₦airaland Forum

simsay:
Every life is sacrosanct, either 1000 or just 1

LaudableXX:
You want to find someone better because of one stupid mistake she made over one weekend? I laugh in Chinese! Are you an angel, yourself?
Haven't you ever gone off with a friend and lost track of time? You chaps need to sit down with real men, and get tutorials on how to conduct yourself as a man, and build meaningful relationships.

LaudableXX:
Has it occurred to you that too many men have flaws, just like the women and they are not perfect either? Have you ever heard of the curse of the familiar? No? Let me break it down.

At the start of a relationship, everything is new, shiny and exciting, because the whole affair is still a novelty. As days turn into weeks, and weeks into months, then the novelty wears off to the extent that everything becomes familiar, and common place. And that is what our local folks call "see finish." Nothing is exciting, anymore.

In order to stave off boredom, such men go hunting for new things. In the process, a new girl catches their fancy and the thrill of the chase begins. It is not that there is anything wrong with the old girl, it is just that the relationship has become stale, common place and too 'familiar.' For a man that is undisciplined, this cycle will recur over and over again. He dates a girl for a while, the affair gets stale, he dumps her citing a multitude of funny reasons, and moves on to another babe. And this beat goes on, repeatedly. But a rational man with a sound mind, will sit down to assess the situation, and try to make his old relationship more exciting, in order to take things forward, and make it more stable. That is what a sane man would do, but too many of my male friends lack the trait and discipline to think things through, and apply wisdom to get their relationships working again.

linearity:
OP delete this nonsense, there is no scriptural bases for it. Those are just your interpretation of those verses, none of those bible verses reached the conclusion that you reached.

Jesus addressed this very situation personally and he reached a position opposite to yours, I will stay with Jesus on this...

John 4:16-18

“16 Jesus saith unto her, Go, call thy husband, and come hither.

17 The woman answered and said, I have no husband. Jesus said unto her, Thou hast well said, I have no husband.

18 For thou hast had five husbands; and he whom thou now hast is not thy husband: in that saidst thou truly.

Going by your analogies, having slept with a minimum of six men, Jesus would have told her that, she have six husbands.

And despite the fact that, she was currently living with a man, Jesus agreed with her that she is not married.

The above is enough and I would have stopped there, but I would like to add that...if adultery and fornication is marriage, then the Bible will be contradicting itself by calling it a sin.

....because the scriptures says...”marriage is honorable in all and the bed undefy, but whoremongers and adulteries, God will Judge.

YesNoMaybe:
Op.
Sex is communion. Yes. It's not a marriage.

A marriage unites not just two individuals BUT two bloodlines (families) via an exchange of vows (covenant) and a testament (dowry).
One could decide to opt out of a communion at any time (if there's knowledge available on how to do it). Why? Because sex is a tool for aligning destinies (relationship).
But marriage is meant to last for life. God said "I hate divorce" and not "I hate breakups".
If I have sex before marriage, I bond to the partner, not by covenant but by RELATIONSHIP. It's a Communion. It's not a matrimony.
Being a Christian for an example involves communion with the creator (you've got the choice to opt out at any time) while marriage......

Stop using the scripture to put fear into people. So, if I had slept with 500 persons before giving my life to Christ, I'm married to them even up to this point? Okay, if I'm no longer married to them due to my salvation, am I not countering God's stance against a divorce (I'd divorced 500 partners, remember?)?

BabaRamota1980:
You read what I wrote but Im not sure you understand.

IN ORDER TO BETTER OUR SOCIETY....popular public opinion ought to prevail in a neutral value proofing mechanism such as in this case a Live Test.

We have been agitating for transfer of power to youths. We have to demonstrate capacity for intelligence and competence to lead society.

BabaRamota1980:
Thats what im saying. NBA belongs to the practicing professionals. It is not a perfect body. As an extension of society, controversies such as this....where there is a clear contravention of law should not be debated. It is already resolved by a law which says Amasa has the right to wear hijab. NBA has no claim of superiority or heirarchy above law.

What is in contention, and which im addressing, is the broad application that if Amasa is permitted by law, then anyone can dress in a garment that catches their fancy and show up to be called to bar. You can imagine the chaos and comical effect when someone shows up in egungun garment or some other similar outfit.
Such a parade is a retrogade to the society. We want to keep advancing, not go back in our civility. So how do you filter what is acceptable dress code and which is not? The law already said they all are, even the egungun dress. There is a process called "popular public opinion". It is sometimes also called "popular public interest". These are sets of rules that a society hold true to itself and passes as a convention of public life and orderliness. It is not necessarily found in law statutes but its an aid to living in harmony within a society.

For instance there is no law that forbids a woman from going braless in public. The law demands decent covering of the body. So how do interprete braless appearance as indecent? This is part of the effect of popular public opinion that the society would prefer women appear in public with their breasts veiled from view. This is just a simple quick sample and there are many very strong ones i can relate.

So my focus is filtering of the extreme appearances to bar so that we do not submit civility to ridicule.

The jury on what is acceptable or not should be "popular public interest" using Live Test to proof the case.

Whatever a traditionist wear as part of daily living and in observance of his/her traditional faith in public appearance passes the Live Test.

Whatever a Christian wears as part of keeping faith in everyday, everywhere presence will pass the Live Test.

