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Should I Continue Giving Money To My Friend's Wife? - Family (2) - Nairaland

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Re: Should I Continue Giving Money To My Friend's Wife? by Nobody: 7:30pm On Dec 07, 2018
alimaa:
I have a very close friend who has been like a brother to me right from our days in the university, we also worship in the same church, he was my best man when I wedded a few years ago. He got married this year and after the wedding things were not rosy for them the following month and I gave my little assistance as a friend. Around July this year his sister had a life threatening ailment and when he reached out to me I quickly responded with something meaningful. After some weeks his wife told me she was sick when we met in church, I quickly went to an ATM, made withdrawal and gave her money to buy drugs since her husband who happens to be my friend was not in town.

The irony of the whole thing now is
that my friend's wife now thinks that I am Father Christmas and now calls and sends texts requesting for money to take care of her antenatal drugs but I have refused to help because I believe it is wrong and she keeps pestering me.

Please what is your advice?

How can I become ur friend too..it's like I are generous...??




U see the truth is...at one time or another, we will play maga....d most important thing is to be a maga for a good cause..

1 Like

Re: Should I Continue Giving Money To My Friend's Wife? by notoriousbabe: 7:32pm On Dec 07, 2018
If you have, help her, if you dont, let her know. Christianity is not just about being born again
Re: Should I Continue Giving Money To My Friend's Wife? by Nobody: 7:33pm On Dec 07, 2018
HarunaWest:

Pls help her...since it's antenatal...Just do it,Am Sure God Has bigger plans for you...Health is very important for an individual.

What is there in antenatal?
When she gives birth nko? She will continue, baby feeding nko?

AbegI


Stop giving it's already a strain to you and its no longer cheerful
Tell her husband.

5 Likes 1 Share

Re: Should I Continue Giving Money To My Friend's Wife? by Nobody: 7:33pm On Dec 07, 2018
Just let her husband to be in the knowing... If you can still assist.. But don't give the husband
Re: Should I Continue Giving Money To My Friend's Wife? by Nobody: 7:33pm On Dec 07, 2018
It's good to render help but helping a married woman especially the one you know her husband well most likely may get back badly at you.

Find a way to involve her husband but don't report the wife to him.

2 Likes

Re: Should I Continue Giving Money To My Friend's Wife? by bucho8888: 7:35pm On Dec 07, 2018
alimaa:
I have a very close friend who has been like a brother to me right from our days in the university, we also worship in the same church, he was my best man when I wedded a few years ago. He got married this year and after the wedding things were not rosy for them the following month and I gave my little assistance as a friend. Around July this year his sister had a life threatening ailment and when he reached out to me I quickly responded with something meaningful. After some weeks his wife told me she was sick when we met in church, I quickly went to an ATM, made withdrawal and gave her money to buy drugs since her husband who happens to be my friend was not in town.

The irony of the whole thing now is
that my friend's wife now thinks that I am Father Christmas and now calls and sends texts requesting for money to take care of her antenatal drugs but I have refused to help because I believe it is wrong and she keeps pestering me.

Please what is your advice?

BROS FLEE OOO, AM TELLING U DIS COS SAME HAPPENED 2 ME. IF SATAN WANT CAUSE WAHALA U WOUNLDNT C IT COMING. PREFERABLY, CONTACT D HUSBAND B4 SENDING ANYTHING 2 HER. OR ELSE D NEXT STORY WILL DEFINIETLY TOUCH D HEART

4 Likes

Re: Should I Continue Giving Money To My Friend's Wife? by udemzyudex(m): 7:35pm On Dec 07, 2018
Well, I believe in discussion, all you have to do is tell her you can't continue to give her money even if you want to, it will be through her husband.


That's all.

