₦airaland Forum

Heartbrokengirl:
I have always hated the idea of dating married people, but here I am...the ex-girlfriend of a married man.

It started sometime during the lockdown, I went somewhere to get groceries and ran into this man. Let’s call him Mr X. His smile and sense of humour was the attraction. He was putting on a nice senator material and when I stood for us to leave, he towered above me. I am a 6ft tall lady and ladies with my height can tell the happiness when you meet a taller man.

We started chatting regularly and we were in a competition to give ourselves treats. On our second date which I initiated, I asked his age and he replied 36, he asked mine and I told him. He expressed his doubts and I showed him my drivers license. Started asking many questions about my background and I answered all of them. I asked about him too, including his marital status.

I had just gotten out of a relationship, his father said he wouldn’t marry outside the Catholic church and he started drifting, I had to let him go. It was tough for me, but after months of keeping to myself, my friend encouraged me to go on dates and give another man a chance. I decided to give Mr X a chance.

It was beautiful. We were in a competition to please ourselves, take ourselves out and we both had a healthy sense of humour...chatting was fun!!! Everywhere we went, people stared. We were all over ourselves even in public and till date I wonder how he pulled that off.

One day his office had a party and he asked if I could come, I said yes. Got there and the guys were looking at me with lust, the ladies were looking at me with pity. He said the ladies were jealous of my looks and some of them have been crushing on him. If you see him and see me, you’ll understand why this explanation made little sense.

After the party that day, it was late to go back to my house and his house was farther, so we decided to book a hotel around. That night was our most intimate night. We kissed, he gave me leg massages, a head and said he is ready when I am ready. I was blown away. Could this be real?

I always noticed he would be lost in thoughts whenever we are together and blame it on work. Other times he will start feeling sick and I would have to close earlier to go give him food and drugs. This became a regular occurence until one day…

He had fallen sick as usual. I made him promise to take pain relievers and we should consider going to the hospital. He didn’t do this and I had to make out time within the week to go check on him. He said it is because he was missing me, how sweet!

He didn’t get better, it was obvious something was bothering him. I decided I will take him for lunch so we can talk about it, but he couldn’t wait. That night he said he has something to tell me, he kept apologizing but still couldn’t say it. He asked if he could send a voice note and I told him to go ahead.

At about 3mins into the voice note, I felt my world crumbling. He told me he was married and has been married for almost 10years with kids. His family was not in the country, that is why I never saw traces of them. He said he had been battling with the guilt and was scared to tell me because some other girl left when she found out and the last was with him for money. He knew I would leave and was scared, his best friend told him to give it time, another told him to ghost me but I have been good to him and his conscience won’t let him. Other friends said he should never mention it to me.


When my friend saw him, she told me he was going to hurt me. I asked her how and she said I was too innocent for him. She didn’t say further not to be termed hater, but since he made me happy again...she wished me well.

I kept replaying the audio while he kept asking me to say something. I wondered if he treated his wife the way he treated me. He was such a gentleman. Held my hands when I had to walk in heels, opened the car door for me, checked on me at work, gave me handmade customized gifts...he made them himself. He said his wife is bad and he wants divorce her, lolz. I told him they all say that. I told him how much he has hurt me, but I forgive him and appreciate him telling me when he did.

It has been almost 3months but the pain lingers. I know I will be fine…

Heartbrokengirl:
I have always hated the idea of dating married people, but here I am...the ex-girlfriend of a married man.

It started sometime during the lockdown, I went somewhere to get groceries and ran into this man. Let’s call him Mr X. His smile and sense of humour was the attraction. He was putting on a nice senator material and when I stood for us to leave, he towered above me. I am a 6ft tall lady and ladies with my height can tell the happiness when you meet a taller man.

We started chatting regularly and we were in a competition to give ourselves treats. On our second date which I initiated, I asked his age and he replied 36, he asked mine and I told him. He expressed his doubts and I showed him my drivers license. Started asking many questions about my background and I answered all of them. I asked about him too, including his marital status.

