| Re: Are There Advantages In Marrying More Than One Wife? by Nobody: 8:17am On Apr 05, 2020 |
mrbenjame:
Then how old is Ned? U are even taking my post serious by asking me how old is Ned.....I don’t know...I don’t even know Dangote or Atiku’s age....me I’m just joking around |
| Re: Are There Advantages In Marrying More Than One Wife? by 0m0nnakoda: 8:30am On Apr 05, 2020 |
mu2sa2:
If you have nothing to do must you come and do it here? Is that not why you are here? |
| Re: Are There Advantages In Marrying More Than One Wife? by mrbenjame: 8:50am On Apr 05, 2020 |
1StopRudeness:
U are even taking my post serious by asking me how old is Ned.....I don’t know...I don’t even know Dangote or Atiku’s age....me I’m just joking around Lols. No wahala. I got you. |
| Re: Are There Advantages In Marrying More Than One Wife? by murmee: 9:11am On Apr 05, 2020 |
mu2sa2:
Only the ignorant will come after you. I have seen a video clip of a debate with a christian priest where the other man asked him to quote anywhere in the bible which unequivocally states that christians should marry only one wife. The priest couldn't. Can anybody help out here without "long grammar", just chapter & verse? So why did God make a (ONE) suitable companion for Adams and not TWO or more? (Genesis 2 verse 18) |
| Re: Are There Advantages In Marrying More Than One Wife? by gaskiyamagana: 9:24am On Apr 05, 2020 |
tete7000:
You talk of Isaiah 4:1. That verse prophesies a doom for daughters of Zion for abandoning God and sinning. It Is actually the continuation of Isaiah 3 and cannot be read in isolation. I will help you, from Isaiah 3 we read,
The Lord says, “The women of Zion are haughty, walking along with outstretched necks, flirting with their eyes, strutting along with swaying hips, with ornaments jingling on their ankles. Therefore the Lord will bring sores on the heads of the women of Zion; the Lord will make their scalps bald.” In that day the Lord will snatch away their finery: the bangles and headbands and crescent necklaces, the headdresses and anklets and sashes, the perfume bottles and charms, Instead of fragrance there will be a stench; instead of a sash, a rope; instead of well-dressed hair, baldness; instead of fine clothing, sackcloth; instead of beauty, branding. Your men will fall by the sword, your warriors in battle. The gates of Zion will lament and mourn; destitute, she will sit on the ground.
Isaiah 3:16-18, 20, 24-26
This continues in Isaiah 4 thus, remember the men have fallen by swords in 3 so they are in short supply:
In that day seven women will take hold of one man and say, “We will eat our own food and provide our own clothes; only let us be called by your name. Take away our disgrace!”
Isaiah 4:1 NIV
https://isaiah.bible/isaiah-4-1 Good. Take it or leave it, our women in Nigeria today are committing same sins that is why they are plenty for us to engage in polygamy by marrying dem Legally instead of ADULTERY and FORNICATION. |
| Re: Are There Advantages In Marrying More Than One Wife? by tete7000(m): 9:27am On Apr 05, 2020 |
gaskiyamagana:
Good. Take it or leave it, our women in Nigeria today are committing same sins that is why they are plenty for us to engage in polygamy by marrying dem Legally instead of ADULTERY and FORNICATION. And many of you will fall into swords like their men did so as to leave room for that to happen. Your sins will catch up with you. Read the entire chapter 3 to understand the fate that befell the men of zion |
| Re: Are There Advantages In Marrying More Than One Wife? by mu2sa2: 10:44am On Apr 05, 2020 |
murmee:
So why did God make a (ONE) suitable companion for Adams and not TWO or more? (Genesis 2 verse 18) Answering a question with a question! Just beating about the bush.The simple question was, mention anywhere in the bible that prohibits marrying 2 wives. 1 Like |
| Re: Are There Advantages In Marrying More Than One Wife? by phemmyflexxy(m): 11:27am On Apr 05, 2020 |
Acmepreneur:
Ode, keep on deceiving yourself, there's everything wrong with polygamy and its Because of stupid fools like you that think its mindset making some polygamy not peaceful.
