₦airaland Forum

Vinnie2000:
OP, Number 7 is on point.

When you ROMANTICALLY HARASS a lady to an Extreme extent, some of Them will begin to Fall for you.

Nazgul:
Your number 1 and your number 4 contradicts each other.

Besides whenever you want to copy and paste a romance article, look for one written by a Nigerian. That way your points would be more realistic and easily understood.

Godada:



For a relationship to work, there is need for authenticity.

I have a very good friend. When we started it was awkward. But she responded with the same energy that I was giving her.........

If you enter a relationship with games in mind, it could go south.....

okunwaye:
sharrap ewedu miscreant them no born hausa man to claim anything for igbo land

intruder15:
You clearly don't have a child yet. When you are married and have your first child, we can then revisit this quote.

Wotowotoman:
It is a PUA site. It has been around for several years..

Wotowotoman:
Now tell me this is not one of the blogs that these idiots that claim to be successful with women get their contents from.

millie0:
cc pukkalolo and others, please come to my aid

millie0:
Long Post Alert;

Please pardon the multiple grammatical errors and disorganization, i wrote this with difficulty in my heart. Please read it and advice me.
Hello everybody. Happy New Year.

I'm in a dilemma and I need help. I have been feeling down and almost depressed for the past few days.

There's this girl that I met in school last semester. I go to a university in the US. So, I met her in like September. It was a school event and someone introduced us together. She's mixed, Nigerian and Asian (blasian). She's also relatively tall and she's older than me. She'll be 22 this year and I just turned 19 a few days ago. but i told her i was 21 as well She's also noticeably taller than me. She was a first year student and I'm in a higher year (or should be).

When I met her, we just introduced ourselves and talked for a few minutes. I told her I was 18 then when she told me my age but she kinda forgot down the line. But basically I saw she was kind of attractive but I was not really interested. I didn't even try to get her socials or anything.

A week or two later, I was on campus and came to the residence dorms because I was bored. It was night and I lived in apartment off campus. I met her in the lobby of a building and she was leaving to go to her room. This was around midnight or past midnight. I decided to go to her room with her but I didn't ask directly. I just told her to use her keys to open the common lounge for me so we walked to her part of the residence and she opened the lounge. Some people were inside and I was like there's too many people. So we came out and I found myself walking to her building. We got in and she took me to her room, offered me drinks of my choice ( I picked shots of vodka), and we both took shots while we chatted. I didn't want to make a move because I was nervous and it was the first time. I left to my apartment later. But I got her snap here.

I didn't put too much interest in the situation because at first I genuinely wasn't that interested. We met again during another event and I sat beside her and we talked. She vapes and I picked up the habit during the summer so we vaped as well when we were in her room. I noticed that she asked me about two or three times to go buy vapes together. I wanted to go but I was kind of broke back then and also I wasn't sure if those were signals (how wrong i was). But basically, i kind of turned her down. I just told her how to get it because it was a new town for her as a first year while I've been schooling there for some time.

Skip, skip.... we were sending snaps and she sent me pictures of shots she was having. I asked her where mine was and she responded and said "COME!!!!!" enthusiastically. i was like okay, I'm in. So, I went to her to her room and took some more alcohol and she showed me some videos on her computer and we talked about a bunch of things. She even asked what kind of girls I was interested in and all that. I knew that I should have made a move on her but I was shy and nervous (story of my life).

i'll back track here to give you some background info. I've always been a nice guy with girls for the most part. I have these idea that they are like innocent and I should take things very slow with them. But, on average despite being short I've not had problems getting girls attracted to me. I always seem to Bleep things up though. Also, my first experience with a girl in uni in my first year went badly so I had some kind of trauma that I needed to unpack. Basically, it was the first time i got high off weed and it was with this girl in her room. I tried making a move when we were under the covers watching a show on her laptop but she removed my hand from her thighs the first time and I freaked out. I started imagining sexual assault charges and I actually started pleading with her in the room. She was giving me reassurances but the effect of being high amplified everything in my head. I couldn't leave my room for three days because I told she told everyone i tried to rape her. it was fine at the end though, she didn't tell anyone but that bleeped me up for a long time. i was always afraid to make a move on girls because i didn't want to come off as creepy and all. There was also another girl i used to hang out with. we'll be on my bed or hers watching but i never made a move or tried even though i wanted to.

Also, I used to watch a lot of porn and became insecure about my dick. erect size is 5'7 inches and 4'7 in girth. I always thought it would be too small and thin and girls would be dissapointed. so that also factored into my insecurity and anxiety.


