₦airaland Forum

-> "YOU" - refers to anybody that the cap or shoe fits <-

Whats the wisdom in leaving Nigeria to experience the freedoms of the west but only to teach erroneous  propaganda back to the people you left? You are a walking contradiction.

I guess its easier to support something YOU LEFT BEHIND.

I bet, if theres any true  loyalty left, you'll never return to Nigeria by choice and if you do, you'll likely be labeled as a western ideologist.



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Also, all this talk about lonely women in Nigeria, what about the lonely men that leave Nigeria?

I doubt that an educated woman with a professional career is going to look twice at a sexist Nigerian man.

The women living in Nigeria shouldn't be shocked to know that single Nigerian men in Chicago often spend their nights with prostitutes.

You don't believe me? Visit Howard Street on the northside of Chicago and you'll learn that its no secret who "dominant" these women.

Oppressing women is the 1# reason so many women are being r-a-p-e-d and children being m-o-l-e-s-t-e-d.

Perverted men love submissive women, it makes their daughters easy targets.

With all this submission going on how can a woman get justice when she's been r-a-p-e-d? How can she protect her children?

One thing about the old testament, they use to stone r-a-p-e-s-t and child m-o-l-e-s-t-o-r-s to death but you guys are probably to busy dominating and justifying to protect children.

WHY THIS? WHY THAT? BECAUSE THIS IS AN INHERIT PROBLEM WITH SEXISM!

ANY FORM OF ABSOLUTE POWER ABSOLUTELY CORRUPTS! REMEMBER THAT

Oppressing your women has created a safe-haven for human trafficking and sexual abusers. This is both a dire shame and a tragedy.

kandiikane:
Although I understand other women's view on roles and I have given quotes on both these role I accept that for me personally. . . If I am married and I work and my husband is a house husband- I will definitely not allow that in my house. . If I have a weakling as my husband who says yes to everything I say- I will not allow that in my house. . .For me my role as a wife is to know that my husband is the head of the house, I did not marry him, he married me. I Will summit to him and do what he wants. In my marriage the moment I become the husband and wear the trousers its over. I see husbands who let their wives walk all over them as weaklings aka p[i]uss[/i]ies. I want a man who is a man and knows he is a man and takes no s[i]h[/i]it. . .I go to work come back and cook and clean, I will even massage his body if he wants and even clean his backside if worst comes to worst AS long as he treats me good, respects me as a woman,wife,mother, loves me adores me does his best to bring in for the family, treats me like a queen, being faithful,affectionate. . .etc By doing all these for my husband does not me I am below him or whatever you might think but because he is going to be my king and I will do all my best to treat him as such. I am stubborn yes but when it comes to my husband its no joke thing.

Btw, I was brought up in a family which mainly consists of women, where the women actually are the head of the households-being all defensive towards your husband or challenging is not what makes you the head but how you look after yourself, your husband, family and household.

I'm not against this, I believe it should be YOUR choice and NOT HIS,

If you want to be a housewife then thats fine but if your friends want to be doctors and engineers while you cook for your man, then thats fine too.

I'm talking about freedom to be more than the dictates of the male ego.

You believe the sole basis for manhood is being a dominant provider.(not to be confused with a love-vendor)

Then thats too bad, because you want your women to submit to men based on their ability to provide, then you are going to lose your women.

No wonder African women are exploited so much, because they are taught to submit to a provider.

No wonder people with "money" travel to the "land of the provider", there are no principles to stop them.

You callously justify cheating on your wives ,as you see fit, but wonder why your women are seeking men outside of Nigeria.


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My prediction is that the male population in Nigeria will continue to grow and all your educated women will continue to leave.

I predict that homosexuality among Nigerian men will multiply in direct correlation with the increasing disparity between the men to women ratio.

I predict that the same oppressive mindset that justifies female oppression will also feed the fear and denial of Nigeria's homosexual underground.

I also predict that the children's children of this "new era" Nigerian women are going to organize and fight this issue from the inside and the children of the educated Nigerian women who left are going to fight the issue from the outside.

Somewhere in the middle of this, the real truth will emerge, insecurity will surface in the form of increased violence against women.

