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How I Learnt My Lessons In Hard Way,men Are Generally Wicked.. - Romance (3) - Nairaland

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Re: How I Learnt My Lessons In Hard Way,men Are Generally Wicked.. by Nobody: 10:05pm On Jan 08, 2020
SlimyJ:
Currently I'm in tears,my heart is disturbed...
I'm a single mother of one boy (4years old),my first relationship cracked based on family issues mainly the guy's mom,she claimed she can't allow me to marry his son cause I'm TOO EXPENSIVE,she married another girl for him,my baby was just 9months old then,after lot of patching up, everyday beating, cheating and violence,we decided to quit the marriage. He didn't bother to take care of the child at all,things became difficult for me but my mom has been there all through,I went back to learn hair making,beads making and cake making which I did my freedom and had my certificate,God has been so faithful to me and I'm flourishing,then I met a guy earlier last year...
He is a graduate,he is loving and looks calm,he do carry me along in everything he does,he even loved my son and he do pay partly out all his bills, he is free with my family and friends,behold I thought I found love.....
July last year,I had to travel out of the country for a business trip,the trip should have lasted for 6months,but unfortunately I spent only a month there cause of some reasons,I had to call this guy that I will be coming home earlier than we planned,our plans was that after I'm back we will get married,I was shocked when he told me on phone that he did a mistake when I left for just a month and put another woman in a family way,I was very hurt,I wept and shouted,we were not on speaking terms when I entered the country,but he pleaded together with his friends and he suggested that the lady will abort the pregnancy,I told him I don't buy that idea that he should just let me be and he should face the girl,few days later he came back begging that the girl already aborted the pregnancy that can I see now that God wanted us to marry, he even told me to get pregnant and I replied I can't make another mistake until he walks me down the aisle,after a long talk in days we resolved the issue and we were back together,he even do pampered me than before. Lately I discovered that any little issues always result to arguments,I suddenly don't no how to do anything good anymore,he is one day cold and the second day harsh. At mid November,I decided to call him to attention that why is he just like that,and he said he is not happy cause he is broke,we started praying together for better days, he do call me close to 6 times in a day but suddenly changed to twice a day and later he switched to calling once in two days, though we do chat.
To cut my long story short,on the 30th of December,he just called me that he will be going to his town for the new year festival,I was like when have you been planning that and he said not long,on the cross over night he called to pray for me at exactly 12:02am and we were both happy,then he stopped calling for two days. On Saturday 4th of January,he called very early to greet me,then I discovered he had cattarh ,I told him to go to the clinic and treat himself he said he doesn't have any money on him,I sent him some cash to treat himself,he chatted me frequently ,he even called me more than 10 times that day,I wasn't even suspicious and we've been cool since then..
Last night he called me that he is back and will like to take me for breakfast this morning and get me some things from the store. We were at the pounded yam kitchen when some messages entered my WhatsApp inbox ,I managed to open with my left hand,to my greatest surprised they were images of this guy's introduction on that very Saturday with that same girl he told me had aborted the pregnancy,I was so shocked,I lost my appetite immediately and I bursted out into tears,he wasn't even remorseful,all he only said was that ....I've heard and I've heard be that....
I've been weeping since then, mummies in the house,are men really this wicked??
was your dad this wicked to your mum?learn to stop asking general questions, learn to categorise e.g "why are most men wicked?".
Re: How I Learnt My Lessons In Hard Way,men Are Generally Wicked.. by Collins4u1(m): 10:11pm On Jan 08, 2020
Women can do worse.

Sorry, may we never be victim of pretence and fake love. Ka chi Foo nụ.

2 Likes

Re: How I Learnt My Lessons In Hard Way,men Are Generally Wicked.. by capnies: 10:17pm On Jan 08, 2020
My dear I feel your pains the first thing I will advise you to do hand over yourself to God. You see Gods laws are for our good. If we follow it, all these pains will not exist. I can assure you if you follow God wholeheartedly He will give you your' loving husband without hassle. Secondly if possible go to higher institution it will increase the respect you get from men. Love you

1 Like

Re: How I Learnt My Lessons In Hard Way,men Are Generally Wicked.. by Nobody: 10:49pm On Jan 08, 2020
Take heart...women do worst to men

1 Like

Re: How I Learnt My Lessons In Hard Way,men Are Generally Wicked.. by tunize(m): 10:56pm On Jan 08, 2020
Not all men. Women does same too, truth is u met the wrong person i feel ur pain but life has to go on.......u see that guy live am for God.

