k

funny

3. The Mom
No, this girl is not a mom, she just reminds you of your mom. You don’t realize it at first because you were enjoying her cooking too much. Slowly her comforting nature becomes slightly familiar. She begins to use expressions your mom uses and starts doing motherly things like laying your clothes out for you and packing your lunches with notes inside. Although you are able to handle the good aspects of dating a girl like your mom, everything changes when the two women in your life meet. They are so alike that your girlfriend can no longer arouse you because you will only be able to think about your mom every time you see her…not sexy.

2. The Sweetheart

She is legitimately the sweetest girl you have ever met. Your friends and family adore her and she always manages to make you feel good about yourself. She is a veterinarian or a grade school teacher and she honestly has not one bad bone in her body. You are completely enamored by her sweetness however her innocent bliss becomes slightly annoying. You miss the challenge of being with an opinionated woman. Breaking up with her is one of the hardest breakups you were ever part of and when you see her months later she completely shuns you. That is the thing about sweet girls, they sour easily.

1. THE BITCH

We saved the bitch for last because we didn’t want to insult her.
You love her because everyone fears her and dating her is like
being with an evil a box of chocolates, you never know what you
are going to get. The bitch usually comes from money and her
parents have never disciplined her. Your friends hate her, your
parents hate her and every waiter that has ever served the two
of you hates her, but you couldn’t care less. You are so
mesmerized by her brutal honesty and ability to scare people
that you don’t even realize how whipped you have become. After
her brief spell begins to fade you start to see how emasculating
she really is and even though it is the best sex of your life, you
need to cut to cord quick or you will end up marrying the bitch.

WIN FROM PROMOTIONAL OFFERS IN NIGERIA VISIT
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5 . The Brain

You meet this girl at the library or bookstore and you are immediately attracted to her exquisite mind. At first you find the intellectual challenge to be a turn on, almost as if every time she speaks you fall deeper in love. The problem is that the fact that she is so much smarter than you makes you feel as though you are not good enough. You constantly find yourself wondering if what you are saying makes sense and you are afraid to show any sign of stupidity. As much as this girl motivates you, you will never be able to be yourself around her, which ultimately ends your relationship.

4 . The Insecure One

This girl is the definition of insecure. She is obsessed with her weight and is always comparing herself to models. She is constantly asking if “you find her prettier than me” every time you glance in the direction of another girl. She freaks out when you are out and convinces herself that you are going to find someone better. She doesn’t realize or accept how much you really like her and after a while it becomes exhausting trying to make her see in herself what you see in her. The two of you eventually part ways but you always think of what it would have been like had she been a little more confident.

8 . The Crazy One

You don’t even know how you met this girl, she just sort of appeared in your life. After a month of dating she has redecorated your apartment, told you she loves you and has already spent hours on the phone with your mother discussing your childhood. The thing about the crazy ones is they are usually the hottest girls. You can differentiate a crazy-hot girl from a hot-crazy girl by looking at their eyes. Crazy girls have crazy eyes. There is nothing specific about crazy eyes, it's one of those “you know it when you see it” things. You date her only because you fear what she will do when you break up with her. Eventually you can't take it anymore and you let her down as easy as possible, which doesn’t help. She goes nuts either breaking something you love or trying to hurt you, either way it's worth it to get the "crazy one" out of your life.

7 . The Athletic One
You meet this girl at the gym or while the two of you are training
for a marathon. Although her face isn’t incredible her body is
outstanding which instantly draws you to her. Her perfectly
shaped ass and toned body makes you dream about what it
would be like to sleep with her. She works as either a yoga
instructor or a spin teacher. However, her obsession with fitness
slowly becomes a problem when you realize that she is stronger
than you. She forbids you from eating fattening foods and more
importantly forbids you from drinking beer, she even uses the
expression “empty calories.” You eventually snap at some vegan
restaurant and break up with her. The worst part about the
breakup is that now you need to find a new gym.


: 6 . The Promiscuous One
This girl has either slept with one of your friends or a family
member, and for some reason you thought you could change her.
You date her because you genuinely like her, however it worries
you that she cheated on her last boyfriend with you. However,
the two of you end up dating for longer than anyone thought you
would and you have genuine feelings for her. The one thing you
don’t like about her is that every party you go to, you feel as if
someone in the room has slept with her, and you feel that way
because it is probably true. You guys ended breaking up the
same way you began dating, however this time you are the
douche she cheated on.

