₦airaland Forum

Luvdk:
Common 2million... No be your mate dey buy Ferrari 4there wives Pls let her be a beg

Luvdk:
You sound matured
10x!

adam500hr:
Hi nlanders, great morning to you all, of recent, have been suspecting my wife. She suddenly asked me for over 2million to pay rent for a new place to continue her biz, in which I declined for good reasons, because the place I had set up for her is just a year old and I spent alot on another mans property, yet no profit has even come out of the biz to even say it services part of the family's responsibility. Knowing fully well I rarely say no to her request, she felt more bad that I insisted on the decline. Infact she told me she was going to take a loan, I said if she does, my hand nor dey there, I said she should have patience like a year more that I will finance it, but she keeps saying the vacancy she saw is an opportunity that she does not want to lose it, I still maintained my decision of declining.


One night, she said she'll need my psychological support on the loan she wants to take, I replied that I cannot offer psych support on what I disagree upon, then she said I dont want to help her at all, that how much did I even spend for the first business, that is it up to 2 million, in which I spent more than. At that moment, I knew the wife I married was an ungrateful one, I just told her point blank that she should go for the loan and loan more to fix the place and buy everything she needs, then after she repays the loan, I'll blv shes a true business man and that I'll financially support anything she decides to do thereafter. She said well, I am scared of the loan, but she'll by whatever means get the money, I replied saying, whatever means u plan on getting it, make sure its clean.

Few days after, I figured out shes no longer interested in orgasm during sex, she just gives me and thats it, I already knew shes probably thinking too much and overworking herself to bring about a solution to where the money was gonna come out from, so I asked her why she has not been interested in orgasm, she said I should know that shes been working on some "BLOW JOBS" say what? She said u know have been working on some projects to get money to continue the biz, I said but u just said Mouth Action, she no I didnt say anything as such, Nlanders, If I lie make i nor see better, that was what came outta her mouth, but I am not concluding anything, just that its strange for such mistake to have been spewed. Though I got suspicious and decided to follow up on her. She has been talking to someone in secret, when she sees me she stylishly and quickly hang up. So I decided to make a very risky and rash move, that would either pay off, or ruin things. I yelled I know what u have been doing, you are a hoe that can never be trusted, that I think am done with this marriage. She got really worried that why would i call her such bla bla, she could not sleep that day, that gave me more reason to feel sumtin is probably going down, next day she sends me a text saying for me to keep calling her a hoe that she must have done something that warrants itm but she does not want to be referred ti as that anymore, and there is something am not telling her though.

I told her, I will break the news of what I know when the time is right, she then replied after two days of emotional trauma that she has finally decided to take the bold step to make my life and hers easy, she dont intend to create no drama, that all she needs me to do to avoid her getting any embarrassment from me, (what she meant is not letting people know why am calling her a hoe) is she wants me to let her know the terms and conditions with the kids and any other thing i think she should know before-hand. She also stated she would have loved to stay for her kids, but her emotions and health is failing her.

Nlanders, though I took a big risk, but isnt my confrontation with just 40% proof brought about a revelation that something has indeed happened from her response? I need candid response here as I am about to take my own decision, I cant stand a cheating wife biko.

Luvdk:
Common 2million...
No be your mate dey buy Ferrari 4there wives
Pls let her be a beg

Poorboy:
I have a solution to knowing the kind of woman she is i don't want to post it here because it's a top secret and ladies here would get the information

HungerBAD:
Interesting.

First,if we knew each other personally i will not say this because i want to mind my business,but your wife is sleeping outside and i am not sure it just started newly.

That she is even planning on leaving the family,to what she considers a greener pasture over your refusal to release that money to her,tells us your competition has really worked on her.

She will not be the first married woman to make this same mistake,of thinking that their lovers really love them and that when they walk away from their families,loverboy will just make them their number ONE.

