ericsmith:




I can @least relate with ur last comment buh on a quickie lemme ask .... when you are dating or in a r/ship are there issues you consider personal shit or is it everything you are going thru you share with ur boyfriend, emphasis on "everything"

It depends on what it is. Some things I'm comfortable sharing & some... not so much. I don't keep people I care about in the dark though. I may not go into it, in too many words, but just to put it out there so they don't assume they're at fault. I'm a very considerate person when it comes to that. I respect people's time & emotions, that's why I can't stand it when mine is wasted or toyed with. I fit kill persin

You sure u haven't done anything to him? search yourself..

bdchange:

You have a strong point when you said there are moments we want to be alone and have our time to ourselves. But when you are in a relationship especially committed one not just randy bf or gf stuff, you owed it to your partner to communicate with each other any issues that you may be facing. You have to be open to each other and see how you can help each other when issues arises. But when you don't communicate with me during the time you are on distress, shutting me out, making me feel less important to you. My brother he doesn't speak well of the relationship, or how far we have come. So that is the angle Xhosa is coming from.

I am a realist, there is norm and there is reality as well, lets be sincere with ourselves is not every problem or challenge we can share not because their is no love buh sharing some might even compound it. i will give some instance;
i av a friend that love his gurlfriend, buh he had a fling n impregnated another lady ... now these guy was having a hard time trying to convince d gurl to abort, thru those period he wasnt really himself so much the gurlfriend noticed.... will you have advice he shared such problem, is that not a personal shit.
there is a yoruba adage that say " its not all cloth we spread under the sun. communication is norm just as sun drying clothes

bdchange:

You have a strong point when you said there are moments we want to be alone and have our time to ourselves. But when you are in a relationship especially committed one not just randy bf or gf stuff, you owed it to your partner to communicate with each other any issues that you may be facing. You have to be open to each other and see how you can help each other when issues arises. But when you don't communicate with me during the time you are on distress, shutting me out, making me feel less important to you My brother he doesn't speak well of the relationship, or how far we have come. So that is the angle Xhosa is coming from.

Exactly! That's all there is to it. You can't treat people like they don't matter & expect them to be nice to you when you decide to make a guest appearance. In other words, it comes across like you think you're more important, your presence more valuable & so forth. Erm no...you aren't!

Michool60:
My boyfriend hasn't called me for a week now and I went to his place this week Monday to ask him what the matter was but he didn't give me any valid reply.I even called him that same day when I got home but he didn't pick up and didn't call back.I even message him the following day when I didn't see his call that if there is anything bugging him or if he wants to break up,that he should let me know instead of keeping me in the dark.He replied by saying "is alright and good day"I don't know what to do again because we didn't have any issue and he hasn't called nor text me up still now

Calm down, he'd come around...dont kill yourself

Michool60:
My boyfriend hasn't called me for a week now and I went to his place this week Monday to ask him what the matter was but he didn't give me any valid reply.I even called him that same day when I got home but he didn't pick up and didn't call back.I even message him the following day when I didn't see his call that if there is anything bugging him or if he wants to break up,that he should let me know instead of keeping me in the dark.He replied by saying "is alright and good day"I don't know what to do again because we didn't have any issue and he hasn't called nor text me up still now

You better face your future

E bi like say man never break your heart before

proclinician:
This is just a reaction to a whole huge action.

What went wrong?

Were you cheating on him and he can't take it anymore? If this is the case kindly let him be

Or eating deep into his meagre finances with bills for human hair, embellishments, clothes, outings, data, food, school, house rent while you are of zero value to him and he can't continue to be sinking because he's dating you? If this is the case understand he needs to be useful to himself and his family. The money for your hair can help his lil bro offset some bills so let him be.

Are u the type with numerous besties in endless preposterous frolicking while you rub it on his face there's nothing going on? If this is the case you need to understand that no man likes to raise another man's child. It's catastrophic.

Did you tell him no sex till marriage and he couldn't continue? Did he just plainly got tired? Well here's the big one. Sex could be very important.

Answer these questions to yourself and move on.

Lol @the assumptions.

there are a thousand and one reasons why people decide they don’t want to continue, the most important thing here is transparency and communication. He has a duty to communicate to her that he doesn’t want anymore or needs a break, but many people in Nigeria are not built for transparency and honesty, they would rather get into ghost mode and expect the other person to understand.

