wallg123:
...
Ok .... let’s agree to disagree....let everybody bring raise there children to the best of there ability and make we leave the rest to God...

Totally agree with you

Truly parenthood and even adulthood hard no be small... To think some of us couldn't wait to grow up.... if only we knew childhood stage still the best .

May God grant us the wisdom to do what right by our family as one size doesnt fit all. what works in ones house might not work in another. ....

As Nigerians we believe that beating a child is a good corrective method and a lot of this believe comes from the fact that we were beaten and we turned out fine. But the thing is, we didn’t turn out fine because we were beaten or corrected, we turned out fine because we decided to turn out fine. Because of that childhood beating we now have itching hands, when a child does anything we perceive as wrong the next thing is to hit that child.

If I am to advice anyone, I will say one should try everything possible to not beat their child, reason is cos learning this days is far far different from how we learnt in those days. Now children understand conversation and because they are thought this things in school, they now believe that their parents are suppose to talk to them or discuss things with them and not hit them. As a parent who lived both life’s (old and new), you should understand that environment is key in everything in life, if your child is here, you have no option but to raise them as it is done here( by this I mean the right ways), if they are in Naija you can add some of the things of their surroundings in discipline. If you treat or raise a child here in the Naija way, you will break that child, trust me, and if he’s in Naija you have to raise him the Naija way but add civilization to it.

E no easy at all but, I think it’s the right thing to do. Expecially in this modern day, cos you can’t be living the old ways in this new age.

Chreze:
As Nigerians we believe that beating a child is a good corrective method and a lot of this believe comes from the fact that we were beaten and we turned out fine. But the thing is, we didn’t turn out fine because we were beaten or corrected, we turned out fine because we decided to turn out fine. Because of that childhood beating we now have itching hands, when a child does anything we perceive as wrong the next thing is to hit that child.

If I am to advice anyone, I will say one should try everything possible to not beat their child, reason is cos learning this days is far far different from how we learnt in those days. Now children understand conversation and because they are thought this things in school, they now believe that their parents are suppose to talk to them or discuss things with them and not hit them. As a parent who lived both life’s (old and new), you should understand that environment is key in everything in life, if your child is here, you have no option but to raise them as it is done here( by this I mean the right ways), if they are in Naija you can add some of the things of their surroundings in discipline. If you treat or raise a child here in the Naija way, you will break that child, trust me, and if he’s in Naija you have to raise him the Naija way but add civilization to it.

E no easy at all but, I think it’s the right thing to do. Expecially in this modern day, cos you can’t be living the old ways in this new age.

Some oyibo spank codely as well ooo.... dont be deceived.....When you get close to them that when you realise, although maybe not as harsh as an African parents but I seen quite a few who do . Unspoken words not openly mention

Even as Lexusgs430 mentioned , Tony Blair later admitted to spanking his children

LagosismyHome:


A lot of oyibo spank closely as well ooo.... font be decided. When you get close to them that when you realise, although maybe not as harsh as an African parents but I seen quite a few who do

Even as said, Tony Blair later admitted to spanking

Truth is I have seen them spank their child, but I noticed the ones who spank their children have some kind of issues. Like the junkie parents and illiterate ones. Not to be one sided, but that’s from my experience, those junkie parents reason completely different, one would wonder if they are OYibo’s as we call them.

Make God just help person because some children de wey them beat well well and they turned out great, some de wey them no beat and them b stab-star. parenting sometimes can be scary I no go lie. That part of you that wants to be a good parent is what makes it scary.

Abeg this siren wey de blow almost every hour, shey na COVID patient them be, because the thing de sometimes make me fear for doctors and what they are going thru. I wonder why people don’t want to take this COVID seriously.

Aphrodite007:


Yeah I support you, was just messing around. It normalises violence in the kids eyes, rather than just communicating. That’s why lots of Nigerians struggle to communicate, own up to wrong doings and apologise.

