₦airaland Forum

Anoymus:
I have a girlfriend I am meaning to propose to during the festive period, she's everything I want in a woman except few exception which might be a hindrance to the proposal.
Gist is, my babe is a graduate but lack of work made her to learn fashion designing, she's done with the training and she's very good with what she does.

After marriage, I have told her that I'll assist in her business, I'm planning to get a bigger shop space for her and equip it with modern day machines, tools and tailoring materials goods to help make her work lucrative. I'm budgeting about 1.2-1.5m for this.

The issue now is that, 3 days ago, I asked her what her role would be if eventually after marriage she gets the shop, equipments and all, where she would come in in terms of responsibilities in the house. Her reply was she doesn't want to assume any responsibility and that it's my duty to cater for the family and she can only help & I shouldn't make anything compulsory for her. So many thoughts came through my mind. One of it was that, where the proceeds of her investment would be going to if I should shoulder all the responsibilities in the house knowing fully well that she makes money.

I rang my mum and told her of her response, I was shocked that she backed her saying that I shouldn't have asked her to foot anything in the house that it was my sole responsibility as a man to cater for my family my wife inclusive. My dad too, same thing. Even told my gf mum about it too , she giggled and said I shouldn't have asked her n that it's my duty to provide for my family. They all sounded foreign to me. Or am I the one not understanding?

My question now is, why invest that kind of money in her when I'm not sure of getting little or nothing in terms in return help to run the family. That sum of money could get me 4 brand new bikes and 2 neatly used Keke Napep for transportation business. I'm sure I'll be getting returns from these investment weekly or monthly basis.

I don't want who wouldn't have any sense of responsibility at home after investing in her, even if she's covering 10% or 5% I wouldn't mind. Mere helping doesn't go down well with me, she might have and decide not to give out. I rather not invest at all and expect nothing from her.

I don't know if I'm the one over thinking this things or my parent and her mum aren't seeing things from my perspective or am I being inconsiderate?

Criticism, Insults and bashing are welcomed. Thanks

Did you bother to ask her what she is planning to bring to the table after marriage?

Anoymus:
I have a girlfriend I am meaning to propose to during the festive period, she's everything I want in a woman except few exception which might be a hindrance to the proposal.
Gist is, my babe is a graduate but lack of work made her to learn fashion designing, she's done with the training and she's very good with what she does.

After marriage, I have told her that I'll assist in her business, I'm planning to get a bigger shop space for her and equip it with modern day machines, tools and tailoring materials goods to help make her work lucrative. I'm budgeting about 1.2-1.5m for this.

The issue now is that, 3 days ago, I asked her what her role would be if eventually after marriage she gets the shop, equipments and all, where she would come in in terms of responsibilities in the house. Her reply was she doesn't want to assume any responsibility and that it's my duty to cater for the family and she can only help & I shouldn't make anything compulsory for her. So many thoughts came through my mind. One of it was that, where the proceeds of her investment would be going to if I should shoulder all the responsibilities in the house knowing fully well that she makes money.

I rang my mum and told her of her response, I was shocked that she backed her saying that I shouldn't have asked her to foot anything in the house that it was my sole responsibility as a man to cater for my family my wife inclusive. My dad too, same thing. Even told my gf mum about it too , she giggled and said I shouldn't have asked her n that it's my duty to provide for my family. They all sounded foreign to me. Or am I the one not understanding?

My question now is, why invest that kind of money in her when I'm not sure of getting little or nothing in terms in return help to run the family. That sum of money could get me 4 brand new bikes and 2 neatly used Keke Napep for transportation business. I'm sure I'll be getting returns from these investment weekly or monthly basis.

I don't want who wouldn't have any sense of responsibility at home after investing in her, even if she's covering 10% or 5% I wouldn't mind. Mere helping doesn't go down well with me, she might have and decide not to give out. I rather not invest at all and expect nothing from her.

I don't know if I'm the one over thinking this things or my parent and her mum aren't seeing things from my perspective or am I being inconsiderate?