There is a reason they say women have fish brain. They forget that loverboy sleeping with them when married,can never trust them. As a wife that cheated on her EX while married will cheat on them too,and so she usually ends losing both husband and loverboy.

She is your wife and it is your decision to make. You assumed you knew her,and that is why you married her,so you are in a better position to tell if she can cheat.

But you said she has a store?i always advice men to marry or date mostly professional women. Not saying they are better,but married women who run stores,joints,go around selling (Gold,shoes,Clothes) and stuff in offices usually sleep around a lot and the husbands are usually the last to know.

The problem with a cheating spouse,is that even if you forgive her/him it never stops. It is an habit they cant let go and that is why i tell people,if your spouse is cheating on you,let that person go.

You are compromising your life by staying with a cheating spouse.

HungerBAD:
Interesting.

First,if we knew each other personally i will not say this because i want to mind my business,but your wife is sleeping outside and i am not sure it just started newly.

That she is even planning on leaving the family,to what she considers a greener pasture over your refusal to release that money to her,tells us your competition has really worked on her.

She will not be the first married woman to make this same mistake,of thinking that their lovers really love them and that when they walk away from their families,loverboy will just make them their number ONE.

There is a reason they say women have fish brain. They forget that loverboy sleeping with them when married,can never trust them. As a wife that cheated on her EX while married will cheat on them too,and so she usually ends losing both husband and loverboy.

She is your wife and it is your decision to make. You assumed you knew her,and that is why you married her,so you are in a better position to tell if she can cheat.

But you said she has a store?i always advice men to marry or date mostly professional women. Not saying they are better,but married women who run stores,joints,go around selling (Gold,shoes,Clothes) and stuff in offices usually sleep around a lot and the husbands are usually the last to know.

The problem with a cheating spouse,is that even if you forgive her/him it never stops. It is an habit they cant let go and that is why i tell people,if your spouse is cheating on you,let that person go.

You are compromising your life by staying with a cheating spouse.

adam500hr:
You are right, The car I bought for her, she asked me why its not bought in her name, I for one never have thought about entitlement in marriages, it didnt hit my mind for once, immediately i knew she was sensing, if anything happends, what would she fall back on, I asked why she would think that deep, she said its only normal that if you buy something for someone, it should be in their name. My hand fall.

adam500hr:
Was not blind, met within 3 wks, got pregnant, told my parents i cant marry her cos i dont know her well, sbut they said in order to avoid shame for her family cos her pops was a pastor and that i woudnt want the same fate to become of my own daughter, that i'll just have to marry her. Thats where the story of my life began.

adam500hr:
Was not blind, met within 3 wks, got pregnant, told my parents i cant marry her cos i dont know her well, sbut they said in order to avoid shame for her family cos her pops was a pastor and that i woudnt want the same fate to become of my own daughter, that i'll just have to marry her. Thats where the story of my life began.

shumuel:
Have read your story, have seen the good advises rendered to you, and i am here to add to it because i feel your pain.

First of all; don't, no matter what rush into marriage, especially if you know you don't really love the person.

Now, from what you have said, the business wasn't succeeding, i am sure that might also be the reason why your wife wants to change location, she is the one handling the business, so i believe she would know better, she probably made the decision for the progress of the business, am sure she had done some research, you should had been calm and reason with her; see things through her own eye, and give her the money if you can afford it but if you couldn't you should had explained that to her calmly instead of rubbing her failure on her face by pointing it out that the business hadn't succeed yet, anyways i understand, N2million isn't childs play, and it probably made you mad knowing you'll have to cough out such an amount again but you should had taken it easy with her, women are very emotional creatures, and one thing i would like you to know is; when someone sets their mind on something(A goal) and feels it so real, if they don't achieve it it would make them surfucate, and this is very common with women, so... In order to stay alive, they find every means posible to get it done, and yes even if it means cheating.

Well, i'll advice you sit her down, talk things through and if you can afford the new rent she had demanded, please give it to her or assist her to secure the loan but please only use properties that wont affect you or the family later, incase she was unable to pay back.