But I’ll beat mine once a year. I have to put the fear of God in it

Chreze:
Abeg this siren wey de blow almost every hour, shey na COVID patient them be, because the thing de sometimes make me fear for doctors and what they are going thru. I wonder why people don’t want to take this COVID seriously.

Most likely they transporting COVID-19 patients to ICU....
Till today few person still think say COVID-19 na Scarm .....especially our people ...

wallg123:


Most likely they transporting COVID-19 patients to ICU....
Till today few person still think say COVID-19 na Scarm .....especially our people ...

Drink ya got water and lime with hot milk

Aprokodaughter:


Drink ya got water and lime with hot milk

Na the antidote be that ?
Me now I dey always drink ginger + honey and lemon tea now...... until e reach my turn to take vaccine

wallg123:


Majority of the English people don’t beat there kids but they turn out to be good people in the society while most of the black kids in London and it’s environs that end up stabbing them selves come from homes were the parents beat them and yet e no correct there head.... do the maths

Where do you people get all these statistics from sef?

First it was crime rate being ore in Nigeria than the UK now it's white kids being better acclimatized than blacks...

Abeg my brother jeje!

wallg123:


Most likely they transporting COVID-19 patients to ICU....
Till today few person still think say COVID-19 na Scarm .....especially our people ...

Men it’s scary, I just pity doctors. I am sure a lot of them didn’t sign up for what’s happening now. God go give them the mind and faith to continue the good work.

Truly it aint easy ,just pray this pandemic slows down

Chreze:


Men it’s scary, I just pity doctors. I am sure a lot of them didn’t sign up for what’s happening now. God go give them the mind and faith to continue the good work.

iboboyswag:


Where do you people get all these statistics from sef?

First it was crime rate being ore in Nigeria than the UK now it's white kids being better acclimatized than blacks...

Abeg my brother jeje!

What is this one talking about

Yeah, I was trying to clarify that I wasn't a prospective student. Thank you, I just checked.

Aprokodaughter:


Yes I understood your question correctly. I have seen nairalanders talk about data analytics and also advise people to go and apply for the course on the prospective student thread.

Surprised nobody is responding to your questions on that thread or here

Have you seen ICode2 response to your question? Sometimes read your mentions as well.

Thank you. I will check there.

iCode2:
Ask here https://www.nairaland.com/5485400/chronicle-data-scientist-analyst/83

Hebraeem:
Yeah, I was trying to clarify that I wasn't a prospective student. Thank you, I just checked.

I never said you were prospective student I only said People do talk about the course on that platform.

Sorry I got involved with your issue.

I for just pass your question like other nairalanders.

Ralphlauren:


I have a lot to share but I will start with pricing.

Houses are usually advertised as FIXED PRICE, OFFERS IN THE REGION OF and OFFERS ABOVE A CERTAIN PRICE.

Before you place a bid or even consider buying a property, the first thing you should look at and read carefully is the valuation report (called the Home report in Scotland). This report is prepared by a valuer registered with the Royal institute of Chartered Surveyors and it details independent checks carried out by the valuer on the property, the reinstatement value of the property and most importantly, the value of the property in the open market.

The value of the property as stated in the valuation report should be compared with the starting price advertised by the sellers and the price at which similar properties have sold within the same area for a particular period.

Please note that there isn't any bank that will lend you money (mortgage) that is higher than the value of the property stated on the valuation report. A lot of first time buyers make this mistake/false assumption and when they realise they can't fork out the difference, they pull put of the purchase and the sale falls through, leaving them with legal fees and disgusted sellers, etc.

For example, if a property is valued by the valuer as £300,000 and the seller asks for offers above £300,000 and he accepts a bid of £350,000, the bank will lend up to £300,000. This means the buyer would have to put down a deposit of 15% of £300,000 (most lenders are currently not accepting deposits below 15% because of the current economic uncertainty due to covid) and the £50,000 difference will come from the sellers purse plus additional legal fees. So in total, the buyer is putting down £95,000 as deposit.

