₦airaland Forum

baralatie: finally u kearning how to swing the ropes.u just dont know the rules of romantic engagement

Is there anymore I should know?

(P.S. I still feel sorry, for women who feel the need to play games, have some self respect, you will never know love otherwise)

Subom1: Am glad you are finally done with your tales by moonlight

I spy another woman who does not trust men

It is all good though. I am learning why it is important to express your feelings to a girl quickly. I have never done this. I have always hidden them. But I have made the leap and I am moving on. She is still stuck. By playing games she was dragging me down to her level again. Now I am aware, I can move past this.

I now see why men cannot really have female friends that they are attracted to. It must be one or the other!!!

baralatie: Op!i knw 1/2 tins abt feeling used bt i dnt dwel on those tots.
The mst important tin is dat 1 should be able to see & tink clearly in any relatnshp.
4 women,a man will 4ever be a braging rit u cant stop them(it is women-women tin,men are neua admited)
4wateva a woman does neva 'abuse' a woman only knw hw to swimg the ropes
we men,wether we lik dem or not.we cant live witout dem.

Wow! Is this how you view women. I cant believe it. I am sorry, but in my opinion, you are pretty sad and pathetic.

People like you make me feel a little sick. You seem to think that women are only there to be manipulated for sex. That any interaction with women will always be a game to get something (i.e. sex).

I really feel sorry for you. Clearly you do not understand love at all...it is just something you say to bed women.

I have no NEED for women. I can live without them. I have some respect for myself and them, clearly something you do not have.

This is why I was so hurt that she clearly is only interested in my affections because it makes her feel good. She is not serious. She finds it impossible to open up and be honest, just play games.

I have thought about this a lot, clearly she is like this for a very good reason. She has been hurt by MUGU scum before. She has been bedded and then dropped like nothing. Is this how Nigerian men treat women? It is disgusting. I no longer hate her for what she has done/tried to do with me. I forgive her and I just pity her. It is how she is and I feel sorry for her. I now see and understand that there are clearly many MUGUs in Nigeria that have only seen her as a sex object and nothing more. She has given her heart to these people before and they have abused it, so she does not want to make that mistake again. She will play everyone. Like you, she needs other people to make her feel good about herself. She does not respect herself. How can she respect other people, when she does not respect herself. Once again, I have sympathy and I pity her, but I am not like that.

Someone said I "professed my love for her" as if I was just pulling strings. Perhaps you find it impossible that a guy would actually fully love and respect someone for who they are. Perhaps many Nigerian men are incapable of that...they just see women as sex objects. I actually cared about this woman and loved her deeply, but like you, she seems incapable of true love. To think she actually tried to talk to ME about TRUE LOVE...she does not, and probably will never know the true meaning.

When she calls I will explain to her that I care and love her deeply. But because of her behavior, nothing can and will ever happen. But unlike you SCUM, I will stay there for her. I know some Nigerian men are incapable of understanding that a guy could actually care about a woman's feelings, but I do very much with this woman. I will stay as a friend to her. I will build her up and try and repair some of the damage that has been done to her. I am going to try and help her respect and feel good about herself, and realize that she does not need men, sex, attention or other people to feel important. She can do that herself. I am then going to tell her all the tricks that men use to bed her. This way, I hope she will stand a chance of being happy and finding true love (which is what I want). Unfortunately, IT WILL NEVER BE WITH ME. I DO NOT WANT SOMEONE LIKE THAT, and I will remind myself before and after every call. It is sad, but Oremi from now on.

In time, she may even realize that because of what she thinks about love and dating and attraction, she has missed out on true love. But I can never be with someone like that, so unfortunately, it is over. It is called "One chance".

I am glad that I revealed my feelings and asked her for honesty, it gave me the opportunity to see that she was unable to do that. Poor woman. I want someone more genuine. Genuine people do not play on peoples emotions for some underhanded reason.

Done, move on

On reflection. She has taken everything without actually giving anything AT ALL!

How did I not realize this earlier?

Don't care what people say...going to hurt her for this emotionally.