Now for the ''If'' she had cheated part, look brother i'll tell you clean clear, there isn't any lady out there that wont or isn't cheating, so forget it and let it go, yes i know it hurts but let me ask you; was she a Virgin when you met her, were you yourself a virgin when you both met ? So if the answer is No why be bothered about she cheating now, i know it might sound stupid to you but just think it through.

All i want for you is to keep your marriage, and don't allow people who don't know your wife insult her, incase you don't know you are now one and if she is insulted you are also insulted. And as for she being quick to jump into conclusions, come brother we all know divorce is the new trend, married today, divorce tomorrow, i guess thats why she has always been insecured, just let it go, forgive her, support her and love her because either you like it or not, she is your wife.

Don't let third parties come in between you both.

Have a nice life, regards to your wife

favoured78:
I am not siding her.....but your last statement really got me there "I can't stand a cheating wife"
But it is a known fact that men cheat for no reason as against yours that is cheating for 2 million naira......

If you are having your kids at mind and your pride as a man as you can't stand a wife who is cheating for an available 2 million then you will have to play the role of a fool to save your marriage.......this must always be done by either of the partner in all marriages, ....listen, let me put it plainly to you that you will be giving up your marriage, your respect, reputation, respect from your kids etc for just 2 million. .......is that what you really proposed to do at the altar, is that what you set your mind to as you chose to join the cliché of the married brothers who said for better for worse .........this is not even close to worst and you two are thinking of parting ways......where foes your thinking as a man, pride as a man.......and the extra number 7th sense men claim to have that makes them see themselves superior to women when you are already chickened out by this test....if you were to be in her shoes, I doubt if you will behave better

Women take more shit than this which your are complaning of .....and you men including myself will bear witness to this......we cheat for stupid reasons but most women cheat for reasons quite tangible but not justifiable. ....so , Married man......it is a temptation you should overcome.....talk things with your wife ooo ......to me, your story is incomplete. .....something is really lacking, engage in meaningful conversation......and your bond will be better.


Divorce for such a thing is not worth . Use WISDOM.[color=#990000][/color]

Omotayor123:
Mr. adam500hr

I'm talking now from your wife point of view.

she's not cheating on you at all. All those attitude and things she displayed are just stunts to make you jealous and do the needful. But you took it the wrong way.

she's used to you giving her what she wanted and on this matter you should have employ diplomacy & stood your ground without hurting her emotions. But you did.

The fact where she asked you what you have ever done for her is peculiar to all women. you can't judge her based on that. it's Everywhere.[/font]

And for you to call her a hoe and other names on baseless accusations is just the height of it all for her. she can't stand it anymore hence her decision to leave.

first you turn down her request, she tries to get your attention and you took it to another level already.

Bro. for the love of God pls. Apologize to your wife and let this end.
You shouldn't let your beautiful marriage end like that.

Afterwards, tell her all your grievances about her attitudes and all. I'm sure she will apologize too. pls. let sleeping dogs lie

Apology doesn't mean you are Right or the other is Wrong, it simply means you value your relationship more than you ago. Why not say sorry And move Forward

henryhemon:
See her nose.

adam500hr:
UNFORTUNATELY, I have had heart to heart talks with her during past incidences, its just seems not to work, and dont have faith seeing it work,I would have to seek a spiritual procedure, call on God. Cos if God fit give me two wonderful pikin thru this woman wey nor dey loyal, then I need not to blow that blessing away.

@Every!, is is best to consult a councilor? I doubt that, cos our first counseling, she gave too much details that even the counselor felt sort of uncomfortable. Will a pastor be advisable? That too depends on the pastor, its only God that can see through a real pastor, some will claim to want to administer help, they use prayers to try to penetrate ones wife. Or is there therapy that can handle this situation?

HungerBAD:
Interesting.

