baby124:

Invite one of them for a week and, take some time off!

Will try to get her mum over. Thanks

This one na typical case of 'hunter shoot bird, im mama fly'...

FreemanTJ:


Will try to get her mum over. Thanks

Shame on you for putting your wife and mother of your child through all this. So, all the months you were sleeping with her, you felt nothing for her Or you just had cold feet because you did not think you were ready for marriage. No one forced you into that marriage, you married her willingly under rushed circumstances.

FreemanTJ:


They both dont live in lagos. Yes, I'll definitely try to work on this.

Work with your wife not the new lady,your wife seems to be more sensible.

baby124:

Shame on you for putting your wife and mother of your child through all this. So, all the months you were sleeping with her, you felt nothing for her Or you just had cold feet because you did not think you were ready for marriage. No one forced you into that marriage, you married her willingly under rushed circumstances.

We weren't dating. We were just friends and the marriage isnt based on love. I was trapped, she begged for the marriage. The plan was to take care of the baby once she delivers her but she insisted she would kill herself if I didn't marry her before the baby comes.

0ppa:
You impregnated her, and not 'she eventually got pregnant.' If you were so up and doing to get a lady pregnant, be ready to father the child; and stop thinking she needs your pity..and mind you, she is your wife now (even though you have both sinned on pre-marital basis). About your affair with the other dame, it is quite appalling many men are so indecisive in important matters. What I deduce from all your tales is that you are irresponsible -- please believe.

You nailed it.

ifyalways:

Work with your wife not the new lady,your wife seems to be more sensible.

To be honest I have no feelings for her. There's no guarantee we would both be happy in the marriage. The other lady may be dramatic but I dont blame her in any way.

FreemanTJ:


We weren't dating. We were just friends and the marriage isnt based on love. I was trapped, she begged for the marriage. The plan was to take care of the baby once she delivers her but she insisted she would kill herself if I didn't marry her before the baby comes.

How were you trapped? Did you have unprotected sex and come in her? Please stop trying to abscond from responsibility and take responsibility for the part you played. Can you honestly say that your anger at the pregnancy has stopped you from connecting with her? You seem to like women that are difficult and you delight in making them have sex with you. Then you start telling stories. Since you had this new girl at your beck and call, what made you hesitate on divorcing your wife?

Hmm
In marriage the Golden rule for men," Don't marry her if you don't love her"
The Golden rule for women, " Don't marry him if you can't see anything in him that will make you respect him"

You broke the rule
Now you want pity

Now take a good look at the mother of your daughter, do you still see love not pity for her if not free her forever

FreemanTJ:

To be honest I have no feelings for her. There's no guarantee we would both be happy in the marriage. The other lady may be dramatic but I dont blame her in any way.

Okay, Goodluck

baby124:

How were you trapped? Did you have unprotected sex and come in her? Please stop trying to abscond from responsibility and take responsibility for the part you played. Can you honestly say that your anger at the pregnancy has stopped you from connecting with her? You seem to like women that are difficult and you delight in making them have sex with you. Then you start telling stories. Since you had this new girl at your beck and call, what made you hesitate on divorcing your wife?

I have resorted to separation which is the first step to divorce. We dont live together as couples. I just haven't made it official. I wanted th baby out first then at least 6 months old before I started the process but as it is, things are now more complicated.

FreemanTJ:


I have resorted to separation which is the first step to divorce. We dont live together as couples. I just haven't made it official. I wanted th baby out first then at least 6 months old before I started the process but as it is, things are now more complicated.

The idea not to live together to her own understanding and what you made your wife believe is because of distance! You never even gave that relationship a chance because you felt *trapped*. I know you did not want that pregnancy or to get married at this time which is the grudge you are carrying against your wife! I advise you to forgive yourself, forgive her and try to make it work. Stop fighting everyone because you are the one that did the gbenshing and put the baby there. So, obviously, you liked her a lot at some point.

One thing that struck me is your girlfriends statement that the child looked like you. Which you then noticed!!! Were you at any point disputing paternity and, was that one of the stories you told madam girlfriend to get in her pants? You are a funny guy. You can bond and fall in love over chess but can’t love your own wife because she tied you down.

Your wife must be an angel to even rate you after all your bullshit behavior. Just look at the lunatic behavior your so called girlfriend displayed after finding out you were married? Compare that with your wife after all you have done to her You sure your girlfriend is really an angel? LOL

What a dawg

Many young married men are on this table anyway. Using lies to get single girls who dont like to date married men

this is what happens when u allow ur erection become ur direction in life

baby124:

The idea not to live together to her own understanding and what you made your wife believe is because of distance! You never even gave that relationship a chance because you felt *trapped*. I know you did not want that pregnancy or to get married at this time which is the grudge you are carrying against your wife! I advise you to forgive yourself, forgive her and try to make it work. Stop fighting everyone because you are the one that did the gbenshing and put the baby there. So, obviously, you liked her a lot at some point.