Criticism, Insults and bashing are welcomed. Thanks

This one that you were quick to call your mum and dad,even her mum are you sure you're ready for marriage? Don't be quick to take your problem in marriage to you parents o,if you want your marriage to last..As for the investment I think you should not invest a that money on her.Buy some keke like you said and use the proceed to care for her and your future kids..

Notatribalist:
This one that you were quick to call your mum and dad,even her mum are you sure you're ready for marriage? Don't be quick to take your problem in marriage to you parents o,if you want your marriage to last..As for the investment I think you should not invest a that money on her.Buy some keke like you said and use the proceed to care for her and your future kids..

Noted. Thanks

Zzor:
Is he marrying her for gains, why have are you men becoming leeches smh

You are the leech, and you feel it is also your right to be a leech.. WTF. I feel like slapping you from.

Shortyy:
This is why advice everyone fend for themselves. To avoid, after all I've done for you. Or what will you give me in return.

What I see in your comment is that...you only sees the boy wanting something in return,you can't spot the insubordination in her attitude. This is a cynical way of living I must say

Anoymus:
I have a girlfriend I am meaning to propose to during the festive period, she's everything I want in a woman except few exception which might be a hindrance to the proposal.
Gist is, my babe is a graduate but lack of work made her to learn fashion designing, she's done with the training and she's very good with what she does.

After marriage, I have told her that I'll assist in her business, I'm planning to get a bigger shop space for her and equip it with modern day machines, tools and tailoring materials goods to help make her work lucrative. I'm budgeting about 1.2-1.5m for this.

The issue now is that, 3 days ago, I asked her what her role would be if eventually after marriage she gets the shop, equipments and all, where she would come in in terms of responsibilities in the house. Her reply was she doesn't want to assume any responsibility and that it's my duty to cater for the family and she can only help & I shouldn't make anything compulsory for her. So many thoughts came through my mind. One of it was that, where the proceeds of her investment would be going to if I should shoulder all the responsibilities in the house knowing fully well that she makes money.

I rang my mum and told her of her response, I was shocked that she backed her saying that I shouldn't have asked her to foot anything in the house that it was my sole responsibility as a man to cater for my family my wife inclusive. My dad too, same thing. Even told my gf mum about it too , she giggled and said I shouldn't have asked her n that it's my duty to provide for my family. They all sounded foreign to me. Or am I the one not understanding?

My question now is, why invest that kind of money in her when I'm not sure of getting little or nothing in terms in return help to run the family. That sum of money could get me 4 brand new bikes and 2 neatly used Keke Napep for transportation business. I'm sure I'll be getting returns from these investment weekly or monthly basis.

I don't want who wouldn't have any sense of responsibility at home after investing in her, even if she's covering 10% or 5% I wouldn't mind. Mere helping doesn't go down well with me, she might have and decide not to give out. I rather not invest at all and expect nothing from her.

I don't know if I'm the one over thinking this things or my parent and her mum aren't seeing things from my perspective or am I being inconsiderate?

Criticism, Insults and bashing are welcomed. Thanks

nothing is wrong with your decision...invest on your self not her. Do you think she will change after marriage?. I have one with me who doesn't wanna contribute a dime however small it is and I have said to myself that be for I will make her,I'll do for myself first cos I run the family expenses...na you know dey listen to people judging from one side of a story. The is 21st century...open your eyes and look for other disadvantages from her part...greedy fellow

SweetCunt97:
Atleast she did not pretend. Best you remove eye from woman money sha or go marry oyibo

Apa ni e. you are such a kunt..a stinking one at that

if u can easily afford 1.5 million to p1mp up her shop then why complaining when she told u that u should be the one to cater for the finances in the home when she marries u.u are a big boy so money should not be an issue for you.Let her take care of the kitchen while u take care of the finances

samyj2477:
If you marry her just pray that u don't encounter any prolonged financial problem if not, a total disaster awaits u.

he wont encounter any financial problem.op is a rich guy.If someone can sink 1.5 million into im girlfriend tailor business then little thing like home finances wont have any dent on his money

Tango123:
I canmot live in a house with a woman that contributes nothing.