1 Like

Re: How I Learnt My Lessons In Hard Way,men Are Generally Wicked.. by tunize(m): 10:58pm On Jan 08, 2020
Coded2:
Hmmm I'm so sorry for the Bleep up of the guy but not all men are the same the Yoruba will say enitolori koni fila those who have head didn't have the cap while those who have the cap doesnt have the head such is life irony.
Na true talk papi....life is all about jst b plain chikina
Re: How I Learnt My Lessons In Hard Way,men Are Generally Wicked.. by FanOfMyself: 11:15pm On Jan 08, 2020
Stillthebest:
kiss

And you actually thought he wanted you from the beginning? Have u met indecisive guys before? Have you met real players before? Well you just met one. You haven't just met a guy thats worth it.

He was enjoying the honey pot till it lasted. Now that he thought in his jelly fish-like brain that he had taken his own share he vamoose. Or were you not faithful to him?
He was actually taking you for the ride. He was keeping the lady even before you went to Dubai(sorry) travelled abroad

Why were you so expensive for your ex? They thought you were expensive or you were just expensive?

Well, you might need to cut down being expensive to meet a real man!

Such is life madam you will be alright las Las.

Real men I repeat, real men that will stay with you forever are not unnecessarily nice. Same with women. Any personality who portrays over nicety, tip toe in their presence.

4 Likes

Re: How I Learnt My Lessons In Hard Way,men Are Generally Wicked.. by Oluwahelpme(m): 11:47pm On Jan 08, 2020
SlimyJ:


He did the introduction with another single mom..
How are you doing today? I will like to be ur friend. I want to keep ur company. Don't let that guy's issue stop u from loving.

2 Likes

Re: How I Learnt My Lessons In Hard Way,men Are Generally Wicked.. by uthlaw: 12:05am On Jan 09, 2020
SaintsSamurai:
Sorry my dear but you have been a side chick to him without you knowing.

The lady he got pregnant is his main chick and that was why he did her introduction.

His friends, the same friend that came to beg you to forgive him when he got the main chick pregnant, is the same friend that sent you his introduction photos because he don't want you to continue wasting your time.

I am going to be very honest with you.
My dear count your losses and move on with your Life, focus on yourself and your son for now.

I think Ladies should start uploading pictures of any guy they want to start a relationship with, on social media. Be it Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, 2go, nairaland, etc

So that any Lady that is in relationship with the men will come outside and claim him or any body that knows about him can start telling you about him.

This way, cheating will reduce, heartbreak will be no more and any man that is not claimed on social media for one month is indeed your man.

Saint samurai has spoken, court rise!!!!!!
they can't do that because they cheat more than guys.... married men included in their own list!

1 Like

Re: How I Learnt My Lessons In Hard Way,men Are Generally Wicked.. by oyatz(m): 1:06am On Jan 09, 2020
What if the main Chick is not on social media or not on her contact on social media?




SaintsSamurai:
Sorry my dear but you have been a side chick to him without you knowing.

The lady he got pregnant is his main chick and that was why he did her introduction.

His friends, the same friend that came to beg you to forgive him when he got the main chick pregnant, is the same friend that sent you his introduction photos because he don't want you to continue wasting your time.

I am going to be very honest with you.
My dear count your losses and move on with your Life, focus on yourself and your son for now.

I think Ladies should start uploading pictures of any guy they want to start a relationship with, on social media. Be it Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, 2go, nairaland, etc

So that any Lady that is in relationship with the men will come outside and claim him or any body that knows about him can start telling you about him.

This way, cheating will reduce, heartbreak will be no more and any man that is not claimed on social media for one month is indeed your man.