One thing that struck me is your girlfriends statement that the child looked like you. Which you then noticed!!! Were you at any point disputing paternity and, was that one of the stories you told madam girlfriend to get in her pants? You are a funny guy. You can bond and fall in love over chess but can’t love your own wife because she tied you down.

Your wife must be an angel to even rate you after all your bullshit behavior. Just look at the lunatic behavior your so called girlfriend displayed after finding out you were married? Compare that with your wife after all you have done to her You sure your girlfriend is really an angel? LOL

I'll disagree with calling her this.The Op consistently denied he was in a relationship (not to even say he was married),led her on and kept having sex with her.The girl has every right to go overboard and she did well without physically harming anyone.

baby124:

The idea not to live together to her own understanding and what you made your wife believe is because of distance! You never even gave that relationship a chance because you felt *trapped*. I know you did not want that pregnancy or to get married at this time which is the grudge you are carrying against your wife! I advise you to forgive yourself, forgive her and try to make it work. Stop fighting everyone because you are the one that did the gbenshing and put the baby there. So, obviously, you liked her a lot at some point.

One thing that struck me is your girlfriends statement that the child looked like you. Which you then noticed!!! Were you at any point disputing paternity and, was that one of the stories you told madam girlfriend to get in her pants? You are a funny guy. You can bond and fall in love over chess but can’t love your own wife because she tied you down.



Your wife must be an angel to even rate you after all your bullshit behavior. Just look at the lunatic behavior your so called girlfriend displayed after finding out you were married? Compare that with your wife after all you have done to her You sure your girlfriend is really an angel? LOL

My gf didnt know about the child until recently, and since that moment we haven't seen each other except talk on the phone. I and my wife didnt live together not just because of distance, it was one of the conditions I gave if I was to marry her. I didnt want to be around her.
Yes i agree my gf was wrong but guess what!!! her actions might be what is making me consider staying in the marriage and yes I did doubt the paternity because a relationship was never established, she was desperate to be married and I thought she was trying to tie me down with it.
It's okay for you to judge me. I agree I've been wrong and will do all in my power to mend my marriage but honestly cant guarantee forever and I have no intention of going back to the gf since she doesn't even want me either. All she ask when we talk if we are working on our marriage. She regrets her actions but according to her she had to do it else she would want to continue with the relationship but after revealing the truth to my wife, it will be impossible for her to continue the rship with me.

thorpido:
I'll disagree with calling her this.The Op consistently denied he was in a relationship (not to even say he was married),led her on and kept having sex with her.The girl has every right to go overboard and she did well without physically harming anyone.

That she stole his wedding pictures, opened a profile on Instagram and started stalking the wife till OP put his child’s picture up? Even blaming the innocent woman who doesn’t know what this OP is up to for not putting up her family picture to warn *girls* that he is married? That girlfriend is completely crazy!!! She has known from the get go that OP was married. She was playing along and looking for proof. When girl say they dream about this and that, they have seen evidence and just want you to admit. Her dream was too exact and vivid to be a revelation! Trust me!

FreemanTJ:

To be honest I have no feelings for her. There's no guarantee we would both be happy in the marriage. The other lady may be dramatic but I dont blame her in any way.

For me it's a hard one to be honest.If the feelings are not there as in your case,it will hardly come even if you both take a wkd off to be together.I've seen this play out in many relationships.

You are really the irresponsible guy here You seem not to have a direction.You just want to touch whatever glows.
Before you decide to eventually ditch this marriage,try to fix it.Tell your wife to move in with you.Both of you spend time to try to bond.If after 4months,it is still the same loveless marriage,you had better split.

FreemanTJ:


My gf didnt know about the child until recently, and since that moment we haven't seen each other except talk on the phone. I and my wife didnt live together not just because of distance, it was one of the conditions I gave if I was to marry her. I didnt want to be around her.
Yes i agree my gf was wrong but guess what!!! her actions might be what is making me consider staying in the marriage and yes I did doubt the paternity because a relationship was never established, she was desperate to be married and I thought she was trying to tie me down with it.
It's okay for you to judge me. I agree I've been wrong and will do all in my power to mend my marriage but honestly cant guarantee forever and I have no intention of going back to the gf since she doesn't even want me either. All she ask when we talk if we are working on our marriage. She regrets her actions but according to her she had to do it else she would want to continue with the relationship but after revealing the truth to my wife, it will be impossible for her to continue the rship with me.

OP, I have a question. Do you have a strong male presence in your life? How did you manage to make your wife, her parents and even your family agree to this arrangement not to live with your wife? Because you didn’t want to be around her? Is this a joke or a movie?

