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Sex Na Food (Pidgin Comedy Edition) Story Of A Rugged Guy By Youngzubi - Literature (21) - Nairaland

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Life Of A Rugged Guy +21 / Naija Yahoo Life(get Rich And Die Young, Pidgin EDITION) By Youngzubi / I Fit Be Second Jesus(sex Na Food 2)the Return Of Spana By Youngzubi (2) (3) (4)

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Re: Sex Na Food (Pidgin Comedy Edition) Story Of A Rugged Guy By Youngzubi by astute28: 9:04pm On Aug 06, 2018
an adage say if children enter place wey him supposed not to enter fear go catch am. thumb up youngzubi
Re: Sex Na Food (Pidgin Comedy Edition) Story Of A Rugged Guy By Youngzubi by Youngzubi(m): 9:05pm On Aug 06, 2018
razmub:
Weldone Youngzubi, as una don make ma oga send me outta office so, na ur house i bin dey come naw.
Thumbs up man. Abeg holla me for the next update

Lolzgrin

1 Like

Re: Sex Na Food (Pidgin Comedy Edition) Story Of A Rugged Guy By Youngzubi by Estellar: 9:08pm On Aug 06, 2018
Youngzubi:



u'er welcomed!!
thanks for the comment
please do go and vote for me

God blessed
Done

1 Like

Re: Sex Na Food (Pidgin Comedy Edition) Story Of A Rugged Guy By Youngzubi by Youngzubi(m): 9:23pm On Aug 06, 2018
Speakout03:
Abeg who sabi Our Lords prayer send Sparta the link,, Sparta no go kill me with laugh. Mr young update is short, just add small again, is beg i beg



biko send am o!!

1 Like

Re: Sex Na Food (Pidgin Comedy Edition) Story Of A Rugged Guy By Youngzubi by Youngzubi(m): 9:25pm On Aug 06, 2018
Estellar:
Done
e sure for u jare tem!! tem!! tem!! peace out!!!

still ur guy youngzubi

1 Like

Re: Sex Na Food (Pidgin Comedy Edition) Story Of A Rugged Guy By Youngzubi by Youngzubi(m): 9:39pm On Aug 06, 2018
Danchoco:
I hail ooo...thumb up


i hail sir!

1 Like

Re: Sex Na Food (Pidgin Comedy Edition) Story Of A Rugged Guy By Youngzubi by zeezeegal(m): 9:59pm On Aug 06, 2018
Waiting

1 Like

Re: Sex Na Food (Pidgin Comedy Edition) Story Of A Rugged Guy By Youngzubi by Estellar: 10:23pm On Aug 06, 2018
Youngzubi:


e sure for u jare tem!! tem!! tem!! peace out!!!


still ur guy youngzubi
e sure us all

1 Like

Re: Sex Na Food (Pidgin Comedy Edition) Story Of A Rugged Guy By Youngzubi by makavelli47(m): 10:44pm On Aug 06, 2018
pls vote youngzubi for droping dem update back to back

1 Like

Re: Sex Na Food (Pidgin Comedy Edition) Story Of A Rugged Guy By Youngzubi by Holywizard: 11:28pm On Aug 06, 2018
U are welcome
Youngzubi:



and i just like u for one thing

beige appreciative!! thanks my man

Wat i hate most is wen people read without dropping something for the writer

1 Like

Re: Sex Na Food (Pidgin Comedy Edition) Story Of A Rugged Guy By Youngzubi by uekejiuba(m): 7:02am On Aug 07, 2018
Youngzubi i don dey follow this tori from the begining wey u start,but i no comment.no bi say i no won comment ooooo....bicos i wan comment everything at this same time....bros time no dey...bros i get exam to write but i no read bicos of your tori...i dey read your tori like say i wan write 21unit course..bros abeg this your tori dey cancerous...bros see na all of us don get cancer of the glue to the tori...abeg update....na only update fit cure us ooooo...

