₦airaland Forum

mrbenjame:
Then how old is Ned?

mu2sa2:
If you have nothing to do must you come and do it here?

1StopRudeness:
U are even taking my post serious by asking me how old is Ned.....I don’t know...I don’t even know Dangote or Atiku’s age....me I’m just joking around

mu2sa2:
Only the ignorant will come after you. I have seen a video clip of a debate with a christian priest where the other man asked him to quote anywhere in the bible which unequivocally states that christians should marry only one wife. The priest couldn't. Can anybody help out here without "long grammar", just chapter & verse?

tete7000:
You talk of Isaiah 4:1. That verse prophesies a doom for daughters of Zion for abandoning God and sinning. It Is actually the continuation of Isaiah 3 and cannot be read in isolation. I will help you, from Isaiah 3 we read,

The Lord says, “The women of Zion are haughty, walking along with outstretched necks, flirting with their eyes, strutting along with swaying hips, with ornaments jingling on their ankles. Therefore the Lord will bring sores on the heads of the women of Zion; the Lord will make their scalps bald.” In that day the Lord will snatch away their finery: the bangles and headbands and crescent necklaces, the headdresses and anklets and sashes, the perfume bottles and charms, Instead of fragrance there will be a stench; instead of a sash, a rope; instead of well-dressed hair, baldness; instead of fine clothing, sackcloth; instead of beauty, branding. Your men will fall by the sword, your warriors in battle. The gates of Zion will lament and mourn; destitute, she will sit on the ground.
Isaiah 3:16‭-‬18‭, ‬20‭, ‬24‭-‬26

This continues in Isaiah 4 thus, remember the men have fallen by swords in 3 so they are in short supply:

In that day seven women will take hold of one man and say, “We will eat our own food and provide our own clothes; only let us be called by your name. Take away our disgrace!”
Isaiah 4:1 NIV
https://isaiah.bible/isaiah-4-1

gaskiyamagana:
Good. Take it or leave it, our women in Nigeria today are committing same sins that is why they are plenty for us to engage in polygamy by marrying dem Legally instead of ADULTERY and FORNICATION.

murmee:
So why did God make a (ONE) suitable companion for Adams and not TWO or more? (Genesis 2 verse 18)

Acmepreneur:
Ode, keep on deceiving yourself, there's everything wrong with polygamy and its Because of stupid fools like you that think its mindset making some polygamy not peaceful.
The problem is jealousy, envy and natural human/African wickedness. I know people that are not marrying the same husband, yet out of jealousy one would destroy one. They are mere friends o, because her friend pass more than her, she turned her to enemy and destroyed her. 90% of human beings is like this, and that's why polygamy is a battle field, because its natural with the children of Adam. Go to federal government offices, and see how people do bad things to one another out of hate, spite, and jealousy. Especially in Federal universities and polytechnics, is it mindset that made these people to harm each other? Some professors do not even want PhD students to earn their PhD degree, likewise many supervisors without any prior offences.
Keep on deceiving yourself ehn, and enter into polygamy, you will hate your existence.
Its better to remain single and unmarried than to be in a polygamy, because its synonymous to heart attack. In this age that everyone is trying to grow, you will be arguing in stupid thing with a stupid fool abi. .
I'm in support of polygamy for some special cases though but personally I won't advise anyone because it's a death sentence

barnny:
Apart from mindset, polygamous family has its side effects. You forgot to tell us the negative effects on your part except you want to tell me there's none which i will find it hard to concur.
Before you will want to quote me, let me categorically tell u that I'm from a polygamous family too. There are some issues i can't even tell the closest person to me because of the fear of the unknown.

DexterousOne:
Did you know WHY polygamy was the ideal thb back in the day?


Like I mentioned before

1) Labour was the gold back in the day. The more children you have, the more manpower you had at your disposal (and soldiers when your village gets raided, as this was rampant back in the day)
Unfortunately one woman cannot give you that, because one woman cannot bear 30 kids back to back
So you need more wives to give you more kids.