The problem is jealousy, envy and natural human/African wickedness. I know people that are not marrying the same husband, yet out of jealousy one would destroy one. They are mere friends o, because her friend pass more than her, she turned her to enemy and destroyed her. 90% of human beings is like this, and that's why polygamy is a battle field, because its natural with the children of Adam. Go to federal government offices, and see how people do bad things to one another out of hate, spite, and jealousy. Especially in Federal universities and polytechnics, is it mindset that made these people to harm each other? Some professors do not even want PhD students to earn their PhD degree, likewise many supervisors without any prior offences.
Keep on deceiving yourself ehn, and enter into polygamy, you will hate your existence.
Its better to remain single and unmarried than to be in a polygamy, because its synonymous to heart attack. In this age that everyone is trying to grow, you will be arguing in stupid thing with a stupid fool abi. .
I'm in support of polygamy for some special cases though but personally I won't advise anyone because it's a death sentence you just proved my point that the problem is not polygamy but some people's nature... You can insult all you want, I guess that's your nature too... My opinion is mine and yours is yours... Peace out |
| Re: Are There Advantages In Marrying More Than One Wife? by phemmyflexxy(m): 11:54am On Apr 05, 2020 |
barnny:
Apart from mindset, polygamous family has its side effects. You forgot to tell us the negative effects on your part except you want to tell me there's none which i will find it hard to concur.
Before you will want to quote me, let me categorically tell u that I'm from a polygamous family too. There are some issues i can't even tell the closest person to me because of the fear of the unknown. Well, the topic asks for benefits... If you read my post well, I actually said "not without challenges"... Let me mention a few... Sometimes the competition might become unhealthy and trivial things could turn into a full blown war. But this happens in monogamy. When children fight, mothers take side and take over the fight... When one party (among the wives) is fond off making messes without cleaning it up... When any or all of the wives consults alfas, pastors, etc. The common tale they are told is the cause of their problem is their rival which most times is untrue... This also happen in monogamy e.g. a wife could be told the reason for her husband change in character because a side chick has jazzed him... All this challenges does not exist in every polygamy. I actually consider my own family to be among the few good ones. This also takes God's grace and the head of the house maturity and discipline. Yes we fight once in a while which is inevitable but we make up and move on and even go extra mile to show each other love as a sign of leaving the past behind. Peace doesn't happen by accident, people work for it... That is what I use to tell my step mum when ever she reports my mum to me.. I can't say more 1 Like |
| Re: Are There Advantages In Marrying More Than One Wife? by holocron: 12:30pm On Apr 05, 2020 |
DexterousOne:
Did you know WHY polygamy was the ideal thb back in the day?
Like I mentioned before
1) Labour was the gold back in the day. The more children you have, the more manpower you had at your disposal (and soldiers when your village gets raided, as this was rampant back in the day)
Unfortunately one woman cannot give you that, because one woman cannot bear 30 kids back to back
So you need more wives to give you more kids.
2)our forefathers were not sex driven but sensible providers and defenders of their family.
Character and fertility of the woman was what was looked at.....
Sex appeal (big ass big brezz) was at the back burner, and most importantly our forefathers were not slaves to their penis.
Many women then will not get a second look by most men today.
Why polygamy wont work large scale today
1) Most of the men seeking polygamy today are slaves to their penis and are lust driven
This combination beclouds ones judgement and picking multiple wives in the basis of this is disastrous
2) we are In a tech driven world with less emphasis on labour
In this economic order, many dependents at the base of the population pyramid is not the best way to go.
Many kids in this era is NOT Ideal.
And other reasons sha
Now can polygamy work?
Maybe
Is it for me?
Lai lai
Can a lust driven man run a successful polygamous home?
That's a disaster
Can polygamy breed jealousy and bad blood?
Absolutely !
