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Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Family / How Can I Stop Loving This Other Man. (7240 Views)
Nigerian Lady Seeks Advice On How To Stop Loving Her Husband / How Can One Handle "Ur Wife Sleeps With Other Man(men) Messages? / I Always See This Inside My Room Even Though It's Tiled, How Do I Stop It? (2) (3) (4)
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Re: How Can I Stop Loving This Other Man. by Olannajewel: 4:59pm On Dec 09, 2019 |
keeki:thank you |
Re: How Can I Stop Loving This Other Man. by Olannajewel: 5:00pm On Dec 09, 2019 |
UjuJoan2:thank you |
Re: How Can I Stop Loving This Other Man. by zeestone99(m): 5:10pm On Dec 09, 2019 |
Olannajewel: Have you asked yourself what he needs, you think you are the only one that needs something. Have you asked yourself the challenges and pains he's facing and soaking up inside him, what have you done for him apart from sex and requesting for money. You can't change who you are, just follow the new guy if that's what you want. It's only fair your husband knows the real you. Don't pretend. My 2 kobo. 2 Likes |
Re: How Can I Stop Loving This Other Man. by Olannajewel: 5:19pm On Dec 09, 2019 |
zeestone99:I know he has needs too, I'm open to do anything to make him happy, if only he would allow me.. because I said I am still offering my degree programme doesn't mean I have nothing to offer. I don't bring in money yet, but I offer constructive advices that bring in funds to us.I pray for us and am always willing to go out of my way to make him happy.... offering something doesn't have to be about money.. and I am not pretending, I love my husband and I adore and appreciate him, all I want is a friend in him, sweet compassionate man,like he used to be. Thanks for your opinion though. 3 Likes |
Re: How Can I Stop Loving This Other Man. by crackhaus: 5:26pm On Dec 09, 2019 |
UjuJoan2: 4 Likes |
Re: How Can I Stop Loving This Other Man. by Nobody: 5:29pm On Dec 09, 2019 |
Olannajewel:you don’t bring in MONEY but your hormones are raging to cheat! How about you go use your constructive advice and prayers to foot your own damn bills!.. C’mon cover your face abeg! You fall hand! I don’t blame men that don’t put all their resources on a woman. Na your type dey give women bad name! You’re already sexchatting.. very soon you go off pant! Odiegwu!..Mtcheew “I love my husband and adore him” yen yen yen!!!.. Na you get yourself, no stress us abeg! 7 Likes |
Re: How Can I Stop Loving This Other Man. by bukatyne(f): 5:35pm On Dec 09, 2019 |
Olannajewel: @bold You can't love your husband and love Mr. Telegraph. He has been sweet before, he can be sweet again. Except you tell me that when you go with Mr. Telegraph and he is no longer sweet due to life's issues, you would jump to Mr. What'sapp. 2 Likes 1 Share |
Re: How Can I Stop Loving This Other Man. by Nobody: 5:37pm On Dec 09, 2019 |
Lol, Nigerians and their hypocritical nature. Just lookat d men gesticulating up their like kini. Do not rush to comment, simply take a Lil while and walk in d Op's shoes in ur head then u can comment. Is it so hard to advise her on how to get her marriage on d right track? For idiotic fools that say women have nothing to offer, dat frustration will eat you'll up. What the op is passing through happen, Infact if it were to be a man I'm sure he would have slept with d girl by now. Cut the op a some. Abraham Maslow wasn't a fool to include "Love and belonhing" in his hierarchy of Needs 13 Likes
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Re: How Can I Stop Loving This Other Man. by Olannajewel: 5:42pm On Dec 09, 2019 |
yettymuse:so all you can offer is money? it's good you share the bills and that makes you feel that you are more of a woman than I am. One day I will share bills too, soon! So because I don't bring in money yet my hormones shouldn't function again?. I am living and it's a good thing that my hormones are functioning... just a reminder, this phase of my life and my want for emotional satisfaction does not define me, daalu kwa. 12 Likes |
Re: How Can I Stop Loving This Other Man. by Nobody: 5:46pm On Dec 09, 2019 |
