₦airaland Forum

Jodha:
All im trying to say is nobody is perfect...

Before he decided to relocate to another place and settle down with her....he must have seen some traits in her that are wife material...

If he loves her...he'll overlook her shortcomings..

Jodha:
She made a mistake....i bet she did it for the child....a child will suffer emotional truama growing up and been called a bastard...if the guy rejected...

H2Ossss:
Oga... Calm down... She made a mistake because of fear or insecurity.. If he really loves her he should be ready to forgive and move on.... Its not easy to start a new relationship

d4guy:
She followed one of those yeye advice una dey give ... Smh

sparklezeee:
I tire o. Just imagine me when be virgin go dey give married people with at least 5 children advice.The worst part is that most of them would take the advice.

phykiesexy:
All d guys here are just saying she is heartless. I can bet my toe nail that you guys have also denied a lady that told u she was pregnant. I don't blame the girl at all. I got pregnant too for my bf. He was even d one that told me I was pregnant. I did a test at general hospital to be sure. His mother kept asking when n how did it happen. I had to do another test at his brothers hospital so they can calculate it. I faced persecution from everybody. My mother was even d worst. Her words were very hurtful to me. D baby daddy after the whole saga travelled. I was by myself with my child. I was made to sit at the back of the church for four months with everybody advising me like i was the worst sinner. Cus his family made sure I must go to d church. Where was my baby father no where to be found. Whenever I look at my son, I am glad I didn't do abortion. But if I had to follow what I was made to go through abortion was like d best option. So I don't blame d girl abeg. Poster if u can't forgive her please move ahead someone else would understand.

fayded:
That "2".. In ur moniker should be removed. Good, now pronounce ur moniker..
Thats exactly the people u re talking like.. Ryt now.

Jodha:
If the pregnancy wasnt his....she wouldnt have bothered telling him...
no one is that stupid...

sixhours:
Hi Nairalanders,

I need your mature advice here. I am in a committed relationship with this lady. She works in lagos and I work in Asaba. I was initially in lagos but was transferred to Asaba. I do visit her regularly in lagos and she comes to Asaba too. Recently, an opening came up in Lagos within the company and I applied to be transferred back to fill this position. My application is currently pending approval. My reason for asking for this transfer is because I want to get married to this lady. And it is best we live in the same state after marriage. She can't move to Asaba because that will mean she has to look for another job. Instead, I felt I can work my transfer back to lagos.

Over the long independence holiday, I decided to visit my fiancee in lagos to share my plans with her. When I got to lagos, I noticed she was all moody. I then asked her wassup. She then said she is pregnant. After saying it, she paused and looked at my face. I was excited. I hugged her. Kissed her and brought out a new wristwatch I bought for her (she loves wristwatches). Then, I started explaining how I applied to be transferred back to lagos because I want to start a family with her. While I was talking, she started crying. I then asked to know what the issue was. She then answered that she aborted the pregnancy. I was shocked. She showed me the doctor's report confirming she was 4 weeks pregnant. But, she said she did not want to receive the usual rejection that comes from a guy when she tells the guy she is pregnant. Therefore, she just removed it. She said, she told herself that when she tells me I got her pregnant, and I start to act up, she will just tell me that she has already taken it off.

Since that day, I have not being myself. I do not know if I should continue with her. She has a big problem. She assumes too much. She concludes too much. She always tries to act like she is smarter than everyone in the room. Before you say A, she concludes you will also say B and C. A part of me wants my application for transfer to be denied.

What should I do? Mature advice only.

Jodha:
...
Yh yhure rght....but all im saying is ..nobody is perfect...

Maybe she recieved the wrong advice..at the wrong time...

She didn't receive any wrong advice, she made her choice and she should bear the consequences herself....