Especially if the first wife was married to you when things were so bad, then you then make it
Then you think it's a good idea to add two bimbo wives after your first wife is burnt out (we know this is often the case in Nigeria)
From that day going forward
There would be no peace
But if you married them all when you were well to do, and you were honest with the first wife from day one that you will have additions, the frictions will be reduced
The variables are so many
Your analysis appears good when examined in a cursory way. The economic conditions in the time of our forefathers is not too different from where we find ourselves today. Those men were men of steel who built a supporting culture that kept men and women in check to behave for the overall good of their society. The fact that polygamy is now difficult to operate is due to the fact that this culture is now damaged if not irredeemably destroyed. All the problems generated by polygamy can be summarised as the jealousy of women as they scheme to sabotage the institution to maximise their personal gains. And this were easily accommodated and neutralised by certain cultural practices which has now been abandoned. For instance, Our polygamous ancestors did not dwell in the same house as the women. Each woman has her own house/kitchen, and the patriarch maintained his own quarters independent of them. The culture also retained several practices to checkmate the machinations of the women. On things you say are obsolete: 1) Labour: the need for labor is still not outdated as you say. Manual illiterate labour, yes. We are in dire need of skilled, technical, and professional labour. We don't have enough of this that's why we are economically backward. 2) population: we are not out of the woods yet in terms of unsustainable low population. Southern Nigeria is depopulating very fast. Average birth rate now is 3 or less per woman, with many women having none due to delayed marriages in pursuit of education and work and the stigma of child birth outside marriage. Africa is currently underpopulated as a continent, and the negro race is the least populated race in the world. Even, Indians alone are greater in population than all the blacks in the whole world. We need the population to drive economic development (In economics, a formidable youth bulge is a primary driver of economic development). Wars and other martial conflict are still not outdated, we need the population to prosecute these. What do you think facilitates the present Fulani expansion down south? You guessed it, their youth bulge - a large youthful energetic population. And they will prevail if their adversaries do not have the population to defend their turf and combat the marauders. |
| Re: Are There Advantages In Marrying More Than One Wife? by efficiencie(m): 12:45pm On Apr 05, 2020 |
NextD18:
One of the Advantages I know is that; The nagging and bad-mannerisms will be lesser as there will be competition between the wives to impress you with good characters and doings.
This is only if you are RICH! ...if you are rich and you do not have side chicks in addition to the two...whatever made you have 2 wives will likely make you have a side chick and if the insidious 2 find out they will be competing to kill you and have access to your wealth... 1 Like |
| Re: Are There Advantages In Marrying More Than One Wife? by efficiencie(m): 12:49pm On Apr 05, 2020 |
Michelle55:
Not worth it... Just stick to one because one woman is enough problem already,why are you trying to die young by having massive heartaches?
PS: and if you must become polygamous, make it 3 instead of 2... Because when those two will gang up against you, the 3rd will snitch on them to become your top priority and favorite  heard this secret from one baddest grandpa in my area  ...and who told you that the same factors that can make 2 wives collude will not make 3 wives collude...I can tell you one such factor. If you like have 1000 wives, provided there is a side chick you are eying you are in deep shit...all the 1000 wives will realize they are just options and women hate being options...they will connive to make barbecue out of you and split your wealth! In addition, if at least 2 wives are powerhouses then you are in deeper shit they will collude to wipe out non-cooperating wives and take over whatever you have! |
| Re: Are There Advantages In Marrying More Than One Wife? by Hathor5(f): 1:01pm On Apr 05, 2020 |
phemmyflexxy:
As a wife/mother
Does your faith/belief allow you to? If yes, you have a better option than committing fornication or being a side chick/public property.
Do you have a source of sustainance and can cater for your kids? If yes, go ahead and save yourself from depression and societal pressure, if no marry a wealthy man.
Do you have the emotional intelligence to deal with your fellow women as mates/rivals? If yes, you have an helper and save yourself a lot of burden, plus your children have spare mother's like me. If no, pls leave those who can to live in peace.
In your attempt to romanticize the idea of a polygamous marriage, you have not forgotten to mention that the wives are rivals at the end of the day. I would much rather be single than have my husband sleep around on the same compound. This, my dear, would certainly make me depressed, not being single, which has more advantages than polygamy in my own view. If you can't stand the idea of your wife sleeping with other men, then you have an idea why many ladies react negatively to sharing their husband. |
| Re: Are There Advantages In Marrying More Than One Wife? by efficiencie(m): 1:26pm On Apr 05, 2020 |
RisenPhoenix:
There is a huge advantage to polygamy, but only if a man is mature and emotionally balanced; and is able and willing to take care of all his wives. Only then can the following benefits be reaped...