Saint samurai has spoken, court rise!!!!!!
Re: How I Learnt My Lessons In Hard Way,men Are Generally Wicked.. by oyatz(m): 1:11am On Jan 09, 2020
Naija guys have no choice than to start marrying these single mothers.


Who made them baby mamas?


In the next twenty years, about 25% of ladies between 25-30yrs will be single mothers. Who do you think will marry them?



2dice01:
Sorry madam

I guess the best thing is you channeling all your love to your Son cus most naija guys find it hard settling down with someone else Babymama
Re: How I Learnt My Lessons In Hard Way,men Are Generally Wicked.. by culf: 2:30am On Jan 09, 2020
SlimyJ:
Currently I'm in tears,my heart is disturbed...
I'm a single mother of one boy (4years old),my first relationship cracked based on family issues mainly the guy's mom,she claimed she can't allow me to marry his son cause I'm TOO EXPENSIVE,she married another girl for him,my baby was just 9months old then,after lot of patching up, everyday beating, cheating and violence,we decided to quit the marriage. He didn't bother to take care of the child at all,things became difficult for me but my mom has been there all through,I went back to learn hair making,beads making and cake making which I did my freedom and had my certificate,God has been so faithful to me and I'm flourishing,then I met a guy earlier last year...
He is a graduate,he is loving and looks calm,he do carry me along in everything he does,he even loved my son and he do pay partly out all his bills, he is free with my family and friends,behold I thought I found love.....
July last year,I had to travel out of the country for a business trip,the trip should have lasted for 6months,but unfortunately I spent only a month there cause of some reasons,I had to call this guy that I will be coming home earlier than we planned,our plans was that after I'm back we will get married,I was shocked when he told me on phone that he did a mistake when I left for just a month and put another woman in a family way,I was very hurt,I wept and shouted,we were not on speaking terms when I entered the country,but he pleaded together with his friends and he suggested that the lady will abort the pregnancy,I told him I don't buy that idea that he should just let me be and he should face the girl,few days later he came back begging that the girl already aborted the pregnancy that can I see now that God wanted us to marry, he even told me to get pregnant and I replied I can't make another mistake until he walks me down the aisle,after a long talk in days we resolved the issue and we were back together,he even do pampered me than before. Lately I discovered that any little issues always result to arguments,I suddenly don't no how to do anything good anymore,he is one day cold and the second day harsh. At mid November,I decided to call him to attention that why is he just like that,and he said he is not happy cause he is broke,we started praying together for better days, he do call me close to 6 times in a day but suddenly changed to twice a day and later he switched to calling once in two days, though we do chat.
To cut my long story short,on the 30th of December,he just called me that he will be going to his town for the new year festival,I was like when have you been planning that and he said not long,on the cross over night he called to pray for me at exactly 12:02am and we were both happy,then he stopped calling for two days. On Saturday 4th of January,he called very early to greet me,then I discovered he had cattarh ,I told him to go to the clinic and treat himself he said he doesn't have any money on him,I sent him some cash to treat himself,he chatted me frequently ,he even called me more than 10 times that day,I wasn't even suspicious and we've been cool since then..
Last night he called me that he is back and will like to take me for breakfast this morning and get me some things from the store. We were at the pounded yam kitchen when some messages entered my WhatsApp inbox ,I managed to open with my left hand,to my greatest surprised they were images of this guy's introduction on that very Saturday with that same girl he told me had aborted the pregnancy,I was so shocked,I lost my appetite immediately and I bursted out into tears,he wasn't even remorseful,all he only said was that ....I've heard and I've heard be that....
I've been weeping since then, mummies in the house,are men really this wicked??


generally, men are not really that wicked, you unfortunately met the wrong guys and probably ignored the warning signs.

2 Likes

Re: How I Learnt My Lessons In Hard Way,men Are Generally Wicked.. by tribalmall: 3:10am On Jan 09, 2020
But how can any man be this heartless to a woman ?