Olannajewel:Its alright then, I hope you don’t let your emotions get the better of you! When reality sets in, Bills is major! By the way, why do you wanna give your coochie to a brokeass? I bet Mr Telegram can’t pay shishi! Women! Na we confuse pass!! you’ll be fine girl... Get yourself some intimacy gadgets, masturbate and watch porn! Cheers! 3 Likes 1 Share |
Re: How Can I Stop Loving This Other Man. by Olannajewel: 5:48pm On Dec 09, 2019 |
bukatyne:I know am infatuated about my telegram friend, probably because he tells me all I want to hear.but that doesn't erase the fact that my husband means so much to me, but I alone know how much I suffer, I need him to be my friend again. Thank you . 6 Likes |
Re: How Can I Stop Loving This Other Man. by crackhaus: 5:55pm On Dec 09, 2019 |
bukatyne:Emotional availability or financial provision, which one is a bigger problem when lacking? |
Re: How Can I Stop Loving This Other Man. by Olannajewel: 5:59pm On Dec 09, 2019 |
yettymuse:until then, now and forever as long as am living my hormones will yearn for what it rightfully need.. it suprise me to know that the only form of romance you know is the insertion of genitals, hahahaha, just like me, sis you lack!! when I will have to share Bills, I will, money is not meant to be eaten raw.. and am not trying to give my cookie to a broke ass, neither am I obligated to set straight this talk, just because your life's orientation is based on money,and just because you pay the bills, doesn't make you better than me. Thanks for reminding me that all that matter to people like you is money. 9 Likes |
Re: How Can I Stop Loving This Other Man. by bukatyne(f): 6:03pm On Dec 09, 2019 |
crackhaus: Depends on who's asking. The OP has the money however she's not satisfied. Is money to meet one's needs important, yes. However, we are not one dimensional beings. When we pass the survival stage like the OP, we yearn for other things which are also legitimate. 4 Likes |
Re: How Can I Stop Loving This Other Man. by CAPTIVATOR: 6:13pm On Dec 09, 2019 |
AwkaetitiBabe: I actually dont support adultery, never! But I like your point, Many people rush to comment and blame the OP , whereas they would have done worse if in her shoes . its high time many realize Money alone is not enough, emotional closeness is important in marriage too, No wonder even the bible said " Husband's, Keep ON loving your wives. " it says " Keep on " which means an action that must continue or else she seeks it elsewhere. Even some ladies blaming the Op do worse, So much for hypocritical comments 4 Likes 1 Share |
Re: How Can I Stop Loving This Other Man. by CAPTIVATOR: 6:15pm On Dec 09, 2019 |
Olannajewel: Talk to your husband, What you demand is right ... Even the bible says ' Husbands continue loving your wife ' , There is a reason for the bolded. 2 Likes |
Re: How Can I Stop Loving This Other Man. by UjuJoan2: 6:16pm On Dec 09, 2019 |
crackhaus: What? It's true na. Nothing forces a man to sit up more than knowing there's someone else out there desperately seeking for his wife attention. Men don't know that they have to keep the romance alive in their marriage too. It's not just the women that have to keep slim, look sexy and slay to keep their men's attention. The man also has to keep the fire burning for his wife too, however he manages to do that. For some it's money, for others it's 'love and romance', for some it's even mad crazy sex. The key is finding whatever does it for her and working hard at it. If not, she's just a crazy opportunity away from cheating. 6 Likes |
Re: How Can I Stop Loving This Other Man. by CAPTIVATOR: 6:19pm On Dec 09, 2019 |
UjuJoan2: Thank you. African man mentality most times is that money is all, While women also make mistake getting married for Money whereas their heart is somewhere else. This things causes issues big tyme 6 Likes |
Re: How Can I Stop Loving This Other Man. by UjuJoan2: 6:20pm On Dec 09, 2019 |
bukatyne: Does it even end I mean at what point do we stop yearning for something . . . Anything I think it comes to a point when the woman just has to realize that she can't have it all, appreciate the ones she has, ignore the ones she doesn't and just accept the fact that the grass is NEVER greener on the other side |