2 Likes

Re: Should I Continue Giving Money To My Friend's Wife? by Innobee99(m): 7:35pm On Dec 07, 2018
vingeophysicist:
Always assist with the consent of your friend. Don't be surprised that her husband provides her with those things she equally asked from you.
U're right bro. Women can be dangerously funny sometimes
Re: Should I Continue Giving Money To My Friend's Wife? by Oyindidi(f): 7:36pm On Dec 07, 2018
alimaa:
I have a very close friend who has been like a brother to me right from our days in the university, we also worship in the same church, he was my best man when I wedded a few years ago. He got married this year and after the wedding things were not rosy for them the following month and I gave my little assistance as a friend. Around July this year his sister had a life threatening ailment and when he reached out to me I quickly responded with something meaningful. After some weeks his wife told me she was sick when we met in church, I quickly went to an ATM, made withdrawal and gave her money to buy drugs since her husband who happens to be my friend was not in town.

The irony of the whole thing now is
that my friend's wife now thinks that I am Father Christmas and now calls and sends texts requesting for money to take care of her antenatal drugs but I have refused to help because I believe it is wrong and she keeps pestering me.

Please what is your advice?
Call me a proud person the bolded is the reason I don't ask people for help. The woman may send you another message begging for your help later but see what you're saying behind her back. I don't think if the husband is doing well she'll come to you for help.

Mr rich man, if she ask anything from you again tell her you can't help her. She won't kill you

5 Likes 1 Share

Re: Should I Continue Giving Money To My Friend's Wife? by QuickStandard: 7:36pm On Dec 07, 2018
tongue

Hmmmm, like you said the hubby is your best friend.

Personally I don't see anything wrong with helping your friend in times of need.

But giving his wife money behind him (your friend) is very bad.

I will use myself an an example.

I had a childhood friend, that we are like brothers, we even lived together at some point as bachelor's, after my nysc I had a job, but he was still searching, and I use to assist him in my little capacity.


When I left my job to start up Quick Standard Solutions, I already had a pregnant wife, and trust me when I say things were as horrible as the word horrible itself.

Thank God he (my friend) got a Job, it got to a point that he was helping me out financially, without the know of my wife.

I remember the first Christmas dress that my daughter wore, he was the one that bought it with his money, without my wife knowing about it.

What are my saying?

If your friend has financial challenges, you ain't doing him any good by giving his wife money, instead what you should have done is give your friend the money or help you intend giving the wife, in doing so you are covering for your friend and the same time helping his ego.

How do you think your friend will feel when he finds out you have been giving his wife money in his behind?

It's not a good thing to do.

Besides, saying you are not father Christmas is very out of place.

Nobody knows tomorrow, your friend might just turn out to be your Savior tomorrow.

My 2cents anyways.

Thanks as you have a rethink.

17 Likes 2 Shares

Re: Should I Continue Giving Money To My Friend's Wife? by notoriousbabe: 7:36pm On Dec 07, 2018
If you have, help her, if you dont, let her know. Christianity is not just about being born again, it's also about sacrifice
Re: Should I Continue Giving Money To My Friend's Wife? by jibrilELsudan: 7:38pm On Dec 07, 2018
You should keep giving her money. She will come and fvck you anytime you want to Bleep her. Its better to even start fucking her now that she is pregnant cause Na now e go dey hungry am to fvck.

Re: Should I Continue Giving Money To My Friend's Wife? by supereagle(m): 7:41pm On Dec 07, 2018
Shibaraba:

If you ask me... Na who I go ask?
Your Bible says whatever the right does the left shouldn't know about it. You just told the world. Blessing forfeited.
You think you're helping her? You're helping yourself.
No imagine she's reading this because you described her perfectly. Ask yourself...

You are mis applying scriptures.

1 Like

Re: Should I Continue Giving Money To My Friend's Wife? by DBestDoc(f): 7:41pm On Dec 07, 2018
alimaa:
The matter tire me, I have a family to cater for.


Get ready for hospital bills, pampers, baby food, immunization and make sure you keep some cash aside for emergencies.

Things aren't smooth for them yet and they're already expecting in less than 4 months of marriage. No proper planning and the next thing is to rope God into their foolishness.

@OP only start what you can finish.