Is your family significantly richer than that if your wife? This is very strange to be honest. You really need a mentor with a stable family and you need to grow up. By the way, how old are you? Also, please, stop having unprotected sex up and down. You are a married man, carry yourself with some dignity and respect your wife. Smh!

You are still making cheap excuses about questioning paternity. That is what you convinced yourself to justify cheating on your wife. With your attitude, if you questioned paternity no body would have been able to make you marry your wife.

thorpido:
I'll disagree with calling her this.The Op consistently denied he was in a relationship (not to even say he was married),led her on and kept having sex with her.The girl has every right to go overboard and she did well without physically harming anyone.

Thank you for pointing that out. The gf is now the bad person because she isnt the married one. As women they really dont know what they're capable of until they're in someone else's position. She could have forgiven me. Kept quiet about it and insisted I divorced my wife which I was planning to do anyway.
Instead she reached out to my wife, asked for forgiveness and asked her to fix her marriage. At that moment it may seem unreasonable but if I choose to stay in my marriage I think she triggered it.

FreemanTJ:


Thank you for pointing that out. The gf is now the bad person because she isnt the married one. As women they really dont know what they're capable of until they're in someone else's position. She could have forgiven me. Kept quiet about it and insisted I divorced my wife which I was planning to do anyway.
Instead she reached out to my wife, asked for forgiveness and asked her to fix her marriage. At that moment it may seem unreasonable but if I choose to stay in my marriage I think she triggered it.

When I was single I was in your girlfriends shoes many times. Though no sexual contact because I suspected these men. There is something about a married man sometimes that they can’t hide. I did not go on a crazy spree, stealing private pictures and opening fake pages like a lunatic. Then attacking their wives because these men were trying to play me. I simply laughed it off, faced the nuisance married men and moved on.

She tried to wreck your marriage by confronting your wife and shaming her! Your wife didn’t blink but you did, so she retreated. She is checking on your marriage progress to see if you are serious about the divorce. Obviously you are a cheap player and she sees that you are an opportunist who wants to be married while living single.

baby124:

That she stole his wedding pictures, opened a profile on Instagram and started stalking the wife till OP put his child’s picture up? Even blaming the innocent woman who doesn’t know what this OP is up to for not putting up her family picture to warn *girls* that he is married? That girlfriend is completely crazy!!! She has known from the get go that OP was married. She was playing along and looking for proof. When girl say they dream about this and that, they have seen evidence and just want you to admit. Her dream was too exact and vivid to be a revelation! Trust me!

I really didnt think I'd argue revelations here as I dont believe it either, but before we even got really close or talked families, she dreamt about my brother travelling down to Lagos and that very day I got a call from my brother coming down to visit me in a weeks time. And there are several others. Her dreams are vivid and mostly accurate.

baby124:

That she stole his wedding pictures, opened a profile on Instagram and started stalking the wife till OP put his child’s picture up? Even blaming the innocent woman who doesn’t know what this OP is up to for not putting up her family picture to warn *girls* that he is married? That girlfriend is completely crazy!!! She has known from the get go that OP was married. She was playing along and looking for proof. When girl say they dream about this and that, they have seen evidence and just want you to admit. Her dream was too exact and vivid to be a revelation! Trust me!

She did all that to put the Op out there.She wanted the world to see he was married since he was hiding it anyway.It was a vengeful thing on her part but she was in an emotional turmoil at that time.

Well,she's wrong to blame the wife but she felt if the wife had put wedding pictures everywhere in space,it would have been easy for her to see the Op was married and not get involved.

I really do not believe she knew Op was married.It 's the reason why she's very upset about the whole thing.She was having sex with a married man in ignorance.That really riled her.
She had hunches but she didn't have proof he was married Her dreams were revelations for her.Some people just have that gift.

thorpido:
For me it's a hard one to be honest.If the feelings are not there as in your case,it will hardly come even if you both take a wkd off to be together.I've seen this play out in many relationships.

You are really the irresponsible guy here You seem not to have a direction.You just want to touch whatever glows.
Before you decide to eventually ditch this marriage,try to fix it.Tell your wife to move in with you.Both of you spend time to try to bond.If after 4months,it is still the same loveless marriage,you had better split.

Points taken and I admit I'm wrong. Thank you

thorpido:
She did all that to put the Op out there.She wanted the world to see he was married since he was hiding it anyway.It was a vengeful thing on her part but she was in an emotional turmoil at that time.

Well,she's wrong to blame the wife but she felt if the wife had put wedding pictures everywhere in space,it would have been easy for her to see the Op was married and not get involved.

I really do not believe she knew Op was married.It 's the reason why she's very upset about the whole thing.She was having sex with a married man in ignorance.That really riled her.
She had hunches but she didn't have proof he was married Her dreams were revelations for her.Some people just have that gift.

