₦airaland Forum

ghettochild:
My advice is after the court case, move out of that apartment..
I think its best u even do that b4 d court case..
If this bitch kills u.... she will only go to jail for about 15yrs while ur life is wasted...
Think bout this..
My guy relocate ooo..
Forget d pikin
It what she wanted from u.....
U b naija man...
Look back home find a wife..
Or u look for a fellow nigerian like u over there
Can hook u up with a university friend of mine..
She's single sef.
Holla me +27604266943

na waoh why u dey give the guy ur girlfriend number.

Oh ok

signature2012:
@kevinbabyface1 and ghettochild,kindly modify each others post and remove your phone numbers plz.

khiaa:
I would love to hear her side of the story. What did you do? You know there are three sides to the story, your side, her side, and the truth.

khiaa please and please am begging you ,please please my kneels down, we need to talk, I called him and we both talked...

am seriously begging you this day let talk on whatsapp just consider for now even if I haven't reply to you what you wanna hear..

Kelvinbabyface1:
Hello guys,

I travelled out of the country to Boston for a course about a year ago. As a smart guy, i discharged all my Naija female packages and ventured into the 'New world' a free man. However, to cut the long story short, i met a lady of Jamaican descent that i fell in love with. It was love at first sight, and we supposedly bonded. She invited me to her church, introduced him to her family, and even suggested they get married weeks after meeting, supposedly to make us to be together without sin. As a Naija guy in a Trump infected society, i gladly agreed. To me, this was too good to be true, and i felt on top of the world. However, like they say, if its too good to be true, it probably isn't. The first signs that something was wrong was when i realised her mother requested for a ring of high value to give her. The ring i brought was, according to the girls mother, not of quality value, and enquired how i got it.Na so the girl just start to de para for me o.. Back to back nagging... i venture into an expensive ring.And this was the first red flag. Next, girl agreed to still go ahead with the marriage, but started using foul language with me o, which i tried to caution her against using on several occasions. Within this period, the girl got pregnant, and since we were gonna get marriage soon, it didn't matter. However, her behaviour became irritating day by day, always trying to dictate to me o and all. Then it happened one day... We had a big argument and she said she was done. This was a day to our engagement, but she said we were gonna end the relationship. After intervention from the mother and grandmother, she changed her mind.

Overtime, the crazy back and forths continued... She's done, pastor and family come between them and she changes her mind. All the while, i had started doubting her mental stability, and was concerned that her unstable nature could just lead to a divorce anytime, which was bad.. Eventually, we had a terrible argument, where she called the corps on me.. thank God I'm legal with my Student visa!!! she promised to make sure i pay for child support even though we are not married. She also promised to make sure she deports me back, and make my life miserable. Mind u, the girl is in the US Navy and studied Law. This argument was the straw that broke the camels back, i just had to end it,especially with later threats of her killing me. Now, I'm concerned about her threats, and the prospect of paying child support till the baby is 18. What do you advise him to do biko?

I asked for advice and was adviced to marry her... Story continues......

We got married, and she practically turned him to a slave...if i paraventure ask her a question...she will just keep insulting me and my family plus my country for no reason... like you deaf, you going bk to your crazy country... you're a sperm donor.. do as i say you asking questions like a bitch... All this is after doing everything im the house and also wake him up in the middle of the night to prepare food for her... which he did without complaining. The one that break the camel back was when i told her all what i have been doing for you... at least i deserve accolades or thank you.. she grabbed me by the neck and she took her hands off. Then i knew it's finished.... i was subjected to sleep on the bare ground that night... and the next day i was looking at resolving what ever grudges she had on me... i was trying to talk to her.... the next thing she did... was to scream at me to leave her...then she called 911 on me. And they took me out of the house. That was super extreme. Then i knew I'm on my own. I slept on the street in the dark in BOSTON. This time i knew i had to fight back. I reported the physical assault incidence... and now i have been informed that the case is going through hearing this month, however, she's not aware of any court case.

