₦airaland Forum

KAYD007:
You are so pathetic!! In your warped mind, the man must have done some thing bad to warrant this from his wife.....imagine..what did you do your wife

vicchi12:
I'll forgive your ignorance.

quivah:
as a counselor yourself, you think his advice on this thread is any thing to go by?

I think not!

ephi123:
I really do hope OP is okay, he hasn't been online since 9.32am this morning.

Ronke001:
It's obviously an emergency moniker
Registered on 4th July
He's probably still viewing the thread with his moniker

Silvofitz:
Divorce her. Face d reality, d marriage is over already. Medically, you're good to go with one testis. So, don't let anyone intimidate you with that. You might be surprised the family already has another man for her. Even if u forgive her, she would do worse, and your life is at stake.
I remember a friend of mine, who met a corper and married her as a medical student. Along the line, the family started putting her under pressure to divorce the medical student and marry a richer guy. Funny enough, the medical student was able to manage the home because he's scholarship worth about #400k per session. This lady began to cheat, and the guy caught her red-handed many times. But for the love he had for her and their only son, the guy forgave her. This lady began to plot with her sisters on how to get another man. The guy got to know, and felt the marriage was over. They went their separate ways. Up till now the lady lives in regrets. All those men promising marriage only used her and dumped her. It was the same lady who wrote a proposal letter to the musician, BankyW , claiming God revealed to her thrice that God said he's her husband. In fact, she takes the name of any man who approaches her now to pastors and diviners. She's so desperate now. Don't waste your energy on her. Let her go. She would live to regret her actions!

vicadex07:
Wow... this is serious. I can vividly remember that banky w story.

Silvofitz:
The lady's case is so critical now. She's so desperate. If a man greets her, and by chance tell her his name, the following day she would take the name to her pastors and diviners for verification. She's actually confused.

frozenSun:
BBM.?

vicadex07:
She is gradually going bonkers.

Elle277:
From way back all is well with the two of you, she even stood by you during the hard times, devil don't like it when there is peace, so he had to use the jealous sisters to wanna destroy your marriage..probably there is no love in their marriages and they want to destroy your naive wifes own..pls don't divorce her.. just play those recordings to her and see her next reactions,, talk to her, advice her, she will def come back to her senses and you will see how those devil agents will run away from your home..bros the devil you know is better than the saint you will remarry in future...she is not a bad wife, she's just a naive one that needs some talking..you have a great fam,, and all that has bn happening is temptation, you've win one(both of you during your health challenge) now you guys have to put this set of devils were they belong,,pls try cos its only you that will make it happen through your decision...my humble opinion!

Silvofitz:
At a point we thought she's a nympho. After, the BankyW's saga, in May 11-14, 2016, she had tried two other guys. And she can see revelations.. .
A pastor friend who's one of her spiritual consultants said he was tired of her numerous revelations. They all warned her to keep to her first marriage but her sisters mis-led her. Now she's confused.
Funny enough she's a member of MFM, the haven of deliverance. As she claimed in her proposal letter to BankyW, she's even a worker in Drama Unit of the church.

DevGuru:
This is just to assure all Nairalanders on this thread that I am still standing. There have been further developments which I can't type now because my phone battery is low. I'll update all you wonderful ladies and gentlemen as soon as I get home. Cheers

DevGuru:
This is just to assure all Nairalanders on this thread that I am still standing. There have been further developments which I can't type now because my phone battery is low. I'll update all you wonderful ladies and gentlemen as soon as I get home. Cheers

DevGuru:
This is just to assure all Nairalanders on this thread that I am still standing. There have been further developments which I can't type now because my phone battery is low. I'll update all you wonderful ladies and gentlemen as soon as I get home. Cheers

sweetilicious:
Exactly my point. She is the last born and she is naive about relating with people. I don't think she is a bad person. She just happened to have damaged sisters around her whom still sees her as their little girl. Unfortunately, her sisters won't tell her the good side of their marriages. She is just being deceived. Her brain needs resetting and it could only be done by the husband but not with force. After the family meeting, i believe she will start minding her family just as others. Families that are close to each other is a sweet one but when they don't support with mending issues, they should be at arms length.

sexy74:
don't bring the devil into this, what she did was pretty meditated and not impromptu .
my advice is thread softly with her and never trust her with anything.
I. you want to tell her anything let i5 be half truth.

buksaylor001:
Did you comprehend at all?

DevGuru:
NOTICE: Please, my story is still very long despite that I tried very hard to remove some unnecessary portions. But if you can be patient to read it to the end, then you are ready to give a mature opinion.

