₦airaland Forum

NofiuFade:
train the older one to learn how to defend themselves from bullying not even because of the family but because they are still going to encounter it life, in schools and in their place of work, they should start learning how to defend themselves , pls don't hesitate even if its going to take you to involve with them in some physical activities like sports, gym and boxing, it is very very important!

Ayokunlemi96:
Op, hi. I pray your children will grow to become kids you'll be proud of, amen.

We are three boys too, I am the one in the middle. Big brother is two years older while kid brother is six years younger. I used to fight my big brother when I was small too, over every little thing and my big brother would hardly fight back. He saw me as someone to be protected or loved or something, we would play all sorts of and when it came to fights, he wouldn't engage.

I could remember when I was 4 or 5, dad bought us toy guns that used batteries, such that when you squeeze the trigger it would make gunshot sounds. Somehow the naughty in me wanted to know what made the sounds, I dismantled my gun and assembled it back, couldnt find what I was looking for and lost what I had. The sound stopped working. I became a mockery amongst our friends, the whole play group migrated to my brother's camp, so much bitterness came over me. Following day, as we were returning from school, I left my brother who would always hold my hand from school home (school wasnt far from home, both within an estate), and ran home, took his gun and smashed it. Brought us both to the same page.

Evening time, time for play, his gun wouldnt work, everyone knew it was me, my mum told him I did the evil job, hoping he would beat the evil out of me, but he didnt, he merely looked at me and moved on. He never fought me back. And when we grew up a liitle more I still refused to know my place, I would engage him in fisticuffs, my mom would see us and never seperate us, he started beating me back to back anytime we fought. Painment that I had was terrible, I would brew another fight and still get whooped. The last fight we had I was in Jss2 and he in Jss3, he beat my ass in the room, I went to the kitchen to pick the pestle to destroy his head, mom saw me as she was in the kitchen but didn't flinch. As soon as I came out of the kitchen and headed for the room, my dad ran to take the pestle from me. I think we had one silly fight after that, he beat my ass, I turned water on his bed to hurt him but my mom made me sleep in the wet bed overnight.

It will continue, the older boy sees the younger one as a companion, friend and naturally exudes love towards him but the younger one sees the older as a threat (strange stuff). To support this, my big brother wasn't scared, he was never a coward, he would fight anyone who tried to beat me, like real fight my mom would beg him to leave the person (as the story was told to me) and he once jumped down from a decking when he was 7 or 8. He told me to jump, I refused and he dared himself to it, broke his right foot though, the evil in me was once again happy. We were never scared (except for ghosts) and he never cowered (except against me, out of love).

Currently, my older brother is like my little daddy, I can't even mention a quarter of the things he has pulled for me. During our teenage years, I would think I was wiser and this nigga is just dumb, but on the contrary, he so depth, understanding and analytical. I respect him more than I will ever respect all A.P.C chieftains put together. I dropped all of my shenanigans after my teenage years.

My advice to you is to always make them know what is right, in due time they will adopt the measures. Policing, enforcing and persistent reprimanding will not do any good. My dad beat both my brother and I four times or so, little brother, twice. We turned out good, I bet you. They always told us what was right to do, they showed us by living it and God gave us the spirit of discernment to distinguish. My dad's immediate younger brother acts same way to my dad too and I know other bros too but in the end, we succumb to the guidance and leadership of our older brothers. So guide your wards and always pray for them. God be with you and yours.

Platony:
It's fun for me wit my 3 boys..... D tin is,.. U will be nagging most tyms n canin too is very necessary. Though, na der mummy dey suffer am pass. But, it's fun anyways

victorian:
When he was done with his youth service, he started bullying my mum in her old age. Anytime I come back from work, I find my mum in her room crying that what has she done to deserve this kind of son.
I will be so pissed and very angry. Cos this woman is frail and old already. What's wrong with this guy! I will calm my mum down and ask her what happened, she will tell me, that he brings ladies to the house and the ladies will come to where she's watching TV jejely o and he will come to the parlour and change the station she's watching saying his gf will prefer another station and she will look at him with shock, are u OK? He talk rudely back to her, and that she should go back to her room infront of his gfs. They end up exchanging bitter words and the girls will. Leave with embarrassment.
After calming her down, I will go to his room and quarrel with him. Do u want to kill this woman! Our own mum again! And u know how frail and old she is!
After shouting at him, he will say get out of my room! I will leave then go back and console mum.
One day she had an heart attack cos of his bullying and wahala. And she died 10mins as I and neighbors were rushing her to hospital. Infact she died in my arms. I was so distraughted. On the day we buried her, at night. She came to my dreams and lunged at my brother that he killed her. Trying to strangle him in the dream.. I tried removing her hands from his neck. I did eventually and dragged her outside the house, she then slumped in my hands, saying he killed me.. He killed me.
I was crying as I held onto her tightly, then she slept in my arms and I woke up!
I confronted him, he said its a lie! Enemies are confusing my thoughts abiut him. I just shook my head as I kept crying..

