korilala:
Blackmailed By My Ex!!! Don't Know What To Do.

I dated this lady several years back but due to her promiscuity we broke up but by then she was pregnant for me.

When my daughter clocked 3, I asked for my daughter to stay with me (she's staying with her mother's family) but she gave me a condition. That I forgive her and forget the past and we should plan a future together with our daughter. For my daughter's sake I accepted and she moved in with us but alas she still messages her ex and still reaches out to them. I confronted her again today and her reply to me is "you better don't kill yourself."

We're not married but every time I tell her to leave she threatens to take our daughter who is only five years old and who has grown a strong bond to me.

Mods in the house please advise me.

korilala:
Blackmailed By My Ex!!! Don't Know What To Do.

I dated this lady several years back but due to her promiscuity we broke up but by then she was pregnant for me.

When my daughter clocked 3, I asked for my daughter to stay with me (she's staying with her mother's family) but she gave me a condition. That I forgive her and forget the past and we should plan a future together with our daughter. For my daughter's sake I accepted and she moved in with us but alas she still messages her ex and still reaches out to them. I confronted her again today and her reply to me is "you better don't kill yourself."

We're not married but every time I tell her to leave she threatens to take our daughter who is only five years old and who has grown a strong bond to me.

Mods in the house please advise me.

PrimeWatermark:
Are you sure the child is yours?

So as old as you are, you can't even take charge.

Please if you know you can't act like a man, you better don't bother getting married before you start bringing shame to real men like us.

Mtcheeeeeew

korilala:
Blackmailed By My Ex!!! Don't Know What To Do.

I dated this lady several years back but due to her promiscuity we broke up but by then she was pregnant for me.

When my daughter clocked 3, I asked for my daughter to stay with me (she's staying with her mother's family) but she gave me a condition. That I forgive her and forget the past and we should plan a future together with our daughter. For my daughter's sake I accepted and she moved in with us but alas she still messages her ex and still reaches out to them. I confronted her again today and her reply to me is "you better don't kill yourself."

We're not married but every time I tell her to leave she threatens to take our daughter who is only five years old and who has grown a strong bond to me.

Mods in the house please advise me.

korilala:
Blackmailed By My Ex!!! Don't Know What To Do.

I dated this lady several years back but due to her promiscuity we broke up but by then she was pregnant for me.

When my daughter clocked 3, I asked for my daughter to stay with me (she's staying with her mother's family) but she gave me a condition. That I forgive her and forget the past and we should plan a future together with our daughter. For my daughter's sake I accepted and she moved in with us but alas she still messages her ex and still reaches out to them. I confronted her again today and her reply to me is "you better don't kill yourself."

We're not married but every time I tell her to leave she threatens to take our daughter who is only five years old and who has grown a strong bond to me.

Mods in the house please advise me.

In Okoli V. Okoli (2003) 8 NWLR (PT. 823) 565 @ 580, the Court of Appeal in discussing the custody of a child born outside wedlock held that the custody of a child born out of wedlock follows that of the mother in the absence of any person claiming custody of the child of being the natural father.

korilala:
Blackmailed By My Ex!!! Don't Know What To Do.

I dated this lady several years back but due to her promiscuity we broke up but by then she was pregnant for me.

When my daughter clocked 3, I asked for my daughter to stay with me (she's staying with her mother's family) but she gave me a condition. That I forgive her and forget the past and we should plan a future together with our daughter. For my daughter's sake I accepted and she moved in with us but alas she still messages her ex and still reaches out to them. I confronted her again today and her reply to me is "you better don't kill yourself."

We're not married but every time I tell her to leave she threatens to take our daughter who is only five years old and who has grown a strong bond to me.

Mods in the house please advise me.

korilala:
Blackmailed By My Ex!!! Don't Know What To Do.

I dated this lady several years back but due to her promiscuity we broke up but by then she was pregnant for me.

When my daughter clocked 3, I asked for my daughter to stay with me (she's staying with her mother's family) but she gave me a condition. That I forgive her and forget the past and we should plan a future together with our daughter. For my daughter's sake I accepted and she moved in with us but alas she still messages her ex and still reaches out to them. I confronted her again today and her reply to me is "you better don't kill yourself."

We're not married but every time I tell her to leave she threatens to take our daughter who is only five years old and who has grown a strong bond to me.

Mods in the house please advise me.

banio:



If it were my sister that child will NEVER be yours. Except You come and marry either the mother or the child.

So You are looking for free child.

Sixfeetbelle:
Baby mama gang, come and see your mate

RedPanthar:
SIMP. Why it's okay to be lovey Dovey in the dating phase, that's not the standpoint from which a man must run a home, family and manage a marriage.


A man must take the lead, hold the reims, take charge and make decisions albeit inspiring cooperation from his partner. Your comment indicates that you're weak, too weak to assume control over your affairs and can't manage yourself let alone a human being



Let's look at it from a myriad of ways...