2 Likes

Re: How I Learnt My Lessons In Hard Way,men Are Generally Wicked.. by Timekeeper: 5:51am On Jan 09, 2020
rosy1992:
Never trust a guy. I wish you the best but such is life. Brace yourself up, and focus on your child and yourself. If love comes next time, you should love with your mind not heart.


Like saying never trust a woman too abi

2 Likes

Re: How I Learnt My Lessons In Hard Way,men Are Generally Wicked.. by Bestinstinct(m): 6:19am On Jan 09, 2020
It's just one sided story but I sympathize with OP. As a guy, I won't blame the guy completely till I hear his side. He's just stupid not to have broken up with you earlier.
Re: How I Learnt My Lessons In Hard Way,men Are Generally Wicked.. by SlimyJ: 9:30am On Jan 09, 2020
Bestinstinct:
It's just one sided story but I sympathize with OP. As a guy, I won't blame the guy completely till I hear his side. He's just stupid not to have broken up with you earlier.
yes, that exactly hurts me most,he just got himself a comfortable sit in my life and started wasting my time
Re: How I Learnt My Lessons In Hard Way,men Are Generally Wicked.. by oodua1stson: 9:32am On Jan 09, 2020
Wow! This is sad. As I bad reach I can never do this
Re: How I Learnt My Lessons In Hard Way,men Are Generally Wicked.. by Aarenasbaba(m): 9:35am On Jan 09, 2020
Men will always wicked if you haven't met d right one
Re: How I Learnt My Lessons In Hard Way,men Are Generally Wicked.. by SlimyJ: 10:02am On Jan 09, 2020
Aarenasbaba:
Men will always wicked if you haven't met d right one
humm
it is well..

1 Like

Re: How I Learnt My Lessons In Hard Way,men Are Generally Wicked.. by Escabado: 10:11am On Jan 09, 2020
[quote author=SlimyJ post=85610603]Currently I'm in tears,my heart is disturbed...
I'm a single mother of one boy (4years

Madam listen to me , is not a matter of been wicked or not . No avarage young Nigerian man will marry a woman that already have a child for another man. Even if he marry you just know he has something at the back of his mind . Nigeria is not USA , Nigerians are wise. you as a girl if you were single with no child will you agree to marry an already married man with kids or any man with kids. men are not Fools
Re: How I Learnt My Lessons In Hard Way,men Are Generally Wicked.. by Zubi10(m): 11:11am On Jan 09, 2020
Maaam am sorry to say this you're arrogant too..He always do the calling .If he don't call you don't call.... He checked so many things before he go ahead with introduction with that same girl....Just Burry arrogant n pride..
Re: How I Learnt My Lessons In Hard Way,men Are Generally Wicked.. by MizzPhoney(f): 11:34am On Jan 09, 2020
I'm sorry, kai! I don't even know what or how to say it. Please be strong, you will be alright lass lass.
I don't know why he couldn't just accept to marry the girl when you suggested it. He wanted to use you to pay her bride wealth. That was why he was complaining about being broke... Some men are scum walahi!

1 Like

Re: How I Learnt My Lessons In Hard Way,men Are Generally Wicked.. by Bestinstinct(m): 11:59am On Jan 09, 2020
SlimyJ:

yes, that exactly hurts me most,he just got himself a comfortable sit in my life and started wasting my time

Are you sure you guys never had any quarell in the past that bothers on trust? He might say he's forgiven you but left you to date yourself. Just thinking from a guys perspective..m

1 Like

Re: How I Learnt My Lessons In Hard Way,men Are Generally Wicked.. by SlimyJ: 12:04pm On Jan 09, 2020
Zubi10:
Maaam am sorry to say this you're arrogant too..He always do the calling .If he don't call you don't call.... He checked so many things before he go ahead with introduction with that same girl....Just Burry arrogant n pride..
Not that I'm arrogant,not that I don't have call cards ,I do call him too before he started his cold behaviors in November that he doesn't pick calls once and if he picked he will only say babe,lemme call you back when I'm free,and I don't want it to look like I'm choking him.
so since then I blended with him calling me only and since we do chat ,I don't see it as big deal..
Re: How I Learnt My Lessons In Hard Way,men Are Generally Wicked.. by SlimyJ: 12:16pm On Jan 09, 2020
Bestinstinct:


Are you sure you guys never had any quarell in the past that bothers on trust? He might say he's forgiven you but left you to date yourself. Just thinking from a guys perspective..m
The only issue we had was in October,a lady has been frequently tagging only him on his Facebook wall,I jokingly ask him who that lady was,cause to me I believe if I don't know you better I can't be tagging only you,he said she is his ex girlfriend and I sparked up that why would his ex girlfriend still be tagging him ,he was very angry that he said the Facebook account belongs to him and anybody can tag him on any post. I was so annoyed that I changed my phone password from the one he knows,and anytime he wants to access my phone I do tell him that it also belongs to me,since then I stayed off his social media activities cause I don't want to appear too jealous..
Re: How I Learnt My Lessons In Hard Way,men Are Generally Wicked.. by SlimyJ: 12:25pm On Jan 09, 2020
[quote author=Escabado post=85638005][/quote]
why do you people believe that we all wrote our destinies,sir not all single mothers became single mothers cause they are wayward,not all are not decent and not all are lazy, nobody is willing to have a broken marriage,I left my first marriage cause I don't want to die Young,are you saying I could have stayed there receiving the beatings till I die cause I don't want to be a single mother?
sir,I don't think single motherhood is the problem here cause he went ahead to do introduction with another single mom..

2 Likes

Re: How I Learnt My Lessons In Hard Way,men Are Generally Wicked.. by Bestinstinct(m): 12:25pm On Jan 09, 2020
SlimyJ:

The only issue we had was in October,a lady has been frequently tagging only him on his Facebook wall,I jokingly ask him who that lady was,cause to me I believe if I don't know you better I can't be tagging only you,he said she is his ex girlfriend and I sparked up that why would his ex girlfriend still be tagging him ,he was very angry that he said the Facebook account belongs to him and anybody can tag him on any post. I was so annoyed that I changed my phone password from the one he knows,and anytime he wants to access my phone I do tell him that it also belongs to me,since then I stayed off his social media activities cause I don't want to appear too jealous..
Chai! Things we guys do eehh..but women too do same anyway. Just get busy..get a chat buddy...not Bleep buddy o. Don't allow yourself get used o. You'll be fine. This reminds me of a corper I dated years back, we were cool and she was even begging me to cement the relationship so she can stay. I told her to at least go back and spend a month with her peeps b4 thinking of coming back. You wont believe I saw her wedding pictures on FB 2weeks after. I just congratulated her and laughed it off cos she's like No.8 on my list. But your own case weak me I swear..Be fine please

1 Like

Re: How I Learnt My Lessons In Hard Way,men Are Generally Wicked.. by Oluwahelpme(m): 12:38pm On Jan 09, 2020
SlimyJ:

why do you people believe that we all wrote our destinies,sir not all single mothers became single mothers cause they are wayward,not all are not decent and not all are lazy, nobody is willing to have a broken marriage,I left my first marriage cause I don't want to die Young,are you saying I could have stayed there receiving the beatings till I die cause I don't want to be a single mother?
sir,I don't think single motherhood is the problem here cause he went ahead to do introduction with another single mom..
I have told you to forget about this guy. move on with your life, he doesn't worth ur time ok. lady I will like to meet u in person.

1 Like

Re: How I Learnt My Lessons In Hard Way,men Are Generally Wicked.. by SlimyJ: 12:42pm On Jan 09, 2020
Bestinstinct:

Chai! Things we guys do eehh..but women too do same anyway. Just get busy..get a chat buddy...not Bleep buddy o. Don't allow yourself get used o. You'll be fine. This reminds me of a corper I dated years back, we were cool and she was even begging me to cement the relationship so she can stay. I told her to at least go back and spend a month with her peeps b4 thinking of coming back. You wont believe I saw her wedding pictures on FB 2weeks after. I just congratulated her and laughed it off cos she's like No.8 on my list. But your own case weak me I swear..Be fine please