If u begin that after marriage, that is reason for divorce

If u sjow me that attitide before marriage, i wont marry u no more

OP, God has revealed who she is to u

Marry her and know her money is hers for make up and clothes and hair and her family, while u slave to death

And when she looks too good for u, she will dump u and marry a richer man

I know i WONT marry a parasite. Thank God for the woman i married. She contributes according to her earning power. Anyday she decides to stop, end of marriage (she is not that kind of womn though)

ur wife sitting on the sitting room coach all day watching zee world or african magic is also contribution to the home front nau.U think its easy laying down on a coach all day eating fried chips and watching indian films 24/7 .U try it if u think its easy.In short of u have a wife as such u should even be happy cos she will be part of the decoration in the sitting room

Zzor:
Is he marrying her for gains, why have are you men becoming leeches smh

It's also wise for him to not invest in her yet if he should not expect her to shoulder any financial responsibility. Let the woman make her own money and enjoy all alone. The man should do the same, but take care of the family's finances all alone and buy gifts for her only when he feels like.

danilmo:
oga marry and invest on her, forget financial returns but be rest assured u would save urself the headache of her always asking for Undies, clothings, hair wig, owambe , cream and all those women financial need..

My mum is a salary earner in 6digit but my dad don't really worry himself with that, he does everything for the family, even buying her a car on top.. mum only spend money on creams, toothpaste, soap, asoebi for owambe party , party cloth for her and her husband, help her relatives financially and that's all

That useless era is gone

NiRfreak:
Apa ni e. you are such a kunt..a stinking one at that

Whatever dude. E pain am

Zzor:
Is he marrying her for gains, why have are you men becoming leeches smh

Is like this olso has come again

Anoymus:
I have a girlfriend I am meaning to propose to during the festive period, she's everything I want in a woman except few exception which might be a hindrance to the proposal.
Gist is, my babe is a graduate but lack of work made her to learn fashion designing, she's done with the training and she's very good with what she does.

After marriage, I have told her that I'll assist in her business, I'm planning to get a bigger shop space for her and equip it with modern day machines, tools and tailoring materials goods to help make her work lucrative. I'm budgeting about 1.2-1.5m for this.

The issue now is that, 3 days ago, I asked her what her role would be if eventually after marriage she gets the shop, equipments and all, where she would come in in terms of responsibilities in the house. Her reply was she doesn't want to assume any responsibility and that it's my duty to cater for the family and she can only help & I shouldn't make anything compulsory for her. So many thoughts came through my mind. One of it was that, where the proceeds of her investment would be going to if I should shoulder all the responsibilities in the house knowing fully well that she makes money.

I rang my mum and told her of her response, I was shocked that she backed her saying that I shouldn't have asked her to foot anything in the house that it was my sole responsibility as a man to cater for my family my wife inclusive. My dad too, same thing. Even told my gf mum about it too , she giggled and said I shouldn't have asked her n that it's my duty to provide for my family. They all sounded foreign to me. Or am I the one not understanding?

My question now is, why invest that kind of money in her when I'm not sure of getting little or nothing in terms in return help to run the family. That sum of money could get me 4 brand new bikes and 2 neatly used Keke Napep for transportation business. I'm sure I'll be getting returns from these investment weekly or monthly basis.

I don't want who wouldn't have any sense of responsibility at home after investing in her, even if she's covering 10% or 5% I wouldn't mind. Mere helping doesn't go down well with me, she might have and decide not to give out. I rather not invest at all and expect nothing from her.

I don't know if I'm the one over thinking this things or my parent and her mum aren't seeing things from my perspective or am I being inconsiderate?

Criticism, Insults and bashing are welcomed. Thanks

Zzor want to snatch you

Geniemoi01:
If you are foolish enough to end up marrying her, you'll hate yourself ×100!

Ignore what your parents are telling you. They are very traditional. But your wife isn't traditional. Most girls only want to take and take without giving anything back. Without contributing.

All of the money will be used for herself and her family! In the event that you fall sick or lose your job or have a financial setback, she won't wanna lift a finger and even if she does she'll make you hate yourself. Or in a worse case scenario she's gonna leave you when she feels she's now equal to you or financially better than you.
You better be wise!!!

