₦airaland Forum

okokkk:


You will soon find out that the daughter you're training is not even yours.

penguinpikin:
.

He dated someone for 9 years... i dont expect her to marry that kind of man either. 9years lohun lohun.

pocohantas:
I don't know why I have a feeling you are one very humble guy, the type who isn't very adventurous, missionary style kinda guy...

Don't even force her. Difficult to do, but that is the best thing for your long term sanity. If not, she will keep making it obvious by her words that she never wanted you.

Recently a NLder was here to report himself after telling his wife she wasn't his first choice. That might be you in few years time, only that you will be at the receiving end.

You see all these girls that their eyes are up? Once they start wearing some kind clothe and experiencing city-girls life, marriage no dey their mind o. Let alone marriage to some homely dude. She will convince herself there is still time and there is better out there.

She might only remember you (or your type) when she is retiring. Pele

MMotimo:
You didn’t say how old she is. You’ve been dating for 6 years with a child before marriage. Maybe she’s feeling like you stole her youth before she could really discover herself. Maybe she’s now old enough to realize that you’re not her specs.

Ultimately, it sounds like she’s simply not into you anymore. . . . assuming she ever was. If she wants to end the relationship, don’t force her to change her mind because that’s only delaying the inevitable. If you did something wrong to cause the change (your past mistakes maybe?) then you’ll have to convince her that you’re truly remorseful and maybe she’ll give you another chance. Life’s too short for “manage-manage” relationships. All the best.

GoldPencil:
lol. bros I tire. he don even give am belle then still de bother. Once you have birthed my progeny into this world, it's not me who will tell you to act right. Na you go de cry because i will now be revealing my world championship belt in scumbaggery. The Golden rule. do unto me as you would like me to do unto you, forever stands.

OP. send upkeep money for your daughter then pay the school fees yourself. Use the remaining and find even younger slay queens on demand. you dont even need to keep them permanent. you are going to see some funny magic after this. Last last nobody has monopoly of nonsense behaviour

pocohantas:
The earlier you guys understand that not so many undergraduate girls are very pro-marriage, the better for you. Once you spot that one who is very much interested in the fast life, pull the plug immediately.

Her parents told you both to come to the VILLAGE? You think if her parents had enough to be giving her, she would bother herself with you?

It is painful my dear, but your wife is in her hoe-phase. Some skip that phase, some spend few years in it, some stay a decade there- even do spillover.

You need to have some self-respect. A grown ass man following two fcking undergraduates to hear their conversation?

You guys don't hear word. You remind me of my colleague and that tin-tomatoes-headed girl he was pursuing. One small 200l girl. The way the girl did his heart ehn, she passed it through shredder.

Go find one afternoon newspaper that has her life figured out. Someone that will bring in tangible and intangible resources to the relationship. That way when she wants to throw it all away, she would think of how it would hit her own balance sheet.

monerozi5590:
God bless Ubunja and Hardon... Lol... You are a girl and you just confirm some of the things they have been saying....I like this.


But but, they warned us not to take relationship advice from a woman and i agree with them.

healthserve:
People loyal to me who saw the events unfold came around with the information. Three different contacts.


She's not just aware, even the sisters and mum cause one way or the other, within the same city,they run into me discussing with people who matter ( in business settings ), and how they saw people honoured me, both elderly and very established people.

akinade28:
Op, if I got your story right, your wife's dressing and attitude changed due to the influence of her friends and you often report her to her parents. And the last incident really got her angry to the extent of her keeping mute and she said shes no longer interested in the marriage.And a guy came to visit her
There are two things involved:
1) she might not really mean she's no longer interested in the marriage but she is acting that way because she is still very angry at you and is doing yanga because of your costant involvement of her parents in her case and wants you to come back to your sense.
Women are very emotional, sometimes their no means yes.
You guys should be able to settle matter amicably without involving parents and family members. If both of cant do this then i guess you arent ready for marriage.
2) she's truly no longer interested in you and really wants to explore or try out something new. 6 years is a long time. She has seen all of you both your strength and weakness. Already has a child for you. She might be distracted by another guy.
There's is only way to find out, show her unusual love, care and attention just for few weeks. Show her that you still want her and wants the marriage to work out and be sober for your actions. A normal sensible woman will come to her senses and reconcile seeing your commitment.
But prepare for the worst, have a backup plan, if she doesn't reconcile just forget about her and start planing on how to take care of your daughter

MYDEBBY:
Dear Nairalanders, I greet you all.

Pls I need candid advice, I have dated my wife for over six years without an issue and now that we have done traditional rites and about to climax with white wedding she is giving flimsy excuses that she is no longer interested in me.

She is currently in final year and has drastically changed in her dressing and attitude towards due to influence of friends in school.

Often I do report incidences of her recent poor dressing to her parents after cautioning her she will channel the grievances to me.

The recent one made her so angry that she started recanting all my past mistakes which she and her family are aware of and have resolved since now using it as an excuse against me that she is no longer interested.