Edyice:
Just wait and see where is behaviour is going , if he said he's not doing again , just smile because men still dey queue

Re u one of the men we.y still dey queue? Just asking

ericsmith:





I am a realist, there is norm and there is reality as well, lets be sincere with ourselves is not every problem or challenge we can share not because their is no love buh sharing some might even compound it. i will give some instance;
i av a friend that love his gurlfriend, buh he had a fling n impregnated another lady ... now these guy was having a hard time trying to convince d gurl to abort, thru those period he wasnt really himself so much the gurlfriend noticed.... will you have advice he shared such problem, is that not a personal shit.
there is a yoruba adage that say " its not all cloth we spread under the sun. communication is norm just as sun drying clothes

That he has the guts to impregnate another lady and doesn't want to tell the gf shows he is a deceitful person which means the relationship is not healthy in the first place and never loved the girlfriend. Please advise that your friend to save the innocent girl by telling her so she can decide if she wants to remain in that relationship or not. Don't dish out what you won't tolerate. Will the guy accept what he is dishing out..a fling u called it

Michool60:
My boyfriend hasn't called me for a week now and I went to his place this week Monday to ask him what the matter was but he didn't give me any valid reply.I even called him that same day when I got home but he didn't pick up and didn't call back.I even message him the following day when I didn't see his call that if there is anything bugging him or if he wants to break up,that he should let me know instead of keeping me in the dark.He replied by saying "is alright and good day"I don't know what to do again because we didn't have any issue and he hasn't called nor text me up still now

1)Are you sure your BF hasn’t seen what he’s not supposed to see/hear about you?
Like gone through your chats or something finding out bad things you may/may not be doing and he’s just keeping it to himself.
Probably wanting to cut communication so the relationship dies naturally, in this case, he mostly would avoid some conversation with you Unlike before


2)He might just be needing his personal space due to stuff he’s going through, if you call him and he still picks up 80-90% of the time & you both talk normal.
Might be this


3) Bobo is prolly tired of the relationship, if you’re giving too much and he’s not even reciprocating, picking your calls or any. Then you should ask to talk and let him tell you if he’s done.
Value yourself

In this case, It’s sudden! I feel he saw/heard something about you

XhosaNostra:


If you're going through some shìt, then tell her that. Don't just disappear & expect her to be understanding. That's BS. She's not a mind reader.
There're moments where I fall off the face of the Earth, myself. Quite often, in fact. Because I need some me-time or whatever. But I will never do that to someone I'm in a relationship with because I'm not an A-hole Whichever way you like to spin it, this is unbecoming behaviour & me personally, I treat people how they treat me. Better to be single than be in a relationship with a selfish person that only thinks about themselves because I'll flip the script & give them a taste of their own medicine. Never test Nostra's waters if you're not an expert swimmer because I'll drown you!

God go punish that man/men wey do you like this my lady....put your hands on your head and say after me : My father, my father...in this year 2020 make me less bitter and remove bad relationship experiences from my heart....cleanse me from my toxic feminity and arrogance..make me truly happy again,because lord i know pride has not gotten me any where and that is why i aint got a man...thank you lord.

czarr:
God go punish that man/men wey do you like this my lady....put your hands on your head and say after me : My father, my father...in this year 2020 make me less bitter and remove bad relationship experiences from my heart....cleanse me from my toxic feminity and arrogance..make me truly happy again,because lord i know pride has not gotten me any where and that is why i aint got a man...thank you lord.

Oga, believe whatever you want.

bdchange:

That he has the guts to impregnate another lady and doesn't want to tell the gf shows he is a deceitful person which means the relationship is not healthy in the first place and never loved the girlfriend. Please advise that your friend to save the innocent girl by telling her so she can decide if she wants to remain in that relationship or not. Don't dish out what you won't tolerate. Will the guy accept what he is dishing out..a fling u called it

LOL ! @times i find it hard to believe people on social media live in the same world as me humans cant just segregate love from sex ... i guess abramham ddnt love sarah if he did like i claimed for 90yr he won't av accepted to sleep with the maid sarah brought for him.
abramham tried to sacrifice isaac perhaps he didnt love him like a father that waited 90yrs should. what you 4get is, that you love someone doesnt rule out you might do sumtin that wil hurt them its part of human imperfections.
There is no need advicing my friend confess anything the problem as been fixed and evrytin is back to normal. i don't know what you meant by healthy r/ship buh what yu meant is "perfect' my sista their is no perfect r/ship once in a yle distractions wil come, handle It in the best way n push it off ur path.

Give him a breathing space, he might have some issues that he is currently dealing with and may wish not to share it with anyone.

Leave him for atleast two months, if he fails to communicate thereafter, the guy has moved on.

On the other hand, search your heart deeply, you must have done something which the guy may not have that confidence to confront you.

