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Victor Ibeh: How My Older Lady Lover Dumped Me After 2 Weeks - Romance - Nairaland

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Victor Ibeh: How My Older Lady Lover Dumped Me After 2 Weeks by ChangeIsCostant: 4:03am On Dec 09, 2017
A counselor and writer, Victor Ibeh, has shared a story of how he dated an older lady which lasted for two weeks before she broke up with him. Victor Ibeh, who revealed that he "had" an attraction to older women for some reasons - narrated his ordeal in order to warn people to stop testing or threatening their partners with breakup. Below is what he shared on Facebook;

At a certain time last year, I had a relationship that lasted for two weeks. We were friends before we suddenly got romantically involved. We looked like we could do so much together, so I was excited about the relationship.

She was older and that was a plus for me. I "had" this attraction to older ladies. Apart from the fact that sex with them is usually extraordinary, there is also the absence of drama and childishness. When it comes to drama, I am very impatient. I believe that an adult should know what he/she wants and avoid instability, pranks and mind games.

This is not to say that younger ladies are not gifted with these same qualities, but from experience, younger ladies can be very unrealistic. I have had so much experiences in life. I think it is beneath me at this time to have some kind of mundane romance with ineptitude. So, I just seek after people like me who have also had experiences and have advanced beyond that childish state.

However, because there is really no hard and fast rule of love and emotional transactions, I have seen so-called adults seeking succour in high school love wherein they abdicate responsibilities and immerse themselves in the muddy waters of immaturity.

The allusion to high school love, above, is just an obiter in this submission. I do not possess the intentions of expanding it's meaning and ambit in this write-up. But, on a later date, I will do a more detailed teaching or say, an explanation on that subject.

Everything about our relationship was going as we desire until one day. I called her in the morning as usual, she didn't take calls. I called 5 times but there was no response. I assumed that she was very busy with work.

I tried to send a message on Whatsapp, but I realised she had blocked me on Whatsapp. I just calmed my pussy and went to work.

At noon, I put another call across and she picked. She sounded like someone in the midst of something. I greeted her and asked how she was. She responded. Then I told her that I have been trying to reach her on the phone to no avail. I quickly mentioned that she blocked me on whatsapp. She replied that she did it intentionally, that she wasn't interested in the relationship any longer. I was shocked, because we didn't have any issues before that day.

I pleaded with her to tell me why she took that decision. She told me that she had made her decision and that she wasn't under any obligation to give me her reasons. I kept pleading with her on the phone. I just wanted to know why, in case there was something bad I did. I am someone who is constantly improving myself. I didn't have a problem with the breakup. I just wanted to know why, so, I can work on myself, especially if her grievance was legitimate.

I called back after some hours and met the same response. It took me 24 hours to process what happened. I was hurt, not by the break up, but the manner and then her attitude and also because I esteemed her above such childishness.

After 24 hours I let it go and moved on. I love my peace of mind. Some days later, she unblocked me on Whatsapp and sent a message. She began to reestablish some sort of friendship. It wasn't a problem for me. I was cool. We could be friends. At that time I had withdrawn my emotions totally. After a while of talking with me, she broached the subject of relationship to me. This time she was asking for the relationship and was telling me that she was sorry about her previous action. In summary, she tried everything possible to get us back into a relationship. I was adamant. I was done. That's the thing about me. When I pull out my emotions I don't send them back.

This experience is not an isolated experience. I have encountered ladies who would intentionally break up with you so you can beg them to come back to you. That is their own way of confirming their worth.

Unfortunately, it doesn't work on me. You cannot give me drama because you want me to validate your self-worth. I really can't.. If you don't believe in your worth, I can help you boost your self esteem but it doesn't have to be under an atmosphere of drama and mind games.

A time comes when you just have to let go of high school love and embrace adult love.

If there is an issue, discuss it. Look for a solution, but don't come with threats of break up. I kid you not. If you break up with me, I just accept it. I will not start begging. If you tell me my offence without threat, I will be remorseful and offer my apologies.

One of the ways people torture themselves emotionally is by breaking up physically, when they haven't detached themselves emotionally. It is torture and most of the time, you will come back to that partner. Don't be in a haste to breakup with someone if you are sure that you don't really want to break up. Stop testing people with breakup.

Very many times in my life, people have broken up with me, and I just said "thank you" and walked away.

When they saw the way I responded they went on to accuse me that I never loved them, but that's not true. I actually loved them but I love my peace and sanity more.

I am a very emotional person and I use my emotional energy for almost everything I do. So, I find it difficult dealing with drama and insanity. They will accuse me that I never valued the relationship and that was why I was quick to walk. I walked out of a marriage with just my books, piano and a few clothes. I left everything, I left my son that I loved so much, because nobody will grant me custody of a toddler. There is nothing I cannot walk away from. The most important thing for me in this world is my peace and sanity.

