₦airaland Forum

greencard:
Oga oo
Things deh happen

Things dey happen, my brother.

greencard:
Actually, on the contrary, every one is responsible for each of their own actions..no matter the gender involved..each must take responsibility of their actions

I like this.

Bestinstinct:
Exactly! It's just pure immaturity.

It is, bro.

Mikester:
Most girls are just shallow and stupid. That girl and most girls like her are just shameless.


As if men need more reasons to fear marriage.

May virgins like me not have them as wives.

Amen, fire. May we never even encounter them on our marital journey.

StacyO:
Nawa

But op, indirectly,are you telling us you're a virgin??



I'm juss asking ooo, dazall.



Iz jus a kwesion ooo

Correct. And I plan to remain one, for long.

DaInferno:
where do some people keep there conciousness, self esteem, self value and and empathy. Kai, the dude no try at all.

Bro, consciousness, self-esteem, self value and empathy are all defunct virtues in our societies today. They do not exist anymore, especially amongst the growing number of youths.

It is tiring.

StacyO:
It's not the dudes fault.

I do not not disagree. It takes two to tan...

DaInferno:
he isn't entirely out of the mess up still, how come you take a rich girl who presumably needs someone that can teach her one or two about life and mess her up that bad. I advice my girlfriend atimes, and am surprised at the fact that she doesn't have an idea at all about the topic if not that I just mentioned it.

if the dude can't advice her to go home when due, fk her sideways day after day, eat her money and food, I cringed when I read "the dude requested for sodomy" ,no wonder she can't walk well.. mehn, u can't tell me it ain't his fault. would he be happy if the same was mented on his own daughter?
and the parents on the other hand, be thinking they had a decent "teenage Daughter" they didn't check up on

This is on point. Very accurate.

StacyO:
They're both at fault if you ask me.




The girl to be precise even after all such ill treatments couldn't leave the guy.
I know sometimes, love can mess up someone's sense of reasoning.
But,in this case I don't think I'll blame anyone in particular.

Though the guy in question seems quite heartless to begin with though.

So apt!!

Maryjane001:
I just hope u get this much joy wen it happens to ur sister or some gal u close with. Let's just learn to condemn evil abeg. Call a spade a spade.

God bless you. I love the call-a-spade-a-spade part.

StacyO:
Are you male or female??

Can't believe this is coming from a guy on nairaland.



Let's assuming the op was human enough,why wasn't he able to speak senses into the girl?

Regardless knowing what love(infatuation) did to her.



The did has already been done.
Why I believe that we should all be more tolerant of each other.

We all have our shortcomings but,using that against one another is exactly what op and his friend did.


Yes. Op is guilty as well

Were logs plucked into your eyes while reading that you didn't see the extreme infatuation part? It'd have just ended in a truce while I'd be at the centre of their midnight jokes while they caress each other's bosoms, later.

Abeg Abeg, don't even bring my own into this at all. Exornorate me in whatever tantrum you want to throw. We both wouldn't like exchanging hot words with eachother.

illicit:
Well....

I think u envy day guy, he was getting it and u were not

Envy? Me? Ladies are the littlests of my concerns right now, at least for the next ten years.

DaInferno:
I agree with your last words.
am a dude to the bone and will continue to be long afterwards... I'm already guessing u asked because of what's being portrayed here by most guys all day, but a good sum of us still know it's important to reason from a "perspective" , that been said: am not totally leaving op out of it cus one thing people hardly understand is; sometimes, you can't advice every neighbor, you just gotta mind your business for your own peace sake, especially during your NYSC so you don't get into trouble- am not saying he shouldn't have adviced them though, cus I would!. Besides he mentioned how futile it would be to talk to them, (her in particular)
but then again, am making emphasis directly on the story... so I say Kay fcked up. He's the one who had the powers to pull the plug

God bless you bro. In fact, One of the lessons life has taught me, as young as I am, is: You cannot advise these two set of people:
1. A woman in love
2. A woman in love

StacyO:
So to say,I wouldn't have said it any better.

Maybe, nairaland isn't that bad afterall.
Thank you for your time.











@Sammmyyyy marriage doesn't favour women more than it favours men. Please,do change that mentality.
And yes, virginity doesn't gaurantee you a good wife but,it sure does have some advantages.



I still don't really get the motive or point behind this topic anyway.

Perspective. You see it that way but I don't! A handful people have grasped the motive. I am glad.

Bola146:
And what should we derive from this? I don't understand

Don't let any man used you financially and sexually

LikeAking:
Tell us your own sex story @ OP.