You better be wise !!! You better be wise!!!

Im talking to you from practical experience! Don't say you weren't warned!

Marrying a woman who has not worked and knows the stress in making money can be very fatal

They have a sense of entitelment and won't appreciate what you are giving them.
The ones working or worked or struggled before to get a job are more appreciative

What some men do is they turn them to house wife fully
Let her focus on birthing children and raising them up

Maybe later you can now set up something for her. That's how some of my business men colleagues did.

One I am close to recently invested millions into his wife's business. She don born 4 Children for the guy. But she is a very good woman, supporting, appreciating her husband and respecting and submitting to Him.
Apart from that he recently also bought a brand new SUV for her


The woman was appreciative because she is good

Where op will hate himself is if the woman in question is selfish and unappreciative
It may cause big problem in the marriage

He must be sure he is marrying a good woman
If not he will just learn to be patient and tolerative
But being with a selfish partner is not a nice experience

Tell her you are no more interested in the marriage. Let her ask you why. Then you tell her that you don't want to marry an unsupportive woman. Talk about it indepthly with her. Times have changed. Women nowadays are the one preaching equality so the equality must extend to finances.

She has been misunderstood by you. You are not supposed to allocate any responsibility to her. Rather let her make her contribution to the home keeping.

Anoymus:
wow!

In this life, understand that everybody does not have thesame mental capacity.

Trying to make a horse reason like a human, you will end up wounding yourself. Just a figure of speech.

Learn how to give what you won't regret because not everyone is a giver. Obviously, your wife to be is not a giver.

If you give generously to such people, and later you fall into hardship, they will laugh at your generosity like stupidity.

Life is very deep, even your family members can cheat you in life. It happened to Joseph, they will use you and laugh at you later.

So be wise, if she is good, marry her. You can equip her with half of what you planned earlier, then don't expect anything from her since she has the brain capacity of a toddler.

Lol.

Nazgul:
She's a very selfish person. I hate girls that reason that way. How can you look at a guy who invested 1.5m on you, married you, housed you, feeds you and tell him that you won't contribute to the home?

She has clearly told you that you stand to benefit nothing from her if you go ahead with the marriage plans.

Whatever action you decide to take is up to you.

Yeah I agree with this guy.
What would she be doing with her earnings as a married woman anyway.
I think marraige should be sharing responsibilities.
I mean tho if U love someone n do/give for them U shouldn't expect anything in return.
Also tho if she loves you she should want to help you n do her part because that's wat marraige is about.
So basically this girl expects this guy to marry her n basically she doesn't do anything as a wife?
If I was the guy I would explain his point of view to her n if she can't understand that there's plenty of girls to marry who would. Unless he loves her ofcourse.

Cut that money into half and use it to set up the business for her,keep the half for yourself to add to what you will use in taking care of the family. She just told you what every woman believe. They believe that it is your responsibility to suffer head

What do you expect from a gynocentric society where men are being treated like a means to an end? It's clear that your Dad lived through this system and had been brainwashed to think that women don't have a role to play in providing for the family. Well, brother, my advice is this simple. You're in a matrix and you can clearly see a bullet heading towards your direction, you have two choices, let it go through you so that you can feel the impact or dodge it. The choice is yours sir.

mylovee:
She has been misunderstood by you. You are not supposed to allocate any responsibility to her. Rather let her make her contribution to the home keeping.

Yeah. I agree with you on this one. She seems not to understand the question just like most women i know

400billionman:
In this life, understand that everybody does not have thesame mental capacity.

Trying to make a horse reason like a human, you will end up wounding yourself. Just a figure of speech.

Learn how to give what you won't regret because not everyone is a giver. Obviously, your wife to be is not a giver.

If you give generously to such people, and later you fall into hardship, they will laugh at your generosity like stupidity.

Life is very deep, even your family members can cheat you in life. It happened to Joseph, they will use you and laugh at you later.

So be wise, if she is good, marry her. You can equip her with half of what you planned earlier, then don't expect anything from her since she has the brain capacity of a toddler.