As a man, you will find yourself dating a variety of women. It is rare to find your perfect match at a young age, and most people need to date around in order to find the right person for them. Many think that men are different from women in the sense that they aren’t looking for “the one.” They may not have been dreaming about their wedding day since before they can remember, but all guys want to eventually find the perfect girl for them. However, there are so many different kinds of girls, so we narrowed it down to the girls you are guaranteed to come across and most likely date throughout your single years. There are countless reasons why relationships don’t work and most of them boil down to compatibility. Men are not as quick when it comes to reading the opposite sex as women, so sometimes it takes them a bit longer to figure out how horribly wrong a girl is for them. The girl you end up with may have little qualities of each of these next categories but she will have the perfect amount of each for you. There is nothing wrong with enjoying to party or being a bit nerdy, however it all depends what kind of girl you are looking for. The following categories of girls are guaranteed to remind you of someone you know. If you are discouraged in your attempt at finding the perfect girl, don’t be, she is out there. Just keep on dating and you will know she is right once you find her.

http://www.therichest.com/expensive-lifestyle/lifestyle/12-girls-youll-date-before-finding-the-one/


12. The Party Girl

You meet this girl at some over-priced club one night as she is
dancing on the table. You strike up a conversation after she
stumbles past you. The two of you start taking shots together and
next thing you know you are making out like teenagers. Every
time you see her she is wearing something tight or short, or tight
and short. Every song that comes on the radio is “her song” and
she has no problem blasting it in her Mercedes-Benz. You will
date this girl for a bit until you realize she is not wife material
and you will end things. She will be sad at first, but history will
eventually repeat itself when she meets her next victim at the
club.

11 . The Snob
You meet this girl somewhere pretentious like an art exhibit or a poetry reading. After a short amount of seeing each other you begin to notice her trying to change you. She is condescending towards both you and your friends and never appears satisfied. Regardless of what present you buy her, she never seems to be happy. She bases everything on monetary belongings and after a while her good looks fade and her shallow and snobbish core is exposed. You try and help her find joy in the simpler things in life and after a while her demanding behavior becomes exhausting and you run for the hills.

10 . The “ One Night Stand ”

The danger with having a one night stand is having one that turns into a relationship. You meet this girl when you are belligerently drunk and your standards are no longer existent. You wake up in the morning with no recollection on who she is or how she got in your bed. She is sweet, kind and a little slutty and the two of you date for a while regardless of how little the two of you have in common. When you decide to break up with her you are in shock with how badly she takes it. Although you may not remember the first night you guys met, she does and for her it will always be the most special night of her single life.

9 . The One Who is Out of Your League
She is sweet and kind and she is that perfect mix of sexy and cute. You meet her in class and her sweet nature instantly draws you in. The only problem is that every man that meets her is drawn to her. The two of you date and she is totally into you, yet you have no idea why. Every time you guys go anywhere, you feel as if everyone around you is wondering what she can possibly see in you. After a few months your jealousy and insecurity begins to get the best of you and she eventually breaks up with you because she can’t handle it. The worst part is that the next chump she dates is even worse than you!

rep Ogun

lollypop is cool bro

If you are using contextual advertisement and not making enough that ways, you should try moving to direct advertisement or affiliate advertisement. Apart from traditional form of Advertising, work on other monetization trick which works. Instead of just adding ads, work on adding value for your advertiser. It’s better to have 1 high paying ad than 4 low paying ad units.

1. Viglink
I got to know about this network in starting of 2013. If you are using any type of In-text advertising, get rid of it and install Viglink. This ad network will let you monetize your outbound link.

2. Affiliate Advertisement

Affiliate advertisement is one of the best way to make money , since a single sale will make 10-100$ for you.

3. Referral Income : Most of advertisement program like Chitika, infolinks and many others have pay per referral program. Depend on advertisement program you are using, you can look for referral program and refer your readers to that program. This will quickly add some quick dollar in your pocket. Make sure refer to that programs only which work. Though this will work on niche which talks about make money online or blogging.



4.Direct Advertisement :
No doubt adsense is best advertisement program for bloggers but again it has some limitations like you will not get paid 100% from advertisers and adsense keep a great cut in between. If you manage to grab direct advertisements , replace adsense with direct advertisements. You can try buysellads for direct advertisements. For me it’s most performing advertisement program. You should also have a detailed advertisement page for your blog.

5. Paid reviews :
Paid reviews are again a great way to boost your monthly income report. You can quickly make anything above 10$ for a small review post. Though there are few things which you need to take care before reviewing a product.