Back to where I was. So, after about four hours in her room (yes, i know i was such a pussy) she made the first move. She faced me and put her legs in between mine and was basically giving me the greenest green light ever. In my head, i was like okay she wants it. so i put my hands on her thighs and started caressing it. after some time she went to her bed and called me to her bed. she told me to come to the bed. I laid beside her and after some time we started kissing and making out. at some point she went on top of me and was rubbing her pussy against my dick but we were wearing clothes. i was also a virgin too so i wasn't confident to have sex because I knew i would be rusty and coupled with my insecurity too. but we basically made out for a while and i touched her and all but we didn't have sex. i think she tried giving me a Mouth Action but i didn't react so she didn't do much. i was still insecure about my dick size and that's why i didn't whip it out.

I left and I went back to tell my best friend about it. he was saying i finally scored some and said he was happy for me and all. we're actually very close and share almost everything with each other, we share texts with girls we're talking to, ask for advice and run strategies and all. we talk about everything and everyone knows we're close. i'll link this later on.

So, i found out that i wouldn't be able to take classes for last semester because i had some unpaid tuition debt. so, i would be going to the nearby city to stay with a family friend until the fees were paid i could register for classes. this was last semester (september to december). i told her about it and i was sad because i actually to spend more time with her in school and all. she told me to stay a few more days and i did but i left finally.

i should have seen the signs, she drinks a lot of alcohol and has daddy issues. she actually hates her father. this will make sense soon.

i visited her twice while she was in school. i came to campus to meet her the first time. at first, she said nothing would happen but i still wanted to come cos i felt something would happen. And if nothing happened, i would just hang out with my other friends.

when i came i told her i wanted to see her. at first she said only in the day time and in a public place lol but at night when i texted her i told her i wanted to come see her. she went drinking with some friends but i later met her room and we hung out in her room and she gave me some weed that she bought. we got high and had sex that night. i think it wasn't special and i didn't do a fantastic job. i even couldn't come but i think she liked it because when we talked the following morning she said she enjoyed it.

but before i left, she told me we have to stop having sex and all that because she wanted to focus on another guy (he's taller and has beards and she likes beards, i don't have beards). she did tell me when we first kissed that she kissed another guy and that was him. i was surprised but i just assumed that maybe the sex wasn't good enough. i didn't tell her i was a virgin and i told her my body count was like 4.

When she said that to me, i was like okay. i told her my real age was 18 and she said she felt like i liked her and she didn't want to lead me on. she was interested in someone else. she was surprised about my real age but she said it was fine that her best friend that was the same age had a boyfriend who was 19 too.

i left and went back to the other city. we were still talking on imessage and facetime. and i discovered that things didn't go too well with the other guy because she kept telling me she was single and nothing happened.

So some weeks later she asked me to come see her. she wanted me to come and i said okay and i made some time. i came and we had sex again but i think this was worse than the first time. i was very lethargic and i didn't last very long. it seemed like she was disappointed and i tried going for a second round but i was too lazy and ended up not doing it. she wore her clothes and we slept together (we've slept together like three times). the following morning, after disturbing her sleep lol we did it again but i didn't last very long again. i was angry with myself but i knew it was a mental thing and also because i didn't have much experience. i knew if i was on campus with her taking classes and seeing her frequently the sex would be much better because there would be room for improvement and learning since we'd do it multiple times. but just doing it once in while places more importance on the sex and for me to deliver. i was honestly inexperienced and still insecure about my dick. we did it raw the two times i had sex with her too (thought i'd mention that). when i was leaving i asked if we'd still have more sex cos i remember the last time when she said we wouldn't but we ended up doing it again. she said yes.

another thing concerning the sex was that she liked me fingering her and she stops me multiple times when i do it because she says she doesn't want to squirt and mess the sheets. she also told me she likes rough sex and being submissive, dirty talk and all that. she even calls me daddy when we have sex but because i'm inexperienced and was a virgin before i met her it's not easy to do all that. i treat her gently and give her the girlfriend treatment but i think it's the nice guy in me. it was hard for me to treat her roughly but now i realize my mistakes. i remember telling her that at first i thought she was innocent but she laughed and said no. i also told her i liked bdsm and there's a chance that i would do it when next we Bleep.