So After her burial, after selling her houses and sharing everything she owned immediately , cos he wouldnt let me rest about relinquishing her property papers to him. He even trhreathened my life sef.
So we sold everything. I told him the day he was itching for her property papers, that so it's because of mama houses, u were so troublesome and wanted her dead! No wonder! uv succeeded in killing her. He said am saying rubbish. He just need the houses sold!

Last last sha, we sold everything. He squandered his share, with drugs and women then ended up in the village.. He's not himself anymore. Sometimes he talks to him, while he walks.

He's like in a trance. I brought pastors, even alfas to pray for him, they all said he has been cursed by our mum on her dying day and he will suffer for many years before he gets himself back again and nobody can deliver him until the curse has run its course and duration.

So he's just there sha. A shadow of himself but alive and kicking.

One day the spirit of mama will set him free.

Rest in Peace mum.


It's a curse to give birth to a bad child. And don't ever over pamper your children. It has terrible repercussions in the future.

Davindal:
Mehn... This topic is exactly the case in my most older sister's home. She has 6 boys: triplets, and the other 3 boys single, with 2yrs between them.

The triplets are 8 yrs old now. The others are 6, 4, 2, respectively. These boys have turned my sister house to war-zone. Anytime of the day they are all around, they often fight.

Guys, my sister often tells me whenever we have a discussion on phone that she will put the 4th son(the 6 yrs old) under the care of my mum, because the triplets and the other lasts two boys don't allow him rest. These triplets are always bullying him. To add salt to his injuries, the other last two: the immediate younger brother - who is very violent, and the youngest of them who is 2, don't give a damn about him either.

My sister said he is very calm and gentle. He always stays glued to her whenever she is at home. She do say that she fears the psychological impact such thorny environment would have on the 6 year old, that she is not relenting in her decision to take him his grandmother - my mum for hitch free environment.

The 5th son challenges everyone including the triplets, but the most hit is the 4th son - his immediate older brother.

The last son is already showing very violent and abusive character. Despite being small, this boy would challenge everyone. He would grab something very tight to collect it from his brothers.

Boys are good, but could be brutal to one another when growing up as siblings.

victorian:
Sighs unfortunately as the only girl in the midst of two boys. I realised early when I was very little how my last brother will always bully and fight my elder brother. And when our mum will come in to check what's happening, my last brother will start crying, saying my elder brother is just beating him and it's all lies. My mum will beat my elder brother, who is calmly protesting that it's a lie.
Because my youngest brother has very innocent look, my mum will pounce on my elder brother and beat him. I will scream it's a lie o.
My elder brother was on his own and the other is always pushing him. Or hitting or kicking him. But the deed is done already. My elder brother will be crying. When my mum turns her back and head to the kitchen. My younger brother will be laughing silently at my elder one.

He bullied my elder brother for years who is sicker. As my elder bro grew up and him as well. My younger one hated my elder one with great passion. And the elder one just ignored him and cut him off around him. Until Later my elder brother died of sickle cell anemia.
Immediately after his death, my younger brother started bullying me. Lol

I was so mad and I warned him one day and said the way u bullied and fought our elder bro and eventually made him die. You want to kill me join Abi? Your plan won't work! I stood up to him, face to face, while we snarled at each other

One-day he was angry with me and he blurted out! Why didn't God made him come first to this world! And look For your information Sis, am your elder bro, whether u like it or not! Cos am a man!
I will reply angrily, then go and beat God and warn him why he created me first! U can do nothing!

Ha! God!

It was so terrible. He's like a thorn in our flesh.

But last last, where is he now? He's evil and jealous mind had eventually placed him where he belongs. Karma is always there waiting patiently for wicked people.

Anyways op, I just pray u can handle those boys. Cause trust me, if u don't handle them well, especially the younger one and beat him well for bullying his older one. He may become uncontrollably later on in life. Use iron hand and force him to be respectful whether he likes it or not!

And that's where your husband comes into play. He must enforce respect from the younger one to the older one. He must! For sanity to rein later on.

galadima77:
I'm a little concerned, reading up all these cos i have young triplets who'll soon realize they're about mates... I've seen the troubles twins put my younger sister through in the battle for seniority and i keep wondering what will become of me.

Ishilove:
2 years old, actually.