First,if we knew each other personally i will not say this because i want to mind my business,but your wife is sleeping outside and i am not sure it just started newly.

That she is even planning on leaving the family,to what she considers a greener pasture over your refusal to release that money to her,tells us your competition has really worked on her.

She will not be the first married woman to make this same mistake,of thinking that their lovers really love them and that when they walk away from their families,loverboy will just make them their number ONE.

There is a reason they say women have fish brain. They forget that loverboy sleeping with them when married,can never trust them. As a wife that cheated on her EX while married will cheat on them too,and so she usually ends losing both husband and loverboy.

She is your wife and it is your decision to make. You assumed you knew her,and that is why you married her,so you are in a better position to tell if she can cheat.

But you said she has a store?i always advice men to marry or date mostly professional women. Not saying they are better,but married women who run stores,joints,go around selling (Gold,shoes,Clothes) and stuff in offices usually sleep around a lot and the husbands are usually the last to know.

The problem with a cheating spouse,is that even if you forgive her/him it never stops. It is an habit they cant let go and that is why i tell people,if your spouse is cheating on you,let that person go.

You are compromising your life by staying with a cheating spouse.

adam500hr:
Hi nlanders, great morning to you all, of recent, have been suspecting my wife. She suddenly asked me for over 2million to pay rent for a new place to continue her biz, in which I declined for good reasons, because the place I had set up for her is just a year old and I spent alot on another mans property, yet no profit has even come out of the biz to even say it services part of the family's responsibility. Knowing fully well I rarely say no to her request, she felt more bad that I insisted on the decline. Infact she told me she was going to take a loan, I said if she does, my hand nor dey there, I said she should have patience like a year more that I will finance it, but she keeps saying the vacancy she saw is an opportunity that she does not want to lose it, I still maintained my decision of declining.


One night, she said she'll need my psychological support on the loan she wants to take, I replied that I cannot offer psych support on what I disagree upon, then she said I dont want to help her at all, that how much did I even spend for the first business, that is it up to 2 million, in which I spent more than. At that moment, I knew the wife I married was an ungrateful one, I just told her point blank that she should go for the loan and loan more to fix the place and buy everything she needs, then after she repays the loan, I'll blv shes a true business man and that I'll financially support anything she decides to do thereafter. She said well, I am scared of the loan, but she'll by whatever means get the money, I replied saying, whatever means u plan on getting it, make sure its clean.

Few days after, I figured out shes no longer interested in orgasm during sex, she just gives me and thats it, I already knew shes probably thinking too much and overworking herself to bring about a solution to where the money was gonna come out from, so I asked her why she has not been interested in orgasm, she said I should know that shes been working on some "BLOW JOBS" say what? She said u know have been working on some projects to get money to continue the biz, I said but u just said Mouth Action, she no I didnt say anything as such, Nlanders, If I lie make i nor see better, that was what came outta her mouth, but I am not concluding anything, just that its strange for such mistake to have been spewed. Though I got suspicious and decided to follow up on her. She has been talking to someone in secret, when she sees me she stylishly and quickly hang up. So I decided to make a very risky and rash move, that would either pay off, or ruin things. I yelled I know what u have been doing, you are a hoe that can never be trusted, that I think am done with this marriage. She got really worried that why would i call her such bla bla, she could not sleep that day, that gave me more reason to feel sumtin is probably going down, next day she sends me a text saying for me to keep calling her a hoe that she must have done something that warrants itm but she does not want to be referred ti as that anymore, and there is something am not telling her though.

I told her, I will break the news of what I know when the time is right, she then replied after two days of emotional trauma that she has finally decided to take the bold step to make my life and hers easy, she dont intend to create no drama, that all she needs me to do to avoid her getting any embarrassment from me, (what she meant is not letting people know why am calling her a hoe) is she wants me to let her know the terms and conditions with the kids and any other thing i think she should know before-hand. She also stated she would have loved to stay for her kids, but her emotions and health is failing her.

