₦airaland Forum

eluquenson:
Stop this hypocrisy, i can't patronize Innoson, i need to be sincere with myself regardless of your statement, i used Toyota Camry pencil light and am very sure you can't compare it with this your Innossonn motors.

Let Innoson flood Lagos state and i will wait for 1 more year to patronize them, you don't need to be fast in judging my decision.

Oga you no get money to even buy a direct tokunbo..abeg go find naija used

Make I see people wey fut buy tear rubber

Shift jhoor

chiefobdk:
person wey no get money for tokunbo. U dey advice am for new. U no hear Whr him say Nigerian used

My broad forgive my oversight ..na true

BRAND NEW CAR IS BETTER THAN USED CAR


Why do we have tokunbo used mentality in Nigeria?


Go Innosson

Buy Nigeria

eluquenson:
I just appreciate this man for patronizing our made in Nigeria Vehicle, if others will emulate this gesture.

Pls, i need a Toyota Corolla Sport/Matrix registered, very urgent. don't refer me to Innoson oh

NICE ONE...MY ANAMBRA BROTHER

tintingz:
I disagree.

Where do you put religion, two Yoruba couples having clash because of their religion background/differences.

It is personalities, individual character and we should stop generalizing a tribe as a whole because of your experience you had with someone

It’s a big task, but it need not be burdensome. Women must understand that an agreement to marry a man from a different tribe amounts to an agreement to give up (or at least render secondary) her cultural roots and all its offshoots – language, food, dressing, etc. Also, she must take all necessary steps to imbibe the man’s culture and tradition, speak his language and cook his tribe’s food. But if this is all that is required of a woman in such a marriage arrangement, it would not be a big deal.

In other words, the need to acclimatize in terms of culture, tradition, language, food, etc is not the main challenge a woman married to a man from another tribe would have. There are many other issues which, if not handled properly, can lead to a failed marriage.

The truth is that the problems women face in inter-tribal marriages are hardly caused by their husbands; the problems come from third parties like the husbands’ family members and friends; the women’s friends and, sometimes, neighbors.

For instance, if a man’s mother had a ‘better homegrown candidate’ for her son to marry and he marries this ‘outsider’ instead, no matter what the chosen wife does to ‘blend’ into the family’s culture and traditions, she may have a hard time pleasing her mothering- law.


In such an instance, the man’s mum may attribute the wife’s flaws to her tribe. Woes betide a woman who cannot understand or speak her husband’s language!!! She must be ready to ignore a lot of conversations in that language if she must remain sane.

Trust me; suspicion can drive any human being crazy! So, it is either you learn the language fast or you just deafen your ears to such ‘suspicious’ conversations. I must admit that not all inter-tribal marriages face such problems/challenges.


Infact,the children from such home will not know the language to speak neither will they know which culture to be imbibed with dat is why people can no longer hear nor speak our native languages and it's gradually going into extinction .pls let's join in saving our culture oooooooooo

.

Most people who also support inter-tribal marriages will say that it helps to enlarge ones frontiers and entire concept and opinion about life, because they believe that you get to appreciate other people more.

Yes, everything I have mentioned above is true and I’m not one to disprove all that without letting you know why. I must tell you its challenges can be daunting. And that trust and bonding may be difficult to achieve and the ease of separation is high.

It is expensive as it entails patronizing two cultures whenever there are challenges – death in any of the families and its attendant burial, marriages in the families, other cultural ceremonies and parties.

Children born into such homes may end up not having clear cultural identities about where they belong. This is one of the major reasons why a lot of our cultures are dying out today, especially as English language will become the language of both choice and necessity in the home.

There is also the problem of the parties trying to adjust and accommodate each others’ differences especially when we think of the fact that they both had different backgrounds in terms of orientation while growing up in different cultural settings.

In some cases, issues such as which language should the children also learn and master while growing up aside English becomes a serious bone of contention that if not quickly checked and resolved, can tear the fabrics of the relationship apart, the husband will want the children to be identified on his side and the fact that he is not always at home and the woman is close to the kids makes it difficult for this to happen.

The marriage will at this point become an issue of whose culture is better, thereby creating more problems for the relationship. The ‘in-law problem’ is magnified in inter cultural marriages.

It is not as if there are no ‘in-law’ problems in intra cultural marriages, it is just that intra cultural marriages brings in people of the same cultural perspective who understands the politics at play in marriages.

A woman who is coming from a culture where woman are culturally emancipated will be at a lose when in a marriage in which the man comes from a culture where woman are only to be seen and not heard or where the woman is not even reckoned with at any social settings. Another point to be seriously looked out is that of different cultural practices like female genital mutilation.

