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Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Family / My brother is driving me nut - How Should I Handle This Family Issue? (36017 Views)
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Re: My brother is driving me nut - How Should I Handle This Family Issue? by sisisioge: 10:14pm On Sep 09, 2016 |
Take the car and your continual support from him. Let him sue you! |
Re: My brother is driving me nut - How Should I Handle This Family Issue? by Neverquit(f): 10:18pm On Sep 09, 2016 |
robedu, You don try. You need to send him packing ASAP...before you do: Call a family meeting to let them know everything that happened. Those peeps will tell you that you shld keep helping that blood is thicker blah blah blah. Tell them to help him if they are that concerned...just watch how they will start grumbling. The purpose of the meeting is to let your family know so in case your brother harms you. After the meeting, kick him out and change your locks. Like someone said earlier, the moment you stop enabling him, he will hurt you...so please be wise and act swiftly. 4 Likes 1 Share |
Re: My brother is driving me nut - How Should I Handle This Family Issue? by jopretty(f): 10:21pm On Sep 09, 2016 |
Very true! Tochex101: |
Re: My brother is driving me nut - How Should I Handle This Family Issue? by babythug(f): 11:52pm On Sep 09, 2016 |
SUPERPACK: How about the previous businesses she established for him Didn't you read that he made no good from it. He's what Yoruba people call ajenirun! @Robedu repair your car, dust yourself up and live your life! Even if you shed your Blood your brother isn't likely to realize you are making a sacrifice to make him comfortable, besides he's a full grown man and doesn't need this level of pampering and indulgence anymore 8 Likes |
Re: My brother is driving me nut - How Should I Handle This Family Issue? by Jennifer89(f): 4:58am On Sep 10, 2016 |
robedu, send him out of your house. He is a 29 years old irresponsible man. Don't even think of what anybody will say coz you have tried. How long will you continue spoon feeding him? let him go and face challenges outside. He is misbehaving because 'him see food chop', tell him to go and hustle for himself 2 Likes |
Re: My brother is driving me nut - How Should I Handle This Family Issue? by flightz(f): 10:01am On Sep 10, 2016 |
ifyalways:so you are a nurse |
Re: My brother is driving me nut - How Should I Handle This Family Issue? by Nobody: 11:52am On Sep 10, 2016 |
OP I advise that you do either one of these 2 things 1. Leave the car at the mechanics. Tell your brother that you cannot afford to repair the car 2. Repair the car, sell it straight away and buy a car that he cant use for Uber. Tell him you cant afford to maintain a Uber quality car You only need to use this small car until you get married next year, after which you can buy what you want. Its unlikely he will come to you a married woman and ask you to hand over your new car for Uber then. Next do not and I repeat do not rent an apartment with the aim he will come and live with you and your husband The best you can do for him is to pay for your current apartment until it expires after which its between him and your landlord. So let him know now so he can start making plans. Sometimes we unwittingly enable people not to grow up and be irresponsible. When you stop bailing him out, then he will have to grow up and take responsibility for his life At 29 he is not a baby. 22 Likes 2 Shares |
Re: My brother is driving me nut - How Should I Handle This Family Issue? by byvan03: 1:16pm On Sep 10, 2016 |
taryour: I have the same thing in mind but OP seems too soft. If you disturb my life, I cut you off, that's how I live happily. 1 Like |
Re: My brother is driving me nut - How Should I Handle This Family Issue? by elomepee: 1:41pm On Sep 10, 2016 |
taryour: Please, there is nothing like being wicked in saying the truth. She seems not to realize that the people she is looking at to be helpless will continue their lives successfully should anything happens to her. Some people needs to be made to face the reality of life before waking up to responsibility. Seems to me, she has made herself the sacrificial lamp of the family. If you ask me, I won't call any family meeting. I will just continue with my life. And am not giving any damn key to anyone. They should be the one to call family meeting and to call him to order. It's not easy to go through the rough side of life before attaining anything meaningful. ( make dem go do house girl work for one year especially with the negative type of Madam or Oga) they will know what life is. 7 Likes |
Re: My brother is driving me nut - How Should I Handle This Family Issue? by Nobody: 2:28pm On Sep 10, 2016 |
I would advice you to tell him how it is.Tell him he is a man and he should go fend for himself and let you be.Throw his things out.He will hate you for it but heh its your life he is ruining.Be careful though someone of such nature will do anything to get your property.I understand he is your brother,but when things go funny for you,he will not be there to support you but move on to someone else. robedu: 2 Likes |
Re: My brother is driving me nut - How Should I Handle This Family Issue? by Abiodunoluseun: 2:39pm On Sep 10, 2016 |
