₦airaland Forum

prittygift114:
Brother, I feel your pain... Am a lady and I hate when my fellow lady play smart on good guys.
First and formost, there is nothing wrong sponsoring a girl you want to marry in the future because you love her and you feel she needs to be educated..
But then, not all ladies deserves such assistance...
Some are ingrate must especially someone like your girl who is in control of you...
The truth is that girl does not love you. She just want to put up with you to achieve her BSC, simply because she knows you are calm and good to her. She is overriding you because she knows that you loves her.
Lemme be factual with you, a girl that loves you so much cannot stay worst of it two days without hearing from you. A girl that values you will always find means to make the relationship work out.
It is even possible the girl is not a virgin or might loose it to someone else....
Lastly, if all you have written is pure truth, then rejoice for you are all fair to her but also have it in your mind that you are wasting your time with her..
Ponzi self is better.. Be wise!!!

Hmmm.soothing. People are making me feel bad. Its as if I am stupid to take care of your woman.

oya collect my advice.

keep a good face in the r/ship. and when its time for the money thing bail out with no money thats when every lil thing becomes clear: from here take your decisions.

hotwax:
Hmmm.soothing. People are making me feel bad. Its as if I am stupid to take care of your woman.

Its not stupid to take care of your woman or anybody for that matter. Take it that you are doing for God not her.
From your opening post, I don't think she loves or even likes you. No one in love can stay 4 months without keeping in touch with who she loves.
If she loves you, she would agree to marry you but may insist on waiting till she graduates to start having children.

On the other hand, I don't think you love her as well. What you feel is most likely lust, as no one in love would say he doesn't mind if another guy has sex with her as long as you've had with her. Its a no no.
My take on this is that you can help just for the sake of help without expectations or you let her go if you cannot afford to just help her.

hotwax:
I am dating this girl I met 2 years ago. I have been taking care of her (at least to the best of my ability) ever since she lost her mother. Her father could not take care of her because he is not financially buoyant to take care of 6 children at a time. Apart from taking care of her upkeeps, I also helped her gain admission into a university recently.

At this stage, the burden of her school fees and expenses is on my neck.

To the real issue. I have never touched her. We agreed that our relationship will be without sex. I visited her at school last month. We played and both got carried away. I got her naked. And, at the point of penetration, I noticed she is water tight down there. She stopped me, she said she intentionally allowed me to attempt the penetration so that I would see she is a virgin myself. She said she did not want to tell me but wanted me to confirm on my own. I was still hot in the mood, I attempted to penetrate anyways, but she resisted and started struggling with me. I thought as a gentleman if a woman says No, you should respect her wishes so it won't turn to a rape case. I left her.

Although I attempted to try again but she resisted.

The issue now is.

1. She had a boyfriend and they are still chatting on whatsap. She claimed he left her because he could not take care of some of her needs. But they still chat and call every now and then. I have challenged her on many occasions, she will just say they are just friends, nothing will make her date him again.

2. I don't know if I am wrong, I always think the only way she can be mine is if I bed her. Also, I am about spending big on her. Her school expenses alone is enough to buy a Tokunbo car. What if she does the girl thing, is that how all my effort will be a waste?

FYI: I am bent on marrying her although she keeps saying she can only talk marriage after her NYSC. She even get angry anytime I talk about marriage (Im not rushing for marriage. I just need assurance of marriage). I remember one day when I even got angry and said "This whole relationship is on your own terms. You see yourself as the center of the relationship. You dictate everything even though I carry all the pains" I later apologized for speaking in such manner.

3. Anytime we quarrel, I will be the one to apologize. If I don't call her, she won't call for eternity. The last quarrel lasted 4 months before I later call her as usual. She never apologize.

All these are making me to rethink. Thats why I keep asking her for sex. Hope I am not investing in ponzi scheme.

What do you think?

Am I fair to ask for sex?

Am I fair to her?

Are these so-called virgins actually worth the stress?

