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Sparro:


What about been disowned?
This question confirms that you are still a kid. You are still in the incubator of your parents. You have not seen and passed through hard times. You are not yet responsible for yourself. You are still relishing the warm love and protection of your parents. No wonder the girl is more mature and daring than you.

If you have passed through all these stages, you will surely know that disowning someone for taking a stance is irrelevant. The negative aspect of disowning me is if I turn out to be useless. If am not sure of where am going, I won't give them the chance to disown me. But if am sure I will turn out well, if am sure of my love for the girl and if been with the girl makes me happy and fulfilled, they can disown me a 1000x.

After disowning you, in few years time, they will beg to see you. They will kill cow to celebrate your return. Everybody wants to be friends with success. Just make sure you don't live a reckless life. The girl will do anything to make you successful. She will go to any lengths to make you very wealthy. Make sure to manage her love and money well. U don't know how lucky you are.

But if you are not happy with the girl or if you don't love her, pls, free her.

If you can't get over other girls and if there are many girls who make you happy, if this particular girl is not special or unique to you in any way, pls, free her.
If you are still fantasising the company and love of other girls because you are intelligent and handsome, pls, free her. If you think you are too good for just one girl, pls, free her. If you think you will come across better girls that are more pretty or rich or intelligent, pls free her. If your mind skip a bit in the negative direction at the sight or thought of the girl, pls, free her. Finally, if you are not sure of the future with her, pls and pls, free her.

Think before you act

Thanks so much for the piece of advice, but i laugh at the part that, where u wrote, am still in the incubator of my parent, have been living alone with my junior brother since I was 15 years, In the couple of months I will be 30, so am the independent type,

my coming here to seek for advice doesn't render one a fool, anyone can be in this situation,

I so much appreciate ur side view of the issue.

Preciousgirl:
My 30 year old brother is going to marry a 43 year old woman. The woman is never married before and has no kids but been in 7 different past relationships.

I am not endorsing this, what do you advise?

But, aside the age differences, is there any reason why u are against the Union?, If not, in as much as the lady can still produce (bear children) and both are financially buoyant, then they are goos to go,

My Perspective though.

Sparro:

Sit down for a minute and pick the signal that flashes through your mind in a millisecond.

The signal is either 'yay' or 'nay'

Guys, generally, don't receive same level of love signal as girls. When a girl is in love, she throws cautions to the air. She can do anything to have her man in her arms but guys feel choky and little uninterested.

For the record, any guy that God wants to make very great, he attaches him to a girl who sees him as her soul mate. If the devil want to punish you, he will make you feel choky and a bit less interested in the girl. You think you are handsome and the world will always rotate around you ba? Hmmmmmm

My brother, let me reiterate, if you loose that girl, you will regret it

Pay a little more attention to my comments. Did I ever mention religion? Religion is immaterial.

Thanks so much bro, But what about been disowned BT our parents ? the danger that associate with it.

adewale6588:


u lost contact or something went wrong btw u2...

u mean u guys lost contact in 2013/14 since then there was no better ways of reaching each other, only for her to hit you up on facebook now in 2020.

and after good 6/7years u start to fool each.

you both lived a normal live in the past few years but now after few month reunion people cannot let go of each other... superstory lon so jere.

becareful no dey come nairaland n com dey post iranu for here

Bro, so u mean I can just imagine coming to nairaland to put down this much epistle, what did I stand to gain in it,

anyway, am the one in the situation, and I know the kind of heat am feeling here.

CliffordAde:



I believe you are a Yorùbá and you know who an ọba is. Don't impregnate daughter of an ọba nor should you run away with her. Both of you should be patient and allow issues to be solved before you go ahead.

Besides, you guys reconnected back like a month ago as you put it, that means Corona infested month and you guys have accelerated discussion to the point of marriage. Have you solved your womanising issue? Marriage or love can't make you stop it, it takes a lot of growing up to do.

She's a princess, that means a lot so don't try anything rash for the sake of your future and this who have invested heavily on you.

Ohh, thanks so much bro, as for my flirt life, is a normal thing for a guy at his early twenty, and, at this stage and level of mine, have put an end to that, of which she even said it by herself,

zyzxx:
the issue I am seeing here is the word "convert" like former governor of Oyo State Abiola Ajumobi, he is a Muslim and his wife is a Christian, so just let each parent knows that each of you will stick to your religion...

So after marriage you guys can know how to balance things

Well that my advice as a person
But biblically oo, we are not permitted to marry an unbeliever

Exactly bro, even both our parents are against.