6. Create and sell eBook:
If you will notice the business model of most of top internet marketer, most of them sell eBooks. For Bloggers like you and me, it’s easier to create eBook by using your existing blog content. All you need to do is, pick a topic, compile an eBook on that topic and put it on sale on your blog or on Amazon. Once you are use to this process, in no time you can earn decent amount of money by selling books online. More over, having your own product to sale is the best thing that you could do for your passive income.

7. Services :
Start running your own set of services. Depending on what are you good at, like you can start content writing services, start logo creation services and so on.

Few years back blogging was just another hobby but a lot has changed in past few years. This is 2015 and now blogging is one of the great online business that anyone can take advantage of. I started as a blogger in 2008 and in last 7 years blogging has gifted my a new house (Worth 10 million), A car and many more things which I would not have achieved with my day to day job as a blogger.

As a blogger, gone are those days, when we were dependent only on AdSense to earn money online, and now we have many more ad networks and monetization method, which we can implement and earn huge from our blogs.

If you have been using those traditional method of making money from your blog, it’s time to give a new vision and revise your Blogging business plan. Make some new tweaks, changes for design and marketing of your blog. Work hard to promote your blog and integrate new ways to earn from your blog.

Specially, after Penguin update and Page layout algo update, my suggestion is to get rid of those Ad networks which are not performing well on your blog. For example, Infolinks is a good ad network for a Tech blog, but for a Webmaster blog like ShoutMeLoud, it does more harm as it takes away visitors for few clicks. Simply, if one affiliate network is not working for you, time to try out new network and see how it perform. In this guide, I will be sharing how you can earn money from blog using ads and few more ways which is being used by top earning bloggers.

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kill chicken

so sad

6.STAR BEER
5. MTN NIGERIA
4. JUMIA


MORE @ http://promo9ja.com

10. Virgin Atlantic
As part of its “Flying in the Face of Ordinary” campaign, in
March Virgin Atlantic decided to send its marketing team and
cabin crew members to cheer up people in Boston by making
special deliveries and doing good deeds for people who weren’t
having the best of days. The airline brand looked at its Twitter
followers to find people in Boston tweeting about things like
having to wait in the snow for a train or other everyday
annoyances. The Virgin Atlantic team reached out to these
people via Twitter direct messages to locate them and arrange
things like delivering 100 cupcakes to a blogger and his
coworkers and giving a women a ride to a business meeting
and preparing her for the cold with a pair of gloves and a hat.
Virgin Atlantic brought this effort to other cities too, like
Washington and New York.

9. Samsung
Last August, Samsung customer Shane Bennett took to Facebook
to ask the mobile phone brand for a free Galaxy X3. Bennett
also included a cute drawing of a dinosaur going “rawr,” you
know, for brownie points. Samsung responded playfully
explaining why it couldn’t give him a free phone and also
included a drawing of a kangaroo on a unicycle to return the
drawing favor. The whole exchange obviously ended up on
Reddit and created a lot of positive buzz for Samsung, so
Samsung ended up actually giving Bennett a free Galaxy X3
with a custom design: Bennett’s dinosaur drawing. That’s a
pretty awesome gift from a brand.

8. GLOBACOM NIGERIA
Globacom recently give out Mercedes benz G-Wagon to one of this loyal customer
as grand prize, an all-
expense paid trip for 10 subscribers to the UK to watch a live Manchester United
match and N10,000 airtime for 1000 subscribers. glo is making it big for Nigerian and am proud of them

7. GULDER
Gulder is giving viewers of Africa’s first and longest running reality TV show, Gulder Ultimate Search, the opportunity of participating in the reality TV programme and also winning prizes via the Viewers’ Choice.

Brands often ask fans for likes, shares and follows on social
media. Sometimes, to show their thanks, brands do cool and
unexpected things to give back to their social media fans.
More than any online interactions, it’s these instances of
brands turning online relationships into real-life experiences
for their fans and followers that make brands seem more
human. Check out these ten examples of brands that found
ways to surprise and reward their fans in real life. None of
these examples are grand productions. It just shows that even
small gestures from brands to their fans can create a large
impact.
Many Nigerian makes a living from promotional offers and am one of them

I WISH HER LUCK

Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie Nominated For Grammy Award With Beyoncé

Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie, critically acclaimed Nigerian novelist and award-winning author of Americanah has been nominated for a Grammy award for her feminist-inspired collaboration with American entertainer Beyonce, on her 2013 track "Flawless."

