₦airaland Forum

OrangeDream:
All rants!! No substance.. You've become a woman without substance.. This is your life happening to you right now

:
Such an irrelevant person!

Long distance relationships are relationships that two partners can't see each other based on things they do or place they live..

I started dating a girl since 2012 due to one or two things we quarrelled a few times (not without settling o)

She moved to portharcourt in 2014 and from then on it was long distance. Here's what i learnt.
1. Look calling each other isn't that good because the urge to see him/her increases thereby you miss them a lot. (personal experience)
2. Keep each other in your mind at ALL times. Yes. Trust me it works. Just have the faith that you guys are still together and your current predicament is just for a while.
What of me wae dae for airforce. How i for do?
Finally, BE LOYAL AND PRAYERFUL. It makes you more courageous.

Signed
Perfectdanny

layla129:
It can be really frustrating and boring at a point i tell you but a distant relationship that survives only grows stronger. I'll share some of my personal tips from experience with you which has helped and is still keeping us going.
1. Visit each other; if you're lucky to be in the same country, visit each other. And if in different countries, still visit. Spend time and money on travels.

2. Video calls/ chats; being able to see each other regularly and talking about EVERYTHING develops intimacy. Send photos, take shots specifically for him.

3. Make an effort and be determined to make things work; if he's a very busy dude like mine, my sister you have to really try. U jst have to pin him down to get things sorted. The longer issues linger, the gap becomes wider.

4. Keep yourself busy; focus on your life too, develop yourself... apart from the personal benefits you gain from this, it tends to take your mind off the thoughts of him for a while. And i'm sure he'll even respect u more for that.

5. Set some rules; in my case, i made it a standard that we should never sleep over a disagreement. We must settle it before it before we both go to bed...i've gone to bed 3am on an occassion because we just had to straighten out things.
We know each other's schedule for the whole day

6.talk dirty to each other and be very romantic; you know what to do
Plus, tell him when you're angry or unhappy about anything because he is not with you physically to see your expressions.

These are the ones i remember for now, i hope they were helpful? Hang in there sis

thanks for this.
I initially thought am too emotional or weird because this is exactly the way I relate with my lady. you gave a perfect description of my relationship, just that we've not been able to visit each other, but we do others.

sex chat, phn sex, dirty talks . . . .
distance broke my 4years + relationshp but dnt mind those dat says it cnt work, i dnt bliv dat
anything can work if u rili want it to

4nobody4every1:
Hahaha, this your question mark is cracking me up, chai, Nairaland Una go kee person with laugh, is like it was an off contribution from the dude.Lol

As inn !!!

I don't know the cave he sprang out from.

He was soo off the topic.

I just tire for some NLanders sha.
# good morning .

Josephamstrong1:
u mean they've stopped midnyt calls?
since wen abeg? abi na stl dey April fool?
Was banned by MTN, we juz like cat and rat.

Last month
Lol! NCC effect

EggovinMma:
It's not easy believe me.I have broken off mine several times than I can count because of the consistent fights.Its quite a challenge but I believe what will be will be.

Until you erase this deadly phrase; "what will be will be", from your heart, it'll cause you more harm than good! You don't have to accept everything(particularly, negative ones)that comes your way hook, line and sinker, as a Child of God(that's if you are anyway). Why on earth will you startup an unnecessary quarrels? Why will you decide to make life unbearable for him? Must you use abusive words on him, even while he does? What type of home do you plan to have? You are the owner of the home as a woman. You determine how peaceful and romantic your union will be. You hold the key into his heart in your hand. Come on, wise up and use your power to your advantage!

Rooneyboy:
As inn !!!

I don't know the cave he sprang out from.

He was soo off the topic.

I just tire for some NLanders sha.
# good morning .

Lol @ the bold, good morning

Alani86:
Until you erase this deadly phrase; "what will be will be", from your heart, it'll cause you more harm than good! You don't have to accept everything(particularly, negative ones)that comes your way hook, line and sinker, as a Child of God(that's if you are anyway). Why on earth will you startup an unnecessary quarrels? Why will you decide to make life unbearable for him? Must you use abusive words on him, even while he does? What type of home do you plan to have? You are the owner of the home as a woman. You determine how peaceful and romantic your union will be. You hold the key into his heart in your hand. Come on, wise up and use your power to your advantage!