Violence is what really makes oppression work, so stop hiding behind the bibles,

MzDarkSkin:
[color=#0055bb]PEACE AND LOVE TO YOU TOO BRO!
VERY nice talking to you and reading your matured responses. 
I will always appreciate a brother who is not afraid to use his brain. 
You are now my 'other' NL brother! Don't tell this guy named D-Sense I told you. He is the jealous type! LOL.
Have a good day hun.  [/color]

Mrs.Chima:
I just had a cyber heavenly feeling. Sorry. I am so damn proud, SERIOUSLY.

We may not always agree but it is a pleasure joining you in the fight against ignorance.

MzDarkSkin:
[color=#0055bb]Amen. It might be the fact that we are westerners that we feel the way we do, who knows? but one thing is for sure, no chauvinist man will have the pleasure of meeting my mama. That Lioness would eat him for supper!   But most importantly I wouldn't put up with that. I applaud you and we need more of you in the world.  [/color]

You know, my grandfather was the provider of 9 children but my grandmother ran the family.

My grandfather would expect me to work hard and provide for my family AND my grandmother would kick my azz if I disrespected women.

I might have my sexist moments such as women being in the NFL but thats more of a warning against what I think the physical outcome would be.

Peace & Love yall.

emmatok:
Bros, no vex,

See no woman wants to hear the word humility these days.
Because she went to school
Shes got a MSC
She works and earn plenty money.

So you see woman are now competing with men.

They are no more women they are ladies according to  FELA

Ironically the-same woman wants a man to "match" her to the altar.

Then she makes the marriage a living HELL, because she is in the marriage for competition.

Guy, try adjust your brain well well . Because women these days no send again  o o o.

Where I'm from its not uncommon for successful women to give all praise to allah or jesus for all that they accomplish.

We can't speak for everybody. However, everybody can speak for themselves and should be allowed to.

Brother, I encourage you to find love in a strong woman that compliments your strengths, challenges your weakness and completes your purpose in life.

MzDarkSkin:
[color=indigo]South Chi, you are a real man and I applaud you brother! 

we ALL know some women are not ideal wives. We already know some women are not worthy as they have lost their values or interest in being
upstanding women with dignity and self respect. Some women know nothing about womanhood or what it means to be nurturers. This we all know, but what I respect about you bro, is the fact that you emphasize the importance of celebrating the women who are on top of their game, who has their eyes on the prize and make it a point to seek education or be upstanding citizens for the sake of their children, siblings, husbands, parents etc to have hope. Such women should not and do not deserve to be placed with "wutless" women who are too concerned with finding a 'baller' and not a husband to support while being supported by him. As you said beautifully a woman should not be viewed as competition but rather a partner.
Some of these men would literally kill another for disrespecting their mothers, daughters, sisters; etc but are willing to degrade those of another. Seriously? SMH BIG TIME!!!

@topic: What kind of man believes he must flex his muscles on a woman by way of calling her names and declaring her place is to be his in house "punny"? Really? Is that what your mothers are to your fathers? or are your mothers the women who gave birth to their children, raised them and behaved as the PARTNER to their husbands? Even if one was not so fortunate to have both parents act as a unit muchless live together, we human beings are born with basic instincts to let us know right from wrong. You cannot tell me that you feel like a man bullying women. NO MAN can tell me that for in reality he is but a punk who too afraid to pick on his fellow man so his woman has to feel what he is afraid to deliver to someone of the same s3x.

Seriously tho, I have to ask. Why are these same men who are obsessed with str!ppers, pr0stitutes and other half n@ked models now coming on this thread bashing them? we all know there are l3sbians who purchase or download such pictures but the main target is that of men. Do not indulge in such things then try to degrade such women and style them as trash when you are practically giving these women the 'ok' to do such things. It's call hypocrisy. [/color]

Thats my point.

Its a woman's choice to be a President or a Cook. Its up to her!

My gripe is with men that perpetuate regression or that contribute to a form of "genocide".

This topic reminds of the abuse in the movie "The Color Purple"

And please consider that other races are educating their women, so how do you expect Nigerian women to compete against educated whites and asians when such low expectations are being encouraged? Think globally!

Richvkunt:
@SouthChi,

It appears you do not understand this thread.
Please don't be in such a hurry to ride to the defence of the other s.ex.
I know you want to be seen as a knight in shinning armour,but I suggest you go back and read my first post, carefully so that you can assimilate what I am talking about.
You have been on my case all day trying to j.erk me off(No hom.o)
I am gonna explain it to you just once then I am out.