For women:
1. It helps take care of women in society. If everybody who is able to do so marries many women, there will not be any single women running wild, lining up for 'special prayer', competing for husbands and becoming baby mamas. Even widows and divorcees will find husbands (if they have good characters).
this is a lie. If every man marries 10 wives each until all women of marriageable age are married it will not address all the problems of these women. Getting married addresses the need for love and belongingness but it does not necessarily help a lady have a meaningful life. In a Buharic economy having a wife is easily a project and having more than 1 wife is easily a nightmare. How will you cater for the women equally? How will you satisfy all the women sexually? Some men have just 1 wife and it is a battle satisfying her sexually let alone a man with more than 1 wife. Dude be not deceived GOD was not stupid to make 1 Eve for 1 Adam.
2. It promotes harmony in the house; the strength and maturity of the man is key.
Hear yourself. Inquire from those who are the product of polygamy, you will find a common thread of jealousy, conspiracy, vendetta, acrimony and fatal strife...you can be mature all you want, a woman capacity to bring out the beast in you in unparalleled and soon enough you might have to see a voodoo practitioner to give you charms to control your wives
3. Women have more peace of mind. They know who their 'rivals' are, and if they suppress their innate desire for troublemaking, can even make friends.
Women have peace of mind? Really? You legally marry a lady who would have spent a couple of years being a side chick and the more the number increases the more the older wives keep expecting the next conversion of the next side chick into a wife...even newer wives will also join the bandwagon...there is no peace of mind anywhere for a woman in a polygamous relationship. Let the man drop dead, and high blood pressure will start as the wives start playing the politics of how to share your possessions
4. Women rest more. The burden of running the homes is lighter when shared by more than one woman. When one wife does not feel like cooking, or having sex etc, the other(s) can step up. Child caring etc can also be rotated.
Women rest more? What happened to recruiting a house help to assist. There are times none of the wives will do anything in the house as each wife is waiting on the other to do the needful...and each wife knows that when shit comes down it will come down on all the wives so this emboldens her to do as she likes
For men:
1. They have more peace at home. A woman should never feel she is the only sugar in her man's tea because she will inevitably misbehave.
Really? Is it not misbehavior for a man to keep search for another wife even after having one? Isn't the man saying his first wife is not enough, so he has the get the second? Isn't that misbehaviour? What would make such a man stop at a specified number of wives? He can go on and on till he has hundreds of wives because he real reason for marrying new wives is his insatiable, unbridled and uncontrollable lust which is itself a misbehavior which women are not allowed to exhibit.
2. He need not have extra marital affairs with all its attendant problems. Anytime he meets a woman that he likes, he either marries her or keeps his hands off. Having an assortment of women in the house will make him not even want to look outside (remember I made his maturity a condition from the beginning).
Well yes, he needs not have extra marital affairs because the ladies he would have had extra marital affairs with have become his wives...dude a mature man will control his lust and manage his resources with one wife. Only a fool will claim to be mature and yet goes on a sex spree with several women in the name of polygamy...and what makes the man have an upper limit on the number of wives? Nothing! He can go on and on and on having new wives and divorcing older ones until he would have had sex with the number of women needed to populate a nation!
Women don't like it only because it takes away their power to dominate their husband.
Only a weakling fool is scared of a powerful wife. That is why in societies where polygamy is the norm their women are often beaten and goaded into submission. Women in such societies hardly submit willingly but are forced into submission but a true alpha male will get the submission of a woman without even saying a word...those are real men and not the weaklings who cringe when a powerful woman shows up.
Weak men don't like it only because women say it is not good and they want to look like nice men to those women.
So by implication a strong man is someone who specializes in doing what women say is not good. A strong man in your opinion is someone is far from being a nice man but chooses to be a nightmare, right? Interesting. You just defined a tyrant and probably most polygamous men are tyrants but as tyrannical as they are their wives have a way of cutting them to size and sharing the fools property
1 Like |
| Re: Are There Advantages In Marrying More Than One Wife? by imustsaymymindo: 3:13pm On Apr 05, 2020 |
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| Re: Are There Advantages In Marrying More Than One Wife? by Bigblessed: 3:38pm On Apr 05, 2020 |
Good one only that the competition, which involves both healthy and unhealthy ones emanates from diverse ramifications such as physical, spiritual, economical, educational, emotional, biological, cultural, metabolical, logical, legal, etc. Ability to withstand all these, is what gives you the name with which you come out of it. NextD18:
One of the Advantages I know is that; The nagging and bad-mannerisms will be lesser as there will be competition between the wives to impress you with good characters and doings.