99cent: She wasn't even chasing u. You were d one who was obsessing over her and declaring ur great love for her. Now because she rejected u/ she's not interested, u have concluded she is a "prostitute" "oyinbo hunter" "repulsive" etc anything to make urself feel better sha
better luck next time. eyahh

Don't worry. Planning revenge though. I know what shes after now. Plane, visa and money. Going to plan myself a little sting. See how she likes getting bleeped around.

eyahhh

99cent: She wasn't even chasing u. You were d one who was obsessing over her and declaring ur great love for her. Now because she rejected u/ she's not interested, u have concluded she is a "prostitute" "oyinbo hunter" "repulsive" etc anything to make urself feel better sha
better luck next time. eyahh

Not like that at all. I had stopped calling her. I had tried to put her out of my mind. And it was working. I was actually focusing on myself. Then she kept calling. Before I answered I told myself that she just saw me as a friend. I did not want to get involved in all that again. She started suggesting that I should marry someone (again) and "would I Marry Yourba?", "when will I return to Nigeria?", "I should ask now"

She has been playing this shit for months. I think she was well aware of how I felt all along. She always referred to things in the third person. She likes manipulating people. She likes getting them to expose their feelings without committing at all.

As soon as I slipped into that thinking again and finally declared my feelings and opened up, her response was to basically "think of her all the time" because that is "tru-love". I said I wanted openness and honesty, and she cut me off.

WHAT THE Bleep!!!! Does she enjoy hurting people or something. No wonder she is single at 30

baralatie: Op!i knw 1/2 tins abt feeling used bt i dnt dwel on those tots.
The mst important tin is dat 1 should be able to see & tink clearly in any relatnshp.
4 women,a man will 4ever be a braging rit u cant stop them(it is women-women tin,men are neua admited)
4wateva a woman does neva 'abuse' a woman only knw hw to swimg the ropes
we men,wether we lik dem or not.we cant live witout dem.

I will get over it and move on. Will take a few days.

Still praying that she tries to call me though. Another pathetic attempt to try and play me.

You see. She is exactly what I thought. 'Oyinbo Hunter'. I am a one woman kind of guy really. I never wanted to play about. I just want a wife and family. She is 30. It is what she is looking for. Not only that but I loved her for who she is.

I want her to call me so I call tell her exactly what she missed out on. "Tru love" as she calls it. She does not (and probably never will know the meaning of the word). She has gone from wife material to prostitute in seconds. I always wondered what her day job was. She was always very vague..."photocopying". Always had a lot of money too, cash. Phone number on facebook.

Eugh! Feel used though. On reflection she was exactly what I feared about her. Manipulator, only interested in my attention, I am even beginning to wonder if she was using it/my texts as a bragging opportunity to her friends. She wanted to keep things going, to eventually get me to declare my feelings "look I have an oyinbo". Jesus...how could I have got her so wrong.

What a repulsive individual.

Completely destroyed that friendship. Going to wait for her to call again. If she ever does. Then just lay the smack down. She didn't deserve any of that love.

All over! Without us even really saying much to each other!!!!

Let me put it like this. I ain't great with women. I don't have much experience. The one meaningful relationship I did have was emotionally abusive. To be honest, I think both of us were at the time, but obviously I remember more of her manipulation.

I began to express how I felt to the Naija babe in a telephone call. She sent a long complicated text implying that love was about always thinking of the other person ALL THE TIME. I cut to the chase and was direct, I said "I do think about you all the time, I love you, but we are very different people, we need to be open and honest with each other about how we feel". Tried to call her later in the evening. Cancelled the call twice. A Nigerian friend told me that she was acting, that I should keep sending her nice texts. The more I did this the more I kept thinking about her. Something didn't feel right. Then today, it suddenly clicked. I am being completely played by her. Why does she want me thinking about her all the time? Why did she refuse to answer after I had brought up honesty and openness? She had never really told me how she feels. Just given signals. Even after I made moves. My head was spinning because of her. All this time, she has been after something. I just know it. There was something not quite right about her. She was very straight faced. I do not remember much emotion.

In conclusion. She is attempting to manipulate me for some reason and I do not think it is love. I know what this feels like.