1 Like

Re: Sex Na Food (Pidgin Comedy Edition) Story Of A Rugged Guy By Youngzubi by donaldphilipizu(m): 7:24am On Aug 07, 2018
uekejiuba:
Youngzubi i don dey follow this tori from the begining wey u start,but i no comment.no bi say i no won comment ooooo....bicos i wan comment everything at this same time....bros time no dey...bros i get exam to write but i no read bicos of your tori...i dey read your tori like say i wan write 21unit course..bros abeg this your tori dey cancerous...bros see na all of us don get cancer of the glue to the tori...abeg update....na only update fit cure us ooooo...

na so man.

2 Likes

Re: Sex Na Food (Pidgin Comedy Edition) Story Of A Rugged Guy By Youngzubi by Youngzubi(m): 9:21am On Aug 07, 2018
uekejiuba:
Youngzubi i don dey follow this tori from the begining wey u start,but i no comment.no bi say i no won comment ooooo....bicos i wan comment everything at this same time....bros time no dey...bros i get exam to write but i no read bicos of your tori...i dey read your tori like say i wan write 21unit course..bros abeg this your tori dey cancerous...bros see na all of us don get cancer of the glue to the tori...abeg update....na only update fit cure us ooooo...


wow! wow thanks man for the love i appreciate bro


i won't let u down!

1 Like

Re: Sex Na Food (Pidgin Comedy Edition) Story Of A Rugged Guy By Youngzubi by Sweezy1(m): 11:28am On Aug 07, 2018
my guy u try very much...

1 Like

Re: Sex Na Food (Pidgin Comedy Edition) Story Of A Rugged Guy By Youngzubi by Youngzubi(m): 12:04pm On Aug 07, 2018
hello! update would come late today something came up and i really need to handle it


so bear with me

thanks for ur understanding gawd bless!!!


still ur guy youngzubi

1 Like

Re: Sex Na Food (Pidgin Comedy Edition) Story Of A Rugged Guy By Youngzubi by rowdymind(m): 1:41pm On Aug 07, 2018
Youngzubi I Dan Show Back, Spana Dan Enter One Chance And Big Mama Sef Too Fetish
Re: Sex Na Food (Pidgin Comedy Edition) Story Of A Rugged Guy By Youngzubi by Youngzubi(m): 10:38pm On Aug 07, 2018
Episode .............27




the spider gang
---------------------------------------







as we turn look big mama she motion us to follow her,Chai fear nah bad thing,see as all of us just dey drag who go be the last peson wey go stand for back,trust spata him nor even send as him use all the strength wey dey him body fight go stand for back-back



big mama dey front as we waka follow her for back,we reach the backyard nahim big mama waka go open something wey be like pit,e wide like mad,we move close go meet her


she remove her high heel shoe then face us and yan"jump in after one another



watin!!.......spata shout


ah! e be like say we go begin go back ma,mama abeg i nor do again.........erotic yan


spana!!.........big mama shout

Err! ma!!..............i yan


jump in..........she yan


ma u say watin?.......... i yan as i swallow spit


spana! u nor deaf,so comma enter inside this thing,she yan but the fear wey hold me double,how normal peson go talk dat kin thing

i manage waka go front after all na man i be,so onto say na man wey i be i gather mind put one leg inside the pit nahim i come notice say step dey inside the pit


i smile as ah yan my guys say better step dey inside o!,then begin go down as others follow me,we follow the step dey go down till we burst out for underground cave

big mama waka come front,the cave get one small opening wey be like passage,for the passage e get long rope wey dem take cross am,so as big mama reach dia she bendown use back enter inside the cave


all of us begin do thesame thing till we complete inside


inside the cave dark light midnight,nah only candle light we line up be the only source of light for dia


welcome! to my kingdom!,the great den of the ogboni's,here is the secret place wia the powerful one's dwell,only those who seek power and protection enters here so calm ur spirit for u'er in the right place



we just dey look every corner dey fin the peson wey dey yan since,no show at all nah only the voice we just dey hear,i look big mama but she nor even show any sign of fear at all,she just bow her head dey look ground


