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How My Mom Ruined My Life by Agba2020(m): 6:43pm On Jun 29, 2020 |
I've only told this to one person and I've been carrying this one for 9 years now. This might turn out to be a little long, so bear with me. When I was 17, a few days to my first WAEC, I was reading in the living room when my mom walked in and falsely accused me of sleeping with my own Dad... Oh, I'm a guy btw. I'm not gay, neither am I effeminate. She claimed she saw my Dad touching me and that he slept with me. I was stunned. I went through different ranges of emotions. At first, I wanted to curse her, then I wanted the ground to swallow me up for real, then I wanted to cry, and then I wanted to scream, tears just filled my eyes, and the first thing that came out of my mouth was "Why are you doing this?" and then she just walked out. I just sat there losing my mind, I knew it was untrue because there's no way you would penetrate a guy without him feeling it, right? Not to mention the fact that I have no memory of this ever happening. And yet she claimed she saw this happening, if that was true, why didn't she stop it? Long story short, that was the day my life got turned upside down by my own Mom. The not so funny thing is, she never once brought up that issue again since then, and yet she never apologized for it (not that I'd ever forgive her anyway). Dad has no clue about this issue, by the way. 30 Likes 11 Shares |
Re: How My Mom Ruined My Life by Janeberryy: 6:49pm On Jun 29, 2020 |
How did it ruin your life? Or it ruined your relationship with her? Don't tell me that affected your whole life, like affected your sexuality or your success? 200 Likes 5 Shares |
Re: How My Mom Ruined My Life by SweetCunt97(f): 6:52pm On Jun 29, 2020 |
She probably got possessed by her village people. 89 Likes 5 Shares |
Re: How My Mom Ruined My Life by heendrix(m): 6:53pm On Jun 29, 2020 |
Indomie build up so she accused you wrongly and ever since then your life spoilt? let it continue spoiling na. mtcheww sha keep us updated to the monthly level to which it's spoiling 320 Likes 14 Shares |
Re: How My Mom Ruined My Life by FlordFlorez(m): 7:02pm On Jun 29, 2020 |
Chai...what did i just read. True, many are mad but few are roaming about. 67 Likes 4 Shares |
Re: How My Mom Ruined My Life by Kylekent59: 7:10pm On Jun 29, 2020 |
She loves you so much, more reason she poured out her anger by uttering such words. 1 Like |
Re: How My Mom Ruined My Life by sisisioge: 7:19pm On Jun 29, 2020 |
Wow! There are several forrked up people roaming the street! Who says this to a teenage boy in Nigeria bikonu! Double abomination! A regular naija guy is homophobic and incest is a big deal here! Whew! I'm so sorry...matter just tire 30 Likes 2 Shares |
Re: How My Mom Ruined My Life by seankafor(m): 7:27pm On Jun 29, 2020 |
Lol, I can't stop laughing.. shit is so funny I can't imagine my own mum telling me this.. I'll personally ask her if she has gone nuts? Well this is life..things(shits) happen 20 Likes 1 Share |
Re: How My Mom Ruined My Life by Baloranking(m): 8:21pm On Jun 29, 2020 |
Post traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) Get your mom the help she needs before it's too late. 43 Likes 1 Share
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Re: How My Mom Ruined My Life by frozen70(f): 9:41pm On Jun 29, 2020 |
Agba2020: If you want to forget about it, pls do and be happy If you think you can't forget about it and she still does worst thing, report to dad and let it be settled But left for me, forget it and forgive her We forgive others not because they deserve to be forgiven but because you need peace of mind 27 Likes 2 Shares |
Re: How My Mom Ruined My Life by Ningen(m): 10:14pm On Jun 29, 2020 |
Yap. Emotional abuse ruin people. But you've to be mentally strong to survive. Pick yourself up man. Move on or the world will pass you by. 11 Likes |
Re: How My Mom Ruined My Life by Agba2020(m): 12:45am On Jun 30, 2020 |
heendrix:Eeyah sorry o, mommy's boy. It's quite obvious you know not the kind of weight that words carry, especially when those words come from the person that's supposed to be your shield from the world. I hope ur children never have to go through the kind of mental anguish i've had to go through. Be well. 106 Likes 7 Shares |
Re: How My Mom Ruined My Life by Agba2020(m): 12:55am On Jun 30, 2020 |
Janeberryy:Maybe "ruined my life" was a bit of an exagerration, that was mostly so people would check out the thread. It definitely ruined my relationship with not only her, but my Dad as well, because since she said what she said i just couldn't stand the sight of my own Dad anymore. There was a time not long after the accusation when he was talking to me and Dad tried touching me on my arm and i just freaked out, i almost jumped away. It might sound funny, but it really wasn't funny to him, he was just shocked and confused as hell, but i couldn't tell him coz i thought it would only destroy the family, so i just shouldered the burden. It didn't affect my sexuality, but it held me back academically and in life. I was isolated because i had no one to talk to. 69 Likes 5 Shares |
Re: How My Mom Ruined My Life by Agba2020(m): 1:09am On Jun 30, 2020 |