Gander:

Fountain university is a Islamic faith-based university. So this said woman obviously has more than enough good Muslim men to choose from.
But op want us to believe that the lady wants them to abscond. Bla bla bla.
I don’t believe this op is telling the truth.

I will rather divert my time into something profitable. than writing this epistle for joke sake, Bro, this is a serious matter, that gives me headache on a daily basis.

HeavenlyHolines:
I would have loved us to have a chat or one on one conversation so that u don't lead other youths to hell with ur decision. It might not only be in marriage but other areas. Your position is very sensitive n u know youths love to imitate those they respect a lot. Don't follow what d multitude is saying or the general norms in the society. Stick to the bible. There r many virtuous ladies. Pray that God should open ur eyes. Marriage is deeper than d way we understand it oo. It's beyond the natural. I wish I can tell u a lot. If u need more counsel, u can DM so that we can talk

Okay, bro, may be u should send me ur WhatsApp line, so we can further our discussion there or u message me, 08147363508

segun18:


My person English language no be our mother tongue now abi na wetin...Abeg get well jare..

Am not the English freak type, am an accountant by education, do with me like that,

doubleportion:
Then become a Muslim since you're in love!

NEVER!!. I can't convert to a Muslim, am the youth pastor in my church.

Sparro:


Bro, her parents will never disturb your parents, ever. If for anything, your absconding will bond both families to make sure you people don't take things to the extreme.

On the brighter side, u r a very lucky dude. Mark my words, if you loose that girl, u will regret it. For now, you will take her for granted but wait till u loose her

So u mean we should arrange on how to leave the country.

Faysuze:
I was dating a muslim guy last year, during one of our discussions he told me he must make sure he gets married to a muslim lady. I didn't question him. I ended it few weeks later without telling him why.

I don't like complications.

it obvious the guy doesn't love u right from the onset, he might just using u for one advantage best known to him.

HeavenlyHolines:
Na so oo that is the best. I wonder how people see life especially this marriage of a thing. Some people will b comparing politicians or celebrity who are Moslems but married Christians or Moslem. The bible is our perfect guide and Jesus is our model. Coz u might b surprise that u will have a moral marriage here n wen u get to d other side of life,u will shock that ur name is not in the book of life. And don't have this mentality that I will change her as if they are the Holy spirit. Humans r the most difficult creature to change without God.
As for love,you don't understand what love is about. If u know the number of demons that want to set u up with this kind of marriage,u will back out. Read about the love Abnom had for Tamar,it was later when he had done everything he knew it was lust n obsession. He died untimely n lost the throne. This will help. Romans 1:28 And even as they did not like to retain God in their knowledge, God gave them over to a reprobate mind, to do those things which are not convenient;

Am even the youth pastor in my Church, our G.O love me so much, am afraid of render those people love on me useless, Very confused...

GBOKASINCHA:
where are you from?? Are you yoruba?? I thought dem say Yoruba Muslim Dey intermarry with Christians without problem

We are both Yoruba, am the Christian, while she is the Muslim

stuffs4me:
Teebaba30, as a Christian you are not qualified to marry a Muslim lady and your girlfriend knows that.

You as a Christian will bring nothing but moral bankruptcy to the Muslim lady.

Carry your evil ways and go and meet your fellow kind and leave that Muslim lady alone.

This is kinda harsh fellow, why the statement, Carry ur evils ways"
Anyway it is well.

emerged01:
@teebaba30,your story was exactly like mine.
We made it happen 2012,now we have two lovely boys, don’t let religion be barrier. Though it takes pure understanding from both partners to have a lovely marriage life,most especially from your partner because she will spend time more with the kids.
My wife is very supportive and a good mother to our kids,though we have not achieved all we aim for but if I had put religion first,I don’t think the impart of her intelligence on my kids would ever be possible with anyone else. Don’t let religion make you lose a true partner. If you lose her you may have a rough journey with someone else.
There was a day,my son was given a take home on bible knowledge. My wife snapped the assignment and sent to me through WhatsApp because she doesn’t have deep bible knowledge. I sent her a part of the bible that she needed to read to get the assignment done,of which she did without given my boy a concern about our religious difference. I believe with understanding it will be a smooth journey for both of you.
If both parents realize our serious both of you are,I believe they will eventually give in. At first my wife’s father turned down her request to marry me but a year after her father couldn’t but supported her. Be smart don’t let anybody give you a reason ( religion) to quit a beautiful relationship when you have a good reason (love) to hold onto your future partner.

