₦airaland Forum

[quote author=echo- bee link=topic=382850.msg5353286#msg5353286 date=1263987729]my guy u try.why are u disturbed about her,u still have 10 more girls[/quote]haha
well true talk nothing to lose 11-1 = 10
let her go or you can even love-vendor her

16

my guy u be something else o

ah wahala dey oo

It depends
If there is a time limit then its cool.,,,if not so help me God I am out

clap for yourself

gr8

take advantage

hmmmm
STORY

ALESH
mr biggs
Alpha beach

^^^^yea right

Now u open this because it says "American Visa".,,,,,,,,,sha sha.,,,,,,,,go away and read other real jokes. lol

A man was driving down the street, in a sweat, because he had an important meeting and couldn't find parking. Looking up toward heaven, he said, "Lord, take pity on me. If you find me a parking space, I will go to church every Sunday for the rest of my life and give up drinking."

Miraculously, a parking space appeared.

The man looked up again and said, "Never mind. I found one

another year has added, still not giving up, WAITING, for the right man, LOL

Eddie's first-grade class was having a game of Name That Animal. The teacher held up a picture of a cat and asked, "What animal is this?"
"A cat!" said Suzy.

"Good job! Now, what's this animal?"

"A dog!" said Ricky.

"Good! Now what animal is this?" she asked, holding up a picture of a deer.

The class fell silent. After a couple of minutes, the teacher said, "It's what your mom calls your dad."

"A Hot bastard!" called out Eddie

hehehehe

lol ;d ;d :d :d :d :d

thanx

something like this

http://www.remiandyinka.com/

Ejike3:
Wetin good for dis thing now? If na you be those cars and people come dey change the name wey your papa & mama give you, come dey give you yeye name, you go like am?

EJIKE3 Elede Jalo Ilu Kolo Eye (Meta)

warn yourself ooo

tokyo

where i am now

zxc erjklp

;d :d :d

Hello guys/ladies

Please I need a web guru to design a wedding wesite for me.

any ideas or recomendation
pls contact brialad@yahoo.com

show yourself ma guy

I won

Education in Institution from Federation to Masterbation on Stimulation = Escortion  

By Festus Owete


January 18, 2010 02:54AM print email





The office of the Auditor-General of the Federation (AGF) has indicted four Nigerian embassies abroad for not remitting monies they collected as visa fees and for other items to the federal treasury in 2008.

Consequently, it has asked the permanent secretary of the Federal Ministry of Foreign Affairs to explain the anomalies.

According to the 2008 Audit Report, which was forwarded to the National Assembly in October last year, the Nigerian embassy in Paris, France collected as revenue a total of N271,810,955.20, but did not remit the money to the federal government.

The 284-page report, which was signed by the acting Auditor General of the Federation, G.F Ogunshina, said the non-remittance contravenes Financial Regulation 302, which requires the issuance of Treasury Receipts by all Sub-standards or revenue collectors for all revenue collected by them. The report stated that the mission was instead issuing temporary receipts for revenues collected by them.

The report also said that the Nigerian Embassy in Lisbon, Portugal collected € 101,902.82 (N21,756,822.73) without remitting it, but instead spent the money, contrary to Financial Regulation 323.

On its part, the Embassy of Nigeria in Moscow generated US$94,819.00 (N138,443,515.16) as revenue from visa between January and December, 2008 but did not pay it into the treasury.

The report says: “Financial Regulation 412 stipulates that the authority conveyed to officers controlling votes by recurrent warrants is limited to the amounts provided under each subhead in the approved estimate and no expenditure on any subhead of the recurrent estimate in excess of the provision in the approved estimates may be authorized by any officer controlling a vote, without approval of the National Assembly which will be sought by means of an application for virement or supplementary provisions.

“Contrary to the above provision, the Nigeria Embassy, Moscow, Russia expended the sum of N227,822,248.84 in excess of the approved provision under the recurrent subheads of expenditure between 2006 and 2008 fiscal years. The permanent secretary has been informed of this anomaly for his comment.”