None. Completely none. I've been an extreme introvert, hence terrible with girls. The last and only one I tried went south, that was when I decided to shut the door of my heart and focus more on myself.

PRETTYPRINCES:
All the blame is on the lady in love but not on Kay whose CONSCIENCE is totally dead. Kay will be out there tomorrow searching for a VIRGIN lol and yet won't still stick to the THIGHT HOLE if he ever finds one. And may end up committing suicide if his found THIGHT HOLE gets eaten by another dog behind his back, a way of karma.

Hmn...

WoundedLamb:
This is exactly the reaction the OP wants. I hope he's happy. As if it's not a woman that will still marry the Kay guy. Men go around sleeping with anything female and turn around to complain there's no virgin to marry, how is that even logical? Will the virgins fall from heaven?

This statement reeks outrighly of folly and proves how ludicrous and slow you are at making right deductions. Me? Happy? You suck!

For clarity, what I aim to prove is certainly on bride price, and how the society mandates that the man pays, without considering the surrounding circumstances as to whether it is worth paying or not.

Liposure:
When a girl is drunk in love like beyonce, there is nothing you can do to save her. This is why some ladies would commit suicide over a guy. So many ladies have wasted their youth simply because they refuse to heed to warnings and advice. Tomorrow one god fearing man will inherit them as wives and soulmates.

God bless you, bro. This is my point exactly. You will only make a laughing mannequin of yourself if you advise ladies like that.

May we not inherit such.

If you see the way undergraduate ladies live on campus, you may never want to have anything called marriage with them.

Sammmyyyy:
This statement reeks outrighly of folly and proves how ludicrous and slow you are at making right deductions. Me? Happy? You suck!

For clarity, what I aim to prove is certainly on bride price, and how the society mandates that the man pays, without considering the surrounding circumstances as to whether it is worth paying or not.

You can curse from here to your grave, it doesn't move me any bit sir. If you want to talk about societal menace, try to be unbiased. Your write-up torchlights the female gender while closing your eyes to the other party. At the end, it is the men that sleep with these women that will go around looking for decent wives to marry when they are ready. Bride price is materialistic and intangible in most places so basing your stance on who pays bride price does not only create a soft landing for the men but also waters down the seriousness of the issue. I am a man and we all must take responsibility for our actions. No gender is better off.

Sammmyyyy:
Trust me, hers is worse than a simp's. I just feel it is immaturity and youthful gra gra.

An inexperienced lady should not date a guy who is older than her by such a wide margin

My conclusion OP is a virgin and still a small boy to be looking for virgin.


When you fall in love dear all you can do is love your woman and move on.

Concerning the bride price, you are paying for the present value not the past value. It's just like a football player, who keeps increasing in value and experience as time goes on. Compared to when he was young lol

anochuko01:
Na wa oo!
As tall as I am, I'm short of words.

Parents need to make sure their children are well groomed with certain cultures instilled in them before they are allowed to leave for higher institution. The ones who gain admission at early ages should be put in care of campus fellowship leaders and also given close marking. Na wetin save people like me be that... Our life for no get meaning today.

How are you sure campus fellow whatever will not mess them up?

Sammmyyyy:
I write this, sequel to a thread I read here a few days ago (precisely on Valentine's Day), on why people should preserve themselves and remain virgins till marriage.
After seeing the thread, my mind swayed right directly to the sayings of some men on this forum, on the opinion that marriage only favours the woman and not the man; then I tried connecting the dots.

That same day, my mind led me back to around a year ago while I was still serving. I rented a self-con, next to a young bar attendant of around 28 years, let's call him Kay. It was a twin flat, so we shared the same veranda and our rooms were very close.
This guy had a very young, charming, moderately rich, perfectly shaped, extremely slender, dark girl staying with him. Let's call her Joy. I'd later discover she was in 200L studying nursing but couldn't go home during the Corona, so, lied to her parents she was held in the school hostel instead.

In all honesty, I do not know her age, but my instinct told me she couldn't be more than 19. I even tried spying on her facebook account but couldn't get her exact age.

Guys, not to bore you, Kay and this girl, Joy, have sex more than they talk to each other. There is no day, no single day, I will not hear her whimpers in my room. It is not exaggeration if I say that no day passed without them having sex. They copulate so much that, at a time, the girl's walking posture changed. Her legs were not as free and slender as they used to.

Not just the sex. This girl spends anyhow for Kay. I got to later discover that she's the only child of her rich parents, so they never allow her lack anything.