I don't make life unbearable for him, and if i use abusive words on him, I suggests he tries another. That's if he can't stand me. I don't hold the keys to any man's heart, because I can't stand that idea.I only accept those that impress me and not the other way round.

[quote author=Flamezreal post=44357555]I see trust lacking in the relationship. Or better still what has he asked you to do that you're not doing?[/quote

I don't think we have a trust issue because I'm transparent in what I'm doing and I trust him 100%

Fulaman198:
@fulanigirl, sey munyal! It's always important to have patience as it is a virtue. As someone mentioned earlier, try to hit him up on video calls, smile demonstrate your charm and happiness. Talk in a positive manner. If he starts getting angry for no apparent reason, simply ask him why has his tone of voice changed towards you? No need for 2 people to get upset at one another, be the bigger person. Show that you are a mature lady and ready for marriage. Remember, you are no longer the "fulanigirl", you are now the "fulanilady".

Thank you. What you said above is what I struggle with the most. I am very stubborn and give in to my angry emotions instead of taking the higher road. Patience is a wonderful but difficult virtue to master

RadicallyBlunt:
Shebi u knw as una dey do am. U go gossipally find one gossip informant as friend mounted around where he stays to dey give u info as he dey flex. Abi no be so?

that how u people go about sowing seed of disgust. Instead of meaningful advice ur talking this one.

Alani86:
The simple truth is; whatever God had destined to happen will happen; Even if you are apart for ten years. Seeing each other daily for 8 years doesn't mean you'll end up getting married to each other. And a union that has focus/vision will look beyond whatever barrier(distance/misunderstanding/bad reports from haters, etc). Must you be canal to uphold a relationship; "talk dirty"? I've seen some senseless girls who had turned themselves into sex machine while trying to "satisfy" their men, with the view to keeping the relationship alive. And eventually they were dumped like a sac of dirts. Let me share my story at this junction;

By the grace of God, I met my jewel while she was about entering 100L(LAUTECH, Physiology). I finished from the same school(Accounting). It took me 6months to gain her love; I didn't give up because she got my attention with her virtues/inner beauty! We were used to each other because a day hardly went without seeing each other. I was ahead of her but took some semesters out from school, plus some flaws, so we eventually finished the same year. I'm sure you would ask; 100L ke? How did she cope with her studies? And even me? Well, that's where focus/vision comes in. By the mercy of God, she finished with a strong 2:1(one of the best in her dept) and I also finished with 2:1(but not as strong as hers)

We finished early last year and in May she had to travel. We didn't see each other till around October when she came for her clearance(2/3days). Then, she traveled to Kebbi for NYSC(October 23rd, stream 1). I was posted to Rivers stream 2. Honestly, I'll encourage you to develop yourself and get as many virtues as possible. Facial beauty can get you into a man's heart, but character/attitude/virtue will retain you therein. Let me come out straight to you here; it takes a man/woman who had decided to honor God with his/her life/body/time/future/heart(through the Help of His Spirit), to stay focused and keep the bed "undefiled". A good and precious lady don't have to maneuver/work herself into the man's heart. Even bad boys advised me never to let her go. She ad done several things for me and it becomes practically impossible for me to stop thinking about her. She's always fresh in my heart. A girl that fasted and prayed for me(on several occasions)to get closer to my creator? A girl that stood with me when it looked as if I can never become anything in life? A girl who turned working class down, because she had decided to give her heart to a guy who has no bearing? A girl who fed me for several semesters and gave me money on uncountable occasions? A girl who took breathtaking risks for me?