AND THE ANNOYING PART IS THAT SHE REFUSED TO FILE FOR ME!!!


I don't know what to do... i have all the messages where she called me a sperm donor and the rest... i even have hospital records that shows I'm emotionally distressed with the traumatic event.

What should i do.... Matured advice please.

First I sympathize with you on what you are going through.

Second, the good news is that you are eligible to get your green card through VAWA act (violence against women act). The act was originally intended for women experiencing violence in the hands of their US citizen spouses but has since expanded to include both genders as violence can go both ways. Now, both men and women married to US citizen spouses can file on that basis if they experienced violence in the hands of their US citizen spouse, which in your case you clearly did. Be sure to keep ALL evidence of the violence (physical, if any, emotional etc.) you went through. Do not leave any piece of evidence out. Here in the US, threats of murder are taken very seriously and if you have not yet, you need to report that to the police to have solid evidence of that threat to support your VAWA application. Also, if need be, get a restraining order against your spouse which helps to solidify your application when you file. You can file for your green card by yourself if you can understand the USCIS forms and whatnot but if you cannot do get an immigration lawyer to help you file your application with the right supporting evidence. Your green card will take about a year to come out and it will be the permanent green card (the 10-year one, as opposed to the initial conditional 2-year one you would have gotten had your spouse filed), but in the meantime they would give you a work permit to be working with. With the situation of things at this point, you don't need your spouse to file for you. Majority of Americans barely know about this law/path to green card and it is highly certain that your spouse doesn't know of it either. Your only mistake is the child involved between you two = child support payments for 18 years, that is if your spouse puts you on child support.

Hang in there.

https://www.uscis.gov/green-card/green-card-vawa-self-petitioner

http://www.alllaw.com/articles/nolo/us-immigration/proving-abuse-green-card-under-vawa.html

bigfrancis21:
First I sympathize with you on what you are going through.

Second, the good news is that you are eligible to get your green card through VAWA act (violence against women act). The act was originally intended for women experiencing violence in the hands of their US citizen spouses but has since expanded to include both genders as violence can go both ways. Now, both men and women married to US citizen spouses can file on that basis if they experienced violence in the hands of their US citizen spouse, which in your case you clearly did. Be sure to keep ALL evidence of the violence (physical, if any, emotional etc.) you went through. Do not leave any piece of evidence out. Here in the US, threats of murder are taken very seriously and if you have not yet, you need to report that to the police to have solid evidence of that threat to support your VAWA application. Also, if need be, get a restraining order against your spouse which helps to solidify your application when you file. You can file for your green card by yourself if you can understand the USCIS forms and whatnot but if you cannot do get an immigration lawyer to help you file your application with the right supporting evidence. Your green card will take about a year to come out and it will be the permanent green card (the 10-year one, as opposed to the initial conditional 2-year one you would have gotten had your spouse filed), but in the meantime they would give you a work permit to be working with. With the situation of things at this point, you don't need your spouse to file for you. Majority of Americans barely know about this law/path to green card and it is highly certain that your spouse doesn't know of it either. Your only mistake is the child involved between you two = child support payments for 18 years, that is if your spouse puts you on child support.

Hang in there.

https://www.uscis.gov/green-card/green-card-vawa-self-petitioner

Very good advice.
I think with this one, you ca trust nigerians to game the system.

Expect a lot of naija guys, who have been previously avoiding akata, to start vehemently dating these broken, unstable creatures in expectation of abuse. n fact they will look for the maddest of the mad with tattoo everywhere to do the thing so that they can quickly switch to VAWA mode

Naija folks will overdo everything until it get shut down. confarm.

2buffagain:
Very good advice.
I think with this one, you ca trust nigerians to game the system.

Expect a lot of naija guys, who have been previously avoiding akata, to start vehemently dating these broken, unstable creatures in expectation of abuse. n fact they will look for the maddest of the mad with tattoo everywhere to do the thing so that they can quickly switch to VAWA mode

Naija folks will overdo everything until it get shut down. confarm.

my Brother don't blame naija guys too much. This country has turned to hell in recent times. As soon as I get outta here,I don't care to use wawa or vava to get what I want

bigfrancis21:
First I sympathize with you on what you are going through.

