₦airaland Forum

Anyone don see alert yet?

A fu...cking lying, useless, thieving and destructive government.

It shall not be well with you if you are an APC supporter, enikuuuure one by one

Bloody bastar....ds!

Daejumong:
Why did Pastor Isaac Oyedepo lose so much weight?

What could make the son of a billionaire shed so much weight in a short space of time ?

Pastor Isaac claimed he had health challenges as a result of his weight and losing weight has made him very healthy.

He lost weight through dieting and exercise.

Let us learn from this man of God and shed excess weight.

What are the dangers of being overweight?

Type 2 Diabetes: Obesity increases the risk of developing type 2 diabetes.

Heart Disease: Excess weight contributes to heart disease.

High Blood Pressure (Hypertension): Obesity is linked to elevated blood pressure.

Dyslipidemia: This includes high LDL cholesterol, low HDL cholesterol, or elevated triglyceride levels.

Certain Cancers: Obesity raises the risk of breast, colon, and endometrial cancers.

Stroke: Obese individuals are more susceptible to strokes.

Gallbladder Disease: Obesity can lead to gallstones.

Fatty Liver Disease: Accumulated fat in the liver affects its function.

Sleep Apnea and Breathing Problems: Obesity contributes to sleep apnea and other respiratory issues.

Chronic Lower Back Pain and Arthritis: Excess weight strains joints and worsens osteoarthritis, especially in the knees

Impotence: Excess fat can block arteries supplying the penis and cause erection problems

You are termed overweight if your BMI is more than 25.
Obese if BMI more than 30 .
Normal is 20 - 24.9
BMI is calculated by dividing weight in kg by height in metres squared. BMI=Weight in Kg/ Height in Metres * height in metres.
For example if your weight is 100kg and your height is 2metres. Your BMI will be 100/2*2=100/4=25

Pls calculate your BMI today and work on your weight if you are overweight or obese.

Kindly share with friends and family to save more lives. God bless us all.

Mind your business, Gboro mi ro!
Busy body alatenuje.

Wasted in his fake tshirt.

A bastar...d and lying government.
APC enikuuuuure!

Omo!!!!!

See charred remains?

Subhuhanallah!

Nigeria is a joke. Lol

Caught pants down in the disgraceful act, old fool!

Sapasenator:
Hell Nairalanders,

I have this friend who is madly in love with a sex doll. He is seriouse and considering marriage at this point. Both of them are madly in love.

I tried to persuade him that it was a bad idea but my friend gave the following points for going on with the doll;

1.doll is a virgin
2. Zero body count.
3. Doll looks 25 and will never age.
3. Constant sex anytime without serenren.
4. No in-law wahala
5. She is never going to cheat on my friend.
6. My friend is free to have side cheeks whiteout his wife compaining.
7. Doll is very beautiful.
8. No arguments in the home.
9. Savings money on food at home after marriage.
10. No nagging in the relationship.
11. The doll at least will listen to him when he talks.

Now these are the points raised by my friend and I am inclined to partly agree with him.

Now he promised never to cheat on his doll wife after marriage.

What do you guys think, is my friend crazy?

Ok.

And who are you in love with?

SirLiquidGold:
In 2021, I decided to stay on my on and try to face life and achieve growth as a man. The journey has been challenging, I won't lie but I have been able to learn valuable lessons.
I have been living in a face me I face you since may 2022. When I got there, it was a total different kind of lifestyle.

The landlady particularly called me on the second week I got to the compound. she said I looked gentle which is good but that shouldn't stop me from washing the bathroom and toilet when it's my turn.
I kept wondering what was the similarity between being gentle and washing the toilet?
Well I had no problem complying since it's a normal routine for all tenants.

I had to share bathroom and also toilet. And when it's time to cook, I did that in my room. Sometimes I felt shy and washed in my room then one lady in our house told me my room will be smelling if I keep washing there.
Sometimes they fight over the smallest issues that can be solved with just sorry.
I found it very strange.

To top the whole issue, our compound did not have its own water or well. We had to go to the next street.
Well I thought it wise to be buying things gradually. I bought bed, standing fan and curtains. You know the normal bachelor bachelor's setup.

Then this week, I was able to rent another house which was a room and palor...
Hahahaha I have been walking up and down the house since I moved in. From the kitchen to the palour and to the room then to the bathroom. Sometimes, I'll peep through the windows to look at people passing lol. Don't mind me, I just graduated from living in a house with a single widow to a house with more than 5 windows

I now have easy access to water and I have just been laughing unnecessarily to myself. Well I think it's part of living alone.
I'm going to get pots of flowers and put it infront of my house make we start from there.
Having a spacious apartment is also beautiful. Omo I feel really happy o

Photo of Face-Me-I-Face-You used for illustration

Alhamdullilah.

