₦airaland Forum

Hi guys. Please I need advice.

There is this guy in my department. Let's call him Joe. He is good looking and very intelligent. He also has this very nice voice and good vocabulary. Initially we were just normal casual classmates, we greet, exchange notes and all that, nothing serious. I've always found him attractive but have not found him special in any way because I've met lots of guys like him in my University.

But few months ago he started becoming more friendly towards me. We got talking and we realized we shared a lot in common. He asked me if I was single and I told him I was. This was the truth because I wasn't dating anyone then.

Few days after another guy I was very close to asked me to be his girlfriend and I agreed. I'm in love with this guy. He is very jovial, intelligent and he knows how to treat me well. I know he loves me because I've known him for a while and he has treated me with love, affection and respect. It's always fun being around him and I enjoy his company.

Despite now being in a relationship, I still continued spending time with Joe. We shared a lot of deep intimate info about ourselves with each other. I have never felt more comfortable talking to someone before. Talking to him always made me feel good. I felt I could be vulnerable with him. He was very honest and didn't hide the dark aspects of himself. He wasn't the type to pretend he was a good person. And he wasn't. He had done a lot of bad things in the past and he wasn't afraid to talk to me about them. And although this might sound weird I liked the fact that he wasn't the typical "moral individual" I was used to meeting. I liked the fact that he had a dark personality that only me knew about. He said things to me that made me begin to explore myself and my sexuality in ways I didn't even imagine that I could. He was always fond of teasing me and never hesitated to correct me if I did anything wrong. I loved that kind of honesty.

As we talked more Joe opened up to me that he was attracted to me and had feelings for me. He would flirt with me and I'd try my best not to flirt back but I enjoyed his flirting and I enjoyed his company. He asked me if I felt the same way about him and I was honest and I said I had feelings for him, because I did. He is an attractive guy and even though I have a boyfriend I can't help being attracted to him..

He then asked me to be his girlfriend and I told him I was already dating someone. He was surprised by my response. He told me he was under the impression that I was single and that's why he had gotten so close and intimate with me. But he didn't appear angry or sad. He even told me my bf was lucky to have me.

The problem now is that since that day he hasn't talked to me. When I see him in class, he doesn't even act like I exist. He doesn't reply my messages, doesn't pick up my calls and doesn't check up on me. Throughout this lockdown he hasn't even texted me once. This is unlike him. I feel very bad about the whole thing. It's almost like our relationship didn't mean anything to him and I didn't mean anything to him. I want to still be friends with him.

Buy 7 candles, when it is 12AM, light it all. Call out his name 21 times, do these while fasting for 20days. He will talk to you.

Use the both guys to your advantage


Keep joe guy for assignments and handout test and other class stuff



While use the new guy for your finances phones,clothes,eateries wigs


And please stay in school hostle that way non of them can bother you with sex cause they can't gain access to girls hostel and you ever visit any of them reduce your sexual conversation with joe guy and learn to keep your phone private.....Hope it helps

You broke his heart... He has no reason to continue the friendship... Having you in his life is like having a chicken, the chicken he was suppose to eat and now somebody else has eaten it....

Abeg. one yeah the guy was only interested in you to date you so there is your answer
two- lets be honest, you were using this guy as your backup/spare tire in case bf doesnt work. I mean, you guys joking about exploring your sexuality? abeg- not platonic.
Lets be honest with ourselves here

He did the right thing
Life goes on you already said you can’t date him
So do you still want to be around him wasting his time
Meanwile you Have already told him that you have a boyfriend the way he will chat with you or hangout with you wil reduce
Life Goes on

For wanting to friendzone that innocent but smart dude, you probably won't make heaven.

The young man knows what he wants. Most male friends only but wait for an opportunity to get their female friend laid. The young man is simply not a waiter, life isn't a restaurant to him because if it was he could have "chop and gone". He has moved on and will succeed in life.

He sees through your indecision and myopia. I wouldn't blame you because it is not uncommon with girls your age.

[

J111333:
For wanting to friendzone that innocent but smart dude, you probably won't make heaven.