Nlanders, though I took a big risk, but isnt my confrontation with just 40% proof brought about a revelation that something has indeed happened from her response? I need candid response here as I am about to take my own decision, I cant stand a cheating wife biko.

shumuel:
Have read your story, have seen the good advises rendered to you, and i am here to add to it because i feel your pain.

First of all; don't, no matter what rush into marriage, especially if you know you don't really love the person.

Now, from what you have said, the business wasn't succeeding, i am sure that might also be the reason why your wife wants to change location, she is the one handling the business, so i believe she would know better, she probably made the decision for the progress of the business, am sure she had done some research, you should had been calm and reason with her; see things through her own eye, and give her the money if you can afford it but if you couldn't you should had explained that to her calmly instead of rubbing her failure on her face by pointing it out that the business hadn't succeed yet, anyways i understand, N2million isn't childs play, and it probably made you mad knowing you'll have to cough out such an amount again but you should had taken it easy with her, women are very emotional creatures, and one thing i would like you to know is; when someone sets their mind on something(A goal) and feels it so real, if they don't achieve it it would make them surfucate, and this is very common with women, so... In order to stay alive, they find every means posible to get it done, and yes even if it means cheating.

Well, i'll advice you sit her down, talk things through and if you can afford the new rent she had demanded, please give it to her or assist her to secure the loan but please only use properties that wont affect you or the family later, incase she was unable to pay back.

Now for the ''If'' she had cheated part, look brother i'll tell you clean clear, there isn't any lady out there that wont or isn't cheating, so forget it and let it go, yes i know it hurts but let me ask you; was she a Virgin when you met her, were you yourself a virgin when you both met ? So if the answer is No why be bothered about she cheating now, i know it might sound stupid to you but just think it through.

All i want for you is to keep your marriage, and don't allow people who don't know your wife insult her, incase you don't know you are now one and if she is insulted you are also insulted. And as for she being quick to jump into conclusions, come brother we all know divorce is the new trend, married today, divorce tomorrow, i guess thats why she has always been insecured, just let it go, forgive her, support her and love her because either you like it or not, she is your wife.

Don't let third parties come in between you both.

Have a nice life, regards to your wife

adam500hr:
of recent, have been suspecting my wife. She suddenly asked me for over 2million to pay rent for a new place to continue her biz,
Knowing fully well I rarely say no to her request, she felt more bad that I insisted on the decline. Infact she told me she was going to take a loan, I said if she does, my hand nor dey there, she keeps saying the vacancy she saw is an opportunity that she does not want to lose it, I still maintained my decision of declining.


she'll need my psychological support on the loan she wants to take, I cannot offer psych support even spend for the first business, She said well, I am scared of the loan, but she'll by whatever means get the money, I replied saying, whatever means u plan on getting it, make sure its clean., I figured out shes no longer interested in orgasm during sex, I already knew shes probably thinking too much and overworking herself to bring about a solution to where the money was gonna come out from, so I asked her why she has not been interested in orgasm, she said I should know that shes been working on some "BLOW JOBS" say what? She said u know have been working on some projects to get money to continue the biz, I said but u just said Mouth Action, she no I didnt say anything as such, Nlanders, If I lie make i nor see better, that was what came outta her mouth, but I am not concluding anything, just that its strange for such mistake to have been spewed. Though I got suspicious and decided to follow up on her. She has been talking to someone in secret, when she sees me she stylishly and quickly hang up. So I decided to make a very risky and rash move, that would either pay off, or ruin things. I yelled I know what u have been doing, you are a hoe that can never be trusted, that I think am done with this marriage. She got really worried that why would i call her such bla bla, she could not sleep that day, that gave me more reason to feel sumtin is probably going down, next day she sends me a text saying for me to keep calling her a hoe that she must have done something that warrants itm but she does not want to be referred ti as that anymore, and there is something am not telling her though.