Its very important not to get carried away with bidding wars and pay over the value of a property. My first purchase was advertised as fixed price and I was able to get £1000 knocked off as the property didn't come with a fridge/freezer and washing machine. Personally, I have never bought a property above the value stated on the valuation report. I take my time, do my research and get the one that fits my budget.

When bidding/buying a property, calculator is your best friend. you need to have a budget and stick to it. During bidding, start with £1000 above the guide price and instruct your lawyers to keep in regular touch with the seller's solicitors until you agree on an acceptable bid or you walk away.

My most recent purchase was advertised as asking for offers £10,000 below the value of the property. I started bidding by adding £1,000 each time and after some back and forth and assurances to them that missives will be completed within 5 weeks, they accepted a final sale price which was exactly the value as seen on the valuation report.

I will also suggest leaving an impression with the sellers during viewing. I have a friend who bidded for a property but the sellers accepted a lower bid from a young couple because they said my friend was buying the property for investment unlike the young couple that were just starting out with a baby on the way.

If you are not the first time buyer of the property, I will suggest you look at the previous sale price and how much the property has appreciated or depreciated in value throughout its history. You can do same for similar properties in the area and this will give you an idea on the potential future value of the property.

Set up property notification alerts on zoopla, rightmove, espc, etc and arrange a viewing as soon as you see a property you like. The earlier you put in a bid before other buyers, the better. You do not have to wait until your lawyers put in an offer on your behalf. Let the selling solicitors know that you would like to put in an informal note of interest and your solicitors will be in touch.

You also have to consider legal fees, mortgage advisor fees and stamp duty fees.

Stamp duty fees are so annoying. What you pay depends on if the value of your property is above a certain threshold and whether or not its your first home/main home. There is currently stamp duty holiday which i believes end in March.

Finally, interior decor of a property is key. It can influence the value of a property and attract big spenders to purchase the property.

If you have other questions, tag me and I'll respond.

Thank you for these explanations.

But from what I understand,you don't get to do the valuation of the property until you have placed a bid and it has been offered.

The only way I have been checking the prices is by using the data gotten on Zoopla or right move coupled with ourproperty.co.uk.

Or I'm I mistaken?

phyl123:


Beating a child doesn’t solve the solution all it’s doing is just encouraging violence.

I disagree with you. Spare the rod and spoil the child said the wisest man that ever lived. As a child,I received correct flogging. It shaped me into whom I am today. I see better behaved children in Nigeria than in the UK.

Divine88:

Discipline is the opposite of punishment.
Discipline is non judgemental, non controlling and does not create fear.

Sounds like words of nowadays motivational speakers. How do you intend doing above without being judgemental ,in control and without the child having fear of such measure in the future?

wallg123:
I am a product of better beating/flogging by both my parents, teachers and relations and bullies in school. However I’m not in favour of beating my children because I don’t think it’s effect in the UK and I don’t want issues with social services. ...

There are a lot of ways to discipline you children without physically harming them. For instance I seize there toys, I send them to do time out in the toilet of in there room, I take away the privilege of watching cartoons. After the timeout I call them out and we have a discussion so they understand why I did that to them and they say sorry we get back to being normal.

If we say beating children is very effective, then why are there loads of criminals, cultist, armed robbers in our secondary schools and universities in Nigeria ?
If we say beating is very effective and in UK beating is not allowed, then there would have been more crime in Uk when compared to Nigeria, but this is not the case.

Children these days are very smart. They learn very fast from there parents, tv, internet and other children ...... We should all take it easy when dealing with our children in this country before social service will take you child away from you and there’s nothing you can do about it ....

My partner is a teacher and I know how many children from Africa and Asian families that have been reported to social service .......

If the statistics of Nigeria having more crime than the UK were true,it would have to do with lesser chances of catching criminals in Nigeria than in the UK. If UK were to be a country where people commit crime and easily get away with it,I think its crime rate will be much higher than Nigeria.
Also,most people who commit crimes in Nigeria come from broken homes or from homes with so many children that can't be taken care off so most of them end up being drop outs from schools and subsequently go into crime.