Following her TEDx talk on why “We Should All Be Feminists,” Beyonce incorporated the writer’s essay into her single, which further brought more life to her craft.

Adichie, whose work has been translated into thirty languages, has also appeared in various publications, including The New Yorker, Granta, The O. Henry Prize Stories, the Financial Times, and Zoetrope.

Adichie has also received several awards and distinctions, including the Orange Broadband Prize for Fiction in 2007 and a MacArthur Foundation Fellowship in 2008.

This nomination for “Album of the Year” with her fellow feminist is just yet another achievement for the writer.

The robot revolution may be gentler than we thought. We're not sure if the robotic staff at a planned hotel in Japan will be tucking guests into their beds at night, but they'll be performing plenty of other traditional hospitality tasks.
Huis Ten Bosch, a theme park modeled after the Netherlands in Japan's
Nagasaki Prefecture, has announced plans to open a hotel with robot staff and
other advanced technologies.

The hotel will be called Henn-na Hotel , which translates as Strange Hotel.
According to the park, the first phrase of the two-story hotel will open on July
17 with 72 rooms.
The second phrase will be completed in 2016 with an additional 72 rooms.
Operating under the motto "A commitment for evolution," the hotel will feature
three "actroids" (robots with strong human likeness) that will act as
receptionists. They'll be able to engage in intelligent conversations with human guests. The hotel will also employ four service and porter robots, and others engaged in menial tasks such as cleaning. High-tech features keep prices low
"We'll make the most efficient hotel in the world," boasts Huis Ten Bosch
president Hideo Sawada .
Sawada says he hopes robots will eventually run 90% of the property.
"In the future, we're hoping to build 1,000 similar hotels around the world," says
Sawada, according to Japan's Nikkei News.
Other features will help make Henn-na the most futuristic low-cost hotel in the
industry, according to the company.
Guestroom doors will be accessed by facial-recognition technology.
Amenities provided in rooms will be kept minimal. Guests can request items
through a tablet when needed.
Instead of air-conditioning, a radiation panel will detect body heat in rooms and
adjust the temperature.
Solar power and other energy-saving features will be used to reduce operating
costs.
Bid for your room
Room rates will vary depending on demand.
Instead of being presented with a fixed price, guests will bid for rooms during
peak season. The highest bidders will secure rooms, though there will be a price
cap on bidding.
The hotel says room fees at opening will be from JPY7,000 ($60) for a single
room to JPY18,000 ($153), the highest possible price after bidding, for a triple
room.
Superior and deluxe rooms will cost more.
http://edition.cnn.com/2015/02/04/travel/japan-hotel-robots/index.html

Some freshers in noun abk center never cease amusing me..
You are under -20 age, you haven't tried jamb once, u think noun na beans, you
hop down from your destination down to school here, at the first of the week on ur
dp says Olumo things, following week na halmod stadium loading things, the 3rd
week na gallileon lounge club loading.....
Some are even sleeping around with men for sake of helping them to solve the
tutor marked assigment that is not even yet out sef.
You met a guy who is deceiving you that noun is easy, exam is superb and your
grade is on green certainty, fool u will experience it when u enter the hall at april
naw, don't read well, your body go tell you.
And those of you who is paying people for tma , its a pity that you can't solve tma
your self, definately your project na angel go write ham for you.
You are too pretty, cox of you men are hitting there selves, bottles are smaching
eaching other on air, you turn your self to kim kadashan, trust me you go wash
yeye oniranu..
Your turn tutorial class to fashon parade, your bodi go tell you when you see 5f9
5D.. Don't read, you see old men and women in noun with glasess reading hard,
and you are roaming the school writting school things on point, we go see who is
on point at the end of july.
Happy sunday.

feel ur pain guy

The robot revolution may be gentler than we thought. We're not sure if the robotic staff at a planned hotel in Japan will be tucking guests into their beds at night, but they'll be performing plenty of other traditional hospitality tasks.
Huis Ten Bosch, a theme park modeled after the Netherlands in Japan's
Nagasaki Prefecture, has announced plans to open a hotel with robot staff and
other advanced technologies.