The question is; what will your man remember you for? Just your big breast/sexy boot? Do you know how many girls flaunt them around him? Is it the artificial face(bombarded with pancakes)? Is it different styles in bed that only 500H can give him where he is? Is it sexy voice that even an illiterate can give? Or has your physical beauty/stature or intelligence and family background getting into your head and making you pompous/heady? No sensible man(who are kings in the making) ever give their loyalty and life in to such "chicks". Rather, they give it to ladies who are fashioned after the manner of a palace. Ladies with womb(to take and conceive issues, without spreading it around), ladies with respect and dignity, ladies with inner beauty(that talks with wisdom). The little times we kissed each other, I forced her to do it. Since we started,even while I slept in her room(before I could get another place to stay) we never had sex. I was a bad guy and she knew, yet, she stood with me and insisted I was going to become a vessel in God's hand. To God be the Glory, I have decided completely for JESUS!

Wonderful, she sounds like a gem

fartkay:
.


As if u know what's on my mind. Am in it too right now. We spend at least two hours on day time call n at least three hours midnight call. We do all that it takes to get closer dou wide apart. Funniest thing is that she is a deeper life member bo talks dirty just to keep d relationship glowing.

"Funniest thing is that she is a deeper life member bo talks dirty just to keep d relationship glowing."; this sounded funny to you right? You just made a public ridicule of her. You seem to be rejoicing in iniquity and that's so terrible. I'm not holy though(I only rely on His Grace, Nature and Spirit). But, I think you need to both go to God and ask for forgiveness before it's too late. And please, stop promoting darkness, and don't drag innocent souls along with you, in case you want to be adamant and at logger heads with your Creator.


If God could save and help me to this point(and ever), He can do the same for you(depending on how remorseful you are). The vilest offender who truly believes, that moment from Jesus a pardon receives!

EggovinMma:
:
Such an irrelevant person!

Of course i totally agree with you...We are saying the same thing dear.. Been a woman without substance is the same thing as been irrelevant.. In your own words, you are irrelevant.
Thank you for yet, another subtle translation from you

Long distance relationship is the best, it takes trust, commitment, communication and understanding.

OrangeDream:
Of course i totally agree with you...We are saying the same thing dear.. Been a woman without substance is the same thing as been irrelevant.. In your own words, you are irrelevant.
Thank you for yet, another subtle translation from you

You're giving me too much attention. I hate it! The relevance you're giving to me (a woman without substance) is quite irritating. Maybe you should stop.

dayosweetness:
what kind of senseless advice is dis one??

call it senseless or whatever its the bitter truth, for you to love your woman very much, your attention must be there both body and soul, not some stupid night calls that will destroy the productivity of the day. No matter how much you try to improve it, you are missing and thats the fact

mizlovette:
that how u people go about sowing seed of disgust. Instead of meaningful advice ur talking this one.

Why not just advice d op if u're an advice genius. I wrote what I know from experience.

domopps:
Discover what works 4 him and explore it!
Must she tell you everything..........

When you have a d!ck close to ur clict does anyone tells you where to put it.....sorry had 2 say that but not my usual way

All the best!
Cheeeeeers

Thanks lovie but den I 'm not d OP!
Only asked should in a case I meet someone who needs ma advice on such

Cc: Layla129

Communication is very crucial.buy a CUG line to ensure free flow of intimacy i.e unlimited calls and sms.if you need it; call 08064182369:

fulanigirl:
I need some help on how to keep my long distance relationship alive. We've been together for almost 2 years, the first year we were in the same city but he moved away almost a year ago. We've been fighting so much and with our wedding next July it's worrying. I was hoping I can get some ideas on keeping the romance in our relationship.

sister you need to pray hard oooo, because I am still in pains right now this Easter she gave me red card. All in the name of distance... pls pray hard oooo

I will advice you to sit and talk to him about it,so that you both can work a way out..communication is the key.

Alani86:
"Funniest thing is that she is a deeper life member bo talks dirty just to keep d relationship glowing."; this sounded funny to you right? You just made a public ridicule of her. You seem to be rejoicing in iniquity and that's so terrible. I'm not holy though(I only rely on His Grace, Nature and Spirit). But, I think you need to both go to God and ask for forgiveness before it's too late. And please, stop promoting darkness, and don't drag innocent souls along with you, in case you want to be adamant and at logger heads with your Creator.