This is a practice erroneously referred to as female circumcision. This is a practice that whether we like it or not, is still common in different parts of the country.

For someone that is an advocate of its’ abolishment, getting married to a woman or vice-versa who come from a culture that still supports it may seriously cause a major wedge in the marriage.

The Old Testament contained some restrictions on whom the Israelites could marry. These were meant to protect the people of God from pagan influences (Deut. 7:3-4) and to guard the purity of the Aaronic priesthood (Lev. 21:13-14). There were even some strict regulations about inter-tribal marriage, designed to keep the various tribes' inheritance from being lost by intermarriage (Num. 36:3-9).

Those ones are not churches but religious congregational business ventures..so the

Rexology:
I agree with you on Catholic Church you mentioned... Do you see them acquire private jet? I am particularly referring to those churches that acquire private jets... You know them in this Country.

tintingz:
I disagree.

Where do you put religion, two Yoruba couples having clash because of their religion background/differences.

It is personalities, individual character and we should stop generalizing a tribe as a whole because of your experience you had with someone

Inter tribal is lesser devil ...different religion is the greater devil


So I said stick to your kind


Both religiously and culturally

Rexology:
I am still waiting to see churches providing infrastructures and facilities for public use as a way of assisting the Government in developmental projects, rather than buying private jets for their personal use. #NigeriaMustWork

Catholic and Anglican churches has been doing that all these while in anambra

Anambra are pretty dominantly Catholics or Anglicans

Aku ruo uno....okwuo ebe osi....ndi be anyi...ka anyi bute aku anyi be anyi

Black man and pull him down syndrome

It's obvious here .....now I do not blame biafrans

Ecoterrorism:
It means Buhari appoints any northerner he sees in the news into his government.

Who are the goats that voted this olodo into power

The goats are in stable and their pen eating grass

You know goats are ruminants ..they have four chambered stomach so they can regurgitate....that's what they are doing now


Regurgitation is the ability to bring out what you eat from.the stomach and re chew it again

So basically the goats are chewing the change over and over again

They are dazed

Now I am a wailer

Ymodulus:
Some months ago i wrote an article on why the Deltans are not igbos and should be left out of the Biafram struggle.

Today while watching a Nigerian Movie title " The Meeting Silverbird Cinema "

I watched this, and I noticed the igbo lady trying so hard to make sure that Rita Dominic a Delta woman accept that she is Igbo and not Delta.

Why are igbos this forceful. Deltans say leave them alone and you are still trying to force yourselves.

Rita Dominic is from imo state ...mbaise

So stop been stupid here

Ugomba

tintingz:
I said two 'set' of people which include the families, if both families tolerate each other there won't be problem.

Most marriage clashes because of intolerance, indiscipline, are they blind before they realize they are from different tribe?

In inter marriage its either the wife grew up in the man's society and understand the language of the husband and vice versa, people don't just marry from another tribe.

Stella Damascus first marriage was a tragic memory for her, she lost her husband, I don't know about her second marriage.

Funke Akindele married from her tribe yet she didn't last a month in that marriage, same as princess the comedienne, Toyin Aimaku

There are people in inter-tribal marriage, people like Peter okoye and Lola omotayo, Stephanie Okereke and Linus Idahosa, Annie Macaluey and Tubaba Idibia, Femi Brainard and Uche Nwokeocha etc. These people marriage still waxing strong.

You have given us stats of the happily ever living after...why don't you give us tons of the intimate strangers



90% of inter tribal stuffs don't work . ..what you just reeled is 10%

I have driven cars and I have come to conclusion that most Japanese and Asian cars are basically weird ...though I own one Nissan but I am in love with my Benz

Why do I detest these cars ....they are front wheel cars and do you know why I detest front wheels cars .....


The biggest benefit to rear wheel drive is that it spreads the loads of the car across all four tyres of a car. In a rear wheel drive car the rear wheels do the pushing while the front wheels are reserved for the steering duties. In front wheel drive cars the front tyres must perform both functions. Each front tyre in a front wheel drive car must do two tasks. Both the cornering forces and the engine acceleration/deceleration forces in a front wheel drive car act on the same tyres.
So in a front drive the tyre's capacity can be easily exceeded. In a rear drive car the rear tyres handle the engine acceleration/deceleration while the front only need to handle the steering forces. Not only does this balance the load on the tyres but it reserves the front tyres exclusively for the all important steering work.