In addition,the general poor living standard and high unemployment rate in Nigeria despite individual efforts force some percentage of people in Nigeria into crime. Just picture having the UK people under the harsh economy condition of Nigeria and tell me if they won't have burned down the country. If there were jobs in Nigeria that can fetch everyone daily meals with some savings in pockets, and people get caught when crime is commited, the crime rate will be drastically reduced.

Compare the average teenager from Nigeria and that from the UK ,which of them have better manners ,respect and a sense of responsiblities?

famzynet:


I disagree with you. Spare the rod and spoil the child said the wisest man that ever lived. As a child,I received correct flogging. It shaped me into whom I am today. I see better behaved children in Nigeria than in the UK.

Most people that make this statement are greedy and selfish (generally not you Biko) .

Because what have Africans gained from this flogging and beating kids like drum.

We still experience killings, robbery, ritual killings, kidnapping, corruption and election violence.

African kids are very tamed every little thing they have inferiority complex some can't even think for themselves (I did not say everyone before someone will read my comment upside down).

Every child should be treated differently. Beating has not solved anything some Africans(Nigerians especially don't like take corrections is the beating that makes some behave like that?)

Some Nigerians they say the beating shaped their life small thing or misunderstanding Nigerians will start insulting your life because of a disagreement.

Is it the flogging that makes Africans behave like?

So many Parents have killed their children because of this Biblical verse.

Some Nigerian children have killed their parents because this religious verse.

Some Nigerian kids are so damaged that they will go to boarding house and start fighting and being violent.

Some people will applaud this behavior it's totally wrong.

Flogging has never helped. Pikin wey wan stubborn go stubborn just look for a way that will discipline the child effectively.

Long post alert:

It is important to understand your child and the child's personality.

Some children are severely wounded by words and would welcome spanking.

Some children would prefer to be talked to and would feel damaged and great resentment over being spanked.

When you want to spank, stop for a moment and check with your emotions.. Are you spanking because you are angry or are you spanking because of what the child has done?

A huge percentage of times, your spanking is done when your emotions are heightened, if you STOP and count to 10,would you still spank?

I was determined to use my default Naija method to raise my children. When I had my first, I did very very few light smacks on the bottom and threatened with wooden spoon(in their whole life, max 5-6 times) but I realised that each time, this particular child would be inconsolable and would be so fearful.

The effect was too much and unbearable for us as parents, we literally would sit and talk about it and would recount our emotional state, was it anger and the urge to expend that anger? Recounting the child's reaction caused us so much misery and we made a conscious decision to cease smacking completely between ages 3-4.

When sibling arrived, we applied same method. It is not easy at all when your hand is shaking with righteous indignation, begging for instant application of justice to the erring party particularly because of how we were raised.

We finessed time out and it's mostly 'sit in your room and think about what you've done' or go and hug the wall and stay there. They hate the silence and contemplation because they're usually very very active and like jumping around.

This smack happened at about 3-4 years old and 3 years later, teacher called me to ask if I smack with stick,I said nope but ages ago, I smacked bottom.

I don't know what they asked in school and my child was innocently recounting this thing like it was yesterday meanwhile it was feather bum smack not naija full on spine cracker on the back.

Imagine how he would have felt if we had continued? For me, it signified the impact it had on him.

Children can be really naughty and test us as parents. They love you and don't want to hurt you by their actions, i find that discussing their actions and the impact it has, makes them feel very very sorry, if I don't accept the sorry, they feel like the world is falling down.

They are all very different,when we take time to know them and speak their language, we are able to decipher methods to discipline that don't necessarily have to be smacking. You know where it pains, press the button hard.

I was more scared of disappointing my parents and more affected by their words so the beatings were not that much.. My siblings that were beaten like criminals didn't benefit at all, in fact a few got worse.

