toddlers and kids, one split second can make a world of difference. This is the most heart breaking news I've ever heard Cos I have a 3 year old son myself. May God continue to protect us and our little ones from harm. Amen!

May God grant him eternal rest and comfort his parents and loved ones.

One can never be too careful with toddlers. May God continue to give us strength to take care of the kids he has gifted to us.

happytbaby:
Let me answer Comfortina.

I think she really asked an honest question, I do not detect any sarcasm in her post. Life is a matter of perspectives.

Now to put things in perspective, let me start by saying my Maternal grandmother had 6 girls. One of them died from childbirth complications, the baby also died. One is 60 with no child and had two still births and one infant death, that makes 3 pregnancies. Another one is in her mid forties, she had twins which died after the hospital she registered in said they couldn't do CS. She herself is a twin. Her twin sister had two still births before a live one. 5days after the lifebirth, we realised she was incontinent. We took her to a specialist who had to perform another surgery to repair her bladder which had mistakenly been cut during the CS. It was my brother and I (teenagers) that were taking care of the new born while my Mum stayed with her in the hospital. She suffered mehn! Till date, she hasn't been able to carry another pregnancy to term.

Please, if we can afford it we shall give our kids the opportunity of having a choice of where they want to live. If I had one I am not sure I will be here. Just that I cannot live in obodo oyinbo as an illegal immigrant. However, first and foremost for me is the healthcare, I cannot come and allow one useless hospital give the people chasing my life negative home support with poor resources and negligent nurses that insult patients.

I like this write up, does well highlighting some of the pros for giving birth in the US focusing mainly on healthcare which you can probably get from any other well developed country. I think however for the original poster if you are undecided about birthing in the US you need to review both Pros and cons and make a well educated decision. I will try to list some of both and I am sure others will add where I missed.

Pros for birthing and if the child decides to come back and stay
1.Better Healthcare
2.Better Education
3.Country that has a system that works (Laws, govt, amenities, economy, etc)
4.More Jobs/opportunities for career advancement
5.Better resources/way of life
6.Better Financial/Economic System- Easier access to Loans, funding etc
7.Independence - Children in America learn independence early. See this also a con cos once they are independent some kids tend to start to think they are at the same level with their parents


Cons
1.Expensive healthcare
2.Expensive Education/Childcare (Infant - early teen and college)
3.Bills Bills Bills (You pay a lot for all of the "Better" highlighted in the Pros and if you are not careful/not disciplined may run into a bad financial state)
4.Depending on where you live, no social/community feeling with your own tribe/culture (may also be a pro for some people that want to stay away from the Nigerian drama in most states)
5.Exposure to social practices that we don't want our kids involved in (Drugs, etc)
6.Will just call this "Differences in what the US govt calls child abuse and what we call discipline"
7.Higher Taxes

Again you would need to consider all pros and cons and decide why you REALLY want to birth in the US. Are you doing it just for a better health care system? Are doing it so your child does not need a visa to the US and some other countries? Are you doing this so your child can come back to the US for a better education/Job opportunities? Would it be better if you spend that money creating opportunities for your child in Nigeria?

One more point to consider is that it is much more difficult for someone who has spent all most of their life outside of the US to come back and integrate into the US. A lot of people I know struggled with this but with the right mentors/advice they were able to integrate into the system and get good jobs.Most had to go back to school, some even had to start from scratch.

If you have the funds definitely go for it, but make sure you understand fully what you are getting into.

DEAR I AM NOT SURE ABOUT THAT. BUT MAYBE YOU CAN CONTACT DR M - 1500 FOR VD AND 2500 FOR CS. THEN DEPENDING ON THE HOSPITAL ,IT IS 2700 0R 3000 FOR VD AND 3700 OR 5000 FOR CS. NOT SURE IF THEY ACCEPT FORM A, YOU MIGHT HAVE TO CALL THEM.

toitoi:
@tjelta please do use form A for hospital and doctors fee.

Thanks for your response, You are a darling .
I will contact them as soon as possible.

tjelta:
DEAR I AM NOT SURE ABOUT THAT. BUT MAYBE YOU CAN CONTACT DR M - 1500 FOR VD AND 2500 FOR CS. THEN DEPENDING ON THE HOSPITAL ,IT IS 2700 0R 3000 FOR VD AND 3700 OR 5000 FOR CS. NOT SURE IF THEY ACCEPT FORM A, YOU MIGHT HAVE TO CALL THEM.

May the Lord keep his family and grant them fortitude to bear the loss

Petdaughter:
Hi Guys, I got a very sad call this morning. My cousin lost her 3 year old son yesterday. The little boy was playing in their compound with other kids, no-one knew when he left the compound and then stepped on a soak-away slab. The slab was not stable and he fell into the soak-away. Everyone gathered and tried to get him out but unfortunately he had swallowed and inhaled the waste. The poor boy died. I feel so sad and unhappy about this. Pls dear moms, try to be alert towards ur toddlers and kids, one split second can make a world of difference. This is the most heart breaking news I've ever heard Cos I have a 3 year old son myself. May God continue to protect us and our little ones from harm. Amen!

vamum:


I like this write up, does well highlighting some of the pros for giving birth in the US focusing mainly on healthcare which you can probably get from any other well developed country. I think however for the original poster if you are undecided about birthing in the US you need to review both Pros and cons and make a well educated decision. I will try to list some of both and I am sure others will add where I missed.