Better weight balance: Most rear wheel drive cars have the engine in the front and the drive components in the rear. Front drive cars have everything up front. By properly balancing the front and rear of the car you can improve the handling, acceleration, braking, and thus safety of a car.

Better acceleration: Rear wheel drive cars accelerate faster than a front drive car from a stop. This is because when you accelerate quickly from a stop the weight of the car transfers to the rear of the car. In a rear drive car this places extra weight on the rear of the car, essentially jamming the tyres into the road greatly increasing traction. In a front drive car, when the weight goes to the rear, weight is taken off of the front wheels. This allows the front wheels lose traction and spin easier. If the wheels are spinning not only does this slow you down but it also makes it difficult to steer the car. In the rear drive car the front tyres are available for steering even if the rears have lost traction.

Better Road Holding: The better weight balance of rear wheel drive allows the car to handle better. The more even weight allows the car to drive neutrally through a corner. This means both the front and rear of the car have near equal loads acting upon them.

Better Stopping: Due to the better balance rear drive cars brake better.

No Torque Steer: Front wheel Drive cars have a problem known as Torque Steer. This occurs when the acceleration of the engine effects the cars steering. Since the driveline is connected to the steering wheels the torque of the engine applies force to the front wheels causing the car to pull to the right during acceleration.
Rear Drive cars do not have this problem since the engine is not connected to the steering gear.

Better Ride and Feel: The light front end of the car allows it to "turn in" to a corner easier. The car feels more nimble and controllable. Since the front is not so heavy it is not burdened by needing strong springs to keep it under control. This allows the suspension to be set up softer while maintaining good control ability.

Better Serviceability: Rear wheel drive cars are more rugged, cheaper and easier to fix.

Onegai:
I have to differ. I know someone married inter-tribally to a Yoruba man and she says "oh don't marry Yoruba people, they are so tribal, they don't like me because their son married a non-Yoruba". You know the crazy thing? Her SiL (husband's sister) is married to a Benue man and the family accepts and likes him. She refuses to admit to herself that they have a problem with HER, not her tribe.

When people have issues, it is so much easier to blame inconsequential things like race and tribe rather than get down to the real issues: differences in mindset, upbringing, morals, principles and personality quirks. So instead of saying "my cousin married from Niger and the marriage didn't work out because he and his wife kept fighting and didn't know how to communicate peaceably", they will say "Dont marry Niger girls, they're bad".

Example of this is a lady i met, Igbo, who declared "we can never marry Asaba girls, they don't make good wives" based on what she had seen one relative go through. Yet, she will tell you Asaba people are Igbo (like so many Igbo people on NL will) and her hands were not clean (she was being frisky with a coworker's husband, also Igbo ). She would even say "if an Igbo girl is seen with a married man, everyone would be shocked because Igbo girls are well-brought up and know better". Ignoring all the aristo babes I know (go to Abuja and ask the tribe of yellow girls hanging around NA and come back and testify ). Talk about blindness.

So can I now tell my brothers "don't marry Igbo girls, they're shameless and the marriage won't work"?

(btw, where I come from, they bring up children with the phrase "if you marry an Igbo man, we will not attend that wedding".

In a nutshell


Stick to your type and kind

Eddygourdo:
You all getting emotional aren't seeing the big picture, there are generalisations and of course exceptions, most with successful inter-tribal marriages are exceptions and very blessed, tonychristopher isn't very far from the truth with respect to the majority of cases. It's everybody's opinions and experiences. The challenges poses is why we sought successful experiences from the successful ones

Thanks

ariesbull:
Well you are correct but group attitude influences individual attitude ..this is a well and established fact

Lol..this guy is funny

ariesbull:
From what I can read here ...I think tonychristopher is a realist while Bellaella is an idealist

It's not been idealist or realist ...a spade should be a spade and that's what's it should be called

I do not see hypocrisy in Bruce but I see stupidity in the OP


people should learn how to accept the message and discard the messenger


What is wrong with people


Well the OP has shown that common sense ain't common after all

Probably, I am not so moral person to close my eyes on such conceptions as ethnicity. What do you mean by judging? Of course, society cannot forbid to someone marry (I think), but I suppose, that we are able to have opinions. If it is that you call "judge" - yes, we have rights. Love is great, but there are things which I consider more important than feelings.


If going away of your types and kind favours you...if you want to be the one that will go out if the norm suits you .so be it


I have my conviction

DeMekus:
And there's more advantage marrying from your own tribe, or a tribe with similar culture as yours (like you pointed out earlier). Because you get to relate well with understanding. I can't imagine the degree of hate an Igbo girl married in an Igbo-hating Yoruba community would have to endure. They'd always refer to her as "awon oloshi omo Igbo, omo aje okuta ma mu omi" ... SMH!