like magic one man wey black like charcoal appear from no wia,he short come Wear pure red cloth with long stick for him hand


dont be afraid young men for what u came to seek is what u'll get........the devil yan



i greet u the great one....big mama greet


my daughter u'er welcome


em! the great one......big mama call


yes!......the devil yan



we don arrive,nah the boys be dis,nah to give dem protection and bind the gang be the thing wey carry us come....big mama kukuma explain give the devil



hmm!!,oya make we start no time to wast,lineup!! and begin comot una clothes....the devil yan as we obey sharp sharp like say if we delay our life go kpemeh



as we comot our clothes finish,nah only boxers remain,the devil begin do him incantation,one big box appear for our front as the man command us to begin enter it one by one


as the gang leader,e nor easy to be a leader o,becos anything wey dem wan do nah me go first do am

nor dey waste time!!.......the devil bark as him eye turn red



chaiii!! i comot breath den waka go wia the box dey


u go enter and sidon inside till i open am.........he yan



i go fit breath inside?........i ask the short devil


nor dey ask question!'obey!" all u need to do nah to just obey jeje!.........he yan


Chai na wich kin thing be dis eh!,i shuk one leg inside then the second one as smoke begin comot from the box


sidon inside........the short devil yan,i obey ah sidon nahim the man waka come close am


i begin wonder watin go happen next,like say dem jazz me i fall enter better sleep

i begin dream wia ah stand inside one thick bush,inside the bush nah only six threes dey dia

as i look them e come be like say dem dey talk even some of dem get branches wey be like hand


i still dey wonder how ah take enter the place wen four men appear from no wia


immediately i sight dem nah to tear race i won do becos dem hold raffle gun with cutlass for their hand but my leg pin for ground,i try with all my power to run for wia,even those four men begin laff as dem match come meet me


i begin beg dem but e be like say i just dey follow my shadows yan as one of dem raise him cutlass and samah it on my head towwaa!!!


the biggest three among those six tree begin cry as red thing begin comot from the branch,then i touch my head wia the man nack me the cutlass no sign of blood at all talkless of wound e just be like say nah foam dem use hit me


the man with gun shift go back as him position him raffle fo my face and fire it,thesame thing happen again as the three begin cry dey comot something like blood from him branch

good now ur ode-eshi is hundred percent complete,go back u'er now protected ur body strong pass iron now goooo!!!!!!!



i wake up inside the box as sweat full my body,com out!!...........the short devil yan as him open the box


i jump out from the box as i notice changes for my body,no fear again as nah to fight or kill peson dey hungry me


the man continue with him incantation till everybody enter the box finish,then we lineup again as the man use one plastic knife shuk our hand and collect our blood inside one small calabash,he mix am with one white thing before he begin do incantation


after the incantation he carry the small calabash and begin sock chicken feather inside the mixture as him use am to begin draw spider for our chest




wen him don finish with dat one he bring out six cross neckles wey be like catholic chaplet but this one different
he wear am for our neck one by one


hmm!! hahahaha!! done! it is done!!,the spider gang!,i don cook una,sanctify una and bind una together as one,united by the blood,........the devil yan as him begin tell us watin we must not do in other not to spoil our charm



latee-later he yan us say we go dey come renew our ritual every eight months


omo as nah to begin go house dey everybody we hail the man as we handkock our sign and dress up,we follow as we take come climb go up




we reach front of the small hurt house as we notice say nobody dey dia again,no dead body no moto,we sha enter our own mini bus begin go back home





as we burst out for the main road,we sight those people bus for front as e dey drive go back to load another passengers,Chai nah only gawd go save travellers





the journey back to festac nor tey! like wen we dey come as everybody just remain quiet,nobody talk pkikim till we reach house


everybody jump down begin enter house straight


we spend the whole dey getting high higher till we reach highest to the extent that we begin follow ceiling talk




as big mama yan,all the equipments arrive the next day as some paid professionals come begin teach us how to shoot gun,aim target and use all the equipment,if to say our government can supply those kind of guns and equipment wey big mama carry come give us to our officers believe me this our country for don get tight security tey! tey! there for be no mess up!