I am a Yoruba guy married to another Yoruba lady who happened to be the last of seven children. We met at the University and had a long courtship before we got married in 2014. I loved her so much and I believe she loved me too. We were each other's best friends. Shortly before we began to plan the wedding, on one faithful afternoon, I was watching the TV in my living room when I began to feel a slight pain in my lower abdomen. It got more intense within few hours and I had to go to a nearby hospital and by that time, the pain was inside my scrotum. The young doctor there didn't understand what was wrong and started injecting me with pain killers. I was kept there till midnight. The next morning, I noticed that one of my testicle was swelling up. I hen went to a teaching hospital where Orchitis was first diagnosed. After a week of antibiotics with no improvement, a consultant examined me and said it was torsion which should have been surgically corrected within few hours from the onset of the pain. As at that time, the testicle was dead. I had to go for surgery to have the dead one removed. My wife (then my fiancé) was with me in the hospital. She assured me that everything would be fine and that we could have as many kids as we wanted with just one left. I loved her the more.

Now we have a very beautiful daughter who obviously has my genes and delights everyone around her with her alluring beauty. We nearly lost her to a strange illness some months back but for God who used my mum to restore our daughter. That's another long story but not for this thread. My mum loves my family so much that even my wife knows that she can lay down her life for us to be fine. Since we got married, my wife hasn't worked owing partly to our daughter's health which is now very perfect. It's not been easy for me working day and night to feed the family and paying bills in a 3-bedroom apartment in Lagos but God has been helping us. My wife was so much loved in my family that people around thought she was my mum's daughter. Very hardworking and homely.

A little into her own family setup too... She has 4 female and 2 male siblings. All her siblings are married but very close to the parents. Because my wife and I were very close, I was aware of most of the happenings in their family, but I never even gave any thought to them on how they might affect my own marriage.... long story...

Last month, I repeatedly got home late due to an official event which I told my wife and I was talking to her on phone. One morning, she gave me a wild look and warned me never to come late again. I quickly noticed the strangeness in her actions and I comported myself by saying "I'm sorry, it won't happen again". We ate together and I left for work. I returned much earlier and was with her and my daughter for a couple of hours before went to bed after I told her I had a meeting the next morning.

When I woke up, I checked the time and realised I was running late. I greeted her and rushed out of the bed only for her to jump up too and say "We need to talk". Go on, I replied... Then she claimed she observed that I've been cold towards her since she tried to correct me the previous day. I denied it but she insisted, so I told her I would adjust and that I had nothing against her. She suddenly jumped at me and said I was going nowhere. I was very surprised as I asked her what was wrong with her. I begged her to let me go and if we had to discuss anything further, it could be later in the day after work. She grew wilder and began to abuse me verbally. I drew her out of my way so I could go have my bath and she grabbed my singlet and tore it down. I was shocked! I then grabbed her two hands and pushed her to sit on the bed. She just jumped up and said "this is what I've been waiting for". She rushed to her phone and called my dad. Immediately my dad answered the call, she suddenly began to cry saying "your son has been beating me since we woke up today"... It was like I was watching a nollywood movie. I looked like a poor citizen who had no money to eat but just got an allegation that EFCC had traced N1.4b to his account. My Dad called me immediately and ordered me to leave the house first before anything. Immediately, she called my mum too and said the same thing. My mum called me and began to cry that she never expected I would disgrace the family in such manner. I was sad and even had to shout at her cos she wouldn't let me say anything on phone. She didn't even give me time to explain what happened. My wife immediately called her eldest sister too and said the same thing. The sister called me and asked for what happened. I explained to her and she advised me never to raise my hand against her again, while she stylishly insulted me, but I disregarded that. I felt like Pastor Ken in the movie, 'The Price' who had to pay for what he did not do.

I had already missed my meeting but I had to go to work. That was the most horrible day for me at work because I couldn't even use my brain to do anything. I felt cheated and sincerely felt like doing what I had already suffered for. Then I felt the urge to use a bit of my power... I transferred some money to her account and then forwarded an SMS to her giving her 24hours to make up her mind on where she would love to go, either my family home or hers because I needed a break. Fee minutes later, her eldest sister called me to say my wife forwarded my SMS to her and that she was highly disappointed in me upon what she told me in the morning. I told her that I got more infuriated and betrayed seeing my wife ruin my reputation like that. She advised again and told me to go home and hug my wife. When I got home, my wife knelt down at the door and began to apologize that it was the devil. At that time, my elder sister called me and I narrated everything to her while my wife listened to me. The next morning, my wife continued to beg me. I saw the remorse and hugged her. We became happy again. The next day, I called her sister to thank her for her intervention.