Know your child and be very very careful here so you don't get targeted.This is the law on smacking :

It is illegal for a parent or carer to smack their own child unless it amounts to “reasonable punishment” – which is assessed by taking into account the child’s age and the force of the smack 

Scotland has banned it( you can't even pull ears,pinch or pick pin) , Wales to follow suit in 2022.England will join soon.

Scotland :Parents could face prosecution for any use of physical punishment on their children. Physical punishment is defined in this instance as:

smacking,slapping and smacking with a hand or an implement,kicking, shaking or throwin,scratching, pinching, biting,pulling hair or boxing ears,forcing children to stay in uncomfortable positions,burning, scalding,forced ingestion.


Stay conscious of your limits, best of all check your emotion when that hand is shaking.. Count to 10 and see if you will act differently.

I know I can raise strong, respectful, loving, productive kids without opting for quick remedy..


I have never flogged.. I don't know how parents can manage inflicting constant pain like this.. Ordinary smack on bum felt like hell.. Flogging .. I just cannot.

Aprokodaughter:


Most people that make this statement are greedy and selfish (generally not you Biko) .

Because what have Africans gained from this flogging and beating kids like drum.

We still experience killings, robbery, ritual killings, kidnapping, corruption and election violence.

African kids are very tamed every little thing they have inferiority complex some can't even think for themselves (I did not say everyone before someone will read my comment upside down).

Every child should be treated differently. Beating has not solved anything some Africans(Nigerians especially don't like take corrections is the beating that makes some behave like that?)

Some Nigerians they say the beating shaped their life small thing or misunderstanding Nigerians will start insulting your life because of a disagreement.

Is it the flogging that makes Africans behave like?

So many Parents have killed their children because of this Biblical verse.

Some Nigerian children have killed their parents because this religious verse.

Some Nigerian kids are so damaged that they will go to boarding house and start fighting and being violent.

Some people will applaud this behavior it's totally wrong.

Flogging has never helped. Pikin wey wan stubborn go stubborn just look for a way that will discipline the child effectively.

If you check the story that started this whole argument,you would see that the doctor flogged his son after the school called him that his son was becoming a bully to other children. The UK has a lot of bully cases in their schools . Bullying in Nigeria is found only in secondary schools where seniors exhibit seniority to the juniors . That is now on the decline.

My Nigerian neighbour was once of the opinion that children from Nigeria exhibit inferiority complex when they come to the UK. When I tried to probe further,being slow in speaking and not being fluent was mentioned as part of her basis of classifying inferiority. My answer is simple. Don't expect a Nigerian to speak English more than the British. English is a second language for us so it will be unfair to expect a new child from Nigeria to be that fast and fluent in speaking. In my field,when you listen very well to some of them speaking very fast,you realise that they have said rubbish and they speak very fast to try to confuse you instead of admitting that they don't know it. Get a British to come to Nigeria and be fluent in Igbo,Yoruba or Hausa .

Also,the Nigerian child is groomed to be silent when an adult is talking. That is not being timid. It is called respect.

My neighbours child will be 5 years soon. He can speak well and can name any pic shown. But still finding reading or spelling 3 letter words difficult when his counterparts in Nigeria in the so called substandard schools(not you ooo,talking about my neighbour who said Nigeria has only substandard nursery and primary schools) can already read to some extent aloud children novels.

oyoolima:
Long post alert:

It is important to understand your child and the child's personality.

Some children are severely wounded by words and would welcome spanking.

Some children would prefer to be talked to and would feel damaged and great resentment over being spanked.

When you want to spank, stop for a moment and check with your emotions.. Are you spanking because you are angry or are you spanking because of what the child has done?

A huge percentage of times, your spanking is done when your emotions are heightened, if you STOP and count to 10,would you still spank?