I had just gotten out of a relationship, his father said he wouldn’t marry outside the Catholic church and he started drifting, I had to let him go. It was tough for me, but after months of keeping to myself, my friend encouraged me to go on dates and give another man a chance. I decided to give Mr X a chance.

It was beautiful. We were in a competition to please ourselves, take ourselves out and we both had a healthy sense of humour...chatting was fun!!! Everywhere we went, people stared. We were all over ourselves even in public and till date I wonder how he pulled that off.

One day his office had a party and he asked if I could come, I said yes. Got there and the guys were looking at me with lust, the ladies were looking at me with pity. He said the ladies were jealous of my looks and some of them have been crushing on him. If you see him and see me, you’ll understand why this explanation made little sense.

After the party that day, it was late to go back to my house and his house was farther, so we decided to book a hotel around. That night was our most intimate night. We kissed, he gave me leg massages, a head and said he is ready when I am ready. I was blown away. Could this be real?

I always noticed he would be lost in thoughts whenever we are together and blame it on work. Other times he will start feeling sick and I would have to close earlier to go give him food and drugs. This became a regular occurence until one day…

He had fallen sick as usual. I made him promise to take pain relievers and we should consider going to the hospital. He didn’t do this and I had to make out time within the week to go check on him. He said it is because he was missing me, how sweet!

He didn’t get better, it was obvious something was bothering him. I decided I will take him for lunch so we can talk about it, but he couldn’t wait. That night he said he has something to tell me, he kept apologizing but still couldn’t say it. He asked if he could send a voice note and I told him to go ahead.

At about 3mins into the voice note, I felt my world crumbling. He told me he was married and has been married for almost 10years with kids. His family was not in the country, that is why I never saw traces of them. He said he had been battling with the guilt and was scared to tell me because some other girl left when she found out and the last was with him for money. He knew I would leave and was scared, his best friend told him to give it time, another told him to ghost me but I have been good to him and his conscience won’t let him. Other friends said he should never mention it to me.


When my friend saw him, she told me he was going to hurt me. I asked her how and she said I was too innocent for him. She didn’t say further not to be termed hater, but since he made me happy again...she wished me well.

I kept replaying the audio while he kept asking me to say something. I wondered if he treated his wife the way he treated me. He was such a gentleman. Held my hands when I had to walk in heels, opened the car door for me, checked on me at work, gave me handmade customized gifts...he made them himself. He said his wife is bad and he wants divorce her, lolz. I told him they all say that. I told him how much he has hurt me, but I forgive him and appreciate him telling me when he did.

It has been almost 3months but the pain lingers. I know I will be fine…

bukatyne:
25yrs to 36yrs?

Babes why?

A 36yr old guy (almost 40?) to your young self?

Maybe my bias speaking here.

Anyways, good you came out of it and Bobo is a gamer, forget all the years and apology.

He probably realized you would not give up sex soon that's why he jumped to the next person.

@family welcoming you: some families are legit useless and immoral. Or since they are Muslims, he told them he wants to marry you.

Ask your friends what they saw in him then you can pick the logical stuffs for further learning.

Good luck.

Heartbrokengirl:
I have always hated the idea of dating married people, but here I am...the ex-girlfriend of a married man.

It started sometime during the lockdown, I went somewhere to get groceries and ran into this man. Let’s call him Mr X. His smile and sense of humour was the attraction. He was putting on a nice senator material and when I stood for us to leave, he towered above me. I am a 6ft tall lady and ladies with my height can tell the happiness when you meet a taller man.

We started chatting regularly and we were in a competition to give ourselves treats. On our second date which I initiated, I asked his age and he replied 36, he asked mine and I told him. He expressed his doubts and I showed him my drivers license. Started asking many questions about my background and I answered all of them. I asked about him too, including his marital status.