No one has denied that Amasa does not wear hijab everyday and everywhere as part of her observation of Islamic faith.

forzarush:
Raise your hand over your head and give yourself a knock. she is not ' the Muslim sisters that (has) have been called before her' and as to whether or not they are inferior,you should know since you seem to think you and your 'people pointers' know about Islam. Goan carry dictionary and look up the word fanatism.

forzarush:
Hijab is COMPULSORY, Olodo.

Baskela:
Lol this is funny, Paul never imagined a situation where each woman would call or refer to the man "her own" meaning 10 women can call the same man "her own" then how does it become "her own"?

Wouldn't he say "our own" or "their own"?

He was speaking of each woman having or owning her own husband. Meaning, no sharing. How hard is this to understand abeg?

And you do have polygamous tendencies, so go ahead and marry ten if you like but don't twist the scriptures to deceive Christians.

obowunmi:
No it doesn't. This is a lie from the pit of hell.

Monogamy is a choice.

Solomon the wisest man in the Bible had 300 plus wives and many more concubines.

Toks2008:
You deserve a standing ovation for your never ending hilarious myopia of the mind regarding this subject matter.

As long as you have passed through a road,you are very qualified to educate people about the road regardless of your experience on the road.

I strongly sense that you are a lady and I pray you don't end up in psycaltry if your man ever cheats on you(no pun) because with the way you are going,you won't be able to handle it so I really pray for you.

As I will always reiterate,polygamy is complex and not for every man but enough of this silly mindset of women clamoring for me and my husband alone cos most of them end up miserable,lonely and an intimacy gadget in the hands of randy guys after they leave their husbands as a result of cheating.

Toks2008:
You deserve a standing ovation for your never ending hilarious myopia of the mind regarding this subject matter.

As long as you have passed through a road,you are very qualified to educate people about the road regardless of your experience on the road.

I strongly sense that you are a lady and I pray you don't end up in psycaltry if your man ever cheats on you(no pun) because with the way you are going,you won't be able to handle it so I really pray for you.

As I will always reiterate,polygamy is complex and not for every man but enough of this silly mindset of women clamoring for me and my husband alone cos most of them end up miserable,lonely and an intimacy gadget in the hands of randy guys after they leave their husbands as a result of cheating.
It's none of your business if they end up lonely and desperate, they made their decision, respect their decision. If cheating was the cause of the breakup, why not address the problem, instead of asking someone to adjust with the problem.
You want to know if am a lady so you can look away from the topic and focus on the gender with all bias. If more men stand for what is right, things could actually be better.
Hey, that you pass through a road doesn't qualify you, cos you couldn't endure the thick and thin of the road before you gave up. Did u study womanology or the study of women, my guess is no,do you have a wife- no, have you trained a girl child upto the university level- my guess is no. Are you a trained marriage counsellor, if so, where is your certificate.

Guy, u can't give what you don't have. You failed in your marriage (the bitter truth, marriage doesn't work for everyone, fine, but for a self acclaimed marriage counsellor, you dint even take your own advice in choosing a life partner) and it seems you have deep seated issues with women. You should be seeing a psychologist or a certified marriage counsellor instead of advertising yourself as one.


And this is where I drop my pen.

tosyne2much:
So, you mean someone is not worthy of giving relationship advice because his own relationship actually ended on a sour note?


Is that not what you're driving at?

Toks2008:
I wont be surprised if you are a lady cos you put emotions in everything you do,say or think.I decide o respond just to set the tables straight and if after reading this comment,you stillhold on toyour view then im sorry i cant help further.

Look at my threads and read them normally and not upsidedown as many nairalanders do expecially the ladies. Now get this clear..we live in a wicked and uncaring world of men and o matter how i preach about the need for guys to be good to their ladies,those who will misbehave will still do so.

My threads are mostly geared towards making the women strong SHOULD THEY END UP WITH UNCARING GUYS AND CHEATS. We all know that few guys are good but most guys willbreak a ladys heart without any mercy.

Claiming that my threads encourages guys to do bad towarsd their women is the dumbest thing i have ever read on nairaland.

Everyday i see female divorcees or single mums and surprisingly,8 out of 10 left their husbands because he cheated on hem and i tend to wonder if ladies will ever get it..THERE IS NOTHING LIKE ONE MAN AND ONE WOMAN in the real sense but what we mostl have is one man one wife and many concubines but i guess its ok by the deluded woman as long as the man does not marry them..how foolish.

A man who stays faithful to one woman all his marital life is a rare gem but what happens to most ladies who find themselves with a cheat?these are the set of ladies i focus on..to let them know that there is more to life than looking for a faithful man upandan...

If you are still unmarried then it is really a waste of time for me to respond but i hope other will learn from these responses and if you are married then just pray you never catch your man or better still your man never cheats on hou cos if he ever does then come back and read m threads.

And lastly an advise for you..i am a very simpe minded man,and ou dont need to create new ID to counter me..just use your old one,and be free to ask questions rather than attack me and my personal life.

Toks2008:
First class troll...Chai! all these on top of another man Matta. ..for the records,I'm not in the league of guys that talk down on my ex NEVER...in fact she was the best thing that ever happened to me but sometimes shits happen.

Yes I was sonewhat married and even if it crashed I still believe I'm very qualified to give marital advise cos I have passed through the road...

Please spend your time contructively and stop trolling....Odensin

Toks2008:
I set you free from symptoms of CPDS(Chronic psychological disorientation syndrome)