Good morning NL
I'm a 26 years old graduate dating a 22 years old undergraduate.

I have been dating my girlfriend now for 3 years plus now, for most of the 3 years she was very passionate, loving and caring, the best girlfriend any guy could as for. As a matter of fact I have planned us spending our life together.

Until 2 months ago in May, when we had a fight, not the 1st fight we ever had. We have hard even more serious fights in the past, so as usual I expected the fight to be over and forgotten within 24 hours or at most 48 hours like we used to do.

Unfortunately the fight lingered longer than usual, I demanded for a break after that she also demanded for a break too. We settled everything and continued but since then she is just off, as if she is fed up of the relationship, we still talk on phone, she just left my place less than 2 weeks ago but the relationship doesn't feel like I used to.

Recently I have been noticing this guy she always chats long chats with and I asked her about it we had an argument that day, afterwards she said she would end her connection with the guy, only for her to come to my house this last time and I saw her chat and she was still very much chatting and flirting with the same person, I asked her about it and she lied straight to my face that she was no longer in contact with the guy, I forced her until she opened up to still chatting with him but that there is nothing between them. We also had other discussion she clearly lied about. And to be honest, this lying of a thing is a new development, because she has always been an honest girlfriend. But now I noticed we have lapses in our communication, I sometimes call she doesn't pick, then she would call back giving me excuses, she will be online but won't chat me up(which is highly unlike her), I would chat her up and her reply would be delayed. I have been putting up with all this hoping this episode will pass and all will return back to normal.

Then out of the blues, we had no fight, no quarrel or argument she calls me and asked me what will I do if she demands for a break up right now? I was surprised I told her I would be angry but I will grant her, her wish if I realized she was serious. Then she told me she no long knew what she felt for me anymore, that she doesn't understand her feeling towards the relationship, then she demanded for a time off. I got angry as this was coming out of the blues, I told her that if she want to leave she should leave and if she wants to stay she should stay that I'm not giving her a time off because there was clearly no reason for that. And to my surprise she opted to leave the relationship, I was surprised and angry I agreed to her request, only for her to call me the next day apologising and telling me she doesn't know what has come over her (Mind you she broke my heart for those hours because it all happened unprovoked).

Now my friends are advising me not to let her back that she could do a more hurtful thing in the future that her head is no longer in the relationship but I feel I should give her another chance for old times sake at least. But at the same time I don't want to be hurt again, now I notice me gradually pulling out of the relationship, I hardly believe her, the whole episode has made me to start suspecting her.

So NL help please, reasonable advises please.

Typing ....

To be frank with you OP, your relatiinship has hit a rock. What's happening now is reflection of the past days being together, result of aggregation of different crevices. Even if the both of you manage to put the differences behind and get back together, the truth is the wheel of the relationship is squeaky already and no amount of lubricants can make it run smoothly again, not like you had it during those good old days.

I suspect that all that happened are all your faults, she may have her own faults too. When you say you always have to settle scores every now and then, little fights in relationship is not unusual but what initiates them determines what will later happen in the future. Do you nag too much? Do you always yell at any slightest provocation? If you find out you are the one who is always saying sorry, that doesn't mean you hate seeing your partner getting angry, it means you always offend her. If by chance your gf is a cool and calm type but you always take advantage of this, time will come she'll decide everything has to stop, she won't have the power to endure you anymore , she'll start loosing interest in the relationship and that may become the end of the beginning .

My kindid advice, you need to be sure if the relationship would still work, take her back and give it a final shot, do all you could to make sure everything comes back to normal. You are mature and you'll know by yourself if the boat of the relationship won't be affected by any waves or turbulence again, by then you should be able to know if it is healthy to stay or you should just jump off.

You can give her a second chance to break your heart again, the girl you just discrib has already left you, I think you have her but she don't have you, the game now it's you been the backup guy in case the other guy dissapear,she doesn't want to lose at both ends.
You can give her the chance but do not put your all again, just play along or it will end in tears n you will still come to tell us here.
Stay safe n use your head.

You want to give her another chance and you don't want to be hurt again.

Dangote trailer with cement load cant mend ur heart after she finishes with you...mumu man continue twentysomething year you are focusing on love..no b curse oh but bross u go suffer if you no sit up face life with the realities....mumu girls go delay you destroy you....if u like no wake up hustle...d girl dey do you like Dis bkos u are simply broke oga man up oh

Oga, you're land has been acquired. Jump and pass

Person wey u suppose turn to fuckdoll, u rather fell in love

Men don’t fall in love now

You better donate your heart to hustling and let your dick do the loving....

You need some street OT....

In every relationship, a man must never complain about petty things like “you’re not calling or reading my text”

Change the game and let her do that shit...