to be continued


sorry for the late update

click on the link to vote youngzubi for the literature award gawd bless!


https://www.nairaland.com/4652535/nomination-thread-august-5k-award

11 Likes 1 Share

Re: Sex Na Food (Pidgin Comedy Edition) Story Of A Rugged Guy By Youngzubi by Itscashkid: 11:50pm On Aug 07, 2018
cry
Omo spanaspana your leg don finally walka enter bad thing ohh
Re: Sex Na Food (Pidgin Comedy Edition) Story Of A Rugged Guy By Youngzubi by oscoxa214(m): 3:34am On Aug 08, 2018
U are a natural Bro, this pass nollywood standard self.. More wisdom to ur creative imagination Bro.. Really bursting my head.. 3rd time reading from d beginning..

1 Like

Re: Sex Na Food (Pidgin Comedy Edition) Story Of A Rugged Guy By Youngzubi by Holuwarsweun(m): 3:52am On Aug 08, 2018
Keep its up fam. Man is yr fans fam
Re: Sex Na Food (Pidgin Comedy Edition) Story Of A Rugged Guy By Youngzubi by stevodot22(m): 6:12am On Aug 08, 2018
Well-done bro for consistent update, as a matter of fact, I dash you Maya make you sample her small before sentino get to know.
Re: Sex Na Food (Pidgin Comedy Edition) Story Of A Rugged Guy By Youngzubi by senatordaniel(m): 6:37am On Aug 08, 2018
chia youngzubi u done kill me see his I forget the food I put for fire
Re: Sex Na Food (Pidgin Comedy Edition) Story Of A Rugged Guy By Youngzubi by Madiba147(m): 1:29pm On Aug 08, 2018
I don dey read many tori for nairaland..o boy dis one hold me wella oo...nna ehn I dey follow u bumper to fender..oya gberaaaa as ur number one fan no jus fit wait for the next update...madiba hail u ruggedly..peace out!!!

1 Like

Re: Sex Na Food (Pidgin Comedy Edition) Story Of A Rugged Guy By Youngzubi by Silver1996(m): 3:29pm On Aug 08, 2018
Zuby my guy, carry on.. Still following
Re: Sex Na Food (Pidgin Comedy Edition) Story Of A Rugged Guy By Youngzubi by Risingstar2020(f): 3:42pm On Aug 08, 2018
Youngzubi this your story sweet me o
Re: Sex Na Food (Pidgin Comedy Edition) Story Of A Rugged Guy By Youngzubi by coolaustyne(m): 3:48pm On Aug 08, 2018
Youngzubi:
coolaustyne brotherly wia u enter nah
officer with saucegrin

hope em! boko no! gawd forbid
Hi bro... good evening... work no gree man free since... I fit die... no shaking for my end. Thank God for his mercy...
Re: Sex Na Food (Pidgin Comedy Edition) Story Of A Rugged Guy By Youngzubi by izaray(f): 4:29pm On Aug 08, 2018
Well done boss!
Re: Sex Na Food (Pidgin Comedy Edition) Story Of A Rugged Guy By Youngzubi by Youngzubi(m): 5:13pm On Aug 08, 2018
Episode .............28





spider Gang(2)
-----------------------



one month later
*************



life just dey dey normal,tho we never carry out any mission at all,but as we dey now no kin mission whether na deadly abi lively wey we nor fit go,as our hearts don turn rock,no more human sympathy


since after we go do dat ritual thing,everything changed,nobi as money take dey follow enter my pocket wen ah just start that sugar mummy of a thing e take dey enter now wey we don take oath, never to betray,steal or disobey big mama


even all those numbers wey striker help me collect that day for that wedding ceremony i bin dey try dem since but all of dem just dey yan switched off,some not reachable