... Where did you learn your fatherhood skills from. Did you grow up in a broken home and raised by just a woman? You need to first sink into your psyche, speak with people to help you identify your obvious weakness which you seem to be unaware about and beginning the fixing in your mind. You are too weak to be qualified as an adult man



.... Tell me of what use is a daughter you don't truly inspire her as father, daughter and her source of everything... While the daughter maybe yours, the close bond that has kept you out of her life is deliberately schemed to ensure everything she knows is purely from what her snake mother tells her. Making her of little to no use beyond emotional attachment, this you don't know or choose to ignore the complications. Even if that girl grows under you with the way she's under the mothers tight grip, you have little to nothing to benefit from fathering her. The fatherhood and family structure is defective and destructive. You have no advantage fathering that child... And if you want to be in her life as a father, you need to assume the role and stop acting like a sperm donor. If you won't stop begging as it shows in your comments that even your day to day activities is begging to be the child's father, get out of their life and go fix yourself




Go and get yourself some redpill and develop mentally and psychologically. You're too weak.



She only used you when she ran into tight corner and you SIMPed for her antics




Grow some balls, be the man and stop whining. If you want her out, when she goes whoring, ensure she comes back to meet her thrash outside the door. And begin to act like you don't care about the child even if you do. Hide the love, withold all show of affection that's being used to control you. And steal back the remote control being used to control you from her hand



You're pathetically weak.

Leave the child for now, work on yourself first. You're too weak for a man

Whatever you do, make sure you get " Redpilled "

Openbusiness:
Don't ever let any babymama threaten you with taking your child away. YOU HAVE THE BLOODY ADVANTAGE. Forget about what you know about America or Western countries, NIGERIA SYSTEM is DIFFERENT. A woman ONLY has legal upperhand to win child custody IF YOU WERE MARRIED. But fortunately for you, you didn't marry her. By Custody Law in Nigeria, for unmarried parents, THE FATHER GETS CUSTODY OF HIS CHILD, not the mother. The mother can only keep the child IF the father is not available or didn't claim the child. But once a father makes CLAIM for his child, THE ONLY REQUIREMENT is for him to PROVE PATERNITY. Once you can prove the paternity, child custody is given to YOU.

Most men don't know this. IN NIGERIA THE CHILD BELONGS TO THE FATHER, for unmarried parents. The mother can only take custody IF nobody is coming forward claiming to be the father and proving paternity.

omooba969:
[s][/s]

Na so u com write epistle on top another person matter, nawa for you o!

Wetin be the meaning of SIMP sef?

Simp dey call him fellow man simp - so easy to advise.

onyeogalu1:





Your daughter is still a child and as far she is under 18 years by Nigerian law the mother will be awarded the custody in an event of a lawsuit.
So don't kill yourself, if you can stay with the woman good for you but if you can't then move on.

Yamiriflathead:


Even for married couples recognized by the customary court, a father can file for a child's custody once the child is above 7.
Av witnessed such cases before

Yamiriflathead:


This is wrong... The custody of children above 7 are awarded to Fathers, except the man no follow up the issue for court

Openbusiness:
Regardless, married or unmarried a father can always make claim for child custody BUT the woman has the upperhand for married parents. If she can demonstrate she has the capacity to keep custody, that is to say, she has her own accomodation, job etc, she will win the custody. But the father will still get visiting rights, BUT the child will be with his wife, and then the Court will also tell him to pay her child support for the upkeep of the child. So, this equation favors the woman. Unless the man na one wealthy man with connections that can use big money to buy his way and bend the rules.

But it's a DIFFERENT BALL GAME for unmarried parents, the Father has upperhand to KEEP custody of his child. The woman will get visitation rights, and the man won't be paying her 1 Kobo for child support, cuz the child is with him. So, in Nigeria, child custody favors the father for unmarried parents but favors the mother for married parents aka court wedding. But if na traditional wedding only, na the father get the child 100%

Yamiriflathead:


YES, traditional marriage cases on child custody are usually adjudicated in customary courts, we are saying the same thing.

inumidun2010:
The type of news I hear daily makes me get scared of getting married... My Life, my Focus..

Yamiriflathead:


YES, traditional marriage cases on child custody are usually adjudicated in customary courts, we are saying the same thing.

Openbusiness:


Traditional marriage = ✓
Church wedding = ✓
Court wedding = BONDAGE = ❌

Court wedding puts a man at a huge disadvantage, unless the man is fortunate that EITHER:
1) he married a "good" woman. They are very rare, u prolly stand a chance of finding a real-life breathing dinosaur or finding the chariot that took Elijah to Heaven than finding a "good woman" nowadays .
2) he married an "illiterate" woman. Not in terms of paper education, she might have PhD sef. I mean in terms of being WOKE. If he marries a woman that her eyes ain't open to capitalize on her advantage. Lucky him.

specialmati:
marry her na

omooba969:

Don't be scared, marriage izza beautiful thing.
Btw, Nairaland is quite toxic for marriage matters.