If God could save and help me to this point(and ever), He can do the same for you(depending on how remorseful you are). The vilest offender who truly believes, that moment from Jesus a pardon receives!

U re right dou, u might be define it ur own way (being dirty) bo I know wat I mean as well as she knows d kind of dirty talk she can engage me with. Am not promoting iniquity, and am not ridiculing her standard and profile, am only expressing d length you can go to save a distance relationship. Mind u its on her desk, d lady must do all that it takes to maintain and sustain her relationship. Just any means. Mind u I mean no harm

Alani86:
"Funniest thing is that she is a deeper life member bo talks dirty just to keep d relationship glowing."; this sounded funny to you right? You just made a public ridicule of her. You seem to be rejoicing in iniquity and that's so terrible. I'm not holy though(I only rely on His Grace, Nature and Spirit). But, I think you need to both go to God and ask for forgiveness before it's too late. And please, stop promoting darkness, and don't drag innocent souls along with you, in case you want to be adamant and at logger heads with your Creator.


If God could save and help me to this point(and ever), He can do the same for you(depending on how remorseful you are). The vilest offender who truly believes, that moment from Jesus a pardon receives!

U re right dou, u might ve define it ur own way (being dirty) bo I know wat I mean as well as she knows d kind of dirty talk she can engage me with. Am not promoting iniquity, and am not ridiculing her standard and profile, am only expressing d length you can go to save a distance relationship. Mind u its on her desk, d lady must do all that it takes to maintain and sustain her relationship. Just any means. Mind u I mean no harm

EggovinMma:
You're giving me too much attention. I hate it! The relevance you're giving to me (a woman without substance) is quite irritating. Maybe you should stop.

No substance.. You are empty.. Truly empty

Layla you are totally correct. Mine has been 4yrs now. We do have problems but whenever the problems arise, always try to sort things out immediately. It helps a lot. And b very romantic, tease him with romantic words, tell him how much u miss him. Whenever am cooking delicious meal, I always inform him, telling him what he is missing at home. And when he complains about wanting to eat my good. The answer will always be, if u really want to eat,then come back home. Always remind him what he is missing at home. And also don't complain too much. Encourage him to always do well.

pweetychyka:
Thanks lovie but den I 'm not d OP!
Only asked should in a case I meet someone who needs ma advice on such

Cc: Layla129

Alright dear...spread the word

layla129:
Alright dear...spread the word

Thanks lovie

Enjoy the rest of your day

nuggarito:
no matter how you profess your love, or improve it, once you are not present, there's nothing happening. Maybe one day she calls and you are not picking up due to certain but important reasons , she would certainly have trust issues. Man is insatiable, you have to be present there to build the foundation (my opinion shaa)

Yes, your opinion it is.

layla129:
It can be really frustrating and boring at a point i tell you but a distant relationship that survives only grows stronger. I'll share some of my personal tips from experience with you which has helped and is still keeping us going.
1. Visit each other; if you're lucky to be in the same country, visit each other. And if in different countries, still visit. Spend time and money on travels.

2. Video calls/ chats; being able to see each other regularly and talking about EVERYTHING develops intimacy. Send photos, take shots specifically for him.

3. Make an effort and be determined to make things work; if he's a very busy dude like mine, my sister you have to really try. U jst have to pin him down to get things sorted. The longer issues linger, the gap becomes wider.

4. Keep yourself busy; focus on your life too, develop yourself... apart from the personal benefits you gain from this, it tends to take your mind off the thoughts of him for a while. And i'm sure he'll even respect u more for that.

5. Set some rules; in my case, i made it a standard that we should never sleep over a disagreement. We must settle it before it before we both go to bed...i've gone to bed 3am on an occassion because we just had to straighten out things.
We know each other's schedule for the whole day

6.talk dirty to each other and be very romantic; you know what to do
Plus, tell him when you're angry or unhappy about anything because he is not with you physically to see your expressions.

These are the ones i remember for now, i hope they were helpful? Hang in there sis

If only my ex knew some of these things we would pea ahoy still be together

OrangeDream:
No substance.. You are empty.. Truly empty

Keep masturbating with your thoughts.