ok now wey i come make up my mind to focus and grab Florida offer,i call her for phone say i won see her make we discuss the matter again,she agree nahim she come yan me say make we meet for fabian classic hotel,as satan hate me reach big mama catch me for there,trust her nah,she begin para for me,onto say Florida don already know say i be big mama sugar boy she just calm down,dem send me comot as dem begin settle the matter woman to woman,nah later-later big mama come visit us the following day come yan say,nor more direct payment which mean say if we get connection to sex any rich lady nah she(big mama) go dey incharge of the price,she go receive the money for her own account then pay us the fixed price wey be 500,000 for each mission well accomplished


nah so the dance take change beat o!,our people dey always yan say, nobi mouth wey dem take come borrow money dem dey take come pay am"true talk"



we begin para for her,onto say na watin happen,say na who die!!,we resemble her zombie??,guys dey mad o!,make she nor just begin form dat kin level onto we dey work for her,nahim she come calm everybody down,then begin yan us say the money wey she dey spend ontop our feeding,drugs and equipment need to be recovered and she sef need to gain her own profit


nahim we come ask her Wat of the political connection wey our service to those high-high politicians go dey give to her family becos her husband nah politician too,so as we dey work for those top-top politicians dem go dey return the favor to big mama's husband political career onto say nah if left hand wash right hand right hand sef go wash left hand"nah so life be"



listen she yan,as time dey go una money go dey increase,this one nah just for a start she explain give us


i sidon for my bacony dey think deep,better breeze just dey cool my body as my mind dey ontop big mama matter till my phone begin ring,i turn look the screen wia e dey onto table nahim i see say nah my mama Chai e don tey o!,since wey i return lagos i neffa call her o! so i grab the phone pick am as i yan


"hello! mummy"



eh! n'na kedi ka eme(my son how are u doing)she yan in ibo


onto say i fall under category of "my papa say i be igbo" i kukuma begin yan her with correct pidgin before man pikin go bit tongue with igbo,i remember one Christmas time wey i travel go my village,i nor know watin carry me go begin learn our ogbotic dialect wey dey sound like Latin for my ear,just few words wey i try cram carry for head nahim my brain turn upside down,PIDGIN sef wey i sabi before begin confuse me,the language just format my brain nobi person tell me say make i kukuma backoff


hello mummy how body na.......i yan to my ma'le for phone


my pikin i dey fine oo!!,nah gawd just dey favor him daughter o!!.....she yan,but something dey wrong my mama just too happy,asin e don tey wen i hear her voice sound happy like this,normally nah so so chinedu go marry,go born my grandpikin

ha! mama this one u dey happy like this watin happen.....i yan as i open ear wide to hear the better gbedu


chinedu!!!........she halla me


ma!!.........i answer


gawd don finally bless us,our prayer eh!, gawd don answer am......she yan with better laugh


ehn!! oya samah me the full gist nah,make i know the size of Ghana must go wey i go buy to come carry my own share nah........i yan shining teeth




hmm!!! oya begin guess.....she yan



ohhhh!!! mama i dey always tell u dis thing,u don too old for all this kin thing nah,which one be make i begin guess again........ah shout for phone




ok!,never start vex becos watin go make u faint sef dey come,agnness get belle for u.......my mama samah the tin for my ear,e remain small make i faint true-true e just be like say nah Monday hammer my ma'le take hit me for head as headache begin worry me




Err!!! em! mama u say,u say watin ,abeg talk am again.......i yan as vex full my body



chinedu i said agnness ya wife to be,no ur wife becos as pikin take involve now nah ya wife,full one sef,she get belle and nah u get am....... she yan



mama nah gawd go pur**,i manage hold am back before i samah the insult finish,but as e take be now eh!,nah to squeeze my ma'le into weed light am and begin smoke am just dey hungry me

mama i nor know watin u dey talk atall!!,infact i nor know who be agnness,just kukuma go die since u don old,abeg die and leave my life alone mama........i shout for phone