Second, the good news is that you are eligible to get your green card through VAWA act (violence against women act). The act was originally intended for women experiencing violence in the hands of their US citizen spouses but has since expanded to include both genders as violence can go both ways. Now, both men and women married to US citizen spouses can file on that basis if they experienced violence in the hands of their US citizen spouse, which in your case you clearly did. Be sure to keep ALL evidence of the violence (physical, if any, emotional etc.) you went through. Do not leave any piece of evidence out. Here in the US, threats of murder are taken very seriously and if you have not yet, you need to report that to the police to have solid evidence of that threat to support your VAWA application. Also, if need be, get a restraining order against your spouse which helps to solidify your application when you file. You can file for your green card by yourself if you can understand the USCIS forms and whatnot but if you cannot do get an immigration lawyer to help you file your application with the right supporting evidence. Your green card will take about a year to come out and it will be the permanent green card (the 10-year one, as opposed to the initial conditional 2-year one you would have gotten had your spouse filed), but in the meantime they would give you a work permit to be working with. With the situation of things at this point, you don't need your spouse to file for you. Majority of Americans barely know about this law/path to green card and it is highly certain that your spouse doesn't know of it either. Your only mistake is the child involved between you two = child support payments for 18 years, that is if your spouse puts you on child support.

Hang in there.

https://www.uscis.gov/green-card/green-card-vawa-self-petitioner

http://www.alllaw.com/articles/nolo/us-immigration/proving-abuse-green-card-under-vawa.html

So much info in one package Sir....
.
Idikwa too much

Martin0:
khiaa please and please am begging you ,please please my kneels down, we need to talk, I called him and we both talked...

am seriously begging you this day let talk on whatsapp just consider for now even if I haven't reply to you what you wanna hear..

Hmmmmmm! I'm on to you. He is you.

That's how one nearly killed me in Mississippi
Naija girls calm Abeg
If you see craze you go believe
Take heart bro
Watch your six and connect with other paddy men from motherland

Truckpusher:
Says who ? African men can even abandon their own shadow for another puccy.

LMAO You guys better learn to keep that pedar in your pants.

khiaa:
Hmmmmmm! I'm on to you. He is you.

no no no nobody is me, this is just me, the me that has always be me, it hasn't changed..

But circumstances will always continue to exist, if I should come out now to say I love you, then trust me, I most be lying and also lying to you..

like I said before now, I have a friend who I wanted you both to connect together, but his not into Nairaland thing, and it seems maybe you don't want a mere complete stranger, basically I decided withing myself to keep to my friendship with you..

Then again the op needs help, I can't just help completely just alone, so I decided to call you out so we can talk about it and see how we can advise him, who kmows either of us may find you worthy more than gold but then again I made my first uplines open to you just because of op, I don't know him that much but I believe with the little conversation we had I have sensed a rare complete sincerity in him and am willing to in my little way of contribution stick with him in these little times his in shiit..

khiaa give me ur number or choose every means you will like me to get it, and am gonna call you..

Thanks alot Sir, my blood pressure was on the borderline when i was going through alp this....

Now i can smile.... the child support thing. Is it until i sign birth certificate before my name will be pursued on child support. Or if she just give them my name... i will start paying immediately.

bigfrancis21:
First I sympathize with you on what you are going through.