I was determined to use my default Naija method to raise my children. When I had my first, I did very very few light smacks on the bottom and threatened with wooden spoon(in their whole life, max 5-6 times) but I realised that each time, this particular child would be inconsolable and would be so fearful.

The effect was too much and unbearable for us as parents, we literally would sit and talk about it and would recount our emotional state, was it anger and the urge to expend that anger? Recounting the child's reaction caused us so much misery and we made a conscious decision to cease smacking completely between ages 3-4.

When sibling arrived, we applied same method. It is not easy at all when your hand is shaking with righteous indignation, begging for instant application of justice to the erring party particularly because of how we were raised.

We finessed time out and it's mostly 'sit in your room and think about what you've done' or go and hug the wall and stay there. They hate the silence and contemplation because they're usually very very active and like jumping around.

This smack happened at about 3-4 years old and 3 years later, teacher called me to ask if I smack with stick,I said nope but ages ago, I smacked bottom.

I don't know what they asked in school and my child was innocently recounting this thing like it was yesterday meanwhile it was feather bum smack not naija full on spine cracker on the back.

Imagine how he would have felt if we had continued? For me, it signified the impact it had on him.

Children can be really naughty and test us as parents. They love you and don't want to hurt you by their actions, i find that discussing their actions and the impact it has, makes them feel very very sorry, if I don't accept the sorry, they feel like the world is falling down.

They are all very different,when we take time to know them and speak their language, we are able to decipher methods to discipline that don't necessarily have to be smacking. You know where it pains, press the button hard.

I was more scared of disappointing my parents and more affected by their words so the beatings were not that much.. My siblings that were beaten like criminals didn't benefit at all, in fact a few got worse.

Know your child and be very very careful here so you don't get targeted.This is the law on smacking :

It is illegal for a parent or carer to smack their own child unless it amounts to “reasonable punishment” – which is assessed by taking into account the child’s age and the force of the smack 

Scotland has banned it( you can't even pull ears,pinch or pick pin) , Wales to follow suit in 2022.England will join soon.

Scotland :Parents could face prosecution for any use of physical punishment on their children. Physical punishment is defined in this instance as:

smacking,slapping and smacking with a hand or an implement,kicking, shaking or throwin,scratching, pinching, biting,pulling hair or boxing ears,forcing children to stay in uncomfortable positions,burning, scalding,forced ingestion.


Stay conscious of your limits, best of all check your emotion when that hand is shaking.. Count to 10 and see if you will act differently.

I know I can raise strong, respectful, loving, productive kids without opting for quick remedy..


I have never flogged.. I don't know how parents can manage inflicting constant pain like this.. Ordinary smack on bum felt like hell.. Flogging .. I just cannot.

Very detailed and enlightening. Thanks for sharing your experience and your measures at home.

famzynet:


If you check the story that started this whole argument,you would see that the doctor flogged his son after the school called him that his son was becoming a bully to other children. The UK has a lot of bully cases in their schools . Bullying in Nigeria is found only in secondary schools where seniors exhibit seniority to the juniors . That is now on the decline.

My Nigerian neighbour was once of the opinion that children from Nigeria exhibit inferiority complex when they come to the UK. When I tried to probe further,being slow in speaking and not being fluent was mentioned as part of her basis of classifying inferiority. My answer is simple. Don't expect a Nigerian to speak English more than the British. English is a second language for us so it will be unfair to expect a new child from Nigeria to be that fast and fluent in speaking. In my field,when you listen very well to some of them speaking very fast,you realise that they have said rubbish and they speak very fast to try to confuse you instead of admitting that they don't know it. Get a British to come to Nigeria and be fluent in Igbo,Yoruba or Hausa .

Also,the Nigerian child is groomed to be silent when an adult is talking. That is not being timid. It is called respect.

My neighbours child will be 5 years soon. He can speak well and can name any pic shown. But still finding reading or spelling 3 letter words difficult when his counterparts in Nigeria in the so called substandard schools(not you ooo,talking about my neighbour who said Nigeria has only substandard nursery and primary schools) can already read to some extent aloud children novels.