I can't stand the presence of such lady not to talk of getting married to her after what she did

joe4christ:
No. You might be wromg here, she might have decided to tell him cos she knew with him being around her, its matter of hours before he will find out she's pregnant or did an abortion.
Put into consideration that he will surely want to make love to her since he just arrived in town purposely to see her, so during pre-intimacy "sucking of bwest" for a lady who just did abortion, bweast milk might will definitely be proceeding out of her and that will make any sharp guy know for certain

what's up!

joe4christ:
No. You might be wromg here, she might have decided to tell him cos she knew with him being around her, its matter of hours before he will find out she's pregnant or did an abortion.
Put into consideration that he will surely want to make love to her since he just arrived in town purposely to see her, so during pre-intimacy "sucking of bwest" for a lady who just did abortion, bweast milk might will definitely be proceeding out of her and that will make any sharp guy know for certain
what's up!

sixhours:
Hi Nairalanders,

I need your mature advice here. I am in a committed relationship with this lady. She works in lagos and I work in Asaba. I was initially in lagos but was transferred to Asaba. I do visit her regularly in lagos and she comes to Asaba too. Recently, an opening came up in Lagos within the company and I applied to be transferred back to fill this position. My application is currently pending approval. My reason for asking for this transfer is because I want to get married to this lady. And it is best we live in the same state after marriage. She can't move to Asaba because that will mean she has to look for another job. Instead, I felt I can work my transfer back to lagos.

Over the long independence holiday, I decided to visit my fiancee in lagos to share my plans with her. When I got to lagos, I noticed she was all moody. I then asked her wassup. She then said she is pregnant. After saying it, she paused and looked at my face. I was excited. I hugged her. Kissed her and brought out a new wristwatch I bought for her (she loves wristwatches). Then, I started explaining how I applied to be transferred back to lagos because I want to start a family with her. While I was talking, she started crying. I then asked to know what the issue was. She then answered that she aborted the pregnancy. I was shocked. She showed me the doctor's report confirming she was 4 weeks pregnant. But, she said she did not want to receive the usual rejection that comes from a guy when she tells the guy she is pregnant. Therefore, she just removed it. She said, she told herself that when she tells me I got her pregnant, and I start to act up, she will just tell me that she has already taken it off.

Since that day, I have not being myself. I do not know if I should continue with her. She has a big problem. She assumes too much. She concludes too much. She always tries to act like she is smarter than everyone in the room. Before you say A, she concludes you will also say B and C. A part of me wants my application for transfer to be denied.

What should I do? Mature advice only.

ScotFree:
Listen Bro... What she did was terrible. I'm not sayin terrible in the aspect of what is morally right or wrong. I mean terrible in the aspect that it wasn't just her decision to make alone. She didn't impregnate herself, neither is she in a relationship with herself alone. She SHOULD or MUST consult you before anything. What you decide and agree on together is what should be done eventually.

She didn't act like someone who believes in the relationship you guys have and share. If she did, she wouldn't take a serious decision like this without your knowledge. Now that brings me down to my point.

I doubt any girl would naturally abort a pregancy without involving or informing her partner. Girls here woud confirm this. It is a scary procedure and they must reach out to you regardless of whether they intend to keep it or not. So i sense a rat here. A very big stinking rat.

1. That pregnancy was never yours. ( She got pregnant while you were away and decided to remove it before you came back. And somewhere along the line, the guilt of the enormity of the act was too much to hide, it killed her inside and she couldn't hide it well. When you noticed, she then decided to unburded her heart while still telling a lie about who was responsible for this )

2. She was never pregnant in the first ( Don't know what she would want to achieve with that though. But the heart of humans can be very devious. She was probably trying to put you on a guilt trip for something you do or fail to do )

I wouldn't advice you to stay with a woman like that. I don't know how far along you guys have come, but you have to be objective when you are ready to make a decision on this matter. A woman who could do this , can do much more without you concert, not to think of the underlying motives behind this action. This is just one of the few things she might have done that you know of.

Sit her down, and talk to her. Speak your mind freely. Leh her know this could be the deciding factor on the future of your relationship. Tell her you want the truth and nothing but the truth. Tell her you don't believe her story and she had better start spilling the truth or you walk away without looking back.