Please I need your

she doesn't love you at all, very soon, you will hear she has given the cookie jar to that boy to open for her and you have just been caressing the cookie jar, be smart and stop investing where there is nothing, you will regret it.

Run,run,run dnt look bck ,keep running we r behind u

G trust me Oyo is your case, last last there will be no show, my ex that I was sponsoring even after she fu**ked up with my mum don't wanna leave because I just did my best. if u want to sponsor her do,if u want to bleep do. but don't think one would give you the other doesn't work for everyone. mine was not a virgin so I did a well bleeping job. na she dey find me now self. trust me she doesn't wanna be with u. if she does she would have promised you a lot so as to make you stay and continue your responsibility

Shossie:
she doesn't love you at all, very soon, you will hear she has given the cookie jar to that boy to open for her and you have just been caressing the cookie jar, be smart and stop investing where there is nothing, you will regret it.

Exactly

PrinzCarter:
Run,run,run dnt look bck ,keep running we r behind u

Lolz

Though. I'm not a relationship expert but it's clearly written on the wall that this girl is not into you despite forcing her to.. It's just a matter of time before she dumps your ass

Even if you have sex her, it will not change perceived heartbreak

Use your brain bro

tosyne2much:
Though. I'm not a relationship expert but it's clearly written on the wall that this girl is not into you despite forcing her to.. It's just a matter of time before she dumps your ass

Even if you have sex her, it will not change perceived heartbreak

Use your brain bro

Noted. Thanks

What's with all these unneccesary spending on girlsCan't you invest in your own life?Come to think of it,she is still in contact with her ex..you be maga bro!

hotwax:
Yes I know I am Suegbe for her. I love her so much and I can go any mile to make her happy. Thats what love can do to a man.

However, her body language is making me think I am being played.

You are what i think you are bro..a born-again maga!

Where do people see these kind of boys from

OP, the truth is that you are a financial boyfriend to her. Better shine your eyes. Watch your back.

***clear throat *****there's a proverb which goes like this..... No matter how small a fish is if it swam into a fishermen net it will become food.... We do mistakes everyday 2 learn.... I have come to many stories like this that end up wit the guy regretting wishing if he can change back d hand of time... Bro the biggest mistake u did was spending ur hard earned money on her all in the name of schooling... Or else you r doing it generously, looking at ur story in my own opinion the love is no longer there, even if she doesn't want sex now at least 4month nd she did not call u, common Bro be real with ur self....... I have come to learn no matter how much u got family first if my fam is still lacking in some area's until dey r comfortable i ain't spending on no Gul who latter will leave me for someone who will maybe spending on her than I do.latter give him her virginity... Let's be wise Bro... ND do the right things before we fall too deep....... Bt if u Continue..... Mark this day...... After her nysc she will be done with u. Like my guyz go say if u see woman wey love you.... U go know....... Thnk u.

smoby:
***clear throat *****there's a proverb which goes like this..... No matter how small a fish is if it swam into a fishermen net it will become food.... We do mistakes everyday 2 learn.... I have come to many stories like this that end up wit the guy regretting wishing if he can change back d hand of time... Bro the biggest mistake u did was spending ur hard earned money on her all in the name of schooling... Or else you r doing it generously, looking at ur story in my own opinion the love is no longer there, even if she doesn't want sex now at least 4month nd she did not call u, common Bro be real with ur self....... I have come to learn no matter how much u got family first if my fam is still lacking in some area's until dey r comfortable i ain't spending on no Gul who latter will leave me for someone who will maybe spending on her than I do.latter give him her virginity... Let's be wise Bro... ND do the right things before we fall too deep....... Bt if u Continue..... Mark this day...... After her nysc she will be done with u. Like my guyz go say if u see woman wey love you.... U go know....... Thnk u.

Wise words. I take care of my siblings too. I loved her, and I felt I should be able to help her in her trying times.
Its not late. I have'nt pay her school fees and house rent. I posted my experience here so people can advice me, before I sink deep in this heavy commitment

olac21:
What's with all these unneccesary spending on girlsCan't you invest in your own life?Come to think of it,she is still in contact with her ex..you be maga bro!