What about Japanese or Chinese that don't speak English at all,but in the UK they are very outspoken. They don't care whether they are making mistake as long they air their views. So saying English is our second language is a lame excuse.

Yes, grooming someone to be silence is a major characteristics of being timid.

Even your argument you are still using harsh words like rubbish instead of putting out your point in clear terms. You don't have to use such words.

What we are saying is flogging and beating wont make any great changes.

I disagree with your statement that it's only secondary school bullying takes places. Have you visited pre-school in Nigeria or nursery schools. It might not be violent but they bullying themselves even at young age.

I taught young kids some bully their mates. Imagine a child trying to play with another next thing is slap instead of talking or coming to me to report.

That's how bullying starts.

What about Don David? Just because students don't speak up doesn't mean it's has died down. If they call out students to speak about bullying my dear case no go end for court.


I hope you know abusive words could damage a child as well.

Finally, it's inferiority complex that makes Nigerians celebrate whenever a britian speaks igbo,hausa or yoruba. Even when we see them eating our food we celebrate all these are inferiority complex.

Just understand your child.

Famzynet,

The man beat the boy till he bled. He's just 10.
A ten year old is a baby in my eyes, there's sooo much room to teach him to be better.

There's a lot going on with him.. According to that website


They were summoned to their son's primary school after the boy got into trouble for not submitting homework and lying to other pupils to seek attention.


On the day of the incident itself the boy - named as Child A - had been facing expulsion for swearing, using the word 'rape' and stamping on an injured girl during a PE lesson.

This boy is violent and shows no empathy.. A normal child will not stamp on an injured person, this child is also swearing at his young age.. There must be a lot going on and this is a 2 parent home o where it's likely that they are sparing the rod..

Where has he learned this?Is it possible that he is acting how he's being treated at home?

We will never know.. Hopefully there's still a lot of time for a reset and healing for them all.

Braket:

Thank you for these explanations.

But from what I understand,you don't get to do the valuation of the property until you have placed a bid and it has been offered.

The only way I have been checking the prices is by using the data gotten on Zoopla or right move coupled with ourproperty.co.uk.

Or I'm I mistaken?

Yes I would say this Is correct.... the historical property prices in that area can guide you and you can try by offering 10 percent less and see if they say no... but never go overly over or involve in a bidding war.

wallg123:

What is this one talking about

Not to start an argument but the assertions are clearly stated in your writeup.

Chreze:
Abeg this siren wey de blow almost every hour, shey na COVID patient them be, because the thing de sometimes make me fear for doctors and what they are going thru. I wonder why people don’t want to take this COVID seriously.

Chreze:


There is one opposite my house. They don’t let someone enter inside, I watch them from my window, the lady will just collect or give a note and the person goes back. I will go there tomorrow and see how it goes.

Na them de make the COVID thing very very real to me. And the ambulance that drives pass almost every hour with that sound reminder of what is happening.

You're asking why people are not taking COVID seriously but you didn't believe the virus being real until something changed?

Disclaimer: I don’t have a kid yet. This is just my experience.

On the issue of spanking.

Kid’s will grow up and turn out how they’re destined to turn out. Whopped or not. No region has the monopoly to dredges in the community. This is sorely dependent on the environment. The poorer the society, the more crimes it breeds. If you like flog fire.

I was opportune to grow up in a yard. So I’ve seen first class what it effects are.
Papa KC is always quick to anger, so KC always got legendary whoop a***s. He developed a tough hind after years. So, it was natural he fought his father during one of those sessions. KC was a good kid, he just needed patience and understanding.

Me on the other hand, I never forgot my first WhoopA... my crime, I came 20 out of 39 one term like that. Let’s just say I’m always top five the rest of my academic life. However I was bugging that term. For some reason I felt and believed all my classmates were smarter and I couldn’t compete. I hated maths. I knew I needed something to pull me out that rot or tell me otherwise. My mum’s “agña” sure provided it.

