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My wife is frustrating my life I don't just know what to do.. I feel like killing myself just to end this marriage, staying with her is like living with Satan...

Everyday trouble for 10yrs now..I am tired...she has refused to work or do anything, she doesn't respect or regard me, she goes out and comes back at will without telling me where and why

She is always insulting me while looking for a fight with either bottle, hammer or the kitchen knife of which I have endured all these years because of our children, her pastor told me 8yrs ago that she will change but she is becoming more aggressive which has prompted me to cry out.

What should I do? I need urgent advice

Thielngr:
My wife is frustrating my life I don't just know what to do.. I feel like killing myself just to end this marriage, staying with her is like living with Satan...everyday trouble for 10yrs now..I am tired...she has refused to work or do anything, she doesn't respect or regard me, she goes out and comes back at will without telling me where and why, she is always insulting me while looking for a fight with either bottle, hammer or the kitchen knife of which I have endured all these years because of our children, her pastor told me 8yrs ago that she will change but she is becoming more aggressive which has prompted me to cry out.,.what should I do...I need urgent advice

inside life

Instead of crying out online how about going to her family, tell them what you've just written, ask for a separation and if you see no change then you know what's best for you.

Really Remember the children you're staying in the marriage for are also human as you are, it won't be fair to them if those children become orphans due to your "love" for them. File a divorce already, make dem no come carry your dead body Comot for the house one day...

.seem she see U as a wek man.U dnt need to KILL urself cos of one useless demon u kal wife.A wife dat waka up/down,cun home anytime she like is NOT a wife. U dey sidon on time bomb.Leave her now b4 God leave U.Beta still,the pastor dat see her change can accommodate her. NO TIME, Act FAST.

People like her don't change, I wonder what made you decide to make her your wife in the first place, it's not like you wouldn't see the sign of who she might turn out to be as a wife, the essence of marriage is not even primarily about having children, it's about being with someone you both love each other, which should make you happy, the moment your marriage is becoming a threat to your life, quit it, marriage is not agidi if it's going to take away your life, just find a way to take care of your children, koju bayen lo.

What abut walking out if the marriage?

Hammer, knife and bottles? Pls call for a separation. I believe the period of separation will be enough for her to clear her head. If she changes better, if not run for your life. The above are deadly weapons and your life is at risk.

But oga what is the cause of are aggressiveness and what do you guys argue about.

You said she is a violent person, didn't you see the signs and trait before engaging her in marriage.



If. you've tried your possible best and it still didn't work out, you guys should go your separate ways, marriage is not do or die.

blesskewe:
What abut walking out if the marriage?

There's an adage that says "he who's only tool is a hammer sees all problem as a NAIL" admittedly he seems to be in an unfortunate pool yet, rather than separating let him try other options by putting himself in her shoe at least to understand her, see things from her own perspective, feel how she think etc, perhaps he will get better scope to tream her to his soul. The fact is that there are people that have passed more than he's encountering and still overcome. @op, you will overcome. Assume that all women are them same and that you got not option [b]b [/b]you will find a way to make it work. Remember time and patience work wonders, watch and see.

It's aggressive love, when she carry weapon you to should carry weapon, you will then go outside and be raking (aggressively shouting but don't attack, just b forming anger). Later you will see she what she tell you & give later.
You no talk say she bust your head or stab you before

Even buhari is making life difficult but thank God his own has expiry date



should we advise you to divorce her?

Thielngr:
My wife is frustrating my life I don't just know what to do.. I feel like killing myself just to end this marriage, staying with her is like living with Satan...everyday trouble for 10yrs now..I am tired...she has refused to work or do anything, she doesn't respect or regard me, she goes out and comes back at will without telling me where and why, she is always insulting me while looking for a fight with either bottle, hammer or the kitchen knife of which I have endured all these years because of our children, her pastor told me 8yrs ago that she will change but she is becoming more aggressive which has prompted me to cry out.,.what should I do...I need urgent advice
[quote author=risos post=83467968]It's aggressive love, when she carry weapon you to should carry weapon, you will then go outside and be raking (aggressively shouting but don't attack, just b forming anger). Later you will see she what she tell you & give later.
You no talk say she bust your head or stab you before

I would have advise to go to God in prayers, but most times we don't wait for God to give us our spouse, we think we can do it all by ourselves, but all hope is not lost, if you can call him he knows how to convert even the most hardened heart

Oga your wife is mentally ill, forget pastor matter. There are two things involve, if you still love her, help her seek for help in a hospital. Second be a man for God's sake, don't you have balls between your legs? Set the rules in your house and stand by it, if she breaks any of them, bundle her back to her parents. How can you allow that for this long? A man should represent authority and strength not weakness. Those attitude she is displaying is affecting your children unconsciously, they don't need to grow up in this kind of environment so protect them. Imagine a child thinking is OK to verbally abuse or chase people with knife. Work on your home man

This looks like a made-up story to me. It goes without saying that I have typed some insults before, but I had to consider the feeling of the person that is at the other end of the phone.


How can you allow stupidity to linger for 8 years in your home?

Divorce her ASAP!