I have told her my feelings and I am happy with that. She seems to be waiting for me to lay out plan of how we can be together...without disclosing anything. Well that is not what I am after.

I have just text her saying that I am beginning to wonder if this is a good idea. I want someone who is open and honest. (To my mind, she seems a little incapable of that.) I clearly said that I have been manipulated and hurt before and I don't want that. So for now, goodbye.

And that is it. Case closed

eeewise: Op u re bothered abt her gettin to know abt ur real financial state?she comin over and seein that the grass isn't greener on the other side lolzzzz....her seeing ur poverty .eyah PLS LET HER KNW D REAL PICTURE OF TINS over der and watch her reaction

That is a big factor. Also I do not want to get in relationship to "save" someone. Relationships are supposed to be about mutual respect and seeing both the positive and negative qualities in each other. I am wondering if "saving" her from poverty is the only positive she sees in me. That is a lot of pressure and once she sees that the grass is NOT greener on the other side/or that it IS greener on the other side. Where does that leave me?

It leaves me as someone who has been used and is surplus to requirements, because of another's persons own self interest. That is not love and mutual respect. That is not the relationship I want.

baralatie: Nw dnt reverse to chicken mode 2mrw o!
"i want u nw,nw"
It is 4rm her response u make a decision.

Not chicken mode. Just caring for the person and knowing that by expressing my feelings, her mind may run away with fantasies for the future. Only to be let down on hurt. To you it is so simple. What if she reciprocates? Jump on a plane to Nigeria?!!!! Fly her over to be with me?!!! Smh...it is that simple to you isn't it.

You make it sound like you run around chasing women desperately. You give to much power away. She is special. But so am I. I have other things going for me, besides women. Therefore, she has to work for a relationship too.
"I WANT YOU NOW"...lol. Smh. Is it all about selfish lust with you?

I am more interested in telling her that I care about her and that I want her to be happy. It is up to her if she takes that deal.

P.S. Did call her and begin, but she was in a sleepy state (I woke her). I said I would let her sleep...but she was eager for me to call tomorrow.

I think I should probably stop posting this stuff now. I can take it from here thanks.

Cheers to everyone for their comments.

baralatie: U must be a teenager!
Thats why?

Haha! Two posts two hours apart. Clearly the mugu is annoyed.

If you had even read my posts, you would know that the situation is not so simple.

How about her wasting my time. She has pursued me just as much, it is a two way thing. If I have to work for her affections and for her to disclose her feelings, she will have to do the same.

I am not one of these guys that chase around girls blindly. Desperately professing my feelings to them all without considering the implications. I actually care about their feelings, about getting their hopes up, about getting involved.

Perhaps you have no respect for women, or other human beings and their feelings. Once again, I think I pity you.

If I do lose her to someone that is more direct, there are other fish in the sea.

baralatie: @OP!
WATEVER IT IS THAT U DRANK OR SMOKED AS 2 STOP RIT NW.
JST LOOK AT URSELF,A FUL GROWN MAN DROOPING.IF I WAS BY U,I 'L GIV A GUD SLAP!
NO,A GUD PUNCH ON UR FACE MHT DO U GUD!

Cut the tape and mov on!

Nobody wil get hurt!

I wish I was as cool and strong as you! : P (I am being sarcastic). Clearly you do not have very deep emotions. I pity you.

Perhaps you are upset because I called you a MUGU.

I have spoken to a Nigerian friend who knew us both at the time. He observed. His opinion that she "loved" me. His words.

I am going to tell her how I feel about her and how I have always felt about her tonight. I do not particularly want a reply. That is not important. If she reciprocates, I will need to know why EXACTLY she likes me. What she sees in me. I could tell her what I like about her at the drop of a hat. I will then need to think for a while to see if I am convinced. I need to know how "honest" her agenda is. How genuine her feelings are for me.

Some of the things she has said in the past left me wondering..."what is she really after?". This may be my own suspicious nature, that I have been hurt before, that she could not know how I would interpret those things, that she made an honest slip up.

I will need to decide if she is just telling me what she wants me to hear out of her own interest, or if she has genuine feelings.