Re: How Can I Stop Loving This Other Man. by UjuJoan2: 6:22pm On Dec 09, 2019 |
AwkaetitiBabe: So so true @ the bolded. If she were a man she would have done the deed already! |
Re: How Can I Stop Loving This Other Man. by UjuJoan2: 6:23pm On Dec 09, 2019 |
yettymuse: It's because she's not hungry. Her husband is already providing the money so she's searching for the component he's not providing. 1 Like |
Re: How Can I Stop Loving This Other Man. by crackhaus: 6:27pm On Dec 09, 2019 |
bukatyne:Then this is what you ladies should be helping her develop - satisfaction and nothing else. Encouraging her desires will only validate her feelings for the Telegram guy, which is a very good idea if the end goal is to ensure she cheats on her husband. My dear Ujujoan2 is even telling her to threaten the husband...husband oo, not boyfriend. Nothing I no go read for family section. I'm sure even after the man starts providing this emotional whatnot, the next request will be for him to start helping with the house chores, because some women have convinced themselves they are Princesses with no Kingdom. I can't mehn... Woman did not kill my grandfathers and woman has not killed my father, it is impossible for a woman to kill me. 4 Likes |
Re: How Can I Stop Loving This Other Man. by Olannajewel: 6:37pm On Dec 09, 2019 |
crackhaus:I am satisfied, I just want a little compassion, and romance.. nothing more! 1 Like |
Re: How Can I Stop Loving This Other Man. by crackhaus: 6:39pm On Dec 09, 2019 |
UjuJoan2:This mind game only works if you're 100% sure the man has the patience for such antics. 3 Likes |
Re: How Can I Stop Loving This Other Man. by UjuJoan2: 6:40pm On Dec 09, 2019 |
crackhaus: It's not a threat . . . More like a warning, or an advance notice. Maybe he truly believes she can never be tempted, and him not satisfying her emotional needs doesn't matter. He needs to know that he's leaving her vulnerable, he's creating an environment for her to cheat. I think she owes him that. 2 Likes |
Re: How Can I Stop Loving This Other Man. by crackhaus: 6:46pm On Dec 09, 2019 |
Olannajewel:Is true |
Re: How Can I Stop Loving This Other Man. by UjuJoan2: 6:47pm On Dec 09, 2019 |
crackhaus: I think you're getting it all wrong. It's not a game. Believe me those feelings she's having are as real as it gets. She needs her husband to understand how his actions are affecting her. My husband used to do something really stupid whenever we had a disagreement. And he did it because he could, and I couldn't. So I gently told him one day that I may not be able to do exactly what he does, but I have other ways to 'get back' at him if I wanted to. . . . And I gave him an example. It wasn't a threat. Bottom line is that people need to understand how their actions (or inactions) affect their spouses, and the possible repercussions. Sometimes they don't really know. 3 Likes |
Re: How Can I Stop Loving This Other Man. by bukatyne(f): 6:51pm On Dec 09, 2019 |
crackhaus: If her husband was never 'sweet', she probably have ignored as he was her choice. He was and has now become cold. Like they say: Don't start what you cannot finish. 2 Likes |
Re: How Can I Stop Loving This Other Man. by bukatyne(f): 6:53pm On Dec 09, 2019 |
UjuJoan2: He was before, that is the thing. |
Re: How Can I Stop Loving This Other Man. by UjuJoan2: 6:56pm On Dec 09, 2019 |
bukatyne: Yeah . . . I guess that's what's worrisome about this whole thing. The fact that he can, because he used to, but just won't, for whatever reason. So he doesn't thinks she's worth the effort anymore. That's why I say she 'warns' him in a very subtle way . . . . Just so he's aware of the consequences of his actions. |
Re: How Can I Stop Loving This Other Man. by bukatyne(f): 6:59pm On Dec 09, 2019 |
UjuJoan2: Hababahaha! Not necessarily. |
Re: How Can I Stop Loving This Other Man. by bukatyne(f): 7:01pm On Dec 09, 2019 |
UjuJoan2: True, one needs to learn contentment. However, it hurts when you had something before and it is withdrawn suddenly. 1 Like 1 Share |
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