2)our forefathers were not sex driven but sensible providers and defenders of their family.
Character and fertility of the woman was what was looked at.....
Sex appeal (big ass big brezz) was at the back burner, and most importantly our forefathers were not slaves to their penis.

Many women then will not get a second look by most men today.


Why polygamy wont work large scale today


1) Most of the men seeking polygamy today are slaves to their penis and are lust driven
This combination beclouds ones judgement and picking multiple wives in the basis of this is disastrous

2) we are In a tech driven world with less emphasis on labour
In this economic order, many dependents at the base of the population pyramid is not the best way to go.
Many kids in this era is NOT Ideal.

And other reasons sha


Now can polygamy work?

Maybe

Is it for me?

Lai lai

Can a lust driven man run a successful polygamous home?

That's a disaster


Can polygamy breed jealousy and bad blood?

Absolutely !
Especially if the first wife was married to you when things were so bad, then you then make it
Then you think it's a good idea to add two bimbo wives after your first wife is burnt out (we know this is often the case in Nigeria)

From that day going forward
There would be no peace

But if you married them all when you were well to do, and you were honest with the first wife from day one that you will have additions, the frictions will be reduced

The variables are so many

NextD18:
One of the Advantages I know is that; The nagging and bad-mannerisms will be lesser as there will be competition between the wives to impress you with good characters and doings.


This is only if you are RICH!

Michelle55:
Not worth it... Just stick to one because one woman is enough problem already,why are you trying to die young by having massive heartaches?

PS: and if you must become polygamous, make it 3 instead of 2... Because when those two will gang up against you, the 3rd will snitch on them to become your top priority and favorite heard this secret from one baddest grandpa in my area

phemmyflexxy:
As a wife/mother
Does your faith/belief allow you to? If yes, you have a better option than committing fornication or being a side chick/public property.
Do you have a source of sustainance and can cater for your kids? If yes, go ahead and save yourself from depression and societal pressure, if no marry a wealthy man.
Do you have the emotional intelligence to deal with your fellow women as mates/rivals? If yes, you have an helper and save yourself a lot of burden, plus your children have spare mother's like me. If no, pls leave those who can to live in peace.

RisenPhoenix:
There is a huge advantage to polygamy, but only if a man is mature and emotionally balanced; and is able and willing to take care of all his wives. Only then can the following benefits be reaped...
For women:

1. It helps take care of women in society. If everybody who is able to do so marries many women, there will not be any single women running wild, lining up for 'special prayer', competing for husbands and becoming baby mamas. Even widows and divorcees will find husbands (if they have good characters).

this is a lie. If every man marries 10 wives each until all women of marriageable age are married it will not address all the problems of these women. Getting married addresses the need for love and belongingness but it does not necessarily help a lady have a meaningful life. In a Buharic economy having a wife is easily a project and having more than 1 wife is easily a nightmare. How will you cater for the women equally? How will you satisfy all the women sexually? Some men have just 1 wife and it is a battle satisfying her sexually let alone a man with more than 1 wife. Dude be not deceived GOD was not stupid to make 1 Eve for 1 Adam.

2. It promotes harmony in the house; the strength and maturity of the man is key.
Hear yourself. Inquire from those who are the product of polygamy, you will find a common thread of jealousy, conspiracy, vendetta, acrimony and fatal strife...you can be mature all you want, a woman capacity to bring out the beast in you in unparalleled and soon enough you might have to see a voodoo practitioner to give you charms to control your wives

3. Women have more peace of mind. They know who their 'rivals' are, and if they suppress their innate desire for troublemaking, can even make friends.

Women have peace of mind? Really? You legally marry a lady who would have spent a couple of years being a side chick and the more the number increases the more the older wives keep expecting the next conversion of the next side chick into a wife...even newer wives will also join the bandwagon...there is no peace of mind anywhere for a woman in a polygamous relationship. Let the man drop dead, and high blood pressure will start as the wives start playing the politics of how to share your possessions

4. Women rest more. The burden of running the homes is lighter when shared by more than one woman. When one wife does not feel like cooking, or having sex etc, the other(s) can step up. Child caring etc can also be rotated.