Pops is not a fan of WA. He’ll rather have The Talk with you than lay his hands on you. I hated the talk. I never made the same mistake again after The Talk. Mum on the other side loves her assorted whoop weapons.

In summary, the two is essential to moulding a child’s behaviour from that young age. Above all, knowledge is key. Why you did something that was unacceptable and the impact it had on people around you. “Is this what you want your junior ones to copy” “this family has a reputation. Don’t drag it through the mud” etc etc etc.

We also had roles and responsibilities as kids. No one renegades on theirs. From head to last born. We understood responsibility and owning up to one’s shortfalls and asking for help were we struggling.

Also, we only ever get to see our parents morning before they left for work and at night when they returned. Then weekends some.

So the eldest done the cooking, someone done the laundry, another cleaned the house and last born washed plates.

We weren’t saints as kid’s but we turned out fine cause we knew to always think things through.


If I decide to have kids, I’ll whoop them, have the talk with them and keep them very busy and engaged. That’s the formula I hope to adopt.

Thanks for reading

famzynet:


I disagree with you. Spare the rod and spoil the child said the wisest man that ever lived. As a child,I received correct flogging. It shaped me into whom I am today. I see better behaved children in Nigeria than in the UK.

Really ? Is that why most young adults are pathological liars can never own up to the truth? You call that well behaved? Ok no problem

Inkredible:
Disclaimer: I don’t have a kid yet. This is just my experience.

On the issue of spanking.

Kid’s will grow up and turn out how they’re destined to turn out. Whopped or not. No region has the monopoly to dredges in the community. This is sorely dependent on the environment. The poorer the society, the more crimes it breeds. If you like flog fire.

I was opportune to grow up in a yard. So I’ve seen first class what it effects are.
Papa KC is always quick to anger, so KC always got legendary whoop a***s. He developed a tough hind after years. So, it was natural he fought his father during one of those sessions. KC was a good kid, he just needed patience and understanding.

Me on the other hand, I never forgot my first WhoopA... my crime, I came 20 out of 39 one term like that. Let’s just say I’m always top five the rest of my academic life. However I was bugging that term. For some reason I felt and believed all my classmates were smarter and I couldn’t compete. I hated maths. I knew I needed something to pull me out that rot or tell me otherwise. My mum’s “agña” sure provided it.

Pops is not a fan of WA. He’ll rather have The Talk with you than lay his hands on you. I hated the talk. I never made the same mistake again after The Talk. Mum on the other side loves her assorted whoop weapons.

In summary, the two is essential to moulding a child’s behaviour from that young age. Above all, knowledge is key. Why you did something that was unacceptable and the impact it had on people around you. “Is this what you want your junior ones to copy” “this family has a reputation. Don’t drag it through the mud” etc etc etc.

We also had roles and responsibilities as kids. No one renegades on theirs. From head to last born. We understood responsibility and owning up to one’s shortfalls and asking for help were we struggling.

Also, we only ever get to see our parents morning before they left for work and at night when they returned. Then weekends some.

So the eldest done the cooking, someone done the laundry, another cleaned the house and last born washed plates.

We weren’t saints as kid’s but we turned out fine cause we knew to always think things through.


If I decide to have kids, I’ll whoop them, have the talk with them and keep them very busy and engaged. That’s the formula I hope to adopt.

Thanks for reading

You are right to some extent. My dad never beat me and maybe once or twice in my life I got a whoop with my mum’s wooden spoon. Generally my parents talked to me when I got out of line and I felt so bad when I disappointed them. That disappointed look was enough for me and I understand that it doesn’t work for all kids.
Violently beating up a kid until you bruise them is not discipline, like you said some of those kid’s end up fighting their parents when to grow up and resentment sets in in some cases. There are so many ways by taking away what they cherish e.g tv, games, playing with friends, gifts , naughty steps. Parents that beat their kids have no patience and have a problem themselves.