1.Men and women are created to perform different functions in this life.
2.Women are created FOR men.1st Corinthians chapt11 verses 8 and 9.
3.Women are not prevented from advancing themselves in terms of education or job placement PROVIDED they stick to their God endorsed natural role of being a helper to their men by cooking,washing and warming the beds of their men.
4.Men are to meant to be the providers for the women.
5.However at times Men stray from their women because men by nature are polygamous and find it difficult to stick to one woman.
6.In conclusion the onus is on the woman to prevent her husband from straying by taking care to be submissive,cook his food,wash his clothes,warm his bed and bear his offspring,while he provides for her.

It is not rocket science,and it has been going on for ages and will continue to the universe comes to an end.

First of all, your tone is just degrading.

Secondly, hiding behind religion to justify a form of servitude is criminal psychology.

Thirdly, I believe that families are tiny governments and everybody should play a specific role but the roles should be based on maturity and ability, not prejudice.

Forth, I live with to provide, protect and repair. I don't do it to score points nor for competition. My family is made of contributors and it all adds up to pay the same bills.

Fifth, "straying men" doesn't justify polygamy as if murder could justify killing someone. Also Cheating/Straying is NOT the same as polygamy, because cheating involves a lie and manipulation. So stop justifying your lack of backbone(as a cheater) with a false comparison to Polygamy.

Six, stop misleading the youth and the people of Nigeria, for the love of your mother, aunties and daughters, please start respecting these women!

honeric01:

The likeness and love aspect is not an issue, the issue here is : Which is most suitable from the list i listed.

If LOVE isn't an issue then I've always known love to be generous. If this is absolutely mutual love without question then simply follow your heart, give her only the opportunity to say no.

190:
[color=RED]
Women these days know that the quickest route to stardom is by getting unclothed, doing surgeries and exposing their bum in public

to get noticed, why should we be concerned as long as they continue showing how starched they are, they obviously would be the least of worries

to the men,  You get to see alot of them here https://www.nairaland.com/nigeria/topic-207358.2016.html

No matter what they do, what they achieve or whatever they say

There is Just one role that suits them best -------------------->[size=38pt] LEPER HELPER[/size] [/color]

Whats interesting to me is how the educated women(that I support) are rarely the ones "showcasing" their sex appeal[ for money ].

How many female doctors and lawyers do you see posing naked for Playboy or stripping in nightclubs ? Probably none.

Whats also interesting is that the way out of oppression is usually coupled with education. And the way out of prostitution is usually education and a job.

However education is what you acknowledge as good but openly condemn the use of education by women because you are a sexist oppressor.

You find it two difficult to crack open an egg or to light the stove. Its an incredible feat for you to mix flour with water. I guess your man-brain is too superior to even make tea.

Grow up. The new era is rising Nigeria too new heights while you are being left behind. Pathetic!

I'm not married and I wouldn't marry a woman that "slaps" men for respecting women.

Blaming successful women for your failures is NOT manly.

playboy19:
This guy does not seems to get it. Apparently, nobody wants a liability as a wife, so she must work and like I said before, most new-age Nigerian women are educated, so don't get the whole thing twisted bro. Education is a must (even 'em women knows it) and successful career wouldn't be a bad thing but don't go about listening to Beyonce's "to the left, to the left (forgotten the title of that song)"  like someone already said and come back and tell me "Hey Mr. Nigga, no food and sex for you today" just because you feel we are equally and you can do whatever you want.

"do whatever you want"? Are you serious? So if a woman denies you sex then what do you do? force her?

You mad cause she educated and doesn't desire you. Pathetic little man. Grow up.

your so called "new age" nigerian is for a reason, in fact its bringing nigeria out of the dark ages an into the 21st Century.

Education is doing more for Nigeria than these cave man antics.

On one hand, you're proud of the education but on the other she can't be proud of herself? She can't get a job paying more than you? LOL. Your pride is a joke little man.

190:
[color=red]^You dont seem to get it, Men arent concerned bout how successfully women are

Personally speaking, I would want a wife who is well educated and sucessful in her carrer shes chasing

But the issue on ground now is the likes of OPRAH, Tyra banks and even beyonce (is that rite) who's successfully married

deceiving the young timid women of today bout making their voices heard!

would u settle down with a woman who cant take care of a home but rather chases POWER bout with men

The women around me are not timid. I don't keep in company with timid people unless I'm trying to uplift them.

I'm proud of Oprah and the Tyras and any other female that makes million$ of dollars a year. More power to them!