I place so much value on myself. It is not my fault that you place less value on yourself and are willing to accept bullshit. Don't assume that because you are willing to take rubbish, I should be willing too.

Let me find beer and drink fess. Please, if you don't agree with what I just wrote, take your disagreement to Jevinik and be useful to your stomach


Source; https://www.nationalhelm.co/2017/12/nigerian-writer-dated-older-lady-two-weeks-narrates-ordeal-photo.html

146 Likes 21 Shares

Re: Victor Ibeh: How My Older Lady Lover Dumped Me After 2 Weeks by ChangeIsCostant: 4:04am On Dec 09, 2017
cc; lalasticlala
Re: Victor Ibeh: How My Older Lady Lover Dumped Me After 2 Weeks by Nobody: 4:04am On Dec 09, 2017
All this epistle on top another man Pikin wey d shine old Congo?

123 Likes 4 Shares

Re: Victor Ibeh: How My Older Lady Lover Dumped Me After 2 Weeks by Nobody: 4:13am On Dec 09, 2017
I could relate, but you live and you learn cry cry cry

10 Likes

Re: Victor Ibeh: How My Older Lady Lover Dumped Me After 2 Weeks by ebukahandsome(m): 4:57am On Dec 09, 2017
This guy na correct guy

140 Likes 3 Shares

Re: Victor Ibeh: How My Older Lady Lover Dumped Me After 2 Weeks by Nobody: 5:03am On Dec 09, 2017
Who cares? Be writing rubbish upandan
No mind me o na better news wey I go fit fire bashing I dey wait for but I can't help but comment here.

These children any small thing dem.don post online. Very soon we go dey see posts like

"about to shit...please push for me in your prayers"
"Mess so sweet, I think I need to eat beans often"

14 Likes 1 Share

Re: Victor Ibeh: How My Older Lady Lover Dumped Me After 2 Weeks by 13ShadesOfMay(m): 5:06am On Dec 09, 2017
A nice write up filled with some reasonable points that I can relate to. At some point in time, we tend to be worried how some folks we care 'bouh react and behave to certain situations. most times, I just live and let live!!!

28 Likes 2 Shares

Re: Victor Ibeh: How My Older Lady Lover Dumped Me After 2 Weeks by jeffizy(m): 5:29am On Dec 09, 2017
Payback served hot.
Men don't deserve emotional torture. We have a heart too.

29 Likes

Re: Victor Ibeh: How My Older Lady Lover Dumped Me After 2 Weeks by rawpadgin(m): 5:54am On Dec 09, 2017
Nice write-up but dude look gay sha undecided

25 Likes

Re: Victor Ibeh: How My Older Lady Lover Dumped Me After 2 Weeks by babablogger: 5:54am On Dec 09, 2017
I don't know why you laid emphasis on Older Woman, someone younger could have done same.

16 Likes

Re: Victor Ibeh: How My Older Lady Lover Dumped Me After 2 Weeks by Nobody: 6:24am On Dec 09, 2017
Boss Man!! You are the real MVP!! I like it when men act like men. Keep repping d male folks. cool

27 Likes 2 Shares

Re: Victor Ibeh: How My Older Lady Lover Dumped Me After 2 Weeks by ehbellsho(m): 6:36am On Dec 09, 2017
babablogger:
I don't know why you laid emphasis on Older Woman, someone younger could have done same.

GBAM! Fact

12 Likes 1 Share

Re: Victor Ibeh: How My Older Lady Lover Dumped Me After 2 Weeks by habsydiamond(m): 6:54am On Dec 09, 2017
this guy Na sharp guy...he know say old ladies no dey get choice other than to date any guy wey come der way because dem don turn black market. the babe sef funny, after the guy don chop her underground finish she come dey form break up...for this matter Na the guy gain ooo. o ti lu girl yen ni jibiti punna straight....

17 Likes 1 Share

Re: Victor Ibeh: How My Older Lady Lover Dumped Me After 2 Weeks by kelechiodo(m): 7:05am On Dec 09, 2017
There is nothing I cannot walk away from grin cheesy cheesy
This guy is funny. Hope u won't meet one that will tie you with rope one day.
But I totally agree with you that peace of mind and sanity is non negotiable.

26 Likes 3 Shares

Re: Victor Ibeh: How My Older Lady Lover Dumped Me After 2 Weeks by psalmistkakah(m): 7:09am On Dec 09, 2017
No mind these ladies, na so one wan try me, instantly before her very eyes I port to anoda girl and the relationship went well...there are beta ways of measuring love jareee

6 Likes

Re: Victor Ibeh: How My Older Lady Lover Dumped Me After 2 Weeks by Ekehwinz: 7:15am On Dec 09, 2017
This guy na MAN!!