I told her, I will break the news of what I know when the time is right, she then replied after two days of emotional trauma that she has finally decided to take the bold step to make my life and hers easy, she dont intend to create no drama, that all she needs me to do to avoid her getting any embarrassment from me, (what she meant is not letting people know why am calling her a hoe) is she wants me to let her know the terms and conditions with the kids and any other thing i think she should know before-hand. She also stated she would have loved to stay for her kids, but her emotions and health is failing her.

Nlanders, though I took a big risk, but isnt my confrontation with just 40% proof brought about a revelation that something has indeed happened from her response? I need candid response here as I am about to take my own decision, I cant stand a cheating wife biko.

djfiki:
From what I can see.

Your wife is been blackmailed, that's why she needs the money. She doesn't need a new shop.

She said something about not been able to bear the shame.


Let me take a guess. That first pregnancy that made you marry her probably wasn't yours. It happens all the time, you were the boyfriend that accepted the pregnancy, but doesn't mean it's your baby.

5DMindset:
Looks like the only reason anyone should marry these days is just for the sex, and the expenses on a partner should be equated to the quality and quantity of sex, cos I dont really understand what is going on. It used to be a single lady seeking assistance that sleeps around, now even married women that their husbands have done their best to provide the basic needs, going around and hunting for extra cash to put up appearances and be like their instagram and facebook friends, so they can generate 'likes' and 'shares'.

I have avoided several married women, and some I didnt even know until after they have done the deeds. These days, love means nothing other than having fantasy feelings with the person who can afford their bills.

There is nothing you can do my brother, you got to put your home together and play the detective. The marriage can never be the same again, except you are ready to step out of the mind-body complex and stay removed from emotions while observing her every move. Even if you marry a new woman now, the moment the attraction wanes, they join their friends to enjoy sex on crack cocaine. Drugs are ravaging marriages and relationships these days like crazy and there is nothing you can do to heal a marriage once a woman tastes that shit and get hooked. If she hasnt gone that line, take her back, always know that a repentant enemy is better than a friend. Cos friends are there for with a prerogative of self interest, but when a women knows what she has to run around to eat against being provided, her head go correct.

Shake her small, and take her back, then shut down the business until she is ready to be humble. The business is what empowers her to do shit. Cut her wings and see her crawl, then get her a better thing to do when she don repent from insulting her husband.

I dont remember what business you opened for her, but if it is hair dressing, massage/spa ESPECIALLY if there is massage/spa, then she probably has taken over the massage business and has been great on happy endings. I know these because I have virtually been a customer of many Spas in VI/Lekki Phase 1 and its environs, and I know that big man wife dey give bj to any customer willing to pay good money, even when the car she drives is worth more than 10m, I pity men like us, wahala dey town. Na issues like this make me no dey trust myself, not even to talk of trusting any human being when it comes to sex. Dont we all do it even for fantasy ? Truth is, it is rare to find a human being that hasnt cheated, we were not designed to be married. Period.

danberg:
Best post so far

danberg:
Best post so far

adam500hr:
Was not blind, met within 3 wks, got pregnant, told my parents i cant marry her cos i dont know her well, sbut they said in order to avoid shame for her family cos her pops was a pastor and that i woudnt want the same fate to become of my own daughter, that i'll just have to marry her. Thats where the story of my life began.

adam500hr:
Was not blind, met within 3 wks, got pregnant, told my parents i cant marry her cos i dont know her well, sbut they said in order to avoid shame for her family cos her pops was a pastor and that i woudnt want the same fate to become of my own daughter, that i'll just have to marry her. Thats where the story of my life began.

dangotesmummy:
then discuss with her as husband to wife I said discuss,as in have a civilized discussion devoid of attacks,name calling and confrontations. Tell her you don't like all the disrespect and all and if you disrespected her in front of another woman how will she feel.all you need is a midnight heart to heart conversation and tell her to make her choice. From there you'll know where your marriage is heading to