Second, the good news is that you are eligible to get your green card through VAWA act (violence against women act). The act was originally intended for women experiencing violence in the hands of their US citizen spouses but has since expanded to include both genders as violence can go both ways. Now, both men and women married to US citizen spouses can file on that basis if they experienced violence in the hands of their US citizen spouse, which in your case you clearly did. Be sure to keep ALL evidence of the violence (physical, if any, emotional etc.) you went through. Do not leave any piece of evidence out. Here in the US, threats of murder are taken very seriously and if you have not yet, you need to report that to the police to have solid evidence of that threat to support your VAWA application. Also, if need be, get a restraining order against your spouse which helps to solidify your application when you file. You can file for your green card by yourself if you can understand the USCIS forms and whatnot but if you cannot do get an immigration lawyer to help you file your application with the right supporting evidence. Your green card will take about a year to come out and it will be the permanent green card (the 10-year one, as opposed to the initial conditional 2-year one you would have gotten had your spouse filed), but in the meantime they would give you a work permit to be working with. With the situation of things at this point, you don't need your spouse to file for you. Majority of Americans barely know about this law/path to green card and it is highly certain that your spouse doesn't know of it either. Your only mistake is the child involved between you two = child support payments for 18 years, that is if your spouse puts you on child support.

Hang in there.

https://www.uscis.gov/green-card/green-card-vawa-self-petitioner

http://www.alllaw.com/articles/nolo/us-immigration/proving-abuse-green-card-under-vawa.html

I cant keep up with the going back and forth changes of him and I. Who is this story really about?

And theres 2 sides to every story. Make that 3. His hers and the truth.

If you don't feel like advising. It's ok. Obviously you aren't patient enough to read it to the fullest.

The Op is the person involved.

Abang52:
That's how one nearly killed me in Mississippi
Naija girls calm Abeg
If you see craze you go believe
Take heart bro
Watch your six and connect with other paddy men from motherland

Eehh? I thought u naija guys think we r d worst set of women on earth? Lmao una never see something

Actually, I did. But the writing is inconsistent with the different pronouns used, so...
Like others have said, you must have documentation to support your claims. If you are really in fear of your life, a restraint should be filed. But I am not in support of abandoning your child.
As far as child support is concerned, some states will order child support to be paid in a divorce case,no matter what.
Still not entirely convinced about this story, Sorry.

hiawathia1981:
Actually, I did. But the writing is inconsistent with the different pronouns used, so...
Like others have said, you must have documentation to support your claims. If you are really in fear of your life, a restraint should be filed. But I am not in support of abandoning your child.
As far as child support is concerned, some states will order child support to be paid in a divorce case,no matter what.
Still not entirely convinced about this story, Sorry.

Some states also have a ceiling on the amount of child support that can be garnished no matter the income of the payer. That is the custodial parent cannot get any higher than a certain amount deemed reasonably enough (say $3k per month for example) from the non-custodial parent even if the latter earns $1m per month. Also states like Wisconsin favor joint custody of the child rather than giving one parent sole custody (and the other parent visitation rights) and that way no one has to pay child support to the other parent. The op may decide to move around to states where such laws are more favorable to him to take advantage of these laws.

OP is this you and her?


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eZxoL0gPN-0

Get a camera to record her when issuing her threats. It will b a good evidence in court

Kelvinbabyface1:
If you don't feel like advising. It's ok. Obviously you aren't patient enough to read it to the fullest.

The Op is the person involved.

how far bro?
how did it all go?

khiaa:
Hmmmmmm! I'm on to you. He is you.

.hey hope you fine, been a long time no see

khiaa:
Hmmmmmm! I'm on to you. He is you.

..


.hey hope you fine, been a long time no see

she has told you all you are to her, just a sperm donor. shikina.

Kelvinbabyface1:
One day she fit lie on top me say i wan kill am o.... After the court case it's better i relocate. Or she go use gun kill me.

She's in the U.S.army brother. I have really bought market. If she's unable to achieve her aim of deporting me...

She could get rid of me o

Na wa o, wetin you do am?

2buffagain:
Very good advice.
I think with this one, you ca trust nigerians to game the system.

Expect a lot of naija guys, who have been previously avoiding akata, to start vehemently dating these broken, unstable creatures in expectation of abuse. n fact they will look for the maddest of the mad with tattoo everywhere to do the thing so that they can quickly switch to VAWA mode

Naija folks will overdo everything until it get shut down. confarm.

LMAO. This one weak me. 'The maddest of the mad with tattoos'.