She is either very genuine and a little stupid for mentioning these things, or very clever in manipulating and disguising her true intentions and has accidentally spilled what she wants.

Similarly, I am either very stupid for keeping my distance when she is genuine, or very clever and wise to avoid getting involved with someone who is only out for themselves.

We will see.

This is going to hurt so much I pray she does not get upset. I sense she has been waiting for me to make a move I want her but it is just impossible. I was so stupid to let it get this far. If she does like me. This may ruin the friendship, with her and the family

I really hope I have got it wrong.

I cannot do this anymore You guys seem to have no idea. I miss Naija a lot and the family. I was in a really bad way after returning. You are all going to dismiss this as 'weak' blah blah etc. But there was one thing I missed about it all and that was HER I cannot describe how low I felt for the months after returning in Spring. I just wanted to be around her. I regretted not expressing my feelings to her when I was there. In hindsight, she gave me opportunities. But it is not just about my feelings for her. She confided in me a lot. She is deeply unhappy with her situation in Nigeria. She wants to leave, she has told me this. She even said "who will save me" in conversation...and then waited for my answer.

Do you have any idea how much pressure this puts me under. YES, I care about her a lot. But why does she set out to play on my emotions like this. I felt so guilty that I was leaving this woman, that I couldn't say what she wanted to hear: "I will save you". I knew this would get her hopes up. Why would I want to get her hopes up only for them to be dashed if it was not possible. I CARE ABOUT HER.

You guys seem to think that I am some rich oyinbo who can just click his fingers and get a flight to Nigeria. That I can just magic up the perfect life for her. I am not! Even if I was, do I really want to be with someone who only sees THIS quality. There is more to someone than their skin, their background, the country they are from. It hurts so much that I want to help her. I really like her and I want to be with her...but what does she really see in me besides my skin color and nationality? Where does she expect us to go from there anyway?! She is literally thousands of miles away. We differ in religion, culture, primary language, background. What is she really expecting.

Yes I liked her. I missed her so much when I left. I was devastated. All I wanted was to be with her. But for the first few weeks, she played games with me over and over again. Now she is still expecting me to jump and express how much I want her. Well I am tired of playing games...and I think she is now too.

I cannot describe how painful it is to try and work all this out. I can tell she is becoming upset with my lack of action. I am becoming upset with my lack of action. But if any of you guys have listened to anything that I have written, it is not as easy as saying "I like you" and then everything is "happily ever after".

I have to do something. I told her I will call tomorrow. Express my feelings. Explain everything...how it is unlikely to work and then it will all be over.

So laugh at me. Post mugu comments. Call me weak. I don't care anymore.

Okay. I am really sorry to bring all this up AGAIN (pele o). I now fully expect a torrent of abuse and put downs from the Nairaland community, because it is what I am used to. But please, I pray, if there is any helpful people out there with an insight into the Nigerian woman's mind, please reply with some advice. What does she mean? What is she thinking? Because I do not want anyone to get hurt, particularly this amazing Nigerian woman:

This post follows on from: https://www.nairaland.com/1313544/really-liked-naija-yoruba-girl

So I had decided it was not even worth me explaining my feelings for her. That I care about her deeply. That I do not want to ruin things and risk hurting myself...but especially HER. I kind of gave up any chance in my head and thought we would stay friends.

I haven't contacted her for a couple of weeks. She phoned me during the day, I did not answer. I returned a call later in the evening. She had just returned to her family home. I THINK that there were family members near by. We had a phone call.