I had just gotten out of a relationship, his father said he wouldn’t marry outside the Catholic church and he started drifting, I had to let him go. It was tough for me, but after months of keeping to myself, my friend encouraged me to go on dates and give another man a chance. I decided to give Mr X a chance.

It was beautiful. We were in a competition to please ourselves, take ourselves out and we both had a healthy sense of humour...chatting was fun!!! Everywhere we went, people stared. We were all over ourselves even in public and till date I wonder how he pulled that off.

One day his office had a party and he asked if I could come, I said yes. Got there and the guys were looking at me with lust, the ladies were looking at me with pity. He said the ladies were jealous of my looks and some of them have been crushing on him. If you see him and see me, you’ll understand why this explanation made little sense.

After the party that day, it was late to go back to my house and his house was farther, so we decided to book a hotel around. That night was our most intimate night. We kissed, he gave me leg massages, a head and said he is ready when I am ready. I was blown away. Could this be real?

I always noticed he would be lost in thoughts whenever we are together and blame it on work. Other times he will start feeling sick and I would have to close earlier to go give him food and drugs. This became a regular occurence until one day…

He had fallen sick as usual. I made him promise to take pain relievers and we should consider going to the hospital. He didn’t do this and I had to make out time within the week to go check on him. He said it is because he was missing me, how sweet!

He didn’t get better, it was obvious something was bothering him. I decided I will take him for lunch so we can talk about it, but he couldn’t wait. That night he said he has something to tell me, he kept apologizing but still couldn’t say it. He asked if he could send a voice note and I told him to go ahead.

At about 3mins into the voice note, I felt my world crumbling. He told me he was married and has been married for almost 10years with kids. His family was not in the country, that is why I never saw traces of them. He said he had been battling with the guilt and was scared to tell me because some other girl left when she found out and the last was with him for money. He knew I would leave and was scared, his best friend told him to give it time, another told him to ghost me but I have been good to him and his conscience won’t let him. Other friends said he should never mention it to me.


When my friend saw him, she told me he was going to hurt me. I asked her how and she said I was too innocent for him. She didn’t say further not to be termed hater, but since he made me happy again...she wished me well.

I kept replaying the audio while he kept asking me to say something. I wondered if he treated his wife the way he treated me. He was such a gentleman. Held my hands when I had to walk in heels, opened the car door for me, checked on me at work, gave me handmade customized gifts...he made them himself. He said his wife is bad and he wants divorce her, lolz. I told him they all say that. I told him how much he has hurt me, but I forgive him and appreciate him telling me when he did.

It has been almost 3months but the pain lingers. I know I will be fine…

Heartbrokengirl:
I have always hated the idea of dating married people, but here I am...the ex-girlfriend of a married man.

It started sometime during the lockdown, I went somewhere to get groceries and ran into this man. Let’s call him Mr X. His smile and sense of humour was the attraction. He was putting on a nice senator material and when I stood for us to leave, he towered above me. I am a 6ft tall lady and ladies with my height can tell the happiness when you meet a taller man.

We started chatting regularly and we were in a competition to give ourselves treats. On our second date which I initiated, I asked his age and he replied 36, he asked mine and I told him. He expressed his doubts and I showed him my drivers license. Started asking many questions about my background and I answered all of them. I asked about him too, including his marital status.

I had just gotten out of a relationship, his father said he wouldn’t marry outside the Catholic church and he started drifting, I had to let him go. It was tough for me, but after months of keeping to myself, my friend encouraged me to go on dates and give another man a chance. I decided to give Mr X a chance.

It was beautiful. We were in a competition to please ourselves, take ourselves out and we both had a healthy sense of humour...chatting was fun!!! Everywhere we went, people stared. We were all over ourselves even in public and till date I wonder how he pulled that off.