Is this a joke? She blame the wife when the wife does not even know she exists? What the wife does with her family and, how she chooses to expose her family on social media is solely the wife’s business. She is a lunatic to even bring the wife into this. She should have faced OP squarely and insulted him! Not his wife! She was trying to destroy the marriage! If OP’s wife was like her, the marriage would have ended and that is what she was counting on.

She definitely knew OP was married! Collecting his laptop to work with was to gather more evidence. She has been scheming all this since she knew. She purposely did not have unprotected sex with OP because she knew he was a questionable guy and probably most of his gist did not gel well.

I do t believe in all that revelation nonsense. FBI de play where I de. If you are married I will catch you and play you well when I was single.

FreemanTJ:


I really didnt think I'd argue revelations here as I dont believe it either, but before we even got really close or talked families, she dreamt about my brother travelling down to Lagos and that very day I got a call from my brother coming down to visit me in a weeks time. And there are several others. Her dreams are vivid and mostly accurate.

I don’t believe in all those dreams and revelations. Sorry.

baby124:

When I was single I was in your girlfriends shoes many times. Though no sexual contact because I suspected these men. There is something about a married man sometimes that they can’t hide. I did not go on a crazy spree, stealing private pictures and opening fake pages like a lunatic. Then attacking their wives because these men were trying to play me. I simply laughed it off, faced the nuisance married men and moved on.

She tried to wreck your marriage by confronting your wife and shaming her! Your wife didn’t blink but you did, so she retreated. She is checking on your marriage progress to see if you are serious about the divorce. Obviously you are a cheap player and she sees that you are an opportunist who wants to be married while living single.

I agree. Thank you for the vile words but I think you'd do worse than my gf if you were in her shoes. You just hate her because she's a gf and not a wife.

FreemanTJ:


Thank you for pointing that out. The gf is now the bad person because she isnt the married one. As women they really dont know what they're capable of until they're in someone else's position. She could have forgiven me. Kept quiet about it and insisted I divorced my wife which I was planning to do anyway.
Instead she reached out to my wife, asked for forgiveness and asked her to fix her marriage. At that moment it may seem unreasonable but if I choose to stay in my marriage I think she triggered it.

She had become involved with you,was in love and had invested emotionally only to find out she had been played.
She could forgive you but she didn't want to be quiet about it.She did the right thing to reach out to your wife and ask for her forgiveness.It was to satisfy her own conscience and for her future marriage so it doesn't come to bite her.

FreemanTJ:


I agree. Thank you for the vile words but I think you'd do worse than my gf if you were in her shoes. You just hate her because she's a gf and not a wife.

I don’t know her so I am incapable of hating her. Just telling you the bitter truth here. Your girlfriend is not stable and she will show you hell! Many married men have done worse behind their wives backs, only those who actually think there is a chance to displace the wife reach out to her. These are facts any woman will tell you.

baby124:

Is this a joke? She blame the wife when the wife does not even know she exists? What the wife does with her family and, how she chooses to expose her family on social media is solely the wife’s business. She is a lunatic to even bring the wife into this. She should have faced OP squarely and insulted him! Not his wife! She was trying to destroy the marriage! If OP’s wife was like her, the marriage would have ended and that is what she was counting on.

She definitely knew OP was married! Collecting his laptop to work with was to gather more evidence. She has been scheming all this since she knew. She purposely did not have unprotected sex with OP because she knew he was a questionable guy and probably most of his gist did not gel well.

I do t believe in all that revelation nonsense. FBI de play where I de. If you are married I will catch you and play you well when I was single.

Like I said she has no right to blame the wife but she just felt both of them not having their marital status out there made it hard for her to know Op's status.
She was only being careful@bolded.There are still girls that are smart.I honestly do not think she knew Op was married She only relied on her hunches.

You know everyone is not the same You can tell a liar from a mile off but many girls can't.I've seen too many cases of this same situation with many girls not to doubt Op's story especially if the spouse is not in the same city with the husband.

Story looks fake

thorpido:
Like I said she has no right to blame the wife but she just felt both of them not having their marital status out there made it hard for her to know Op's status.
She was only being careful@bolded.There are still girls that are smart.I honestly do not think she knew Op was married She only relied on her hunches.

You know everyone is not the same You can tell a liar from a mile off but many girls can't.I've seen too many cases of this same situation with many girls not to doubt Op's story especially if the spouse is not in the same city with the husband.

She broke her celibacy for him, she would have had unprotected sex with him if her conscience was clear. She was already calling him fiancé, getting him opportunities and planning traditional marriage with him. She knew his ways were not pure, she had done her research. OP needs serious cane. Smh. What a yeye man.

At no point do I advocate unprotected sex. But they had come far enough that if she didn’t have reservations she would have asked for a test and gbensh him unprotected