I am now your new boyfriend

Nmezor:
Re u one of the men we.y still dey queue? Just asking

Yes dear .... No TIME

Edyice:




Yes dear .... No TIME

oh I see

Nmezor:
oh I see

Are you game , let me send you pm

Move on already. Life's too fun to be dulling and killing yourself over one nincompoop.
Bone him!

Maybe his friends has bad-mouthed you.

Michool60:
My boyfriend hasn't called me for a week now and I went to his place this week Monday to ask him what the matter was but he didn't give me any valid reply.I even called him that same day when I got home but he didn't pick up and didn't call back.I even message him the following day when I didn't see his call that if there is anything bugging him or if he wants to break up,that he should let me know instead of keeping me in the dark.He replied by saying "is alright and good day"I don't know what to do again because we didn't have any issue and he hasn't called nor text me up still now

Give him space and keep your options open. I have the feeling he wants out but doesn't know how to tell you.

XhosaNostra:
He's playing games. Probably has somebody else, but doesn't wanna directly end things with you, in case he needs you as a backup plan in the future. End things, to shut down that window of opportunity for him & if he dares try to test your temperature later on, FÙCKING SCALD HIM. Muahahaha. That's how you deal with confused A-holes.

Madam nor be fight naw. U go wicked oh.

Michool60:
My boyfriend hasn't called me for a week now and I went to his place this week Monday to ask him what the matter was but he didn't give me any valid reply.I even called him that same day when I got home but he didn't pick up and didn't call back.I even message him the following day when I didn't see his call that if there is anything bugging him or if he wants to break up,that he should let me know instead of keeping me in the dark.He replied by saying "is alright and good day"I don't know what to do again because we didn't have any issue and he hasn't called nor text me up still now

Make sure you always got d trump card. Do not beg, never beg... Translates to weakness. Offcourse some men wanna see you beg to assure them of your loyalty and love though but do u wanna b made to feel less?

I remember a nairalander who pushed his gf outside on a rainy day and the love struck homeless girl stuck to his door like a cat crying and begging, and he later allowed her in and them married her... Offcourse she's his puppet till end cos he conquered her very existence.. Very pathetic.

samguru:
Give him a breathing space, he might have some issues that he is currently dealing with and may wish not to share it with anyone.

Leave him for atleast two months, if he fails to communicate thereafter, the guy has moved on.

On the other hand, search your heart deeply, you must have done something which the guy may not have that confidence to confront you.

Is it a sin to open up to another when faced with issues? You communicate with them and give them closure.

wizdomnzube:
Madam nor be fight naw. U go wicked oh.

XhosaNostra:

I hear say southy babes dey do proper buh u just dey do lyk who dey born for warri

I wish more guys can be like this.

SweetCunt97:
Is it a sin to open up to another when faced with issues? You communicate with them and give them closure.

Not everyone likes sharing their problems for the fear of being mocked or chastised.

Let her give that breathing space as earlier prescribed,when the guy is in the right frame of mind,he will surely look for a way to reconnect.

wizdomnzube:
I hear say southy babes dey do proper buh u just dey do lyk who dey born for warri

Hmmmm...I'm not sure how to take that lol.

XhosaNostra:


Hmmmm...I'm not sure how to take that lol.

Take am with pride. I dey try clear u say u na no nonsense chick. Nor reason am go left

samguru:


Not everyone likes sharing there problems for the fear of being mocked or chastised.

Let her give that breathing space as earlier prescribed,when the guy is in the right frame of mind,he will surely look for a way to reconnect.

OK

ericsmith:





LOL ! @times i find it hard to believe people on social media live in the same world as me humans cant just segregate love from sex ... i guess abramham ddnt love sarah if he did like i claimed for 90yr he won't av accepted to sleep with the maid sarah brought for him.
abramham tried to sacrifice isaac perhaps he didnt love him like a father that waited 90yrs should. what you 4get is, that you love someone doesnt rule out you might do sumtin that wil hurt them its part of human imperfections.
There is no need advicing my friend confess anything the problem as been fixed and evrytin is back to normal. i don't know what you meant by healthy r/ship buh what yu meant is "perfect' my sista their is no perfect r/ship once in a yle distractions wil come, handle It in the best way n push it off ur path.

I disagree with your statement of loving somebody then doing something that will hurt them. Abraham's case is different because he was told to do it by the person he loved. For using the bible to try to justify loving someone and yet hurting them because you are imperfect, this is what it says...1 Corinthians 13:4-8 New International Version (NIV)
4 Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. 5 It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. 6 Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. 7 It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.

8 Love never fails. But where there are prophecies, they will cease; where there are tongues, they will be stilled; where there is knowledge, it will pass away. This is what love is truly is, anything short of this means you never loved the person. Either you liked the person so much or u are in lust, but it is never love.