₦airaland Forum

tooooo much mouth abeg bring action

bawomolo:
arenas charged with two felony.serves him right

ha ha idiot arenas lets see if he laughs at this one i think the way they been treating athletes lately he is going to do some time.Well Gilbert, I hope your lawyers are much better then Plaxico's. Good luck my friend!

^^^^^^hmmm

.FORD FIX OR REPAIR DAILY

kick his behind

[quote author=Abbey_city link=topic=380660.msg5315620#msg5315620 date=1263485220]Error![/quote]oh oh

BMW Brings Me Women

FIAT Failure in Italian Automotive Technology

FORD For Only Rough Drivers

HYUNDAI Hope You Understand Nothing's Drivable And Inexpensive,

VOLVO Very Odd Looking Vehicular Object

PORSCHE Proof Of Rich Spoiled Children Having Everything

KIA Kills In Accidents

OPEL Old People Enjoying Life

TOYOTA The One You Only Trust, Always

GOLF/GTI Girls Only Love Fun / Get Them Inside

HONDA Hanged Over, Now Driving Away

dont drink and drive

Habib16:
Bros no beg mi I go talk am,
na Kekenapep u dey use! Abi I lie?

bros u b winch ooo
how u take kno

[quote author=na2day! link=topic=380651.msg5316122#msg5316122 date=1263489657]People neva learn

http://thepmnews.com/2010/01/14/pastor-dupes-church-members[/quote]na wa o

[quote author=nice-guy10 link=topic=375901.msg5316731#msg5316731 date=1263494980]What is , was thinking you got a better kind of link, are always know for this kind of Poo.[/quote]bottom line its d truth

I

;d ;d

FORD Fix Or Repair Daily.

sweetliet:
@poster whch one u get

hmmmmm

legedis BENZ

To be fore-warned is to be fore-armed.



New Rules of Air travel for People of Nigerian Origin in the United States


1. Do not go to the toilet for the whole duration of your flight.

2. Do not carry any kind of container into the airport, or onto the plane.

3. Do not request for a window seat. Do not ask to sit in the aisle. Any request for specific seating may be indications of a premeditated plot.


4. If you are given food during the flight, ask the flight attendant not to give you cutlery. A Nigerian with a sharp implement on a plane is asking to be arrested.

5. Do keep your hands in plain sight during the flight. Do not look too happy or too sad.


6. Do not be too polite to flight attendants.

7. Do not be aggressive or have aggressive thoughts toward flight attendants

8. Try not to have any form of carry on luggage. If you do, make sure it contains
nothing suspicious or dangerous like pens, pencils, paper, or a calculator, as these are common bomb making materials.

9. Do not carry any electronic items that may be used to communicate with the Taliban ,or used for surveillance, like cell phones, iPods, walkmans, electric toothbrushes or cameras,

10. NEVER travel with your laptop computer.

11. Never travel if you have any kind of tribal marks. That includes the small marks you have managed to cover with facial hair.

12. Do not travel to the U.S if you are an engineer, if you have ever lived in London, or if your father is a banker.

13. Do not talk to other Nigerian on the same flight as you. It makes other people nervous.

14. Do not ask to be upgraded to first class or business class. Sitting too close to the front of the plane makes the pilot nervous.

15. Never admit to your fellow passengers that you are Nigerian. If asked, say you are from the Republic of Zamunda in East Africa.

16. When you are getting onto the plane, do not even glance at the cockpit.

17. Women, do not wear wigs, weaves or hair pieces. Any form of disguise is suspicious.

18. Take a cold shower before coming to the airport. Sweating and scratching yourself is a sign of nervousness. Why are you nervous?

19. Do not fart on the plane. Noxious smells might indicate you have bomb making chemicals hidden in your underpants.

20. Do not go home with the free magazines in the plane. Yes, it says “free”, but that is just a test. Leave the plane with those magazines and you’ll be arrested.

21. Wear clean underwear and be ready for a full body/cavity search.

22. Do not carry any potentially dangerous or toxic substances onto the plane like toothpaste, cough mixture, bottled water, mouthwash, lipstick, chewing gum or baby formula, Make sure your baby’ diapers are empty.

23. Do not get angry with fellow passengers, for any reason, even if it’s their fault. You will still be arrested and sent to Guantanamo Bay.

24. Do not travel by air into, out of, or across the U.S if you are Muslim.
Muslim is defined as :
a. Any person with a suspicious name like Mohammed, Fatal, Fatima, Barrack or Ibrahim, or if your last name starts with El-, Al-, or Abdul-. All Nigerian Alhajis, Alhajas, Alfas and Imams are forbidden from entering U.S airspace
a. Anyone that has ever entered a mosque.
b. Anyone that knows what a mosque is.
c. Anyone that dresses in long flowing garments.
d. Anyone that has a beard.

NOTE: If you converted from Islam to Christianity, you are still classified as Muslim.

25. Always travel with some kind of proof that you are a Christian. Preferably always travel with your pastor.

26. Do not attract attention to yourself. Do not drive to the airport in your Mercedes or Honda like a typical Nigerian. Instead, drive an American car like Pontiac or Chevy. You may be mistaken for an American. Or Haitian.