I don't live for power. People who feel "powerless" tend to live for power and history shows that there will never be enough for people like that.

I live for the love of my family and community. I have goals and dreams that include all the women in my life starting with my grandmother on down.

What I don't like. I don't like bullies. I don't like men that beat and abuse women. I don't like cowards. I don't like oppression.

These "timid"(emphasis) women you say surround you, pathetically reflex what type of men are in your community.

AS WE SAY IN THE STATES - GET YOUR WEIGHT UP!

Its just my opinion that women should have free speech just like any man does.

I think women should be encouraged to be educated and self sufficient.

I believe that a provider will prove it with actions and not with peer pressure or thru mere declaration.

I don't believe manhood requires submission from other human beings in the kitchen and bedroom.

Problems between spouses should be discussed and solutions should be agreed upon. How can you claim to be a man but can't handle someone else's opinion? especially your wife?

I guess when its all said and done. Your "literate wife with her Bachelor's degree" will cook and clean for you ,while you work.

However, my future wife will manage a hospital or perhaps she will own the company you will work for.

Her success doesn't not threaten my manhood. I will always work. I will always be responsible for her and my family.

Stop worrying about money and worry more about her character.

Also, if you are going to give, give from your heart and never expect anything in return.

Warning. People are often manipulated by money or they use money to manipulate other people. Take money out of the equation and solve for LOVE.

Laarvely:
Obviously there's a reason why you held out this long? Why change now?

I think its fantastic that you are a virgin it will be a special gift to a very special woman.

Stay strong and Be patient!
im sure u know dat wen men r virgins,its not recognised! if im gonna marry a guy,he shudnt and wont be a virgin! how d hell is he supposed to know how to satisy me?

Maybe your not his type?

He'll probably need a woman that can appreciate a virgin man, a woman that shares his principals.

I think two virgins discovering love making together is a beautiful thing.

Obviously there's a reason why you held out this long? Why change now?

I think its fantastic that you are a virgin it will be a special gift to a very special woman.

Stay strong and Be patient!

playboy19:
Look SouthChi, all what you're saying is based on what you see on TV about some underprivileged african countries like Somalia, Liberia and others. No Nigerian lady will ever tell you his husband ever stopped her from pursuing her education or whatever. So shut the fukk up, cos Nigerian women are not illiterates as you think. Most Nigerian women have atlease BSc, especially the new generation ones. We are only talking about being submissive here. So go preach your extreme abuse BS elsewhere.

If you're a Nigerian, you'll understand what the argument is all about. If you're not a Nigerian, i know you're only here to misinterprete all what you read, then write some stuppiid book about your unfortunate misconception and make yourself some money. This is not your board MR, move to the next board available or better still, research about another country.

Your argument to alienate me from this topic does NOT alienate me as a human being.

As a human being, I don't believe in oppression anywhere.

Oppression doesn't belong to the Somalians, the Iranians or any one nation, rich or poor.

However it does belong to YOU(male ego), you are a weak man seeking submission from a human being in order to feel like a man.

STOP HIDING BEHIND RELIGION!

Religious submission has nothing to do with YOU nor your nationality. Religious submission isn't about borders or tribes. Religious submission isnt about whats between your legs.

Religious submission has everything to do with a mans humble submission to God. A religious woman should ONLY submit to a man that is a dedicated humble servant of God.

IF YOU ARE NOT A DEDICATED HUMBLE SERVANT OF GOD THEN YOU NEED TO STOP THE BIBLE QUOTES IN SUPPORT OF WOMANIZING , BECAUSE YOU ARE USING GODS NAME IN VAIN

Inked_Nerd:

Suppose the girl actually is conceited? Nowadays, it seems like a lot of people are full of themselves. LOL, my sister takes pic for a UK site she write for and when she goes to Soho to take pics for the images for the website, the way people act when she approaches them for a pic is vicarious. In fact, some of them even come up to her and ask her to take her pic even though they have no idea who she is. All they see is photography equipment and and expensive camera and they just jump on it. Anyway, yes people have a right to have high self esteem but there is a difference between having high self esteem and being flat out conceited.

She has a right to be conceited, so what? If that makes her happy then be happy for her, you think? If she';s excited about her life and her looks then good for her, especially in these hard times. I don't understand why people spend so much time analyzing other people.

If I were a Nigerian woman, I would NOT marry a Nigerian Man that interferes with my education, employment and dreams.