She kept mute for over two weeks due to anger yet I still transferred money twice to her but up till now she did not acknowledged it, only for her to send text that she need money for our daughters school fees. I then decide to visit them off campus where they stay yesterday with lots of provision yet she could not say a common thank you.

While I was still making peace with her asking her to forgive me for whatever wrong I have done to her by reporting her to her PARENTS, promising not to do so again, a guy knocked the door and she went out after the guy I asked a relation who was there who was the guy and he said he is my wife's friend, I quickly followed them on citing me the guy diverted after their discussion about me.

When we then entered the house I asked her who was the guy and she said that's not my business. I kept quiet.

After a while I called her parents to tell them the situation of things that their daughter said she is no longer interested they now asked us to come down to the village to see them this coming weekend.

I know things are not alright somewhere and as such I need straight forward advice on what to do.

Pls no insult just help out.

Thanks

PrimadonnaO:
How can you say it's not a bad idea that he wants to take a child from its mother...and not to raise this child himself, but a granny?

perryy:
That is just the point dear. I've been there and I quite understand what u mean. If the man is wise, let him run now that he can still send money because if he force himself on that woman maybe through bribing her parents and all that , he would live to regret his actions. Best solution, run now that u still have the means. Mine was like that and I was trying to do a true lover , if not for God, by noe feeding would have been a big problem for me. The woman also has a daughter with me. Once a woman hates u, she has hated u. Nothing u would do to please her again . and before a woman hates her man , she MUST have someone outside she sees as a better option and she would only realize late after she has left u.

OutfitSystems:
Have you tried talking to her personally rather than reporting her to her parent at all times? not everyone can do with the third party thing

I advise the two of you sit to talk and that's going to be real... unlike the family gather where others decision can be imposed.
Get a blog and be posting there then you can share the link on nairaland. In case you are interested in having your blog where you can be posting your educative contents. Kindly check my signature and contact me



BTW I need help with putting up educating content about healthy and staying fit on Nairaland but each time I put up a post fully researched and written, Nairaland Mods find it in the greatest HIGH PEDESTALS to ban the content without even giving any reason why?

Please, you can help by contributing on what I need to do right so I can put up content that will benefit a lot of people. Thank you as you do so.
https://www.nairaland.com/5407094/why-does-posts-get-banned

OutfitSystems:
Have you tried talking to her personally rather than reporting her to her parent at all times? not everyone can do with the third party thing

I advise the two of you sit to talk and that's going to be real... unlike the family gather where others decision can be imposed.



BTW I need help with putting up educating content about healthy and staying fit on Nairaland but each time I put up a post fully researched and written, Nairaland Mods find it in the greatest HIGH PEDESTALS to ban the content without even giving any reason why?

Please, you can help by contributing on what I need to do right so I can put up content that will benefit a lot of people. Thank you as you do so.
https://www.nairaland.com/5407094/why-does-posts-get-banned

Emaprince:
Pro-feminist in Nairaand bro

In real life, these women are cold and do the exact opposite of what they depict themselves as here. There is always a man spinning and controlling them.

olabrinks:
She is not interested in the marriage, and if you marry her by force you will be entering a life time of misery and a constant battle to prove yourself to her. Better get out now before it’s too late. It’s that simple.

I don’t know why men are always fighting for women that don’t want them. They’re millions of single available women go and look for them and leave this small girl alone.

Yeecar:
You dogded a bullet.

pocohantas:
The word CONTROL makes me cringe and I would never understand the Nigerian man's obsession with controlling a full grown human, even to the extent of deluding himself into thinking there is ALWAYS a man controlling a woman.

There is no man born of a vagina that can CONTROL me. The highest I can give you is love and respect. If you want to control, go buy a dog. Or get a small girl like this OP did, while hoping she doesn't open eye.

Reminds me of this dude I met that was obsessed with throwing his ego everywhere. I don't know why he thought he had a job to bend me, but I am sure he learned the hard way.

healthserve:
Bullet ke.


I dodged a Nuke.

healthserve:
Slay queens on demand. Smh. Terminology

Yeecar:

PrimadonnaO:
Stop allowing strangers' assumption decide the course of your relationship!

Jombom:
God is my witness one sense you no get I swear.

[s][/s] No let that girl give you foolish advice na dem birds of same feather flocking together. They enjoy doing foolish things in relationships, leaving you on the fringes to keep guessing if they are cheating n all. When you complain about the foolishness of their behaviour they tell you that complain is the reason why they must break up.

I sincerely wish every guy is like me. I no de date who pass me, once my love is not reciprocated abeg me self no go love you, child or no child. There are too many good hearted women abound to be fooling with semi or undercover olosho.

GoldPencil:
lol. bros abi you no know say u fit order person wcw/slay queen direct from your phone now? if ur bar is complete it's only an app away. may be meaningless, but you will still spend that money in a useless way so...