One day his office had a party and he asked if I could come, I said yes. Got there and the guys were looking at me with lust, the ladies were looking at me with pity. He said the ladies were jealous of my looks and some of them have been crushing on him. If you see him and see me, you’ll understand why this explanation made little sense.

After the party that day, it was late to go back to my house and his house was farther, so we decided to book a hotel around. That night was our most intimate night. We kissed, he gave me leg massages, a head and said he is ready when I am ready. I was blown away. Could this be real?

I always noticed he would be lost in thoughts whenever we are together and blame it on work. Other times he will start feeling sick and I would have to close earlier to go give him food and drugs. This became a regular occurence until one day…

He had fallen sick as usual. I made him promise to take pain relievers and we should consider going to the hospital. He didn’t do this and I had to make out time within the week to go check on him. He said it is because he was missing me, how sweet!

He didn’t get better, it was obvious something was bothering him. I decided I will take him for lunch so we can talk about it, but he couldn’t wait. That night he said he has something to tell me, he kept apologizing but still couldn’t say it. He asked if he could send a voice note and I told him to go ahead.

At about 3mins into the voice note, I felt my world crumbling. He told me he was married and has been married for almost 10years with kids. His family was not in the country, that is why I never saw traces of them. He said he had been battling with the guilt and was scared to tell me because some other girl left when she found out and the last was with him for money. He knew I would leave and was scared, his best friend told him to give it time, another told him to ghost me but I have been good to him and his conscience won’t let him. Other friends said he should never mention it to me.


When my friend saw him, she told me he was going to hurt me. I asked her how and she said I was too innocent for him. She didn’t say further not to be termed hater, but since he made me happy again...she wished me well.

Heartbrokengirl:
We never had penetrative sex, I have never had penetrative sex. The messages are from our past chat, I only cleared the chat after creating this thread. I have not set my eyes on him since then. He has called with other numbers, but that has been it.

Plz, you can reserve the “hoe” tag for your loved ones if it is such a pleasant name. Using it randomly on people you do not know is a not a sign of good upbringing.

You guys here are all about the dick, dick is everywhere, but I have lived 25yrs of my life without it and I didn’t die. I was only hurt he lied to me and led me on. Some of us are trusting. I know people that would have ransacked his house and social media pages, but I didn’t do that. I am not even on Facebook and Instagram. He preyed on the fact that I am quite private and trusting, direct your misgivings to him!!

daewoorazer:
At this point, I’m pretty sure you lack understanding what the term originality means. You’re the feminist wannabe here from all indications.

And let this be the last time you’re ever gonna hop on my mentions again

Heartbrokengirl:
I met a few members of his family. They were welcoming


He is muslim

Heartbrokengirl:
I am not a lesbian, but you might be correct about his colleague. She kept on complimenting my skin and jokingly asked if I am into women. I said I am not into women.

I haven’t trash talked him, plz don’t lie on me. Even when he told me, he expected me to insult him but I didn’t. He found it weird that I didn’t

Donjazzy12:
She asked if you were into women? As if that is not a red flag, you ladies still exchanged numbers!

The good man warned you about his colleague leading you into a bad life but you were not paying attention to that, you were more interested in his female colleague attention,so much you collected her number.

This story get as ebee. The man should be thanking his stars for deliverance. God just delivered him from a coded lesbian- YOU!

Please focus on your lesbianism. I asked you a very simple question if it was a married Lesbian that sucked your pussy would you break up and come to Nairaland to trash talk her?

I don't know why you lesbians hate men so much. What did your father do to you that of all things you chose lesbianism?
Thanks you for helping expose the underground lesbian movement in Nigeria.

yemmit90:
Anytime a man tell you he's 35years and above, please try to know at least few members of his family before you get serious with him.

Heartbrokengirl:
We didn’t. That was one thing that made me trust him more. I concluded he is different



Lolzzz. Glad his conscience worked

RedPanthar:
The absolution of your statements are atypical of one that quickly makes judgements without thorough evaluation of facts.