Thielngr:
My wife is frustrating my life I don't just know what to do.. I feel like killing myself just to end this marriage, staying with her is like living with Satan...everyday trouble for 10yrs now..I am tired...she has refused to work or do anything, she doesn't respect or regard me, she goes out and comes back at will without telling me where and why, she is always insulting me while looking for a fight with either bottle, hammer or the kitchen knife of which I have endured all these years because of our children, her pastor told me 8yrs ago that she will change but she is becoming more aggressive which has prompted me to cry out.,.what should I do...I need urgent advice

Violent marriage .....smh

Agbero marriage

Thielngr:
My wife is frustrating my life I don't just know what to do.. I feel like killing myself just to end this marriage, staying with her is like living with Satan...everyday trouble for 10yrs now..I am tired...she has refused to work or do anything, she doesn't respect or regard me, she goes out and comes back at will without telling me where and why, she is always insulting me while looking for a fight with either bottle, hammer or the kitchen knife of which I have endured all these years because of our children, her pastor told me 8yrs ago that she will change but she is becoming more aggressive which has prompted me to cry out.,.what should I do...I need urgent advice

Where did you meet her? Was it the pastor that begged you to marry her?

Was she working when you married her?

Did she suddenly change, which I doubt. In essence what signs did she exhibit during courtship that could have developed into this?

Thielngr:
My wife is frustrating my life I don't just know what to do.. I feel like killing myself just to end this marriage, staying with her is like living with Satan...everyday trouble for 10yrs now..I am tired...she has refused to work or do anything, she doesn't respect or regard me, she goes out and comes back at will without telling me where and why, she is always insulting me while looking for a fight with either bottle, hammer or the kitchen knife of which I have endured all these years because of our children, her pastor told me 8yrs ago that she will change but she is becoming more aggressive which has prompted me to cry out.,.what should I do...I need urgent advice

the men we give birth to nowadays are Half men.

only two options, and both are very extreme,

i: You either file for a divorce and save your life
or
ii: beat her up so badly in an humiliating humanly degrading manner that can instill lifetime fear in her heart, the kind of beating that would scare her, that any time she sees you her stress level is triggered and she goes into panic mode.. then make love to her afterwards just to mess her up pschologically

Your Marriage is going through power tussle phase, and your wife is already using violence to gain full authority.. however things can change for you in few months or even days....

When the military,police or nysc recruits a stuborn person, they break them with routine punishments and strict iron fist aproach.. no matter how stuborn or difficult a recruit is, the training instills fear of the authority in such recruits.. your wife needs iron fist mind set reprograming through use of apporpraite force and a little bit of loving

Thielngr:
My wife is frustrating my life I don't just know what to do.. I feel like killing myself just to end this marriage, staying with her is like living with Satan...everyday trouble for 10yrs now..I am tired...she has refused to work or do anything, she doesn't respect or regard me, she goes out and comes back at will without telling me where and why, she is always insulting me while looking for a fight with either bottle, hammer or the kitchen knife of which I have endured all these years because of our children, her pastor told me 8yrs ago that she will change but she is becoming more aggressive which has prompted me to cry out.,.what should I do...I need urgent advice

Hmmmm


I heard women don't change on their own, that sometimes after marriage, some evil spirit do possess some women....maybe their spirit husband that was enjoying them alone when they were single who got jealous that they finally got married, so it gets them enchanted spiritually to do abnormal things, sometimes that spirit may push them to kill their husband.....though psychologists can call it mental illness

RedCreme21 Pettyprincess i need to see both ur opinions here

risos:
It's aggressive love, when she carry weapon you to should carry weapon, you will then go outside and be raking (aggressively shouting but don't attack, just b forming anger). Later you will see she what she tell you & give later.
You no talk say she bust your head or stab you before

worst

Thielngr:
My wife is frustrating my life I don't just know what to do.. I feel like killing myself just to end this marriage, staying with her is like living with Satan...everyday trouble for 10yrs now..I am tired...she has refused to work or do anything, she doesn't respect or regard me, she goes out and comes back at will without telling me where and why, she is always insulting me while looking for a fight with either bottle, hammer or the kitchen knife of which I have endured all these years because of our children, her pastor told me 8yrs ago that she will change but she is becoming more aggressive which has prompted me to cry out.,.what should I do...I need urgent advice

Under no circumstance should you put up with a violent partner

I can't trade anything for my happiness, not even marriage.

Do what you feel is right for you

My brother, it is well with your marriage. If you are a Christian, Divorce is not an option. I will advice that you separate from her for sometimes. Life is involved. This is how it starts and before you know it something bad will happen but God forbid. Go and report her to your people who will in turn report her to her people. Stay away from her for now. It is also dangerous, to bring up kids in that kind of environment . The children will grow up and become violent and aggressive. Children learn fast by example .
Finally, God is the institutor of marriage, Call unto him to give you peace in your marriage. God bless you.

You started with her in that manner, so u will end it with her in that manner.

Someone you share the same apartment with is always threatening you with weapons anytime you have any little misunderstanding and you still have the audacity to co habit with her for good 10 years. Baba, wait until she finally kills you . we will only mourn you on nairaland.

Mstick:
Instead of crying out online how about going to her family, tell them what you've just written, ask for a separation and if you see no change then you know what's best for you.

Dont blame him bro. Sometimes we find solace talking to faceless people. I understand perfectly.

God dey.