The truth is i won't be with a woman like that after this. I smell lots of untruth in her story. Whatever she says eventually will affect my decision.

I cant tell you what to do. Read the comments, and do what is right. It's early, you're not married yet.

Your girl is not ready for a serious relationship

Your girl cannot make a good wife

Your girl sees no future in what you guys have

Your girl will do really horrible things when you're eventually married to her

Your girl isn't your girl

Your girl isn't ready to be a mother

Lefulefu
Pussyhunter
Sexybbstar
Augustap
Adaumunocha

Your advice is needed


I sent you a pm. Reply. We got something to talk about

Mille:
Something similar happened to me and I feel your pain.

In my case, we were even cohabiting, 2yrs in at the time and I noticed signs of pregnancy in her. Went for a test and came out positive; 8weeks. I can say it remains the happiest moment of my life.

The next day, I discovered my girl was moody. It was all about one stupid hungry fake pastor that told her I would abandon her with the baby not marry her in future. A 'prophesy' I still find laughable till today. Calmed her down, promised her heaven and even swore on my life.

The day after, she went out to visit a friend (one who I discovered gave her abortion concoctions) while I planned to take her to my family in Lagos and get everything settled. When she got back, I told her to pack her bags and we headed for Lagos.

I remember that on entering the gate of my parent's house to introduce them to my 'pregnant fiancée', I noticed blood coming out. I didn't need anyone to tell me what has happened. Confirmed it medically the next day, and ended up paying for an operation for her because it caused some medical complications.


Since that day, Man or woman, friend or foe, if you are the overly religious type whose brain does not function, nor have the tenacity to think on its own without following some silly fabricated book or listening to conmen who hide under religion, I stay away from you.

Jodha:
Forgive her....its not totally her fault that some guys are thoughtless beasts.....

Abortion is not a good thing but...she made a mistake everyone does....

FORGIVE HER!!

Jodha:
If the pregnancy wasnt his....she wouldnt have bothered telling him...
no one is that stupid...

ScotFree:
Listen Bro... What she did was terrible. I'm not sayin terrible in the aspect of what is morally right or wrong. I mean terrible in the aspect that it wasn't just her decision to make alone. She didn't impregnate herself, neither is she in a relationship with herself alone. She SHOULD or MUST consult you before anything. What you decide and agree on together is what should be done eventually.

She didn't act like someone who believes in the relationship you guys have and share. If she did, she wouldn't take a serious decision like this without your knowledge. Now that brings me down to my point.

I doubt any girl would naturally abort a pregancy without involving or informing her partner. Girls here woud confirm this. It is a scary procedure and they must reach out to you regardless of whether they intend to keep it or not. So i sense a rat here. A very big stinking rat.

1. That pregnancy was never yours. ( She got pregnant while you were away and decided to remove it before you came back. And somewhere along the line, the guilt of the enormity of the act was too much to hide, it killed her inside and she couldn't hide it well. When you noticed, she then decided to unburded her heart while still telling a lie about who was responsible for this )

2. She was never pregnant in the first ( Don't know what she would want to achieve with that though. But the heart of humans can be very devious. She was probably trying to put you on a guilt trip for something you do or fail to do )

I wouldn't advice you to stay with a woman like that. I don't know how far along you guys have come, but you have to be objective when you are ready to make a decision on this matter. A woman who could do this , can do much more without you concert, not to think of the underlying motives behind this action. This is just one of the few things she might have done that you know of.

Sit her down, and talk to her. Speak your mind freely. Leh her know this could be the deciding factor on the future of your relationship. Tell her you want the truth and nothing but the truth. Tell her you don't believe her story and she had better start spilling the truth or you walk away without looking back.

The truth is i won't be with a woman like that after this. I smell lots of untruth in her story. Whatever she says eventually will affect my decision.

I cant tell you what to do. Read the comments, and do what is right. It's early, you're not married yet.