Honestly, u re a one in a million wt what u av put up for ur siblings even wen u urself struggled to train urself without no efforts of anybody. however, if I must b honest to u ur effort will ever b fruitless until u learn to remove sentiment to embrace manly mind. the day d eaglet learn how to fly is day it left d mother's nest. if u don't allow dem to fend on their own they will never appreciate ur efforts and they will never b useful to themselfs, in other words ur aim at making them to b somebody will b defeated. so, b bold enough to drastic steps that will look like u don't care again just to make them av a meaningful life. Weldon great lady. 5 Likes 2 Shares |
Re: My brother is driving me nut - How Should I Handle This Family Issue? by elomepee: 2:48pm On Sep 10, 2016 |
tearoses: God bless you. You have said it all. 4 Likes |
Re: My brother is driving me nut - How Should I Handle This Family Issue? by Nobody: 3:16pm On Sep 10, 2016 |
elomepee: And you too |
Re: My brother is driving me nut - How Should I Handle This Family Issue? by waywardpikin: 3:17pm On Sep 10, 2016 |
Wow robedu, I'm really upset reading your story. Nothing upsets me more than ungrateful people. You owe your brother nothing trust me. You have done what most siblings would never do by training all your brothers and sisters past the university level. Kudos to you. You are an Angel. Do not give him your car anymore. You have to plan for your life and your future. Stop enabling your brother, he is a user. And be careful that he doesn't abuse you physically, just try to evict him from your house so you can have your peace of mind back. He is a man, without you he will survive. Just know that after you kick him out he will say so many horrible things about you and forget all the sacrifices you have made for him. That's human beings for you. Just stay firm with your decision for your own good. I hate self entitled people so much, God knows. 5 Likes |
Re: My brother is driving me nut - How Should I Handle This Family Issue? by taryour(f): 5:32pm On Sep 10, 2016 |
byvan03: chai sis the thing dey pain me wahalai. ELDER brother for that matter, not younger brother which would have been a little bit understandable considering that he is younger. but for this I will collect all my keys and send his sorry asS out of my house. make anybody come ask me wetin happen. this op needs a resounding slap to wake her up to reality, chai she come turn to zombie. those ppl posting and telling her to give the brother a last chance and set him up finally. if I hear, in this kind of case the elder brother is just taking advantage and using authority over her so there will never be a last chance till she wakes her brain up else she will continue to work and sweat for the comfort of her ELDER BROTHER. @ op abeg how old is your ELDER BROTHER 3 Likes 1 Share |
Re: My brother is driving me nut - How Should I Handle This Family Issue? by taryour(f): 5:51pm On Sep 10, 2016 |
robedu: Chai !!! Even your elder sister? nawa oo. it is well 2 Likes |
Re: My brother is driving me nut - How Should I Handle This Family Issue? by byvan03: 6:12pm On Sep 10, 2016 |
taryour: I tell you, too much sentiment kills. That sense of entitlement is something I discourage as soon as a relative starts showing it. 5 Likes |
Re: My brother is driving me nut - How Should I Handle This Family Issue? by taryour(f): 6:44pm On Sep 10, 2016 |
byvan03: it's so annoying. Can you imagine the guy had over 700, 000 and wrecked it till the last kobo and never gave a dime of it to his younger sis or even their mother. so what now happens if she rents him a house or set him up for the last time as they say? he will wreck it has has done to the previous funds and come for more. @ op no fear at all. evil no fit come near you o. make a drastic decision and stick to it, you no fit come kpai ontop him matter na, wetin don't renew your rent and don't ever let him know your new address once you get married cause mark my word and the time you are reading this post it will not stop there, he will come to your matrimonial home and keep asking and not just you but from your hubby too. # they always have this pity look when asking like they will drop dead the next minute if you don't give the # EXCEPT a miracle happens in their life. As for the car, if it were me, I will repair that car and sell it off and start taking public transport till I move to my husband house. show him a different you. stop eating and buy food stuff in the house pending the time you still living under same roof. always eat better food before u get home, hide stuff in your room so you can munch on should in case you feel like taking something before you go to bed. tell him you broke and you can't afford to cook cause you haven't been paid for months. keep less than 500 naira in your purse always. if you have to hide your extra change in your inner shorts DO IT. Such ppl need to be put on their track else they will wreck you. 13 Likes 2 Shares |
Re: My brother is driving me nut - How Should I Handle This Family Issue? by byvan03: 7:01pm On Sep 10, 2016 |
taryour: I totally agree, let her repair and sell that car. He shouldn't even have her next address brother or not. I can't accept being hurt by my own kindness jare. Some people are really unlimited liability irrespective of their age. 9 Likes |
Re: My brother is driving me nut - How Should I Handle This Family Issue? by sweetcocoa(f): 7:22pm On Sep 10, 2016 |