27. Do not ask to drink soda, tea or coffee in the airport or on the plane. Always ask for alcohol to prove you are not a Muslim.

28. Do not travel by air in the U.S if you have ever had a parking ticket, extra-marital affairs, stolen stationary from your office, or if you have ever exceeded the speed limit. This is a sign of severe subversive terrorist behavior.

27, Do not travel on or around Christmas day or on September 11th. Avoid travelling on or around Easter, Thanks Giving , Independence day or New year’s Day. Avoid traveling on Muslim holidays. Avoid air travel in the summer or winter. (NOTE: no specific reason, its just to piss you off)

28. YORUBA people please!!! Do not prostrate to greet your elders at the airport. People may thing you are dodging bullets or protecting yourself from a bomb blast.

29. NEVER, EVER carry any kind of Nigerian food onto a US aircraft.

30. Wearing agbadas, head ties, wrappers, danshikis, etc to the airport is not recommended. They make you look very un-American, and therefore potentially dangerous.

31. Do not act like a typical Nigerian for the duration of the flight. This includes speaking any language other than “American English”. Speaking any “funny” language is to be avoided. If you have elderly parents that do not speak “American”, they should NOT speak for the duration of the flight. If spoken to, their response to anything should be “Yeah man”.

32. DO not talk to your fellow passengers. Statements like “hello” might be misconstrued to be “Hello, you are my next victim”. Statements like “Hello, my name is Mohammed”, may be interpreted as “my name is Mohammed and I’m gonna blow up this goddam plane”.

33. Do not wear large afros that may conceal weapons or bombs.

34.Do not carry any kind of document , newspaper or book that contains any form of Arabic inscription or writing. You will be detained until a translator can be found.

35. Do not argue when you are told your luggage is over weight. Apologise profusely and pay double what they ask you for excess luggage.

This guide was created by the Nigerian Counter-Terrorism Unit. Research was sponsored by The Save Your Behind (SYB) Trust Fund.

To be fore-warned is to be fore-armed.



New Rules of Air travel for People of Nigerian Origin in the United States


1. Do not go to the toilet for the whole duration of your flight.

2. Do not carry any kind of container into the airport, or onto the plane.

3. Do not request for a window seat. Do not ask to sit in the aisle. Any request for specific seating may be indications of a premeditated plot.


4. If you are given food during the flight, ask the flight attendant not to give you cutlery. A Nigerian with a sharp implement on a plane is asking to be arrested.

5. Do keep your hands in plain sight during the flight. Do not look too happy or too sad.


6. Do not be too polite to flight attendants.

7. Do not be aggressive or have aggressive thoughts toward flight attendants

8. Try not to have any form of carry on luggage. If you do, make sure it contains
nothing suspicious or dangerous like pens, pencils, paper, or a calculator, as these are common bomb making materials.

9. Do not carry any electronic items that may be used to communicate with the Taliban ,or used for surveillance, like cell phones, iPods, walkmans, electric toothbrushes or cameras,

10. NEVER travel with your laptop computer.

11. Never travel if you have any kind of tribal marks. That includes the small marks you have managed to cover with facial hair.

12. Do not travel to the U.S if you are an engineer, if you have ever lived in London, or if your father is a banker.

13. Do not talk to other Nigerian on the same flight as you. It makes other people nervous.

14. Do not ask to be upgraded to first class or business class. Sitting too close to the front of the plane makes the pilot nervous.

15. Never admit to your fellow passengers that you are Nigerian. If asked, say you are from the Republic of Zamunda in East Africa.

16. When you are getting onto the plane, do not even glance at the cockpit.

17. Women, do not wear wigs, weaves or hair pieces. Any form of disguise is suspicious.

18. Take a cold shower before coming to the airport. Sweating and scratching yourself is a sign of nervousness. Why are you nervous?

19. Do not fart on the plane. Noxious smells might indicate you have bomb making chemicals hidden in your underpants.

20. Do not go home with the free magazines in the plane. Yes, it says “free”, but that is just a test. Leave the plane with those magazines and you’ll be arrested.

21. Wear clean underwear and be ready for a full body/cavity search.

22. Do not carry any potentially dangerous or toxic substances onto the plane like toothpaste, cough mixture, bottled water, mouthwash, lipstick, chewing gum or baby formula, Make sure your baby’ diapers are empty.

23. Do not get angry with fellow passengers, for any reason, even if it’s their fault. You will still be arrested and sent to Guantanamo Bay.

24. Do not travel by air into, out of, or across the U.S if you are Muslim.
Muslim is defined as :
a. Any person with a suspicious name like Mohammed, Fatal, Fatima, Barrack or Ibrahim, or if your last name starts with El-, Al-, or Abdul-. All Nigerian Alhajis, Alhajas, Alfas and Imams are forbidden from entering U.S airspace
a. Anyone that has ever entered a mosque.
b. Anyone that knows what a mosque is.
c. Anyone that dresses in long flowing garments.
d. Anyone that has a beard.

NOTE: If you converted from Islam to Christianity, you are still classified as Muslim.