Lol.

LMAO

Oil no go Finnish for your head,
OP you caused it from.the on set by showing her how much you have or can afford.

aminu114:
man she will probably left u when she is financially secured

lefulefu:
he wont encounter any financial problem.op is a rich guy.If someone can sink 1.5 million into im girlfriend tailor business then little thing like home finances wont have any dent on his money

lols I hope so.

You are trying to change her to the person she is not, some can assist you when doing family duties, they will be working and doing well it is not easy, it start from the foundation when she was young she is not use to the work and relationship section of life, some girls are not created for work, they just want to be married and sit there like a log of wood... but some can work and even support you with financial needs... so thank God that she was able to tell you the life she want on time so the ball is in your court now....

Anoymus:
I have a girlfriend I am meaning to propose to during the festive period, she's everything I want in a woman except few exception which might be a hindrance to the proposal.
Gist is, my babe is a graduate but lack of work made her to learn fashion designing, she's done with the training and she's very good with what she does.

After marriage, I have told her that I'll assist in her business, I'm planning to get a bigger shop space for her and equip it with modern day machines, tools and tailoring materials goods to help make her work lucrative. I'm budgeting about 1.2-1.5m for this.

The issue now is that, 3 days ago, I asked her what her role would be if eventually after marriage she gets the shop, equipments and all, where she would come in in terms of responsibilities in the house. Her reply was she doesn't want to assume any responsibility and that it's my duty to cater for the family and she can only help & I shouldn't make anything compulsory for her. So many thoughts came through my mind. One of it was that, where the proceeds of her investment would be going to if I should shoulder all the responsibilities in the house knowing fully well that she makes money.

I rang my mum and told her of her response, I was shocked that she backed her saying that I shouldn't have asked her to foot anything in the house that it was my sole responsibility as a man to cater for my family my wife inclusive. My dad too, same thing. Even told my gf mum about it too , she giggled and said I shouldn't have asked her n that it's my duty to provide for my family. They all sounded foreign to me. Or am I the one not understanding?

My question now is, why invest that kind of money in her when I'm not sure of getting little or nothing in terms in return help to run the family. That sum of money could get me 4 brand new bikes and 2 neatly used Keke Napep for transportation business. I'm sure I'll be getting returns from these investment weekly or monthly basis.

I don't want who wouldn't have any sense of responsibility at home after investing in her, even if she's covering 10% or 5% I wouldn't mind. Mere helping doesn't go down well with me, she might have and decide not to give out. I rather not invest at all and expect nothing from her.

I don't know if I'm the one over thinking this things or my parent and her mum aren't seeing things from my perspective or am I being inconsiderate?

Criticism, Insults and bashing are welcomed. Thanks

Don't marry her or don't do it! My elder brother did it. He is based in Lagos. He got her a shop worth 1.5 Million. Put in an extra 1 million-1.2 million to support her business. After sometime my brother business suffered a very serious hit, she refused to help out. Meanwhile her business was booming! Before you know it she stopped sleeping at home. Any little misunderstanding, she would just pay for a hotel and sleep outside. Today, they are divorced, she went along to start dating a small boy, because she felt she now has money. Thank God my Bros is now picking up!

DONT TRY IT! INVEST IN YOUR OWN BUSINESS. OR LOOK FOR ONE OF YOUR VERY TRUSTWORTHY FRIENDS OR RELATIONS AND INVEST IN THEM. MOST WOMEN OF NOWADAYS ARE WORTHLESS AS HELP MATES!

Anoymus, marry her and invest in yourself. You don't want this type of woman to have more money than you at home, trust me. Rather build your finances (lucky you're in Nigeria) and invest in your children

I literally try to know y some of you answer this way

Snaagg:
who gives a fukk about what turns you off?

parasite.

you want a man to give you what your father has never given your mother nor done for you

I've gat one word for u. RUUUNNNNNNN!!!!!!!

You called your mom to ask her? ahah. The girl will be the one making a mistake marrying you.
Do you think she'll truly not contribute anything to the family? Even her knows it's not possible, her money must drop sha ni.