On the country’s embassy in Athens, Greece, the audit report said contrary to the extant regulations, it collected the sum of €31,765.00 (N6,782,005.38) without issuing Treasury Receipts even as it expended another N41,188,307.30 in excess of the approved estimates on 17 various recurrent subheads during the year under review.

Contravened regulations

In the Nigerian embassy in Dakar, Senegal, according to the report, CFA 8,814,638.88 (N2,250,313.00) was paid to 18 contractors in cash, thereby contravening the financial regulation which requires that payment to firms shall be made only by cheques.

It added that, “CFA 7,454,000.00 (N1,902,986.98) collected as revenue and entered in the register, but Treasury Receipts were not issued to the payers even when the mission had the Treasury Receipts in abundance.

“Hence it is difficult for me to confirm that (N1,902,986.98) as entered in the register was the actual revenue collected. Besides, it contravenes the financial regulation which requires that every sub-accounting officer or revenue collector shall issue a receipt for each sum paid to him.

“The permanent secretary has been informed of these irregularities for his comments and necessary action,” the report states.

Husband: I won't be able to sleep afterwards.
Wife: I can't sleep without it.
Husband: Why do you think of things like this in the middle of the night?
Wife: Because I'm Hot.
Husband: You get hot at the darnest times.
Wife: If you love me I wouldn't have to beg you.
Husband: If you love me you'd be more considerate.
Wife: You don't love me anymore.
Husband: Yes I do, but let's forget it for tonight.
Wife: Booooooo , !(Sob-Sob)
Husband: Alright, I'll do it.
Wife: What's the matter? Need a flashlight?
Husband: I can't find it.
Wife: Oh, for heaven's sake, feel for it.
Husband: There. Are you satisfied?
Wife: Oh, yes, honey.
Husband: Is it up far enough?
Wife: Oh, that's fine.
Husband: Now go to bed and from now on when you want the window open, do it yourself.

Dirty MINDS Now i wonder what u were thinking b4

A woman was driving along, and her car broke down. She decided to hitchhike to the nearest gas station. A truck driver hauling a load of chickens pulled up.
The driver asked, "Hey, little lady, need a lift?"
"Yes, my car broke down, and I need a ride to the nearest gas station, "
The driver replied, "OK, but first you have to f**k me! No f**k, no ride."
She said, "I`m sorry, I don`t need a ride that badly."
So the driver pulled away. All this time, the driver had a parrot on his shoulder.
The parrot started saying, "No f**k, no ride! No f**k, no ride!"
The driver said, "You had better shut up, bird, or I`m gonna throw you in back with the chickens!"
About two miles down the road, the parrot said, "No f**k, no ride!"
So the driver slammed on the breaks and threw him in back with the chickens! About 2 more miles further down the road, the driver heard sirens and saw flashing lights, so he pulled over.
He got out of the truck and approached the officer.
"What`s the problem, officer. I wasn`t speeding was I?"
The officer said, "I wasn`t pulling you over for speeding. I just wanted to inform you that you have a parrot throwing chickens out the trailer screaming, "No f**k, no ride! No f**k, no ride!"

"Doc," says Arthur, "I want to be castrated."

"What on earth for?" asks the doctor in amazement?

"It's something I've been thinking about for a long time and I want to have it done," replies Arthur.

"But have you thought it through properly?" asks the doctor.

"It's a very serious operation and once it's done, there's no going back. It will change your life forever!"

"I'm aware of that and you're not going to change my mind - either you book me in to be castrated or I'll simply go to another doctor."

"Well, O.K.," says the doctor. "But it's against my better judgment!"

So Arthur has his operation, and the next day he is up and walking very slowly, legs apart, down the hospital corridor with his drip stand.

Heading toward him is another patient, who is walking exactly the same way.

"Hi there," says Arthur, "It looks as if you've just had the same operation as me."

"Well," said the patient, "I finally decided after 37 years of life that I would like to be circumcised. "

Arthur stared at him in horror. "Damn! THAT'S the word!!!"

leuelliot:
i win

nooooooooooooo