Now, the point of this post is that she is dating my best friend now. i don't know how to feel. he knew every single thing about me and her but he still made a move. he's said he wanted to hit her but i didn't expect them to be dating. i know all this is happening because i wasn't in school so i barely even knows what goes on. to be fair, i didn't tell my best friend i liked her but even if he shouldn't have gone behind my back to date her. i don't even know how long he's been planning this behind my back and he didn't even tell me they were dating. usually if it was any other girl i would know but he kept quiet about this one and stopped talking to me much.

i noticed something was off but i didn't know this was the reason. and also her, i remember when she used to tell me when my best friend would hit on her but she told me she was never interested. there was even a time when she asked me if she should accept his invite to watch a movie in his apartment and i said no. but at the end of the day, we weren't dating so she's free to do whatever but it still hurts. she didn't know that he (my bf) knew about us having sex but the guy knew and still went to Bleep her and cuff her. This is soemone that used to advice me on how to move to her and all that. No, it hurts like hell. I used to consider this guy my blood and i trust him becuase since i'm not in school he's with my ps5 and tv. that's how much i trust him. we tell each other everything (him more than me tbh) but i can't believe he would do this. i haven't even talked to him about it and i don't know if i should. i asked him and he said they are dating but he never goes into detail.

another sad thing is that i can't come to school this semester as well becuase i have unpaid fees but they would be paid before next session in september. so, it makes sense if she's fucking someone else especially since i'm not around in school. I'm in the UK with my family now and I have to stay for about four/five months before going back to the US in the summer but it's like hell because that's all i think about. and since i'm with my parents and can't really talk to other girls i can't move on. i'm stuck with these thoughts.

like why did she have to date my best friend (she knew we were close), it would have been any one else and i wouldn't have cared as much and the guy is a snake because he knew about all my movements with the girl and still did this. he knew my intimate details about the sex with her and still made a move. when i told the girl about how he knew we were fucking, she said it was her fault for going for best friends and she was ass. Basically, she's sticking with him. I wish I was in school because this wouldn't have happened. It's all because I'm not in school but I'll be back in a few months.

At this point, i need advice on multiple things:

1. I'm tired of being a nice guy and insecure. I want to be more confident and improve my frame. Some girls i've messed with in the past say I'm too emotional and can't be a fuckbody because I attach emotions to it. This blasian girl said something similar, she said i was a loverboy. She's also told me to be more confident, stop second guessing myself and when we text, and i get pissed or something she says i act like a girl.

I need to stop being this nice guy. How do I erase it from the fabric of my soul because I've struggled with it for years and it has hindered me multiple times. That's also why I couldn't Bleep her the way she wanted even after she told me.

2. How do I improve my sex game? Genuinely like how to Bleep (do we use the waist/hips to control thrusts or it's the full body) properly. How do I last longer and get better erections ( I know this is cliche but i need something that works for you), how do i stop being insecure about my dick size (already told you measurements earlier)? But, if i bleeped her three times, that means it should be fine. I want to get good sex game so when i Bleep a girl she would always want me back.

3. How do I handle this situation? She was asking me how to make me feel better and asking if i was mad when she told me she was dating him. at first i thought it was a joke but they are serious but not too many people know about it. i messed up yesterday and let my emotions get a hold of me and i blocked her. but i unblocked her and she started acting angry to me and cold but i apologized. i've been acting needy though and doing too much and she complained today so I said i'll back off. if she doesn't text me first, i'll talk to her when i get back to the US in a few months. I'll still see my best friend (or ex best-friend) when I come back because we have the same friend groups and I can't avoid him.

4. How do I remedy this situation and still Bleep her again? I know it sounds stupid but my mind is made up. She's my first and she was actually good and I enjoy spending time with her when we Bleep. i don't necessarily want to date her but at least I still want to hit that. Also, it's a matter of pride to me because if they're still dating when i come back and i can Bleep her while she's dating some of my hurt will reduce. Also, i know i'm attached to her but I also want to right my wrongs and give her mind blowing sex to redeem myself and my sanity. How do I remedy the situation and still keep her on the cards? To be honest, even if you say not to try to Bleep her my mind is made up. I have to try at least, so please advice me accordingly.

5. How do I stop being emotional and acting like a girl. I react to things too much, take things personally and I'm insecure.

6. How can I keep myself sane and stop thinking about it? It's hurting my soul and staying here for months basically doing nothing is going to be torture for me?

7. Give me some general advice about game? How do I improve and go on from here.

Please I need comprehensive responses, I don't need a band aid on my wound but a full body surgery. I want to change this few months I'm here before I go back.

Thank you again for reading and forgive the errors and improper structure. I've been writing straight for two hours.

Lifeinlight:
Same way they're throwing you guys out abroad, why you come to social media to cry wolf

Lifeinlight:
Reason why some women dey show men like you pepper for abroad. No any iota of sense

I pity the unfortunate woman that'd end up with you.

EmeeNaka:
hopefully, it retains the historic dirty gutters and archaic infrastructures.

OVB123:
Yoruba and brown roofs are like 5 and 6.