Haa
No8??
una do well bro

it is well o
Re: How I Learnt My Lessons In Hard Way,men Are Generally Wicked.. by Nobody: 12:49pm On Jan 09, 2020
It's not about men or women being wicked, humans are just mean.
SlimyJ:
Currently I'm in tears,my heart is disturbed...
I'm a single mother of one boy (4years old),my first relationship cracked based on family issues mainly the guy's mom,she claimed she can't allow me to marry his son cause I'm TOO EXPENSIVE,she married another girl for him,my baby was just 9months old then,after lot of patching up, everyday beating, cheating and violence,we decided to quit the marriage. He didn't bother to take care of the child at all,things became difficult for me but my mom has been there all through,I went back to learn hair making,beads making and cake making which I did my freedom and had my certificate,God has been so faithful to me and I'm flourishing,then I met a guy earlier last year...
He is a graduate,he is loving and looks calm,he do carry me along in everything he does,he even loved my son and he do pay partly out all his bills, he is free with my family and friends,behold I thought I found love.....
July last year,I had to travel out of the country for a business trip,the trip should have lasted for 6months,but unfortunately I spent only a month there cause of some reasons,I had to call this guy that I will be coming home earlier than we planned,our plans was that after I'm back we will get married,I was shocked when he told me on phone that he did a mistake when I left for just a month and put another woman in a family way,I was very hurt,I wept and shouted,we were not on speaking terms when I entered the country,but he pleaded together with his friends and he suggested that the lady will abort the pregnancy,I told him I don't buy that idea that he should just let me be and he should face the girl,few days later he came back begging that the girl already aborted the pregnancy that can I see now that God wanted us to marry, he even told me to get pregnant and I replied I can't make another mistake until he walks me down the aisle,after a long talk in days we resolved the issue and we were back together,he even do pampered me than before. Lately I discovered that any little issues always result to arguments,I suddenly don't no how to do anything good anymore,he is one day cold and the second day harsh. At mid November,I decided to call him to attention that why is he just like that,and he said he is not happy cause he is broke,we started praying together for better days, he do call me close to 6 times in a day but suddenly changed to twice a day and later he switched to calling once in two days, though we do chat.
To cut my long story short,on the 30th of December,he just called me that he will be going to his town for the new year festival,I was like when have you been planning that and he said not long,on the cross over night he called to pray for me at exactly 12:02am and we were both happy,then he stopped calling for two days. On Saturday 4th of January,he called very early to greet me,then I discovered he had cattarh ,I told him to go to the clinic and treat himself he said he doesn't have any money on him,I sent him some cash to treat himself,he chatted me frequently ,he even called me more than 10 times that day,I wasn't even suspicious and we've been cool since then..
Last night he called me that he is back and will like to take me for breakfast this morning and get me some things from the store. We were at the pounded yam kitchen when some messages entered my WhatsApp inbox ,I managed to open with my left hand,to my greatest surprised they were images of this guy's introduction on that very Saturday with that same girl he told me had aborted the pregnancy,I was so shocked,I lost my appetite immediately and I bursted out into tears,he wasn't even remorseful,all he only said was that ....I've heard and I've heard be that....
I've been weeping since then, mummies in the house,are men really this wicked??

1 Like

Re: How I Learnt My Lessons In Hard Way,men Are Generally Wicked.. by Bestinstinct(m): 12:55pm On Jan 09, 2020
SlimyJ:


Haa
No8??
una do well bro

it is well o
Babe...e no easy like that now o. Philandering is now very expensive. Left that to fuckbois
Re: How I Learnt My Lessons In Hard Way,men Are Generally Wicked.. by samson07(m): 2:06pm On Jan 09, 2020
[quote author=Shibaraba post=85611309]Even me wey get bad mouth dey touched

I can't advise you but I'll say this, to those out there supporting divorce upandan this is one of the results in the long run. No man, I repeat, no man is comfortable with a woman that was once married especially single mamas. If them dey na 1%. Those 1% will still cheat. We will tell you we don't care, we love you, blah blah blah, but na for the kpomo .After chawing it na to look for chassis tear rubber. Some will attack this you don talk am finish

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