Blood or not, I will not support an irresponsible sibling. I kuku like myself, I would have packed out of that house for him, since he doesn't want to have sense, what rubbish. 5 Likes |
Re: My brother is driving me nut - How Should I Handle This Family Issue? by obicentlis: 7:48pm On Sep 10, 2016 |
Hey, sell that car for your own sake. Don't wanna go into details of my kinda experience. From experience, sell it and pretend that you don't care about his well-being. 7 Likes |
Re: My brother is driving me nut - How Should I Handle This Family Issue? by yasolan(m): 9:44pm On Sep 10, 2016 |
Its annoying ..u are fed up ..If I say I know how u feel that's a lie ..I am just sugar coating my words to make u feel better. I would say u should do one last favour for him.. Try collecting a sizeable amount from him..like selling your car to him at a loss ..this should be ur last favour to him and make him know that u won't bat an eyelid no matter what happens..let's see how the uber business goes |
Re: My brother is driving me nut - How Should I Handle This Family Issue? by subzidi: 8:09am On Sep 11, 2016 |
Your bro is undeserving, wicked, selfish and entitled! Very dangerous mix and that man can harm you if you withdraw all the priviledges therefore you must use sense and the time is now. Stop all assistance and form recession cum lack of funds from your place of work! In fact paint a very bad financial picture! Don't for any reason give him back the car, you've done enough in fact sell it off and buy a non uber car! Emotional people get into problems a lot, I'm one don't be a victim of your good nature. Life is a wicked and selfish place pls look out for yourself first! Was once like u learned in a hardway 3 Likes |
Re: My brother is driving me nut - How Should I Handle This Family Issue? by Nobody: 2:29pm On Sep 11, 2016 |
Na this kain elder brothers dey always dey Nollywood, very parasitic in nature. Wonder where he was when people were receiving sense of dignity 1 Like |
Re: My brother is driving me nut - How Should I Handle This Family Issue? by babyme1(f): 2:35pm On Sep 11, 2016 |
To everybody telling Edu to send the bro out and all, you guys dont know the kind of caring and sweet sister she is. She doesnt have the mind to cut him off so forget it. Sis, it is well. Do what ur mind tells you till you move in with your husband. BTW congrats on d upcoming wedding 2 Likes |
Re: My brother is driving me nut - How Should I Handle This Family Issue? by sweetcocoa(f): 3:05pm On Sep 11, 2016 |
babyme1:This has nothing to do with caring and being sweet, so you think the rest of us don't love our siblings or wetin? She's only enabling him and he'll never change if she doesn't take a firm decision to cut him him off her apron strings, you might think letting him keep being irresponsible is showing him love but it's not, it's actually doing him more harm than good. 7 Likes |
Re: My brother is driving me nut - How Should I Handle This Family Issue? by babyme1(f): 3:09pm On Sep 11, 2016 |
sweetcocoa: I understand you perfectly, but i doubt if Op will TOTALLY cut him off as adviced. She's a softie 1 Like |
Re: My brother is driving me nut - How Should I Handle This Family Issue? by Subconscious(m): 8:30pm On Sep 11, 2016 |
Your boat is already sinking because you refused to think ....There is no where, it is written that being nice will take you to hall of fame. If you continue to give a hand out to your brother ...You only paying for his downfall. Your brother should create a dream and chase it ....Everyone, at one time in their life have to choose their faith . The choices we make is on us ....Stop playing God and make him understand he's abusing the privilege you given him. Don't think life is an easy ride....Time will come when the brightest day will turn gray . Please focus on YOU ....People, develop unrighteous way when you set the records straight. This not the way your life should function...Do I have to list out life principles to you? Peace be upon you . 1 Like |
Re: My brother is driving me nut - How Should I Handle This Family Issue? by Nobody: 10:24pm On Sep 11, 2016 |
Op no let me swear for you oh. you dey craze? abi you dey mad? your brother dey craze. make him get out of here jo make I see road. what nonsense. Infact for putting this online shows you are a puszy. your brother too is a fool .tell him to fhurk off. and you too fhurk off 2 Likes |
Re: My brother is driving me nut - How Should I Handle This Family Issue? by DICKtator: 10:25pm On Sep 11, 2016 |
@op Like someone is using your head to dance shoki. Perhaps your village witch!!!! After all the "sins" of your elder bro you've mentioned, you still do not know what to do? OK. Sit down there till you use all your salary to pay him "irresponsible" allowance. E be like say this Buhari economy never hit you hard yet!!! P.s: and for your information People get married every weekend, students and international travellers would need a passport photograph in one way or the other so I don't understand how a photograph business would not just work!!!. Even birthday and any other ceremony needs a photographer!!! 2 Likes |
Re: My brother is driving me nut - How Should I Handle This Family Issue? by Nobody: 10:27pm On Sep 11, 2016 |
babyme1:softie? no. she's just foolish. too foolish 2 Likes |
Re: My brother is driving me nut - How Should I Handle This Family Issue? by Katyusha(m): 10:27pm On Sep 11, 2016 |
robedu: 1 Like
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