You're too assuming, too negative and too judgemental. The world would not fit into your narrative you know?



Be careful with how you judge!

Heartbender:
It's fine. Here I am in a supposed vacation with the "love of my life" whom I was hoping to tie the knots with somewhere in Abuja and getting shitloads of regret, hoping to leave for Port Harcourt earlier than I should and there you are just wanting to be loved right by the ones you want *sigh* God is with you. Take heart

Donjazzy12:
She asked if you were into women? As if that is not a red flag, you ladies still exchanged numbers!

The good man warned you about his colleague leading you into a bad life but you were not paying attention to that, you were more interested in his female colleague attention,so much you collected her number.

This story get as ebee. The man should be thanking his stars for deliverance. God just delivered him from a coded lesbian- YOU!

Please focus on your lesbianism. I asked you a very simple question if it was a married Lesbian that sucked your pussy would you break up and come to Nairaland to trash talk her?

I don't know why you lesbians hate men so much. What did your father do to you that of all things you chose lesbianism?
Thanks you for helping expose the underground lesbian movement in Nigeria.

toye440:
And are u a muslim or free thinker?

Donjazzy12:
I am not judging, I am merely stating facts! You read between the lines to understand. I had a job that brought me into a world of contact with lesbians! THEY ARE HIDING IN PLAIN SIGHT!

RedPanthar:
Nothing suggests lesbianism


If you want to make a better problem solver and critical thinker, strive to avoid " absolutionism ", you're too absolute. This will get you into trouble. Things will not always fit into your narrative

Heartbrokengirl:
Plz slow down. She complimented me and asked if he would bring me around more. We were having a general conversation and she was pleased. She said her phone was in the car and asked me to bring mine for her to dial her number. It was after that he deleted it, preventing me from saving it. She never messaged me either...



I am a christian

Gensece:
Check within yourself, do you still love him?
If yes, I don't see anything wrong in becoming wife #2, as long as the guy is sincere about the scenario
Reading from your narration, he has been playing the role of a caring and living BF now

Donjazzy12:
Read between the lines. God created man and woman, we ( smart Alec's) removed absolutism, now we have transgender! Now your gender is whatever you fancy at any given time!

Search for clues!

toye440:
First U cant be on thesame ship with Jonah and expect journey mercies, bae the truth is he took advantage of ur desperation and weakness for ever thinking u will find that man in ur dreams, we all do but the truth is perfect pple only exist in our dreams.
Pls know this, no successful handsome guy is available, they are all taken. But ask urself if marrying a muslim would work for u as over time u must convert which is not my problem, but his religion permits 4 can u share?
Love they say is blind but marriage na eye opener. I believe u have learnt a lesson, wear it round ur neck like a necklace. Adios Sis

RedPanthar:
Sorry. I learnt the path of peace long time ago. Which is to other worry about what a woman does with her vagina. Even if I'm being lied to, it's fairly okay than to lose my. Mental peace over warrantless worry. Na my own way to reason woman matter be that o

Heartbrokengirl:
It happened. He also felt too good to be real.




Thanks Julie. I have forgiven him for some reasons. I will forgive myself with time

Heartbender:
It's just me finding out that I've been on my own

Donjazzy12:
There is big difference between peace and peace of the graveyard! Don't forget that the graveyard is the most peaceful place on Earth. But that's exactly where nobody wants to be.

I worry about what others do, If not I won't comment If I hear any bad new or good news in other places. It is called responsibility. It also my right to observe. Right now homosexuality is a crime in Nigeria and beyond that, I don't know any Major religion that endorses it.

It is this type of nonchalance and negligence that is responsible for the very thriving underground lesbians and homosexuals movement in Nigeria.

People gloss over it.

RedPanthar:
If all handsome guys are all taken, please educate me why these guys were single till recently


Don jazzy

Lekan

Ozo

Jo

toye440:
Marriage and 9ja babes wahala after marriage.