Your girl is not ready for a serious relationship

Your girl cannot make a good wife

Your girl sees no future in what you guys have

Your girl will do really horrible things when you're eventually married to her

Your girl isn't your girl

Your girl isn't ready to be a mother

Lefulefu
Pussyhunter
Sexybbstar
Augustap
Adaumunocha

Your advice is needed


I sent you a pm. Reply. We got something to talk about

ScotFree:
Listen Bro... What she did was terrible. I'm not sayin terrible in the aspect of what is morally right or wrong. I mean terrible in the aspect that it wasn't just her decision to make alone. She didn't impregnate herself, neither is she in a relationship with herself alone. She SHOULD or MUST consult you before anything. What you decide and agree on together is what should be done eventually.

She didn't act like someone who believes in the relationship you guys have and share. If she did, she wouldn't take a serious decision like this without your knowledge. Now that brings me down to my point.

I doubt any girl would naturally abort a pregancy without involving or informing her partner. Girls here woud confirm this. It is a scary procedure and they must reach out to you regardless of whether they intend to keep it or not. So i sense a rat here. A very big stinking rat.

1. That pregnancy was never yours. ( She got pregnant while you were away and decided to remove it before you came back. And somewhere along the line, the guilt of the enormity of the act was too much to hide, it killed her inside and she couldn't hide it well. When you noticed, she then decided to unburded her heart while still telling a lie about who was responsible for this )

2. She was never pregnant in the first ( Don't know what she would want to achieve with that though. But the heart of humans can be very devious. She was probably trying to put you on a guilt trip for something you do or fail to do )

I wouldn't advice you to stay with a woman like that. I don't know how far along you guys have come, but you have to be objective when you are ready to make a decision on this matter. A woman who could do this , can do much more without you concert, not to think of the underlying motives behind this action. This is just one of the few things she might have done that you know of.

Sit her down, and talk to her. Speak your mind freely. Leh her know this could be the deciding factor on the future of your relationship. Tell her you want the truth and nothing but the truth. Tell her you don't believe her story and she had better start spilling the truth or you walk away without looking back.

The truth is i won't be with a woman like that after this. I smell lots of untruth in her story. Whatever she says eventually will affect my decision.

I cant tell you what to do. Read the comments, and do what is right. It's early, you're not married yet.

Your girl is not ready for a serious relationship

Your girl cannot make a good wife

Your girl sees no future in what you guys have

Your girl will do really horrible things when you're eventually married to her

Your girl isn't your girl

Your girl isn't ready to be a mother

Lefulefu
Pussyhunter
Sexybbstar
Augustap
Adaumunocha

Your advice is needed


I sent you a pm. Reply. We got something to talk about

ScotFree:
Listen Bro... What she did was terrible. I'm not sayin terrible in the aspect of what is morally right or wrong. I mean terrible in the aspect that it wasn't just her decision to make alone. She didn't impregnate herself, neither is she in a relationship with herself alone. She SHOULD or MUST consult you before anything. What you decide and agree on together is what should be done eventually.

She didn't act like someone who believes in the relationship you guys have and share. If she did, she wouldn't take a serious decision like this without your knowledge. Now that brings me down to my point.

I doubt any girl would naturally abort a pregancy without involving or informing her partner. Girls here woud confirm this. It is a scary procedure and they must reach out to you regardless of whether they intend to keep it or not. So i sense a rat here. A very big stinking rat.

1. That pregnancy was never yours. ( She got pregnant while you were away and decided to remove it before you came back. And somewhere along the line, the guilt of the enormity of the act was too much to hide, it killed her inside and she couldn't hide it well. When you noticed, she then decided to unburded her heart while still telling a lie about who was responsible for this )

2. She was never pregnant in the first ( Don't know what she would want to achieve with that though. But the heart of humans can be very devious. She was probably trying to put you on a guilt trip for something you do or fail to do )

I wouldn't advice you to stay with a woman like that. I don't know how far along you guys have come, but you have to be objective when you are ready to make a decision on this matter. A woman who could do this , can do much more without you concert, not to think of the underlying motives behind this action. This is just one of the few things she might have done that you know of.