Pros for birthing and if the child decides to come back and stay
1.Better Healthcare
2.Better Education
3.Country that has a system that works (Laws, govt, amenities, economy, etc)
4.More Jobs/opportunities for career advancement
5.Better resources/way of life
6.Better Financial/Economic System- Easier access to Loans, funding etc
7.Independence - Children in America learn independence early. See this also a con cos once they are independent some kids tend to start to think they are at the same level with their parents

CNN mentions the top 3 reason's as

1. Higher standard of living than most countries
2. More Financial Security and Stability than most countries
3. Less risk than most countries.

happytbaby:
Let me answer Comfortina.

I think she really asked an honest question, I do not detect any sarcasm in her post. Life is a matter of perspectives.

Now to put things in perspective, let me start by saying my Maternal grandmother had 6 girls. One of them died from childbirth complications, the baby also died. One is 60 with no child and had two still births and one infant death, that makes 3 pregnancies. Another one is in her mid forties,

Its like you have time to waste by answering that kind of nonsense questions. You shouldnt have replied the question,because some people are just enemy of progress who are looking for some people to discourage,if not, how can someone in his or her right senses,after seeing the current situation of things in NIG now, and still asks whats the benefits of birthing in the USA and being an American Shmmm!!

To Him all Praise and Glory is returned to, i say thank you God.

I had my beautiful baby today at Oakbend Medical Center

I spent less than 2 hours for the entire dilation and pushing process.

Faithful is our God.

May our joy never cease and everyone believing God for something great and good, i pray the Lord will deliver it to you this season in Jesus Christ name, Amen.

God bless you @oczy you have always been a sister, i appreciate.

Happy Easter everyone.

Austine2020:
Its like you have time to waste by answering that kind of nonsense questions. You shouldnt have replied the question,because some people are just enemy of progress who are looking for some people to discourage,if not, how can someone in his or her right senses,after seeing the current situation of things in NIG now, and still asks whats the benefits of birthing in the USA and being an American Shmmm!!

Please don't call somebody's questions nonsense. The poster actually made valid points. Another Person Made a list of pros and cons. Yes there are cons to birthing in the US just like everything else in life.
U just put both on an imaginary scale and pick one side. If people called your questions back then nonsense u wudnt have been returning here

Awwww....this is so sad. May God grant your families fortitude to bear the loss! It is well!!

Petdaughter:
Hi Guys, I got a very sad call this morning. My cousin lost her 3 year old son yesterday. The little boy was playing in their compound with other kids, no-one knew when he left the compound and then stepped on a soak-away slab. The slab was not stable and he fell into the soak-away. Everyone gathered and tried to get him out but unfortunately he had swallowed and inhaled the waste. The poor boy died. I feel so sad and unhappy about this. Pls dear moms, try to be alert towards ur toddlers and kids, one split second can make a world of difference. This is the most heart breaking news I've ever heard Cos I have a 3 year old son myself. May God continue to protect us and our little ones from harm. Amen!

Hian...na Fyt?

Austine2020:
Its like you have time to waste by answering that kind of nonsense questions. You shouldnt have replied the question,because some people are just enemy of progress who are looking for some people to discourage,if not, how can someone in his or her right senses,after seeing the current situation of things in NIG now, and still asks whats the benefits of birthing in the USA and being an American Shmmm!!

God bless you Happytbaby and all that responded to comfortina's question. As stupid as the question might be to many, it's actually one that has been on my mind for some time now but I didn't ask for fear of insults cos I thought most people here wouldn't be objective in answering.

I've always thought there are huge benefits in birthing in the US ,however, my only concern has been whether my children will take advantage of the benefits. For instance, in terms of the educational system, it's only the university education I think my children will benefit cos I don't see my family moving there which is what can make my children go through the entire educational system.

In the end, depending on what you want, it's different strokes for different folks.

Pricelessamzy:


May our joy never cease and everyone believing God for something great and good, i pray the Lord will deliver it to you this season in Jesus Christ name, Amen.

God bless you @oczy you have always been a sister, i appreciate.

Happy Easter everyone.

Where you trying to mention me?

Congratulations and may GOD bless and keep your LO amen.

So sorry about your loss @ petdaugther.
Am sure that soak away has been bad like Dat for some time and dey didn't repay it, and I guess they will repair it now that it have taken somebody's life mtchewww.

@ozycy no be like that o! Sometimes these soakaways are just the result of terrible contractors. U will be living in a new house and be feeling funky, next thing one wall or the other just gives in.
My husband stepped on the soakaway of our former house and the thing just collapsed. Na out of giri giri e take hold onto the walls with em legs and hands for dear life o! Nobody was there o! This was a house that was less than 4 years old. So na just to dey pray against nonsense and ingridents occurrences.
@petdaugter I don't even know how to say sorry o but sorry to to your people o.

LadyGuinivere:
@ozycy no be like that o! Sometimes these soakaways are just the result of terrible contractors. U will be living in a new house and be feeling funky, next thing one wall or the other just gives in.
My husband stepped on the soakaway of our former house and the thing just collapsed. Na out of giri giri e take hold onto the walls with em legs and hands for dear life o! Nobody was there o! This was a house that was less than 4 years old. So na just to dey pray against nonsense and ingridents occurrences.
@petdaugter I don't even know how to say sorry o but sorry to to your people o.

Na so I nearly fall enter soak away in my papa house sef in 2009. The think just caved in!!! Na God de save person o! Hummnn

Helo June/ July mamas any one travelling in may? Pls reply... Thank you