3 Likes

Re: Should I Continue Giving Money To My Friend's Wife? by Teejay6laq(m): 7:41pm On Dec 07, 2018
Yes keep on giving!!!Oponu...

1 Like

Re: Should I Continue Giving Money To My Friend's Wife? by Bostonfarms: 7:43pm On Dec 07, 2018
Are you sure the husband is not aware,your friend might be feeling somehow to ask you so he sent the wife. Mind you there are just 1year in marriage so things might be very difficult for them,try to reach your friend but I guess if he will open up

1 Like

Re: Should I Continue Giving Money To My Friend's Wife? by DCNeche: 7:43pm On Dec 07, 2018
darkcaesar03360:
give if you have and if you don't politely turn it down...... must every situation demands online attention?
I wonder??
Re: Should I Continue Giving Money To My Friend's Wife? by SeniorZato(m): 7:44pm On Dec 07, 2018
Congratulations my man

God is using you to answer someone's prayer but purify your heart and let no strings attached

2 Likes

Re: Should I Continue Giving Money To My Friend's Wife? by CDCEO001: 7:44pm On Dec 07, 2018
I love that you did not mention the amount of money you help them with.
But you need to call the husband and let him know each time you want to help them.
Is not a must to always help them, help them only whenever you can but with your friend's consent.

1 Like

Re: Should I Continue Giving Money To My Friend's Wife? by dannyoungstick(m): 7:44pm On Dec 07, 2018
darkcaesar03360:
give if you have and if you don't politely turn it down...... must every situation demands online attention?
That was a rude reply....do not judge...Maybe this is the first situation he is bringing online, you just concluded just like that.. He brought the problem for help, and if you can't offer stay silent instead of joining the crowd.

2 Likes

Re: Should I Continue Giving Money To My Friend's Wife? by agarawu23(m): 7:45pm On Dec 07, 2018
He got married this year and after the wedding things were not rosy for them the following month

When will people stop wasting money foolishly on wedding to Impress, satisfy people and start begging for money to feed a month after ? angryThe few thousand they wasted in lavish wedding will start up a business for the couple.

Keep giving them bro "if" u have and always inform the husband.

5 Likes

Re: Should I Continue Giving Money To My Friend's Wife? by CDCEO001: 7:46pm On Dec 07, 2018
I love that you did not mention the amount of money you help them with.
But you need to call the husband and let him know each time you want to help them.
Is not a must to always help them, help them only whenever you can but with your friend's consent.
Re: Should I Continue Giving Money To My Friend's Wife? by PennywysCares(m): 7:47pm On Dec 07, 2018
alimaa:
I have a very close friend who has been like a brother to me right from our days in the university, we also worship in the same church, he was my best man when I wedded a few years ago. He got married this year and after the wedding things were not rosy for them the following month and I gave my little assistance as a friend. Around July this year his sister had a life threatening ailment and when he reached out to me I quickly responded with something meaningful. After some weeks his wife told me she was sick when we met in church, I quickly went to an ATM, made withdrawal and gave her money to buy drugs since her husband who happens to be my friend was not in town.

The irony of the whole thing now is
that my friend's wife now thinks that I am Father Christmas and now calls and sends texts requesting for money to take care of her antenatal drugs but I have refused to help because I believe it is wrong and she keeps pestering me.

Please what is your advice?
brother keep giving as much as you have to give, its a blessing to your soul
don't stop doing what is good, keep the good work on except when you don't have
Re: Should I Continue Giving Money To My Friend's Wife? by Nobody: 7:49pm On Dec 07, 2018
let your friend be aware before u give her o

2 Likes

Re: Should I Continue Giving Money To My Friend's Wife? by desgiezd(m): 7:50pm On Dec 07, 2018
JONNYSPUTE:
My brother for the sake of God,don't withdraw your helping hands from them. As long as you have,keep helping them but make sure you do so through your friend .

Perfect. Nothing to add!