chinedu i nor go die!!,gawd forbid bad thing,see i go live too see my grand pikin kolokolo,my own nor different,since ya useless big for nothing fool brother waste him life,him just disappear like ghost,the day wey him call me for phone say him want dey do body guard abi security job for one big man i vex abuse am for phone since dat year till now i never see or even hear anything from him again,next thing wey i begin hear be say cult people dey pursue am till dem kill him,dem waste my pikin,now nah u be my only hope but see as u decide to live ya life,e nor different from ya brother own,chinedu watin i do una,nah bad thing i do born una?............my ma'le yan full my ear



see mama i will never accept dat bastered or agnness make she just go abort am......i shout



gawd forbid,chinedu i abort u?? if to say i abort u wen u dey my belle u for no dey alive today?!,chinedu watin bad bad o!!,leave all this ya rubbish life.......she yan as my vex come double nahim i scream

mama!! get ouuutt!!!!! just go an dieeee!!! dat pikin nobi me get am,leave my life alone mama leeeaaavvvvee meeee alone!!!!!......towwaaaa!!!!! i smash my phone for electric pole wey stand for our street gawd forbid i yan as i vex enter house,i waka go carry hot dry gin as i light igboo begin smoke and drink, i just dey waka from one side to another


all this one nor just do at all so i run go up stair enter my room,lock door as i open my drawer carry one small box out then open am as i spread the cocaine wey dey inside ontop table


i bend my nose as i draw am enter my nose aahhhhhh!!!!!! che! che! che!!,my room begin dance for my head


i sniff another long draw, omo i forget everything kpata-kpata nah just as my house take dey rotate like standing fan i dey see,hmmmm i comot breath as i stand up stagger den use back land ontop my bed gowwm!!!!!


to be continued

*********

click on the link to vote me "youngzubi "for the literature award thank u, gawd bless!

https://www.nairaland.com/4652535/nomination-thread-august-5k-award


swiz123 i use this medium to thank u for the mistakes which u pointed out,i worked on this update with reference to those mistakes u pointed out,as a writer i totally understood ur point thank u once again for the love,please do read the update and give me a feedback also point out any other area u felt i should work on thank u




to all my die hard fans, those who always appear where ever youngzubi is mentioned thank u very much guys,to those who read and find it hard to encourage me with their comments thank u,to those lovely ones who took out time to vote for me nah only gawd go fit reward una i also say a very big thank u!!!

jah bless!!!!!!!!

10 Likes

Re: Sex Na Food (Pidgin Comedy Edition) Story Of A Rugged Guy By Youngzubi by Youngzubi(m): 5:17pm On Aug 08, 2018
oscoxa214:
U are a natural Bro, this pass nollywood standard self.. More wisdom to ur creative imagination Bro.. Really bursting my head.. 3rd time reading from d beginning..

thank u my man

also show some love and vote for me

gawd bless!
Re: Sex Na Food (Pidgin Comedy Edition) Story Of A Rugged Guy By Youngzubi by Youngzubi(m): 5:20pm On Aug 08, 2018
senatordaniel:
chia youngzubi u done kill me see his I forget the food I put for fire

ahhh!! u must be a good senator to be cooking ur foodgrin
Re: Sex Na Food (Pidgin Comedy Edition) Story Of A Rugged Guy By Youngzubi by Youngzubi(m): 5:22pm On Aug 08, 2018
stevodot22:
Well-done bro for consistent update, as a matter of fact, I dash you Maya make you sample her small before sentino get to know.


nna u want make sentino gimme ota-piapia

1 Like

Re: Sex Na Food (Pidgin Comedy Edition) Story Of A Rugged Guy By Youngzubi by Youngzubi(m): 5:23pm On Aug 08, 2018
Madiba147:
I don dey read many tori for nairaland..o boy dis one hold me wella oo...nna ehn I dey follow u bumper to fender..oya gberaaaa as ur number one fan no jus fit wait for the next update...madiba hail u ruggedly..peace out!!!


tem!!! tem!!!! for u my man

1 Like 1 Share

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