The world is full of men that believe women are more than cooks and sex slaves.

Its your choice, not his, to settle for this extreme abuse and oppression.

Nigerian women need to visit places like the USA to experience really experience being an independent woman that doesn't need a man for anything.

I love independent women because I'm an independent man. It is the combination of two successful independent people that really created a strong partnership or marriage.

This thread paints Nigerian women as property entitled to men for the sole purpose of sex, cooking and cleaning.

This thread is telling the world that Nigerians men discourage their women from getting an education and from being gainfully employed.

This thread also encourages other Nigerian men to support the oppression of women.

THIS IS AN EMBARRASSMENT!

This mentality is a part of a self-imposed genocide.

Half of the Nigerian population are women. Why would you impose illiteracy on half the population?

Why do you want your children raised by an uneducated woman?

Most of the men in Nigeria are uneducated, so whats the wisdom in keeping your women from getting college degrees?

This extremely oppressive treatment of African women has to be connected with all the "mass r-a-p-e-s" that the world constantly hears about.

How can man love his mother and his daughters with this oppressive mindset? Thats betrayal against your own mother and daughters to practice this against your wife.

Divided by tribes,politics,religion,countries,regions. Africa is a rough place to live.

Here I am preaching unity between Black Americans and Nigerians yet Nigerians know from experience how ignorant prejudice and negative perception can be.

How can Nigerians want respect or unity with Ghana if you don't practice respect and unity amongst yourself?

direct eye contact, an honest compliment and a smile  

Well since this is all about opinion,

My opinion is that a man seeking a woman who only cooks and cleans has low standards and a woman that limits her life to being a "help mate" has low standards.

Thats just my opinion.

I work, cook and clean. I don't need a woman to clean my house because I'm an organized and clean man. My lady needs to have an education and a career so that we can cook our dreams into reality and clean any obstacles in our path.

It can't be right for a man to justify polygamy with the old testment then a woman denouces it with the new testment. Then a man justifies a "kitchen wife" with new testment then a woman defines the "kitchen wife" with the old testment.

How do you pick and choose what you can and can't use from the old testament? But that's another topic, nevermind

Richvkunt:
The world would be a much peaceful place if every one knew and accepted their role in this journey called life.
Men are meant to be providers.Women are meant to be submissive to their men,in the bedroom and in the kitchen.
That is natural.
The problem is women refuse to accept their natural role and this is the cause of tension all over the world and on this forum NL.
Men are by nature polygamous,there is no man that can stick to ONE woman,except you are a virgin or a sanctimonious fool,pretending on NL,with the hope that one of the females is gonna hook up with you.
Men and women shouild accept their natural roles created for them by nature.Trying to go against this creates tension and war of the genders.
I wish the men and women would stick to their natural and proper roles:the world would be so peaceful.
Please I do not hate women as some females on this forum always try to suggest,the simple fact is I do not take them serious at all;
Women are created to be playthings for men,they should please know their roles!
Rant over,am out!

Its NOT manly for a husband to blame his job loss on her success. If a man loses his job then he should be happy that somebody is paying the bills and if you
are not happy, then get your azz off the couch and go get a job.

You can't keep a woman in the kitchen just becomes you're unemployed. Thats stupid! Your foolish pride is going to starve your household.

Its not a new phenomena, all oppressed people do it at some point in their history,

Nonetheless, its not helping,

Nigerians are cowards against the people that are robbing the nation but are so diligent to oppose people that pose no real threat, and thats sad,

From my point of view, it makes no sense for Nigerians to be racist towards Black Americans, its a mentality that I have to "over-stand" in order to remain a part of the solution and NOT the problem.

Most people that don't eat healthy will eventually destroy their hair, skin and teeth,

Parents need to teach their daughters how to develop natural beauty by eating healthy, exercising and living clean/neat lifestyles.

Buying weave and makeup is just supporting an industry thats making billions off female[outward] self-destruction.

Let me school you,

Stop looking at your woman as a competitor and START looking at her as a partner, we're on the same team,

The stronger your woman is the stronger your family will be,

she has the right to feel "stuck up" as you put it,

some people mistaken conceit with confidence, i love people that have high self-esteems!

i say treat her with respect and encourage her to stay strong!

smh@Ndi's fellow criminals trying to justify her actions,

Stop trying to rationalize criminal behavior! It doesn't help,