This is only if you are RICH! |
| Re: Are There Advantages In Marrying More Than One Wife? by Hussein01(m): 7:43pm On Apr 05, 2020 |
Polygamy is not bad in itself, the problem lies in the kind of people who engage in it.
I have seen people of polygamous home that have happy home.
I think its success lies not only with the financial status and the ability of a man to manage a large family but also to deal with justice within his wives.
Writing from the Islamic point of view, polygamy is a way to curb marital infidelity. in a situation in which a man has higher sexual capacity than that which her spouse could contain, he his at liberty to engage in polygamy sofar he has the financial capacity etc. to cater for a large family. he can go on and on but not exceeding four.
Secondly, a social phenomenon which a society can never do without is divorce which the higher percentage of it being initiated by a man while women are at the receiving end. those women divorced will never -atleast 90% of them- be married by a single man who is marrying for the first time. so, it is through polygamy that those divorcee -that still care- would have someone to call there husband.
It is prophesied that there will come a time the woman population will surpass that of their male conterpart resulting in unavailability of husband making the concept of one-man-one-wife utopian. and since legitimate sexual enjoyment and procreation come only from marriage, polygamy comes as a solution. |
| Re: Are There Advantages In Marrying More Than One Wife? by phemmyflexxy(m): 8:04pm On Apr 05, 2020 |
Hathor5:
In your attempt to romanticize the idea of a polygamous marriage, you have not forgotten to mention that the wives are rivals at the end of the day. I would much rather be single than have my husband sleep around on the same compound. This, my dear, would certainly make me depressed, not being single, which has more advantages than polygamy in my own view. If you can't stand the idea of your wife sleeping with other men, then you have an idea why many ladies react negatively to sharing their husband. The quest for dominance is the beginning of rivalry, once you grow above that, you wouldn't be so bittered or depressed about sharing your man.... I have friends who dread polygamy but engage in 3some and date married men... How funny... |
| Re: Are There Advantages In Marrying More Than One Wife? by phemmyflexxy(m): 8:57pm On Apr 05, 2020 |
murmee:
So why did God make a (ONE) suitable companion for Adams and not TWO or more? (Genesis 2 verse 18) Can you tell me why God made the population of women grow more than that of men  |
| Re: Are There Advantages In Marrying More Than One Wife? by barnny(m): 9:51pm On Apr 05, 2020 |
phemmyflexxy:
Can you tell me why God made the population of women grow more than that of men So God did that so men can marry more than one abi |
| Re: Are There Advantages In Marrying More Than One Wife? by phemmyflexxy(m): 9:55pm On Apr 05, 2020 |
barnny:
So God did that so men can marry more than one abi Your guess is as good as mine... |
| Re: Are There Advantages In Marrying More Than One Wife? by barnny(m): 10:50pm On Apr 05, 2020 |
phemmyflexxy:
Your guess is as good as mine... Hmmm well done God's mind reader |
| Re: Are There Advantages In Marrying More Than One Wife? by mikolo80: 4:13am On Apr 06, 2020 |
Biology not society MrBrownJay1:
no i dont think so.... to each their own misery. i would rather a man marry multiple wives and be faithful than marry just one and cheating on her with multiple women. the problem here is:
A) many women enter these polygamous r/ships not as a desire, but simply because thats the only option they have... and thus become bitter miserable women in these union... while some women desire to be in such r/ship from the get go and become wonderful concubines/co-wives etc
B) yes there isa serious problem with marriages in Nigeria/Africa, but i doubt it has anything to do with polygamy. polygamy has been here since the begining of time, and there wasnt any problem with it before, why suddenly blame polygamy?
C) IMHO the main problem here is SOCIETY...
- it is society that pushes women to believe that they must get married at any cost, even if they are not ready/willing.
- it is society that looks down on unmarried women.
- its society that looks down on successful women, so long as they aint married.
- its society that believes that men can have multiple wives but looks down on women wanting to have multiple husbands.
- its society that believes that its ok for a +60yr old man to marry a 18yr old.
- its society that looks up to money so much that some people are willing to even marry a donkey, so long as it has money. |
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