My Dad came a few days later to confirm that we had settled everything. Unfortunately, I wasn't around when he arrived, so he called me on phone and I told him I would be around in about 1 hour. Before my arrival, she spoke at length with my Dad but begged him not to allow us revisit the issue on my arrival so as not to raise dusts again. On my arrival, my Dad just advised me and said he was glad we had already settled it. Since then, I've tried to get my home together again. I started leaving my office earlier than usual even when I had unfinished tasks.

This morning, I was flipping through the apps on my wife's phone and saw Call Recorder. I opened it but discovered it had a password. As a techie, I traced the file that stores all the voice calls and began to play one of my wife's recent conversations. It was with her eldest sister who intervened into our matter then. I nearly fainted!!! The sister hailed her for acting as planned and they both laughed with satisfaction. My wife said she was happy that she successfully ruined my image in my family and they both laughed again. They said they were happy that my mum who always thought she had raised good children was made to realize that I was a beast who beats his wife and so on. But the most infuriating part was when her sister said she wanted to give her tips that would help my wife succeed in marriage. She advised my wife never to be open-minded with me and that she should begin to live a separate life while pretending to be a wife in my house. She said my wife should also open a secret account for herself so that family members can occasionally drop some token into it for her upkeep because men are unreliable and my wife agreed with all what her sister said.

I opened another and it was a conversation with her immediate elder sister - not the same as above. This one picked every member of my family and abused the hell out of us... including myself. My wife enjoyed the abuses and even cheered her to talk further. They both called me 'half man' with one testicle - a secret my wife claimed she would never reveal to anyone. In this conversation, my wife told her sister that she was very glad that she finished me through what she told my dad when I was absent, they called my mother all sort of names and this one even told my wife never to act like a good daughter-in-law towards my mother, she was advised to do everything possible to prevent my mum from visiting... and so on...

Now I am extremely mad. So many options are coming to my mind but I don't know where to start from. It is now obvious that I've been living with a stranger all the while. My day at work was so horrible that I had to leave before closing. My head and heart are both heavy now but I'm trying to put myself together. Any ideas?

Dear op, I'll advise u take that recorded clip to ur parents and family for them to hear it (u can transfer it to ur phone). I think ur parents should be in d best place to advice u on this..
Again, I for one like confronting ppl with evidence(s) I have against them that is(are) TRUE. If u can, do play d clip in d presence of ur wife and watch her reaction.. I bet she'll melt like a heated butter..
God help u bro and dnt forget to give us feedback on the outcome of things

mirob:
Dumbfounded, siblings, especially sisters has been misleading their married younger sisters for a long time now. Op just be careful, don't fully trust her again if you must keep her in your home, you never can tell what else they are plotting.
Still waiting for more updates.

Blessograo:
Ma'am I'm sorry to counter your opinion, she's not going to stop cos for her to enjoy her family abuse her husband, let the family's secret out and talk to the extent that she is opening a secret account is beyond what you think already, later the next advice is going to be she should get a house for herself and leave with their daughter. I'm a Yoruba too and I understand you perfectly but the stage you talking about has come and gone but still progressively growing like a brain tumor. It's not that she doesn't trust him, she already talked about it and they already have a final plan which is yet to explode but I hope will explode to burn their faces. Peace!

samokoduwa:
With all sense of no disrespect, dnt go through your wife phone. Marriage is an open book. For two adults and not a third person. If you can see ur wife or husband unclothedness. Phone not to go through is nothing. A man or woman wld do funny thing if no trust in marriage. No man or woman if married n wedded the right way of ur culture would put a password on phone or file. There is a trust issue and 3rd party. Which man even has time to pick a woman phone n go through with all limited time or work n fed for well being of family? Marriage has it up n down. Bro embrace self and trace where u notice the bad and have a one on one with your wife. Both of you agree, yes I do. Let no person even your mind tell you divorce. It a no no. Not even becos of your daughter you have. But becos it the right thing to do. If your mum n dad are still together why not me. Reme prayer and ask God to guide your choices.

phabulous88:
At the bolded, really? How would he have known all these things if he didn't go through her phone? I don't trust you

Lizzyangel:
why do we have freedom to personal and family life in the constitution?
must he go through his wife's phone?
note:I'm not blaming him but he shouldn't have done so in the first place, if the wife is plotting evil against him and he kept been the good hubby, it's either she end up harming herself or personally decide not to listen to her siblings again,
now he listened to everything and will never forget even if he forgives

DevGuru:
This is just to assure all Nairalanders on this thread that I am still standing. There have been further developments which I can't type now because my phone battery is low. I'll update all you wonderful ladies and gentlemen as soon as I get home. Cheers