Thank me later

she's carried away,reserve some respect for yourself and let her go, never force yourself to be in anyone's life man or woman,it does not always end well.Nairaland boys will call your type a simp lol

If you no longer trust her simply let her be/go.


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The Girl Might Be Testing U

I think both of you need to end this thing you call relationship now. End it completely and look for other people or just be single for awhile and figure out what you both need in a relationship before going into one again.

I have been single for two years now and my oh my I enjoy myself

Uhmmmm

Niqqa, what you still there for? She ain't got the fort to tell you that she wants out, you gats get the hell out before it becomes more toxic than it already is...

She wants to eat her cake and still have it.

She's passing through the ho.e phase. She's also not your wife. Na ordinary gf so no carry the matter put for head too much. The mistake you are making is that you cant expect a 22 year old girl to think she has found a husband, not to talk of know what being faithful really means. She's not telling you everything. As time goes on she will be more secretive, she will do more than just chat but you will never find out as she has seen that you can't handle it. Don't deceive yourself. She's growing. She will meet bigger men than you that can provide what you cant provide for her. You are even a student meaning most of what you can offer her are sweet words. Guys with cars and money will come and I bet you she will spread legs for them.

You demanded a break over little quarrel and that, my friend, is the Leviticus of your problem.

The Genesis of the problem was the incessant unnecessary fight you had which created room for the niggar. The break you demanded then gave room for him to come in fully.

Now, the book of Matthew of your problem will be when they finally meet in za ozza room if they haven't already and that, my friend, will usher in the final book of Revelation.

The truth of this situation is that you are headed to girlfriendless status but give it a fight, there may still be chances of recovery.

Happy 4th of July to you my friend. Cheers

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Op you've a very weird relationship. nagging in a relationship is a possible dissolution waiting for its date and that's what played out in your relationship



your gf started acting weird to you because her feelings was hijacked by the said guy she had been charting with, should I burst your brain? the guy must have succeeded in getting down with her and thrash her out hence her coming back to you. such lady is not fit to go into a relationship with because her loyalty cannot be trusted


what's the meaning of loyalty if there is no trust. there are millions of single ladies all over the country looking for bf, find and get one.

Please move on..

I hope you don't want to see yourself as the extra tyre..


She wants to explore but still want to hold on to you

If you know you have self worth please jejely break it off with her and look for a stable minded working class chick. Most of these undergraduate girls ain't mentally stable.. They are greedy

Lol this has been my problem with guys



His eyes are so opened, yet he can't see


This one will come back to nl next three months and start saying women are trash


You better use your brain

My advice: approach any girl with big boobs and ass, sleep with her for two days, then you'll forget this girl, because clearly, you are just stuck because of the sex she's giving you

WAKE UP she's a HOE

guys do not flow with hoes, guys use them

Nigeria youth, 26 and 22.

Is this what we should be bordering our head about.

Young man, pls make ur self useful....

Dont ever be the sensible one in a relationship makes you come off as possessive. Takes 2 to be in a relationship. Your choice for me I let her go,its turning toxic and dont wait for something worse. How can you date a girl who is available to other guys and lies to your face. She doesnt see you again as anything.And Hey what are you doing dating a girl for 3yrs more like you both are sleeping together and figuring things to work out. Whats the plans? Focus and get established and stop feeling entitled to have a girlfriend and when your ready get married. So your that cheap a partner can walk out and walk in and your seen as pitiable. Sorry bro

Lol � � � � �

The only advice I could give you right now is to move on, its gonna be hard to let go but you really need your sanity and peace of mind back to concentrate on greater things ahead.
Don't give anyone room to take your commitments and trust for granted, you deserve better. Your gf is already gone, you are more like a backup plan now (that is, if it doesn't work out with the current dude in her life) she might just fall back to you.
Kindly move on young man and channel your attention into becoming a better man than you were yesterday..
I Trust you is far much better and satisfying than I Love you
Once you don't trust your partner anymore, the relationship is gone! Love alone can't sustain anything

Hmm

Op! Start withdrawing the love u av for her bit by bit cause she has already stopped loving you. I made this same mistake u made in the past and it didn't end well.

Lemme tell you something I've realized in relationship.

No relationship ends in one day, NEVER! one party must av fallen out of love since(dis is where the relationship ends) but jst scared or dnt jst want to end it by demself.

just imagine the way the other guy go de lash am... oga your girl don chop better thing, even if you guys settled again and continue the relationship, she can't afford to miss that stake in the middle of that of the other guy, guy Guy may carry better cassava...

From my little and sad experience, once it involves another guy, and she lies about this person.. it’s over! I’m 100% sure of this. She will set a trap for you and leave with a reason.