Thanks so much, so u mean u get wedded out of ur parents wish then?
And they didn't come to scatter the wedding. or turn back to either of u. ?

cynhamscakes:
You were put of contact for seven good years so how did you date her for 11years?

Looks like a script abeggi.

Since we didn't break up, we only lost contact, then, so it easy for us to continued our relationship,

don't think I can take my time to write fake long epistle of this nature,

This is what is killing me gradually here.

Vasgas:


AMP:Now Abraham was old, well advanced in years, and the Lord had blessed Abraham in all things.
2
MP:And Abraham said to the eldest servant of his house [Eliezer of Damascus], who ruled over all that he had, I beg of you, put your hand under my thigh;

AMP:And you shall swear by the Lord, the God of heaven and earth, that you will not take a wife for my son from the daughters of the Canaanites, among whom I have settled,

MP:But you shall go to my country and to my relatives and take a wife for my son Isaac.

AMP:The servant said to him, But perhaps the woman will not be willing to come along after me to this country. Must I take your son to the country from which you came?
6
MP:Abraham said to him, See to it that you do not take my son back there.

7
AMP:The Lord, the God of heaven, Who took me from my father’s house, from the land of my family and my birth, Who spoke to me and swore to me, saying, To your offspring I will give this land—He will send His Angel before you, and you will take a wife from there for my son.

8
AMP:And if the woman should not be willing to go along after you, then you will be clear from this oath; only you must not take my son back there.



Bro, it's even better for him to remain unmarried than to consider marrying an unbeliever....

Thanks so much, bro, so u mean I should forfeit the relationship?

tyisrael:
. Pls end the relationship. Love alone doesn't sustain marriage trust me. I have been in ur shoes b4. U need parental approval and blessings.

Exactly, cos I can't stand to be disowned by my parents, neither too

blackfase:
Religion, scam of centuries past and present. Dont let some stoopid religion deprive you of your hapiness. Baring any personal differences you two may have, pls make yourselves happy. Only brainwashed zombies allow some stupid religion to hold them down. We all were born free.

Again, religion na scam!!!

Thanks so much brother

oshorstan:
I have this feeling that my Fiancee is following me on this thread. Babe I know you read my response on every thread n u know the thread that will interest me. Well I thank God for you and what u can do if we find ourselves in this position. I will gladly elope with her to a different location. I dislike religion. I have every right to choose my religion as a citizen, I am not a robot

Yes we once agreed to travel out of country, of which she even ready to foot the bill, but wot of disturbance from parent to my parents,

Vasgas:


This few words of yours is a summary of what I am about to say.

Love alone does not sustain a marriage, its might sustain a courtship to some extend but not marriage.
You need to have the same belief in order to flow well at the end.
Be careful lest you allow emotions to cover your eyes.
How can a Christan date a Muslim?
is it that there is no Christan lady you are compatible with?

imagine

Ohhh, not like that, We never thought religion could now stand as barrier ,then when we started...

gunners160:
why can't the both of you stick to your various religion without the other person trying to covert the other?
must their be convertion self? Una just dey make a mountain out of a hill

Yes I once concluded to go in line with this idea, but when we both think of our kids, there will be serious problem in which one to choose. of follow.

davidadenrele:
Brotherly,

Pls follow your heart, women don't have religion if she's yours she will give in to your religion peacfully without been forced IAM a living proof, but while planning to exit, the country there should be one elderly person your both parent respected that will make them see reasons, one of the major problems of Nigeria today is religion, i attend a Muslim secondary school owned by late Chief M.K.O Abiola in Osiele about 30 years ago in Abeokuta till today most of my good friends are muslims, and we still get in touch from time to time until we stop this discrimation we will not move forward above all pray and fast over this issue there's nothing God cannot do. All the best.

DA.

Thanks so much bro,

Concern the prayer , we are now very strong in that now, she can never do a day without waking me up in the mid night with a phone call to pray, all centering on our parents to calm and support our mindset.

Sparro:
She is way smarter and she is the one really in love. From the antecedents to the present situation, owing to her suggestion and readiness to foot all bills, she is the one in love. If you love her as half, u wouldn't have objected to her plans.

Truly she's really in love, but the religion barrier keep scared me, cos travelling out of country, wot if her parent starts disturbing my parents

Kingstanding:
. Asiwaju Bola Tinubu is a Muslim and his wife is a pastor in Redeem Christian Church of God. Mike Adenuga globacom chairman his daughter married to a Muslim guy and heaven did not fall what I know is that the way poor people think is very annoying. But my advice is please they should have their parents blessing otherwise they might leave to regret it. God will help them.

Thanks so much for the advice bro...