23 Likes

Re: Victor Ibeh: How My Older Lady Lover Dumped Me After 2 Weeks by Gofwane(m): 7:20am On Dec 09, 2017
13ShadesOfMay:
A nice write up filled with some reasonable points that I can relate to. At some point in time, we tend to be worried how some folks we care 'bouh react and behave to certain situations. most times, I just live and let live!!!
you just spoke my mind, word to word!!

4 Likes

Re: Victor Ibeh: How My Older Lady Lover Dumped Me After 2 Weeks by pocohantas(f): 7:26am On Dec 09, 2017
I think something actually made her angry, but she is the type that likes to dwell on things. They'll wanna turn you into a mind reader...
He did well jare grin

"They will accuse me that I never valued the relationship and that was why I was quick to walk."

Preach brother.

49 Likes 2 Shares

Re: Victor Ibeh: How My Older Lady Lover Dumped Me After 2 Weeks by utenwuson: 7:27am On Dec 09, 2017
the guy makes sense

3 Likes

Re: Victor Ibeh: How My Older Lady Lover Dumped Me After 2 Weeks by punisha: 8:09am On Dec 09, 2017
lamentations of a loser who's looking for who'd make his life easier. you can walk out of anything and have been dumped many times and u say u prefer ur peace n sanity....whilst ur post be making sense to your fellow losers, I suggest you go and work on yourself. you've got issues. The young lady like the others took a walk of no return. stop consoling urself with imaginary lies of how she's wanting u back. u ain't a man yet. Grow a pair of balls, find a girl your age or you're older than and date, try being responsible, stop looking for the ones that will pay your bills and u get freebies from.

26 Likes 6 Shares

Re: Victor Ibeh: How My Older Lady Lover Dumped Me After 2 Weeks by Ericaikince(m): 8:11am On Dec 09, 2017
grin

1 Like

Re: Victor Ibeh: How My Older Lady Lover Dumped Me After 2 Weeks by BruncleZuma: 8:11am On Dec 09, 2017
grin grin grin grin

Gigolo...make SARS catch you first, dey form Pizarro.

grin grin grin grin

8 Likes

Re: Victor Ibeh: How My Older Lady Lover Dumped Me After 2 Weeks by jerflakes(m): 8:12am On Dec 09, 2017
Women are their own problems

12 Likes

Re: Victor Ibeh: How My Older Lady Lover Dumped Me After 2 Weeks by thorpido(m): 8:15am On Dec 09, 2017
You walked away from your son?That's cruel.

7 Likes

Re: Victor Ibeh: How My Older Lady Lover Dumped Me After 2 Weeks by coalcoal1(m): 8:15am On Dec 09, 2017
ok
Re: Victor Ibeh: How My Older Lady Lover Dumped Me After 2 Weeks by obowunmi(m): 8:15am On Dec 09, 2017
He found what he was looking for to say the least.
Re: Victor Ibeh: How My Older Lady Lover Dumped Me After 2 Weeks by Nobody: 8:16am On Dec 09, 2017
punisha:
lamentations of a loser who's looking for who'd make his life easier. you can walk out of anything and have been dumped many times and u say u prefer ur peace n sanity....whilst ur post be making sense to your fellow losers, I suggest you go and work on yourself. you've got issues. The young lady like the others took a walk of no return. stop consoling urself with imaginary lies of how she's wanting u back. u ain't a man yet. Grow a pair of balls, find a girl your age or you're older than and date, try being responsible, stop looking for the ones that will pay your bills and u get freebies from.
Lol

3 Likes

Re: Victor Ibeh: How My Older Lady Lover Dumped Me After 2 Weeks by nonut: 8:16am On Dec 09, 2017
Guys who beg when women break up with them are Bleep boys.
They're not doing it because they care so much, they just wanna continue shining the Congo.
Ladies don't understand this though. They believe the guy can't do it without them, that's why he's begging.
Real men don't beg. They just take it hard and move on.

29 Likes

Re: Victor Ibeh: How My Older Lady Lover Dumped Me After 2 Weeks by iluvpomo(m): 8:17am On Dec 09, 2017
...Apart from the fact that sex with them is usually extraordinary...

Gilf fantasies shocked

1 Like 1 Share

Re: Victor Ibeh: How My Older Lady Lover Dumped Me After 2 Weeks by enemyofprogress: 8:18am On Dec 09, 2017
Yeye boy,instead of him to go back to her and punish her buraciously with his prick,so as to make her cry like a baby

6 Likes

Re: Victor Ibeh: How My Older Lady Lover Dumped Me After 2 Weeks by NCP: 8:18am On Dec 09, 2017
Sugar Mummy Blues

10 Likes 2 Shares

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