That's the fact ...my aunty married an educated Yoruba family ..but if I tell you what she saw..hmmmmm she literally saw hell ..what about my cousin ..what about my coursemate


My dear the stories are all the same ..I have even started druming it in my little girls ears as early as 9 ..I just don't bloody care ...she has to bring my tribes man home . that's is me and I don't owe any body apology


Well by the grace of God she will t be the black sheep of the family

tintingz:
Where is the proof @ bolded?

Religion is even more worst than inter-tribal marriage.

A Muslim man can marry a Muslim woman and tribe won't be a problem if they are not from same tribe.

Wether type or specie there will always be clashes in marriage most time it is intolerance.

When two set of people tolerate each other there won't be problem in marriages.


When it comes to tribalism, stereotypes I see it as stupidity.

[img]http://1.bp..com/-6wzhEV44G0A/U1_xG74HNHI/AAAAAAAATdM/cUkO0iviLok/s1600/anderson+silva+racism+quotes.jpg[/img]

Maybe your are in Mars or Jupiter but it African ....marriage isn't about two people tolerating each other ...it about family

It is a unio. Between families


Just like a girl that disobeys the parents and went ahead to marry a boy thinking that love is the major ingredient in marriage ..when the marital crisis cones..who will she run to



I am not saying that inter tribal marriages don't work ...they do but there is very higher tendencies for those marriages to break up


Ask Stella damasus or clarion chukwura abiola


These are few case studies

Nikita1:
You are loosing it

I have found it dearie

How was your val...hope your husband took u out

DeMekus:
Inter-tribal marriage is nonsense, as senseless as this Igbo/Yoruba marriage that is in trend now. I agree with Tonychistopher 100%. What's the need marrying from a tribe where your own tribe is hated? Rubbish!

My dear even when isreal was in cannan lord even told them to marry from their Jewish tribe ....


The tendency for inter tribal marriage to breakdown is high ....lets face the fact

90% of people around the world marry from their own

BellaElla:
Oga I hope you married from your clan, or better still from the compound next to yours in your village. it would be a shame if you didn't...really. see you championing for a cause that you have no business with. you do not know how long I dated my husband before marriage. you do not know our level of compatibility or lack of it thereof, but you have naively jumped into the conclusion that I was complacent or infatuated. the level of love and welcome I have received from my husband family, I cant even describe, my mother in law calls me to pray for on the phone almost everyday, so again I ask, why do you seat in your little closed world on and conclude on behalf of the millions of inter tribal families. who made you our spokesman? you have travelled the world does not mean you have learnt an iota of what life is all about. your first child is nine does not make you an expert on inter tribal marriages. why don't you focus on your clannish family and allow us the have broader minds to enjoy our uniqueness. I hope you are as passionate in your marriage as you are in your quest to prove that those of us married outside our tribes have less of a marriage than those married within their tribes. its people like you that would stand in the way of your children's happiness because of your tribalistic, bigoted mind set. oga wake up and smell the coffee biko. thank God I don't have someone as close minded as you in my family. I hope you don't do business with other tribes, or let your children go to the same school with them. abi they are only good for association but not for marriage. So people that think like you still exist. Chukwu zuputa kw'anyi n'aka ndi mgbochi uzo. Ekene kwa m gi!

So long a letter ....what I have said I have said ..
What I have written I have written


Our people said

Ochoro mgbafu siri na aluru ya Anya



Be passionate ..be loving ,be prayerful


But the truth is sacrosanct

Myde4naija:
thanks for clearing it, oBA in Yoruba means KING

Same as edo

tintingz:
It is only an "illitrate" and few educated dimwit people that sees many thing wrong in inter-tribal and inter-racial marriage(according psychology facts).

From generalizing to stereotypes.

All these cultural ish as been programmed to our brain and thinking that when someone marries from another tribe he or she has lost it.

As if marrying from same tribe guarantee happy marriage.

People lost their culture and language not because of inter-tribal marriage but because of not teaching our next generation the culture and language.

Oga abi madam

Take this or you leave it

The ratio of inter tribal marriage breakup is high ...it might sound harsh but it the fact
Just like that if inter racial


Take this or leave it


It has always been the most reasonable thing to stick with your type ..not that there won't be erring ones ....there will


Pls for not seeing from your perspective doesn't make someone dimwit ..what is wrong with you guys



Must we see from your view point