Women rest more? What happened to recruiting a house help to assist. There are times none of the wives will do anything in the house as each wife is waiting on the other to do the needful...and each wife knows that when shit comes down it will come down on all the wives so this emboldens her to do as she likes

For men:

1. They have more peace at home. A woman should never feel she is the only sugar in her man's tea because she will inevitably misbehave.

Really? Is it not misbehavior for a man to keep search for another wife even after having one? Isn't the man saying his first wife is not enough, so he has the get the second? Isn't that misbehaviour? What would make such a man stop at a specified number of wives? He can go on and on till he has hundreds of wives because he real reason for marrying new wives is his insatiable, unbridled and uncontrollable lust which is itself a misbehavior which women are not allowed to exhibit.

2. He need not have extra marital affairs with all its attendant problems. Anytime he meets a woman that he likes, he either marries her or keeps his hands off. Having an assortment of women in the house will make him not even want to look outside (remember I made his maturity a condition from the beginning).

Well yes, he needs not have extra marital affairs because the ladies he would have had extra marital affairs with have become his wives...dude a mature man will control his lust and manage his resources with one wife. Only a fool will claim to be mature and yet goes on a sex spree with several women in the name of polygamy...and what makes the man have an upper limit on the number of wives? Nothing! He can go on and on and on having new wives and divorcing older ones until he would have had sex with the number of women needed to populate a nation!

Women don't like it only because it takes away their power to dominate their husband.
Only a weakling fool is scared of a powerful wife. That is why in societies where polygamy is the norm their women are often beaten and goaded into submission. Women in such societies hardly submit willingly but are forced into submission but a true alpha male will get the submission of a woman without even saying a word...those are real men and not the weaklings who cringe when a powerful woman shows up.


Weak men don't like it only because women say it is not good and they want to look like nice men to those women.
So by implication a strong man is someone who specializes in doing what women say is not good. A strong man in your opinion is someone is far from being a nice man but chooses to be a nightmare, right? Interesting. You just defined a tyrant and probably most polygamous men are tyrants but as tyrannical as they are their wives have a way of cutting them to size and sharing the fools property

NextD18:
One of the Advantages I know is that; The nagging and bad-mannerisms will be lesser as there will be competition between the wives to impress you with good characters and doings.


This is only if you are RICH!

Hathor5:
In your attempt to romanticize the idea of a polygamous marriage, you have not forgotten to mention that the wives are rivals at the end of the day. I would much rather be single than have my husband sleep around on the same compound. This, my dear, would certainly make me depressed, not being single, which has more advantages than polygamy in my own view. If you can't stand the idea of your wife sleeping with other men, then you have an idea why many ladies react negatively to sharing their husband.

murmee:
So why did God make a (ONE) suitable companion for Adams and not TWO or more? (Genesis 2 verse 18)

phemmyflexxy:
Can you tell me why God made the population of women grow more than that of men

barnny:
So God did that so men can marry more than one abi

phemmyflexxy:
Your guess is as good as mine...

MrBrownJay1:
no i dont think so.... to each their own misery. i would rather a man marry multiple wives and be faithful than marry just one and cheating on her with multiple women. the problem here is:
A) many women enter these polygamous r/ships not as a desire, but simply because thats the only option they have... and thus become bitter miserable women in these union... while some women desire to be in such r/ship from the get go and become wonderful concubines/co-wives etc

B) yes there isa serious problem with marriages in Nigeria/Africa, but i doubt it has anything to do with polygamy. polygamy has been here since the begining of time, and there wasnt any problem with it before, why suddenly blame polygamy?

C) IMHO the main problem here is SOCIETY...
- it is society that pushes women to believe that they must get married at any cost, even if they are not ready/willing.
- it is society that looks down on unmarried women.
- its society that looks down on successful women, so long as they aint married.
- its society that believes that men can have multiple wives but looks down on women wanting to have multiple husbands.
- its society that believes that its ok for a +60yr old man to marry a 18yr old.
- its society that looks up to money so much that some people are willing to even marry a donkey, so long as it has money.