Sit her down, and talk to her. Speak your mind freely. Leh her know this could be the deciding factor on the future of your relationship. Tell her you want the truth and nothing but the truth. Tell her you don't believe her story and she had better start spilling the truth or you walk away without looking back.

The truth is i won't be with a woman like that after this. I smell lots of untruth in her story. Whatever she says eventually will affect my decision.

I cant tell you what to do. Read the comments, and do what is right. It's early, you're not married yet.

Your girl is not ready for a serious relationship

Your girl cannot make a good wife

Your girl sees no future in what you guys have

Your girl will do really horrible things when you're eventually married to her

Your girl isn't your girl

Your girl isn't ready to be a mother

Lefulefu
Pussyhunter
Sexybbstar
Augustap
Adaumunocha

Your advice is needed


I sent you a pm. Reply. We got something to talk about

H2Ossss:
I'll do that when you remove the " yded" in your moniker and add a "g"..... Now read it out.... Exactly what you are

Mille:
Something similar happened to me and I feel your pain.

In my case, we were even cohabiting, 2yrs in at the time and I noticed signs of pregnancy in her. Went for a test and came out positive; 8weeks. I can say it remains the happiest moment of my life.

The next day, I discovered my girl was moody. It was all about one stupid hungry fake pastor that told her I would abandon her with the baby not marry her in future. A 'prophesy' I still find laughable till today. Calmed her down, promised her heaven and even swore on my life.

The day after, she went out to visit a friend (one who I discovered gave her abortion concoctions) while I planned to take her to my family in Lagos and get everything settled. When she got back, I told her to pack her bags and we headed for Lagos.

I remember that on entering the gate of my parent's house to introduce them to my 'pregnant fiancée', I noticed blood coming out. I didn't need anyone to tell me what has happened. Confirmed it medically the next day, and ended up paying for an operation for her because it caused some medical complications.


Since that day, Man or woman, friend or foe, if you are the overly religious type whose brain does not function, nor have the tenacity to think on its own without following some silly fabricated book or listening to conmen who hide under religion, I stay away from you.

so is da book dat told her to abort

Jodha:
[s]Forgive her....its not totally her fault that some guys are thoughtless beasts.....

Abortion is not a good thing but...she made a mistake everyone does....

FORGIVE HER!![/s]

d4guy:
She followed one of those yeye advice una dey give ... Smh

sixhours:
Hi Nairalanders,

I need your mature advice here. I am in a committed relationship with this lady. She works in lagos and I work in Asaba. I was initially in lagos but was transferred to Asaba. I do visit her regularly in lagos and she comes to Asaba too. Recently, an opening came up in Lagos within the company and I applied to be transferred back to fill this position. My application is currently pending approval. My reason for asking for this transfer is because I want to get married to this lady. And it is best we live in the same state after marriage. She can't move to Asaba because that will mean she has to look for another job. Instead, I felt I can work my transfer back to lagos.

Over the long independence holiday, I decided to visit my fiancee in lagos to share my plans with her. When I got to lagos, I noticed she was all moody. I then asked her wassup. She then said she is pregnant. After saying it, she paused and looked at my face. I was excited. I hugged her. Kissed her and brought out a new wristwatch I bought for her (she loves wristwatches). Then, I started explaining how I applied to be transferred back to lagos because I want to start a family with her. While I was talking, she started crying. I then asked to know what the issue was. She then answered that she aborted the pregnancy. I was shocked. She showed me the doctor's report confirming she was 4 weeks pregnant. But, she said she did not want to receive the usual rejection that comes from a guy when she tells the guy she is pregnant. Therefore, she just removed it. She said, she told herself that when she tells me I got her pregnant, and I start to act up, she will just tell me that she has already taken it off.

Since that day, I have not being myself. I do not know if I should continue with her. She has a big problem. She assumes too much. She concludes too much. She always tries to act like she is smarter than everyone in the room. Before you say A, she concludes you will also say B and C. A part of me wants my application for transfer to be denied.

What should I do? Mature advice only.