Mo ba e yo oo!

SpatialKing:
Tinubu

Oponu ni daddy e!

Pseudonym

Valoromega:
I've been married for 2 years now with a new born baby. the issue now is that anytime we have issues my wife always threatens to leave.
she will arrange and bag and say she's leaving. this has happened more tha 4 times, basically anytime we have issues as a couple.

She will say she's still young and she can't take any nonsense in marriage, Mind u i have never hit her before so this isnt a case of domestic violence, just normal couples issue.

I'm tired of this and i'm thinking about my options right now, I want to tell her to leave but she should drop my child for me. she can't use our marriage as a threat everytime we have issues

Let her live bro.
Next time she brings it up, help her pack her bags and show her the door.
Look after yourself, and your kid.
Best wishes.

APC - Bloody propagandists.
Good for nothing evil political party filled with criminals, have no clue about governance and lacking in capacity!
The joke is on the idio....ts hoping on hopelessness.

IzunnaOkafor:
By Izunna Okafor, Awka

A yet-to-be-identified lady has reportedly died in Anambra State after allegedly smoking Colorado, a psychotropic drug, popularly known as “Colos” — the eponym for the popular slang “On Colos”.

The incident reportedly happened over the weekend in Awka, the State capital, where the lady was said to have repeatedly smoked the psychotropic and acted in strange ways before finally giving up the ghost.

This was corroborated by a video and voice note currently trending on the social media about the incident.

While the video shows the lifeless body of the victim lying close to the Y-Junction Axis of the UNIZIK Junction-Okpuno road, the masculine voice note of an eyewitness that accompanies it explained that the she became unconscious and started misbehaving after smoking the dangerous drug, even to the point of perambulating the street stack naked.

This, the eyewitness said, made some sympathizers to hold and assist her with a cloth to cover up her unclothedness. The sympathizers were also said to have fed her with enough soaked garri to douse the effect of the substance on her.

It was however, reported that shortly after she began to regain her consciousness, she went and smoked the Colorado again, which eventually led to her collapse, downfall and consequent death along the ever-busy road.

Her corpse was also said to have been taken away by her people after some passersby recognized her and invited her family members, who came and evacuated her corpse.

When recently contacted by this reporter, Izunna Okafor, the State Commandant of the National Drug Law Enforcement Agency (NDLEA) in Anambra, Mr. Daniel Onyishi described such incident as one of the numerous inherent dangers and consequences of drug abuse and how it destroys the youths.

According to him, Colorado is a psychotropic and one of the dangerous drugs that have rendered and still render many people useless in the society, adding that ‘colos’ is also addictive, while its effect is instantaneous, as it flows straight to the bloodstream, affecting one's mental wellness.

The NDLEA Boss said that such things are what the Agency has been preaching against through its various sensitization programs in secondary schools and other public places in the State, including through the radio program “NDLEA and You” which holds from 11.am to 12.pm every Tuesday on ABS 88.5FM.

“That is why everybody should stay off drugs and join us to fight drug abuse. If you know anyone who uses or deals on drugs, make NDLEA know. People should not be harbouring such persons or take drug as a business,” Onyishi emphatically stated in a telephone interview with this reporter.

Ok.

Awon Oponu Jatijati!
Fools governing, making laws and leading fools who voted or enabled them.
Basta....rds!!

ironheart:
Parents and teachers.

Most teachers teach for the money to survive not for the passion

The schools gives good grades to students so that the parents wouldn't withdraw there wards from the school

You can not discipline children due to the reactions of parents.

Teachers no longer care about students welfare

Some valid points here but you need to understand that even if you teach with all the passion in the world, a student who is destined to fail will FAIL!

If you open head pour books inside am, e no gaurantee pass.

You never see person wey do open book exams still fail woefully?!

Pastor no go kuku talk ni
You wan make hunger bury pastor? Abi pastor no go drive benz? No go like wear Balenciaga wey no be obioma or aba made?
Make una dey play.

Gwomina Barawo Dollar Dey talk!

Even if him hand dey there, e go talk say e dey? Lol

They will probably recover it and some other basta....rds will re-plunder it, with some finding its way back to the thieving bastar...d called Yahaya Bello!
Kogi people are the most docile and idio...tic set of people in Nigeria.
They have been soaked in abject poverty over and over again by a selection of power hungry and brazen good for nothing wankers!