Thank you

Ah! Let’s unpack this!

You have a boyfriend/in a relationship (who you clearly said has been treating you right) that’s not enough ,

You have another guy who is a “friend” according to you but you find him attractive and have deep intimate conversations with.

You told the second guy about your boyfriend and bad man japa, now this is where it gets really interesting! So it bothered you that much that the new guy isn’t talking to you again that you had to open a thread on NL ( all these while having a whole boyfriend).


You even have the nerve to want to friend zone the other guy lol (couldn’t be me tho)

You know you’re cheating right

Millenniumlady:
Use the both guys to your advantage


Keep joe guy for assignments and handout test and other class stuff



While use the new guy for your finances phones,clothes,eateries wigs


And please stay in school hostle that way non of them can bother you with sex cause they can't gain access to girls hostel and you ever visit any of them reduce your sexual conversation with joe guy and learn to keep your phone private.....Hope it helps

mama de mama!!!!!

Joe messed up by not smashing you earlier and leaving

Awon ti confused human being

The season ends once a winner claims the trophy. Joe is trying to heal so give him space.

John is the "love me or leave me" personality.
No be quarrel just let him be

Aunty suzzi23

You went to summit your CV in a company and they didn't take you ... Will you go their again?

You literally broke his heart in to tiny shards.. I swear to God, it's usually painful.. Right now what do you want? Do you wanna be with joe or your other boyfriend?
You know you love joe so don't deny it

You, self.. Wetin you dey find? You don sign contract with Chelsea, you wan cum Dey do training with Manu.

You had better face your contract.



PS: And although this might sound weird I liked the fact that he wasn't the typical "moral individual" I was used to meeting. I liked the fact that he had a dark personality that only me knew about.

No, it’s not weird. Girls loves bad boys. Nah reality.

Lol, I had similar experience with a girl like that recently, almost like ur story except the fact that I don't have any dark experience. After she told me she has a boyfriend, that was the last time we ever spoke or chatted since this lockdown. Me don japa already for her matter

happened to me bck in school, gal had to confront me and ask why I stop caring bout am I tell am say no need of me flocking around other people's babe say me too wan my own babe

Suzzi23 shey ur name get Tola? Because I don get three similar experiences with girls wey there name get Tola for inside

i like this joe dude.he is a wise dude.he cut off from u as soon as he knew u were dating someone.thats what a reasonable man does.u should also cut off from him and quit bothering him.no be by force to do bestie .

othermen:
Buy 7 candles, when it is 12AM, light it all. Call out his name 21 times, do these while fasting for 20days. He will talk to you.

lefulefu:
i like this joe dude.he is a wise dude.he cut off from u as soon as he knew u were dating someone.thats what a reasonable man does.u should also cut off from him and quit bothering him.no be by force to do bestie .

Lol, he must do bestie

Eberechi24:
Lol, he must do bestie

not every guy dey cut out for bestie

Girls like OP will be very easy to have sex with!!

If Joe had waited a little bit longer, He will definitely Kpansh this OP, But I guess He isn't a bad guy, Cos According to this write-up, OP likes Joe already!

I was once in Joe's shoes too, She also told me She has a boyfriend, But by the look of things, I sensed she's still kinda into me

Las Las I Yansh the girl, Upon say she get Boyfriend ooo!!

lefulefu:
not every guy dey cut out for bestie

True sha. The guy no want to be friend zoned, the lady should understand that. I don't know what you all have against male bestie.

What is it? Tell me, wanna know

Eberechi24:
True sha. The guy no want to be friend zoned, the lady should understand that. I don't know what you all have against male bestie.

What is it? Tell me, wanna know

male bestie is the same thing as fukmate or wat u call friend of benefit

Eberechi24:
True sha. The guy no want to be friend zoned, the lady should understand that. I don't know what you all have against male bestie.

What is it? Tell me, wanna know

i prefer friends with benefits no emotional attachment e dey sweet pass bestie, who bestie help.

This is why I hate my girl having a bestie....bestie my foot...if her friend is not female then fvck it ...

Back to the post, the guy did the right thing now....so just let him be...