25. Always travel with some kind of proof that you are a Christian. Preferably always travel with your pastor.

26. Do not attract attention to yourself. Do not drive to the airport in your Mercedes or Honda like a typical Nigerian. Instead, drive an American car like Pontiac or Chevy. You may be mistaken for an American. Or Haitian.

27. Do not ask to drink soda, tea or coffee in the airport or on the plane. Always ask for alcohol to prove you are not a Muslim.

28. Do not travel by air in the U.S if you have ever had a parking ticket, extra-marital affairs, stolen stationary from your office, or if you have ever exceeded the speed limit. This is a sign of severe subversive terrorist behavior.

27, Do not travel on or around Christmas day or on September 11th. Avoid travelling on or around Easter, Thanks Giving , Independence day or New year’s Day. Avoid traveling on Muslim holidays. Avoid air travel in the summer or winter. (NOTE: no specific reason, its just to piss you off)

28. YORUBA people please!!! Do not prostrate to greet your elders at the airport. People may thing you are dodging bullets or protecting yourself from a bomb blast.

29. NEVER, EVER carry any kind of Nigerian food onto a US aircraft.

30. Wearing agbadas, head ties, wrappers, danshikis, etc to the airport is not recommended. They make you look very un-American, and therefore potentially dangerous.

31. Do not act like a typical Nigerian for the duration of the flight. This includes speaking any language other than “American English”. Speaking any “funny” language is to be avoided. If you have elderly parents that do not speak “American”, they should NOT speak for the duration of the flight. If spoken to, their response to anything should be “Yeah man”.

32. DO not talk to your fellow passengers. Statements like “hello” might be misconstrued to be “Hello, you are my next victim”. Statements like “Hello, my name is Mohammed”, may be interpreted as “my name is Mohammed and I’m gonna blow up this goddam plane”.

33. Do not wear large afros that may conceal weapons or bombs.

34.Do not carry any kind of document , newspaper or book that contains any form of Arabic inscription or writing. You will be detained until a translator can be found.

35. Do not argue when you are told your luggage is over weight. Apologise profusely and pay double what they ask you for excess luggage.

This guide was created by the Nigerian Counter-Terrorism Unit. Research was sponsored by The Save Your Behind (SYB) Trust Fund.

cus you women don't know a good man when you see one

asha 80:
I thought we are the giant of africa

since when
giant with no president

[quote author=nice-guy10 link=topic=375901.msg5312902#msg5312902 date=1263461890]The fact is that there is no link or source to the story, as for Abuzola and Tudor, this is a christian forum so do not reply to any post here. Go to your lslam for muslims Terrorist forum. you guys are senseless and wicked.[/quote]

kola oloye:
Give us the source.

http://thepmnews.com/2009/12/28/pastor-tortures-boy-with-pressing-iron

happy now

Psalms 27

The lord is my light and my salvation, whom shall i fear

now HOLDDDDDDDDD ONNNNNNNN
isn't it the FATHER OF THE BRIDE that is suppose to pay for the wedding

na wah o

justwise:
3some then

[quote author=Busy_body link=topic=380664.msg5310613#msg5310613 date=1263427219]@r231 and toowise
anything for you two, cos u r both a star.

@tope
whaddaya mean Sauron can't afford that, why una dey drag my darling's yansh on d ground so, don't stop though, he deserves it and more, lol.

@amebo
na long throat go kill una, oya say amen, lol.[/quote]awwww

@The Amaka

http://www.sunnewsonline.com/webpages/features/showpiece/2010/jan/10/showpiece-10-01-2010-004.htm

justwise:
Chie! i can't believe my luck

me 2

[quote author=!amebo no1 link=topic=380664.msg5310534#msg5310534 date=1263426446]For me , he must have nothing less than 20 million, not naira, i mean in dollars , yea baby, dollars [/quote]pere

^^^^^^dammm
na fight

^^^^^loff you 2 sweetie lol

[quote author=mama-gee link=topic=379686.msg5310324#msg5310324 date=1263424609]No, I'm saying that I saw them in your house and I almost threw up. [/quote]they belong to ma daughter
she has bout 3 diff. ones

@The Amaka
so you're saying this was your opinion all along? why am i not surprised someone would make up some mumbo jumbo that we know isn't true? sigh. .


come on now not you too,,,,,,no its not my opinion all i am trying to tell d guy/chick is jus cus we disagree don't me dat he should be calling me names simple and d same goes to you too pls what do you mean mumbo jumbo like I am the one that wrote the article or something

[quote author=Busy_body link=topic=380664.msg5310322#msg5310322 date=1263424596]IS that my j-girl? Wey u carry dat ya bakassi go all these years? If my man has �200,000 and wants to stump up 20% of that for our wedding, i will tell him to give me the cash and use it to buy a 3 bed property somewhere up north like in some part of d dales or the shires, the rental of around � 500 per month is enough to keep me in enough Jimmy Choo's to satiate my long throat, lol.[/quote]good deal

[quote author=mama-gee link=topic=379686.msg5310295#msg5310295 date=1263424363]Those boots are the ugliest shoes ever made
ewwwww, looks like garbage[/quote]so are you saying that u don't wear them