He can have a man to man talk with his two year old toddler. The words will probably will fly over the baby's head like fighter jets, but on the flip side, your meaningless droning will keep the boy reasonably baffled and occupied for the duration.

chineduemmao:
have a chat with a 3 yr old? u shitting me?

simiolu1:
I can totally relate to this as my immediate elder brother is 2 years older than I am (I am the last born of the family). As children, we fought a lot and this continued well into our late Teens but the frequency reduced over time. He used to be short-tempered while I am stubborn. We are both on those character flaws but Yorubas will say "ki tan boro l'ara were". I call him by name even though I am not supposed to (Yoruba culture). An Aunt came to stay with us when we were Teens and wanted to correct it but it was too late by then.

On one occasion while we were children, our elder brother (the 2nd born) allowed us to fight till we had our fill to know who should have bragging rights. By the end of that fight, I had learnt a lesson: I could never match him in a fight. He is taller, has less fat and has very strong bones. I had a swollen red eye while his balls hurt (I continued pulling them as he rained blows on me). Then our bro disciplined us and hoped the fights would stop; they did not.

Now we never get physical, only shouting matches which happen very rarely. This is not because we have grown older (I am almost 30) but because of mutual respect between us. We now talk through issues and apologise. But if anything, I respect him more because over the last few years, he has shown that 2 years age difference can never be bought in the market. He counsels me, advices me, defends me and looks out for me.

So madam, the only lasting solution to the fighting is teaching them respect. Respect is reciprocal, the younger has to respect the elder and vice versa. But you really need to work on the older one. You have to teach him to lead his younger one, looking out for him, and defending him (boys will go out to play and fight; would he be crying while his brother is getting the beating of his life?). You have to teach him to assert his authority as the elder and also to be fair. You have to teach him to put the well being of his younger one first. And you have to do all these with love so that he won't feel his younger one is loved more than him.

It is his acts of leadership that will win him the respect of his younger one. Fighting may win it for him for a while, leadership will win it for him for life. And to that younger one, you have to teach him his place.

Godspeed!!!

Earthbound:
Ensure the older boy gets double portions of food, veggies, vitamins and all that good stuff. Introduce sport to him as well. His interaction with his mates (and possibly some older Ines too) will make himim bolder and stronger. Thank me later.

Firgemachar:
But 2 is quite young nah
I can't believe a 2 year old boy is as troublesome as the OP is painting him.

I think the OP is just exaggerating.

I restrain my 4-year old from beating his 2-year old sibling at the slightest provocation.

And sometimes when I am not quick to stop him, I beat him back thoroughly.

sammydirectly:
No, not the same. You think this is all about algebra and maths?

4 and 2 are kids yet. They see themselves as mates. No amount of correction will change things. The 2 will never see the 4 as senior. Solution: parents should treat them fairly, equally. You buy same things for both.

8 and 6 ( and higher) - this is when you begin to let the 6 know that 8 is senior. Buy one big snack, tell the 8 to cut into two and take the biggest. Buy 5 fruits, divide it to 3 and 2, tell the 8 to pick first. He will pick 3 fruits, if he picks 2, scold him. Also, let 8 help 6 in doing his homework. Let 8 choose the channel to watch on TV. Each time, always reiterate that 8 is senior but don't overdo it. Sometimes, you can allow the junior some privileges (like choosing TV channel) by reiterating that he is a baby of the house and should be pampered. Get the senior to agree with you.

As they grow older, the junior will automatically programme himself, because the senior will OBVIOUSLY show maturity in most things,especially homework, housework, spelling, use of phone and PCs, etc

Ishilove:
Then you have to step into the fight and put the younger one in his place.

That's the beauty of having male children. You get to act umpire in wrestle mania

ruggedboy01:
Malami said the ICC had “escalated” eight potential cases against Nigeria from “the initial preliminary examination to preliminary investigation”.

Six of the cases were said to be against Boko Haram and two against the military.

stacyadams:
Let the older one beat the younger one up on a good day...otherwise em no go get respect ..he gats man up

Ishilove:
Let them fight, they are boys. That is the only way the elder will establish his seniority. When the younger gets his little butt whupped, he will learn to fear and most importantly respect his older brother.

thesicilian:
The part I like about all boys is when you tell them it's time to take your bath, and this one runs this way and the other runs that way. Overall it's fun.

Mariangeles:
If you don't teach your younger children to how to respect the older ones, how do you expect them to learn?
If you don't set them straight now, it will be harder for you later in life!
Teach your child the way he should go...

xynerise:
Abiku
Harwa
Arrow of God
Ayamatanga
Witch Doctor of the Living Dead

kinibigdeal:
Is not a plastic fish, any fish that has expired in the ice safe will not cook. Is an expired fish that has used up to a year in the ice. No longer good for human consumption

saintade01:
Hello Peeps.

Please kindly advise. Is Kia Soul very good on the platforms {Uber / Taxify} ?

Origamist:
What sort of useless thread is this.
Congratulate GTB if you want to.
Don't drag Innoson into this.
Later some of you will claim Igboes are the ones who always instigate tribal wars here.