frozen70:I didn't report to Dad back then for a few. The first reason being that i was afraid that Dad would throw her out or worse... my Dad has a temper. Secondly, i thought to myself "What if i report this and then she totally denies it?" I mean let's be honest, in Nigeria, when it comes to parents, we tend to put them on pedestals... they can do no wrong. Anyway, those were the reasons why i kept it to myself, but it still haunts me every single day. Oh, and i can't bring it up with them now because they are getting old and that kind of heavy shit could potentially make a person's heart give out. 34 Likes 2 Shares |
Re: How My Mom Ruined My Life by Agba2020(m): 1:25am On Jun 30, 2020 |
Ningen:I appreciate your comment bro and while i do agree that moving on is the best course of action, it is really hard, extremely so. It's going on 10yrs now, and i still can't get it out of my head, and i'm tempted to just spill it out and maybe see if i might get unburdened. But it's like having a house with many doors, and there's that one door that you cannot dare open, because if you open it, one of two things could happen, things could somehow miraculously or magically get better (highly unlikely) or you could make things infinitely worse. And there's one thing i learned early in life, it's that no matter how bad things are, it could always get worse, much worse. Anyway, peace brother. 13 Likes 2 Shares |
Re: How My Mom Ruined My Life by IfGodbeforus(m): 1:57am On Jun 30, 2020 |
There are certain things people say to us that could be so awkward and so bad. Atimes it could be a false accusation. A very painful one. When things like this happen, it hurts us so much. The Truth is that unforgivness hurts the one who bares the grudges . Unforgiveness injures the one who refuses to let go. For us to be free we Just need to let go. It's not gonna be easy to let go! But we need to let it go. The Greatest way to let it go , is for you to cast all your burdens on JESUS CHRIST. Ask Him to Heal you, forgive u and set you free. Once that is done, you will Mysteriously see a whole new you. 22 Likes 4 Shares |
Re: How My Mom Ruined My Life by Doglove91: 2:05am On Jun 30, 2020 |
Ehyaa 1 Like |
Re: How My Mom Ruined My Life by Janeberryy: 6:36am On Jun 30, 2020 |
Agba2020: Now I understand better. I'm sure you way older now. I hope you have let it go or fix something. If you were to tell your mum she might not remember again. Bury the hatchet and move on. 3 Likes |
Re: How My Mom Ruined My Life by yvelchstores(f): 7:47am On Jun 30, 2020 |
I think you should Talk to your mother about this. Tell her how this affects you, and if she can, she should confirm her claims. You don't move on from family, in such a sensitive matter as this. So inorder for you to be free, let her remember that day and tell you if it really happened, and if not, what pushed her to say what she said. Parents should be held accountable for their actions and words. 33 Likes 2 Shares |
Re: How My Mom Ruined My Life by frozen70(f): 8:03am On Jun 30, 2020 |
Agba2020: Your points are very valid Just learn to forget and forgive her Keeping it up till this time hurts you more Worst is that she might have forgotten everything about it So why nurse still nursing it and bearing more pains She is your biological mum Move everything behind pls and stop hurting yourself The more you store people's provocations in your heart, the heavier it will be for you to carry The next thing is frustration and depression 5 Likes |
Re: How My Mom Ruined My Life by DeeMain(m): 10:09am On Jun 30, 2020 |
One 1 hour therapy session by a competent therapist could heal this memory completely. Why allow this ruin your life and relationships till now? Why allow your mum's weakness or error or mistake to determine your present and your future? You are now an adult. Take responsibility and heal this issue now. Take charge. 14 Likes 2 Shares |
Re: How My Mom Ruined My Life by Nobody: 10:35am On Jun 30, 2020 |
Am not sure u are from Nigeria. |
Re: How My Mom Ruined My Life by Hypnotise: 11:38am On Jun 30, 2020 |
Op. Just forget about it. Sometimes mothers say some pretty hurtful stuffs. 5 Likes 1 Share |
Re: How My Mom Ruined My Life by merieam16(f): 1:38pm On Jun 30, 2020 |
Agba2020:Guess u re d only child |
Re: How My Mom Ruined My Life by bukatyne(f): 1:48pm On Jun 30, 2020 |
rawitools: Why? |
Re: How My Mom Ruined My Life by Agba2020(m): 3:33pm On Jun 30, 2020 |
merieam16:There are three of us and I'm the last born. 1 Like |
Re: How My Mom Ruined My Life by Agba2020(m): 3:35pm On Jun 30, 2020 |
rawitools:I am. Born and bred. Why aren't you sure I'm from Nigeria, if you don't mind me asking. 3 Likes |
Re: How My Mom Ruined My Life by Agba2020(m): 3:36pm On Jun 30, 2020 |
DeeMain:Hmm, this is good advice. 8 Likes |
Re: How My Mom Ruined My Life by Agba2020(m): 3:38pm On Jun 30, 2020 |
IfGodbeforus:I appreciate your input, thanks. 4 Likes 2 Shares |
Re: How My Mom Ruined My Life by Nobody: 3:45pm On Jun 30, 2020 |
Agba2020:baba you would have giving her hot hot outrightly. That’s how Naija men behave. 3 Likes |
Re: How My Mom Ruined My Life by merieam16(f): 3:59pm On Jun 30, 2020 |
Agba2020:talk 2 u siblings abt it den or just 4get abt it Truth b told, dez a lot of weird nd nasty tins our parents talk nd accuse us for. If we keep holdin on 2 tinz dey say or dey av said we wont move forward 1 Like |
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