₦airaland Forum

Shiitposter:
Timi, so after we free you today you come dey cast us online?
Don't worry, i wrote down your plate number. You will definitely hear from us.

Cheers,
SARS.

Sir no vex.... na my brother go post am...

God save us from Ourselves

They finally proved the popular saying POLICE IS YOUR FRIEND when you give them money

Dear Nigerian police, 500k to bail my self? (what a funny encounter today!)
Based on the 777, Edo police took it upon themselves to make some cool cash, knowing fully well people would send location messages to friends about the event...

Before i go on: "I would be happy, if federal government could tutor old and incoming police about what INTERNET / Online business is" it will save the stupidity many are putting on themselves.

To save your stress in this life: Let your sent messages, received, draft be always at zero, anything is an offense to SARs i swear.
i showed them ID no way, i showed them my Cooperate Acc Cheque, they claim almost every G boys now have cooperate Acc / Dorm account, i should show them real facts.

They made me pull of my shirt (chai) searched my body for any marks, checked my thumbs if it has been manipulated, several useless cheques
i told them Google adsense is one of the source, they said anything relating to online is CYBER CRIME, i try to explain that its when its being used fraudulently they say NO, as far as i goto Google and search who to defraud, immediately i fainted in spirit..

They saw Bank transactions and flared up, i begged them to give me access to my phone they ignore, they read my SMS one by one till ending..
When i knew they were blatant illiterates is when: The started checking my Facebook Timeline/wall from their phone with the name found on my ID and said why would i have so much comments on my posts, that i am fraudulent.. i totally stopped talking cos i couldn't convince them anymore, it seems all they want is money.

They saw a comment from one Icekid Dah saying "OMG", they said it means "O mi Gongo", that am a "Marphites", they saw another comment of "mmm", they said its MMM that am using MMM to defraud people.

i was boiling inside mehn, that kind thing, totally restricted to make calls or prove a point..
One said if i am making money online i should give them Adsense number so they can call and confirm (i just weak!)
They said if i cant provide details of people i claim pays me, then am literally doing it illegal, How the they get my account details to always pay me, No way to further explain cos i was not with a browsing phone and it seems they do not even know what E-Mail means...

After few hours with them, i had to reason along the money side, but before then..
Who say police/SARs are not making money? it is one of the lucrative jobs right now, i saw over 100 brown envelopes pilled in with money in accordance to several office with names on each, right before my eyes people where paying 100k, 50k etc just to free themselves (would i challenged them? i was just looking, trying to prove my point because 500k is so ridiculous)

When i discovered i was the only one left and the other idiot was writing a Detention Order (he wrote DENETION instead Lol)
Should i price 500k? i dey mad, even if am worth more i rather sleep in cell than lavish money, i decided to start begging, they where now happy, then said this is what i should have been doing instead of quoting laws (if i hear u say Nigeria have any laws eehn, we have broken our ten commandments)...
"With Pain", i brought out 5k and said Sir please manage it its for you all, the bargain started, they claimed commissioner knows about my case, becos the scene i created was too large that if not 400k am sleeping cell, after much much, as an Igbo boy, i still gave them the 5k, we all became friends gave them few recharge cards, and they are inviting me over..

These are the Tips they gave me, as am now their younger brother:

1. When we say enter the car, do not argue, just enter or you will receive few free beatings that no one can question us for.
2. If you are legal or not, still follow us to station, start with begging tho you will still be searched, then immediately say what you have to pay, and you will be freed.

Now: are these the police that claims to be our friends? so no young man is free? even if not, atleast given a benefit of explanation..
They keep shouting "Oboy say the truth, U dey press, abi you no know say na we first start cultism and yahoo for this benin" - Why do not arrest yourselves instead?

Today, i became tired of Nigeria, i wept for my dear Nation, all those patrol agents all they do is catch get undocumented bail to enrich their pockets..
We are now friends tho, but if i have spiritual powers, i would just wipe out all the officers in that office tonight (God answer this prayer) LOL...


Fidelis Ozuawala

Please what's the flight fare from Lagos to Serbia
Mid July (10th-20th)

Wizkid still behaves like a KID..
This dude has forgotten he has a KID

They don start again Lalasticlala food don come

TheKingIsHere:
must you lie?

about?

waledeji:
Guy where have you been na, where are all those your funny videos you used to post here

lol I have been having difficult times.. Haven't had time to come here...

---

Benekruku:
Wizzy Wizzy!

After him, there is none!

Have you ever thought maybe because he is the last on the list

The pastor gave up after after a while
Why he do like that....

waledeji you asked for it

I don't know why I find this hilarious

Just watch below.


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Uni0ifrNPmA

Do not drop your mail... Send me a message through my mail

sniperr007:
Pls give me link to download the game.

please send me a mail

sheunsheun:
I need the game as well. i have sent you a mail

I have replied

freesinzu:
my boss abeg, i sent u an email i dont think it gone though, just help me with the link or anything i need this game

I have replied you already

johnjunior39:
Timi I sent u mail but I can't confirm if it went through. I need it abeg johnjunior39@gmail.com

I have replied you..

becksdinho:
Good evening bro.. Pls I sent a mail last month but you haven't replied me.

oh my bad... Please send a new one... (My Nairaland) username@gmail.com

I have replied all

Someone should watch it and do the review

And Me and this Man are both Nigerians

www.nairaland.com/attachments/5319866_20170515170736_jpeg04a62ea6119f6cd530a31b75f63bddd0

CrazyScientist:
Timi! Timi! Timi! Clap for me, just started season 2023/2024.
Its been a heck of a journey!

Got Juve Stabia to Serie A and Won it. ( brought them from Seria C) , Won the europa league and they sacked me due to transfer budget misunderstanding. I am a Legend at their club though.

Got the Nigeria job, Won the CHAN twice, AFCON once and the World Cup once.
Nigeria has got a lot of good talent in the game. Stole a ghanaian guy and gave him his Nigeria debut before ghana could

Funny no big club wanted me despite my brilliant history. Cause of the sack and my National B License

Took over Aviron Bayonnais in the french division 3 and Won the french Cup, got them to division 2 Won the europa league and french cup again! .
Now in the Ligue 1, and entering the champions league at group stage after winning the europa league.

Will complete my Continental A License when the Season starts. Aviron Bayonnais have been good to me.
Selling 7 players from my squad though, got better guys in now.

wow... Nice work done... You are a real gamer

NicestDude:
guys, i want to get my passport, is there any office near Aboru or Iyana-ipaja area. I'm a bit new in Lagos. like how much would it cost? the documents required? do they really need the local government proof of identification and birth certificate? because I will have to travel back to anambra to get them. are they really required?

not necessarily, go with enough cash

MilanKore:
Good morning! @timidapsin Please! I need the FM 17 game. My mail "akoredesangotola@gmail.com"

I have mailed you but next time don't drop your mail here

Uricas:
You say 15k again? Is that offering or bribe?

Fuel

donmelinga:
Good day Timi. I need the game but i dont have ur email. mine is anagbosochisom@gmail.com

please you guys should stop posting emails here... It's against the rules...
My email is my Nairaland username @gmail.com

wiliz:
Boss.. pls send to me, princewagbara@yahoo.com tnks

mail me

JETB94:
Good morning Timi. I sent you a mail

I replied already

Mhayurbaba:
Pls i need fm17 pc..timidaspin,i mailed u

I replied you already na