Ok

Dude, don't waste your money. Being a virgin sef guarantees that she will leave you at the end when she starts sampling other guys.

To her reaction, most virgins don't care about any lovey dovey especially because they have no emotional connection with you. And hers is a conscious thing cos she is using the virginity thingy to tie you to her.She won't apologise cos she feels she has nothing to loose.

Leave her and move on. Use your money to do something better rather than build some heartaches for the future.

megareal:
Dude, don't waste your money. Being a virgin sef guarantees that she will leave you at the end when she starts sampling other guys.

To her reaction, most virgins don't care about any lovey dovey especially because they have no emotional connection with you. And hers is a conscious thing cos she is using the virginity thingy to tie you to her.She won't apologise cos she feels she has nothing to loose.

Leave her and move on. Use your money to do something better rather than build some heartaches for the future.

At the bolded is so true. She has no emotion even if she says "I love you" 100 times. Her "I-love-U" has no emotion tied to it.

hotwax:
At the bolded is so true. She has no emotion even if she says "I love you" 100 times. Her "I-love-U" has no emotion tied to it.

Yea, that's how they are.

megareal:
Yea, that's how they are.

Then they are not worth the hype.

Dating a prostitute will even be better. I will spend money on them and have sex. This virgin want to chop my money and dump me.

hotwax:
Then they are not worth the hype.

Dating a prostitute will even be better. I will spend money on them and have sex. This virgin want to chop my money and dump me.

Hmmmm. She's smart for now but the problem is, after the act, most virgins will get too emotional and attached and can be jealous for Africa. They will feel they own you and will act so irrational and childish that you will wonder wetin carry you go meet them.

Some of my male friends who dated or married virgins are still coming to me for counseling with their tales of woe.

megareal:
Hmmmm. She's smart for now but the problem is, after the act, most virgins will get too emotional and attached and can be jealous for Africa. They will feel they own you and will act so irrational and childish that you will wonder wetin carry you go meet them.

Some of my male friends who dated or married virgins are still coming to me for counseling with their tales of woe.

Thats the secret people don't know about virgins. Marrying a virgin does not guarantee happy marriage.

Evaberry:
Op please leave that girl alone!!! let her use her virginity to pound yam... I feel she's using you, move on is my advise and try your best not to pay her fees

Pound yam ? Mo for

Bross... That girl nor like you oo..

She nor even send u self... Na make she finish school nai be her matter now..


She say "she will talk about marriage after nysc" see ponzy scheme oo... She won finish you kpatakpata

She still holds that her ex high esteem... Don't let a girl fool you... Even God go vex for you if woman fool you..

I take God beg you.. Or wetin you dey serve take beg you... Go find another girl abeg...


That girl go dumpppppp you ooooooooooooooo

favourmic:
Pound yam ? Mo for

Chaii...people no get chill

First and foremost dat girl is wicked. How can she turn you on like dat all in the name of virgin confirmation, asin who does that?. She wicked sha no be small. Secondly, there are some things that are so glaring dat we just need to see clearly by removing our "love eyes", I mean, not calling u for almost four months should have placed a serious doubt on your mind. haba!!! A girl also dat is always having her way in a relationship and never apologises is neva a girl for u, bearing in mind dat she contributes least or nothing at all. From all the whole comments here nobody had said u should continue with d said girl so u should know it is a very simple matter. Just dump d girl asap, cut all communications with her and use d money for other worthwhile ventures. DAT soil no fit produce any fruit on d long run. lolzzz. You have known d problem, you have known d soln, just join 2 and 2 together.

She can't call and u keep spending on her... ...
My God
Did you need a Woli or Efcc to wake u up dat ubr investing on Zero




Guy u beta use her next school fees to Purchase Land in Opic or in ur village

Run run run!!!!!