In fact, I also learnt that the iPhone this guy, Kay, uses was bought by Joy as a birthday gift for him.
This guy would copulate roughly with the girl before leaving for work in the morning and roughly again when he comes back at night. Even midnights weren't left out as I occasionally would need to put up my speaker's volume just to distract me. And surprisingly again, this girl must cook for him before he comes back, from her own money.

Another shocking thing about this was, I have witnessed on more than 4 occasions, whenever we sit outside to gist, especially on weekends, this guy would say it openly that he cannot marry her, and that she should go and cook the rubbish she was making for him in her husband's house. That only her future husband deserves salty rice, hard beef, blah blah blah and not him. The girl too would just sit there, laughing sheepily.

I have also witnessed on one or two occasions, where this guy would throw this girl out at night on frivolous grounds. On one night after he had thrown her out and I had begged that he please allow her in, I heard their faint chatters on how that he wasn't enjoying her again, and that he needed something tighter, hence suggested sodomy. (I lie you not.)

At a time, I couldn't stand the excruciating agony Kay was putting this girl through that I wanted to sit her down and talk some sense into her, but it'd have been a waste. This girl is completely in love, or shall I say, foolishly in love, with him.

This act continued so long, until I finished my service there, packed my things and left the state.

My good people of nairaland, I can categorically say that this guy, Kay, milked this girl financially and sexually. Trust me, that girl has no sexual sweetness anymore. I just feel sorry for whoever her future husband will be. You know after you bite into a sugar cane and then spit it out after squeezing and enjoying its sweetness? That's what Kay has done to that girl.

....

Now, where's the connection?

Imagine if a girl like that who, at her tender age, has wasted her sexual prowess gets picked by a God fearing virgin man of God and is given an exorbitant bride price to pay?

Back in school, I have witnessed girls get laid with as low as Sharwarma and Vanilla ice cream.
Imagine a lady loses her virginity for ordinary meat pie and Bigi Chapman, and when the time for marriage comes, the prospective suitor is given over 200, 000 to pay as bride price.

Well, as for me. I have never messed anyone's child up.

And God is my witness, if she isn't a virgin, I will never drop a naira as pride price. Even a kobo like this, I will not pay.
The only reason I will marry a non virgin is if she'll pay my bride price, then I can reconsider.

In all honestly, I can say that marriage favours only the woman and not the man.

which state did this happen?

idu1:
How are you sure campus fellow whatever will not mess them up?

I spent four good years there and there was never a report of such case, and that's something you'll hardly get outside.

I am not saying it can never happen but the chances are very few and it'll surely not be a case of such dehumanization and exploitation as narrated by the OP. I got into school at age 18 with some funny intentions but ended up graduating as a better person, so you can tell how much they guided me through my stay on campus.

Sammmyyyy:
Were logs plucked into your eyes while reading that you didn't see the extreme infatuation part? It'd have just ended in a truce while I'd be at the centre of their midnight jokes while they caress each other's bosoms, later.

Abeg Abeg, don't even bring my own into this at all. Exornorate me in whatever tantrum you want to throw. We both wouldn't like exchanging hot words with eachother.

You can't exchange words with me.

That won't be feasible enough.


Bye.

luminouz:
Are you not resident in Nigeria or how come you made that opening line?

You are totally wrong. Even stacyO may think otherwise but it's the truth. Marriage favours women than men.

Explain how it favours women more.

Judybash93:
Okay. So, your assumption is based on personal experience. It's not enough but it can't be ignored as well.
Well, the difference between those who are exposed and not exposed is mostly revealed in their utterances. People will come online and just make claims without any evidence to back them up. I cringe whether i see such and that can also be linked to how we demonize others for merely existing. "Nigerian men are cheats" "Nigerian when are useless" .... Like WTF

Yes. I comment based on facts most of the time.




Anyway,I've equally seen things like
"Nigerian women are useless,all of them"

And it's way worse than the former.

Maryjane001:
May karma catch up with him wherever he is. How can someone be that heartless na??....

Ladies don't learn or wiseup till their hearts has been played.. The nice n real ones are seen as fools, youthful exploration. She has gotten her share. But who knows maybe karma is wimping the girl too.

The fundamentals of family upbringing is severely lacking in the young lady.
It just shows you that riches doesn't translate to character and this is our greatest undoing!
Her parents gave her wealth but no sense of direction in life...no value, no disernment...and I'm sure they don't know!
God help us to be really good parents following the injunction of the Bible. Proverbs 22:6