The hotel will be called Henn-na Hotel , which translates as Strange Hotel.
According to the park, the first phrase of the two-story hotel will open on July
17 with 72 rooms.
The second phrase will be completed in 2016 with an additional 72 rooms.
Operating under the motto "A commitment for evolution," the hotel will feature
three "actroids" (robots with strong human likeness) that will act as
receptionists. They'll be able to engage in intelligent conversations with human guests. The hotel will also employ four service and porter robots, and others engaged in menial tasks such as cleaning. High-tech features keep prices low
"We'll make the most efficient hotel in the world," boasts Huis Ten Bosch
president Hideo Sawada .
Sawada says he hopes robots will eventually run 90% of the property.
"In the future, we're hoping to build 1,000 similar hotels around the world," says
Sawada, according to Japan's Nikkei News.
Other features will help make Henn-na the most futuristic low-cost hotel in the
industry, according to the company.
Guestroom doors will be accessed by facial-recognition technology.
Amenities provided in rooms will be kept minimal. Guests can request items
through a tablet when needed.
Instead of air-conditioning, a radiation panel will detect body heat in rooms and
adjust the temperature.
Solar power and other energy-saving features will be used to reduce operating
costs.
Bid for your room
Room rates will vary depending on demand.
Instead of being presented with a fixed price, guests will bid for rooms during
peak season. The highest bidders will secure rooms, though there will be a price
cap on bidding.
The hotel says room fees at opening will be from JPY7,000 ($60) for a single
room to JPY18,000 ($153), the highest possible price after bidding, for a triple
room.
Superior and deluxe rooms will cost more.
http://edition.cnn.com/2015/02/04/travel/japan-hotel-robots/index.html

The robot revolution may be gentler than we thought. We're not sure if the robotic staff at a planned hotel in Japan will be tucking guests into their beds at night, but they'll be performing plenty of other traditional hospitality tasks.
Huis Ten Bosch, a theme park modeled after the Netherlands in Japan's
Nagasaki Prefecture, has announced plans to open a hotel with robot staff and
other advanced technologies.

The hotel will be called Henn-na Hotel , which translates as Strange Hotel.
According to the park, the first phrase of the two-story hotel will open on July
17 with 72 rooms.
The second phrase will be completed in 2016 with an additional 72 rooms.
Operating under the motto "A commitment for evolution," the hotel will feature
three "actroids" (robots with strong human likeness) that will act as
receptionists. They'll be able to engage in intelligent conversations with human guests. The hotel will also employ four service and porter robots, and others engaged in menial tasks such as cleaning. High-tech features keep prices low
"We'll make the most efficient hotel in the world," boasts Huis Ten Bosch
president Hideo Sawada .
Sawada says he hopes robots will eventually run 90% of the property.
"In the future, we're hoping to build 1,000 similar hotels around the world," says
Sawada, according to Japan's Nikkei News.
Other features will help make Henn-na the most futuristic low-cost hotel in the
industry, according to the company.
Guestroom doors will be accessed by facial-recognition technology.
Amenities provided in rooms will be kept minimal. Guests can request items
through a tablet when needed.
Instead of air-conditioning, a radiation panel will detect body heat in rooms and
adjust the temperature.
Solar power and other energy-saving features will be used to reduce operating
costs.
Bid for your room
Room rates will vary depending on demand.
Instead of being presented with a fixed price, guests will bid for rooms during
peak season. The highest bidders will secure rooms, though there will be a price
cap on bidding.
The hotel says room fees at opening will be from JPY7,000 ($60) for a single
room to JPY18,000 ($153), the highest possible price after bidding, for a triple
room.
Superior and deluxe rooms will cost more.
http://edition.cnn.com/2015/02/04/travel/japan-hotel-robots/index.html

Just imagine....if you were the CEO of the largest network in Nigeria, what could you achieve using the internet?

Now, tell us in not more than 50 words, using the power of the internet, what you would do as the CEO of MTN Nigeria?

Winners with the best BUSINESS ideas would win exciting prizes and actually get to meet the CEO of MTN Nigeria!

#mtnbetterme #ceo4aday

https://m.facebook.com/MTNLoaded/photos/a.147244335289983.29218.130488246965592/1018222874858787/?type=1&theater

Give yourself a treat this valentine!

(a) Play and win big on WWTBAM
(b) Win an exclusive night treat in a 5 star hotel
(c) Have a cozy dinner date for just the two of you
(d) Go see any movie of your choice at the cinema

To stand a chance of winning any of these options and play in the Hot seat with Frank Edoho, simply send VS to 132 from your MTN line.

The more SMS you send, the higher your chances of being selected.
Open to legally married couples only