Make them dey take una catch cruise o!

Mtchewwwww.

Alhamdullilah.
Ire akari o.

Cutezt:
A few months ago, a friend told me about an exciting alternative to the ever-increasing DSTV prices - SLTV. Intrigued, I decided to give it a try.

One evening, I rushed home all hyped to catch the UCL action, only to find my subscription expired. Ready to cough up some cash, I recalled the SLTV chat with my friend and thought, "Why not?" So, I decided to explore SLTV

After some digging, I found a bunch of SLTV sites, many of which I realized were incomplete, without much information about the company. but I settled on one that had dealer info and locations at https://metrodigital.tv/find-a-dealer/.

I reached out to a nearby dealer, who initially quoted me 27,500 Naira. Cool, right? Determined to make the switch, I decided to wait until the following week to subscribe as it was the weekend. So next week rolls around, and bam! Dollar rates soar, and suddenly it's N37,500! (This was just a flimsy excuse by the dealer to extort me tho, the price still remains the same according to the company, but I let it slide when I calculated installation fees and all)
Still, compared to DSTV's wallet-draining ways, it seemed reasonable. So, I bit the bullet and called the guy over.

The next day, the dealer arrived promptly and had the SLTV decoder and dish set up in less than 10 minutes. I was thrilled to discover that I could now access all the Supersport channels and more. Eager to learn about the subscription options, I found that the Diamond package was priced at 2,500 Naira, while the Gold package was 5,000 Naira per month. I also learned that SLTV offered a variety of free-to-air channels, but I didn't bother to have the installer set those up for me.

My SLTV Experience

After using SLTV for nearly two months, here is my review.

1. Broadcast Rights:

While I was able to access all Supersport channels without restrictions, I've noticed that SLTV streams a majority of their channels from DSTV and YouTube.

Occasionally, you encounter the DSTV interface and error code on your screen, and also the YouTube auto caption (mostly on CNN) which writes rubbish. This can be discouraging and unprofessional.

I thought about how TSTV vanished into thin air, but I made peace with myself when I decided to view the SLTV installation fee as paying for a DSTV subscription, just in case SLTV later shuts down. After all, I still watch my matches at the end of the day.

The streaming experience can be inconsistent, with lags ranging from a few seconds to up to 2 minutes behind the live action.
Intermittent signal cuts during matches, though not frequent, can disrupt the viewing experience.

Digging a bit deeper, I discovered SLTV has been engaged in a legal battle with DSTV for some time now on sharing its broadcast rights. DSTV initially won the case, but SLTV appealed the judgment in a higher court and won the appeal, However, DSTV has also challenged the judgment, so the case is still ongoing. ( https://www.premiumtimesng.com/news/top-news/542466-court-orders-multichoice-to-sublicense-channels.html?tztc=1 )

The handling of SLTV's social media presence and branding suggests a need for improvement in terms of professionalism, including the employment of a dedicated social media manager and a graphic design team. An instance where SLTV openly called out MultiChoice and included names in a post, I perceived as unprofessional.

As far as customer support is concerned, it is nonexistent! A call to the number listed for support on their website and you will be greeted with 'switched off', I wonder how customer care will be switched off. Their social media support is no different. When you encounter a challenge, your best bet is to get an agent/dealer. That is why it is good to keep subscribing with a particular dealer so as to build a relationship in case you need any help someday.

I was however comforted when I learned of the presence of the Secretary to the Government of the Federation, George Akume, at SLTV's launch. It was an encouraging sign that the platform had the backing of the federal government. This government support has provided a sense of reassurance that SLTV won't leave its viewers "hanging" (at least for the time being).

2. Picture Quality

When tuning in to SLTV for your favorite matches, it's important to consider the picture quality. If you own a large screen TV, especially 50 inches or larger, you might notice that the claimed full HD stations are not actually full HD, possibly around 480p or 720p resolution at best. However, it's worth mentioning that SLTV does offer approximately 2 Supersport channels in full HD. There is room for improvement in enhancing the overall picture quality across their channels.

3. Subscription System.

The affordability of their subscription service is overshadowed by the lack of a functional public subscription system. Despite promoting both an Android app and a website for subscriptions, using these platforms often results in your money vanishing into thin air.

Personal experience attempting to subscribe through the app revealed a disconcerting outcome - while the payment was processed successfully, the subscription failed to activate. Even after contacting an agent who checked my profile for me, no record of the subscription or money could be found. A frustrating situation where payment was made for a subscription that was never received, necessitating an additional payment from me for another subscription.