1 Like

Re: Should I Continue Giving Money To My Friend's Wife? by dancewith: 7:50pm On Dec 07, 2018
I don't think it's right that she gets money from you without informing her husband

That's akin to adultery. If he knows and doesn't think he should thank you for it, then you may review the gesture

Its more likey he isn't aware which makes the entire act risky and morally suspect. The bible says to flee from all appearances of evil. It doesn't have to be evil as long as it looks like ones you should flee

5 Likes

Re: Should I Continue Giving Money To My Friend's Wife? by Daeylar(f): 7:52pm On Dec 07, 2018
alimaa:
.

The irony of the whole thing now is
that my friend's wife now thinks that I am Father Christmas and now calls and sends texts requesting for money to take care of her antenatal drugs but I have refused to help because I believe it is wrong and she keeps pestering me.

Please what is your advice?


Tell her husband everything. Don't give until you do. And if her husband supports her. Don't give if you don't feel like doing so or if you don't have.

DBestDoc:


Things aren't smooth for them yet and they're already expecting in less than 4 months of marriage. No proper planning and the next thing is to rope God into their foolishness .



I don't really understand some married couples. They don't even have money to take care of themselves well. Next thing is get pregnant.

I wonder the timeline between when they started having financial struggles and when she conceived, Op says they've had financial trouble since the first month of the marriage. So did they make a baby knowing fully well that they are experiencing financial struggles?

It's so unfair to the poor baby.

4 Likes

Re: Should I Continue Giving Money To My Friend's Wife? by Chuksmonika(m): 7:52pm On Dec 07, 2018
That is one thing with people,when you help them financially for sometime,they will think you dont have needs to attend to,or you mint money,they will take their whole problem and put on your head,if not,Tell me why a reasonable woman,will leave the man who got her pregnant(her husband),and start asking you money for antenatal,my brother,you have to be careful oo,..you have to keep your distance from your friend wife,remove chimpanze hand from the pot of soup,before it turns to human hand,a word is enough for the wise,you can still be helping that your friend,when you can.

5 Likes

Re: Should I Continue Giving Money To My Friend's Wife? by aku626(m): 7:53pm On Dec 07, 2018
Be happy you’re in the position to help than the other way around. I’d advise you always send assistance through your friend and not his wife very important and if this isn’t possible let him know before you extend a helping hand to his wife. This will save your relationship with your friend and their marriage trust me.

1 Like 1 Share

Re: Should I Continue Giving Money To My Friend's Wife? by davidodiba(m): 7:53pm On Dec 07, 2018
Give cheerfully and thank God for that p riviledge.
Don't ever think she is disturbing you
Maybe each time you need to give, give to the husband instead to give her so he won't be angry when he discovers

Thanks for helping ...your types are few especially here on Nairaland... grin


Hihihihi...

****escapes
Re: Should I Continue Giving Money To My Friend's Wife? by Kenturkey048(m): 7:54pm On Dec 07, 2018
jibrilELsudan:
You should keep giving her money. She will come and fvck you anytime you want to Bleep her. Its better to even start fucking her now that she is pregnant cause Na now e go dey hungry am to fvck.
Na wen Buhari go use him head make comments for Christ sake.
Re: Should I Continue Giving Money To My Friend's Wife? by ogbonti: 7:56pm On Dec 07, 2018
Shibaraba:

If you ask me... Na who I go ask?
Your Bible says whatever the right does the left shouldn't know about it. You just told the world. Blessing forfeited.
You think you're helping her? You're helping yourself.
No imagine she's reading this because you described her perfectly. Ask yourself...



Shorrop there, this good samaritan did not ask this question because he wants you to know he is a good man, that is why he didn't say the amount in all instances where he gave, I guess he is trying to ensure he is not sending a wrong signal by giving the woman assistance alwaya and also, to know if it is right for the woman to take advantage of his generosity. Giving when needed brings blessing, giving foolishly like giving money to a drug addict or someone playing pranks on u won't yield any blessing because my Bible tell's me we should be as wise as a serpent but gentle as a dove! WA RN YOURSELF OOOO, however, receive sense!!!! grin....

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