For a company serious about its operations in 2024, the absence of a reliable subscription system is a significant drawback. Relying on agents for subscription management is an outdated practice that does not align with modern consumer expectations. It is misleading to advertise apps and websites for subscriptions that are not fully operational. Even after subscribing sometime, you will need to call and disturb an agent to refresh your profile for it to start displaying. Further investigation revealed that this subscription issue is widespread among users, not just me, indicating a systemic problem that requires urgent attention.

4. Available Content

While the platform offers a respectable selection of channels, the content is not tailored specifically for the Nigerian audience. For instance, the music stations predominantly feature tunes from across Africa, rather than catering to local Nigerian Audiences as the company claims to focus on providing affordable local content.

Switching to channels like Trace or MTV, you often times encounter unfamiliar songs from East Africa or outdated hip-hop tracks.
The movie selection, although more recent than the outdated offerings on DSTV, still falls short of providing the latest releases. Similarly, the National Geographic and wildlife-focused channels, while present, do not offer the same level of entertainment value and content as the Nat Geo on DSTV. Even tho they are both Nat Geo/Nat Geo Wild, they show different content.

On a positive note, the platform does provide a selection of cartoon channels, such as Nickelodeon, to cater to the entertainment needs of children, as well as Nigerian Movies from Hausa, Yoruba, Igbo, Epic, and Urban movie channels.

In summary, SLTV may be a suitable option for football lovers with screen sizes of 40 inches or less, who are not overly concerned with picture quality. However, for those seeking a more tailored content experience and crisp visual quality, DSTV may remain the preferred choice.

I hope to provide a more detailed video review of SLTV before the end of the week. Please feel free to drop comments if you have any further questions.

Talo bere ejo weyrey lowo e?

Anything for Chagoury and his gang!

Una think say nah charity when he dey blow money for France to keep your fraudulent president alive? Lol

Subhuhannallah!

Is he going to sack himself as well? Because the buck stops at his desk in terms of responsibility and performance.

Palapala yi needs to stop or else our kids are in trouble.

Apple will learn to start using dummy phones to advertise on the shop floor soon.

Interesting15:
First of all, the modern boyfriend-girlfriend romantic relationship thing is not in God's original Will, which explains why it is one of the major contributors to the high increase in heartaches and emotional headaches prevalent amongst many young people. As far as getting a partner is concerned, this is what to follow:

The Will of God is that when a man (not a boy) has attained a certain stature where marriage can be embraced, (after such a man has discovered his identity and purpose on earth), He (God) should be approached to provide a woman (not a girl) who will become his wife. After God has provided the woman, prior to marriage, the couple embarks on what we call courtship, where they learn to know more about themselves (in an attempt to make necessary adjustments before they tie the knot), and must not defile the marriage bed during the courting period (that is, must not indulge in premarital sex).

Now, let's say you have been ignorant of this, and due to whatever reason (loneliness, peer pressure, etc) you now have a boyfriend or girlfriend who is insisting that you start having sex when not being married. Well, that is proof that you should discard such a person since it is obvious they are only after your body and their lustful immediate gratification, and they don't really love you as you think.

It is important to not allow anyone to make you sin against God for whatever reason, irrespective of how hard they are trying to make you feel they love you (they don't really love you if they are trying to make you rebel against God your Source).

God's perfect Will as far as sexual pleasure is concerned is that all forms of sexual pleasure should only be shared between a married man and his female wife inside the safe confines of their marriage institution, with no other party involved.


To avoid the emotional heartaches and headaches a lot of young people experience due to their romantic entanglements with a member of the opposite gender, the best path to take is to do things God's way. When you are set for a relationship with a member of the opposite gender, make sure you are going into it with marriage in view, and both of you must agree not to do things meant for married couples alone - such as sex. If the person won't agree with you, it shows they don't really love you in the first place, and you don't have a place in their longterm plans. They only planned to suck you dry before dumping you and moving to the next victim.


You are a child of God (whether you currently have a relationship with Him or not), not a mere sex tool. Before you were born God has demonstrated His love for you by coming in the Person of Jesus Christ to die for your sins (you were born into sin) and redeemed you to Himself. He wants an intimate relationship with you that is eternal in nature, and you will be empowered with the Holy Ghost to live above corruption for all of eternity.

Jesus loves you.

My friend shut up and go to bed.

Was this illegal president not in Saudi last month?
Kini certificate forger and drug baron wa kaaa kiri?

Bunch of fools.
As if its Umahi's father's money!
Fu...cking idio....ts who should be thanking taxpayers are busy sniffing and licking each other's butts!
Basta......rd leaders.