ME: "I saw my grandparents at the weekend"
HER: "They are still alive? You must work hard in this new job and have a family to make them proud"
ME: "Yes but I am still looking for a wife"
HER: "You must find one now, there is no time to waste, you must ask someone you know" [Context: She has said this a lot to me, along with 'return to Nigeria']
ME: "Yes I will find a good wife, what about you? You have found a husband?"
HER: "No I am still a little girl (giggles)" [Context: She is actually late 20's and a few years older than me] "You will have a Yoruba wedding in Nigeria abi?"
ME: "Yes I would like that very much! A street wedding! But I do not think I would find a oyinbo woman that would want a Yoruba wedding"
HER: "Ahhhh, so you are going to marry an oyinbo woman?"
ME: "Skin does not matter. Oyinbo or black. As long as they are good in character. What about you? I remember you said that you would marry Yoruba"
HER: "Yes, I must marry Yoruba {begins to whisper and talk very quietly} because they speak the same language, I do not want my husbands parents talking about me in a different language" [Context: She had repeatedly asked to speak to my parents on the telephone and say 'hello', I thought this a little odd from my culture's perspective and she always talks about it and repeats that she doesn't understand why she cannot talk to them]
ME: "Ahhhhh. I see. But you are very good character. Why would they talk about you?"
HER: {Still whispering} "Yes, Yoruba have very good character. They do not like to see harm to others"
ME: "Ahhhh, they are peaceful abi?"
HER: "Yes"
ME: "I remember very nice things about the Yoruba. You are very friendly and open, 'we are one' abi?"
HER: "Yes, 'we are one', you did not call me back earlier in the day. Why was that? You were busy abi?"
ME: "Yes I was out"

Conversation continues a little longer:

HER: "Do not let me waste your recharge"
ME: "Okay"

We end the conversation, but she sounds sadder and more downcast than usual when we ended the conversation.

======================

Am I going crazy or was she trying to tell me something? Was this just a normal conversation. I am sure we both like each other at least a little, although it has never been said. I played it very cool because I thought we were friends. She did a lot more talking than usual.

A little confused? My main concern is that she does not get hurt...but I would like to know peoples views on this conversation.

Thank you people!

Please. Enough with the silly, mugu comments. Yes I am a learner. I have stated the facts, WHAT DO YOU THINK SHE MEANS?

sylvar02: Smdh!!! She was trying to say “UP NEPA”

Mr. Learner

I knew I would get mugu comments. Please translate.

P.S. I am oyinbo (UK), she is Nigerian (in Nigeria) if you didn't know. We do know each other. I stayed with her and her family.

Okay. I am really sorry to bring all this up AGAIN (pele o). I now fully expect a torrent of abuse and put downs from the Nairaland community, because it is what I am used to. But please, I pray, if there is any helpful people out there with an insight into the Nigerian woman's mind, please reply with some advice. What does she mean? What is she thinking? Because I do not want anyone to get hurt, particularly this amazing Nigerian woman:

This post follows on from: https://www.nairaland.com/1313544/really-liked-naija-yoruba-girl

So I had decided it was not even worth me explaining my feelings for her. That I care about her deeply. That I do not want to ruin things and risk hurting myself...but especially HER. I kind of gave up any chance in my head and thought we would stay friends.

I haven't contacted her for a couple of weeks. She phoned me during the day, I did not answer. I returned a call later in the evening. She had just returned to her family home. I THINK that there were family members near by. We had a phone call.

ME: "I saw my grandparents at the weekend"
HER: "They are still alive? You must work hard in this new job and have a family to make them proud"
ME: "Yes but I am still looking for a wife"
HER: "You must find one now, there is no time to waste, you must ask someone you know" [Context: She has said this a lot to me, along with 'return to Nigeria']
ME: "Yes I will find a good wife, what about you? You have found a husband?"
HER: "No I am still a little girl (giggles)" [Context: She is actually late 20's and a few years older than me] "You will have a Yoruba wedding in Nigeria abi?"
ME: "Yes I would like that very much! A street wedding! But I do not think I would find a oyinbo woman that would want a Yoruba wedding"
HER: "Ahhhh, so you are going to marry an oyinbo woman?"
ME: "Skin does not matter. Oyinbo or black. As long as they are good in character. What about you? I remember you said that you would marry Yoruba"
HER: "Yes, I must marry Yoruba {begins to whisper and talk very quietly} because they speak the same language, I do not want my husbands parents talking about me in a different language" [Context: She had repeatedly asked to speak to my parents on the telephone and say 'hello', I thought this a little odd from my culture's perspective and she always talks about it and repeats that she doesn't understand why she cannot talk to them]
ME: "Ahhhhh. I see. But you are very good character. Why would they talk about you?"
HER: {Still whispering} "Yes, Yoruba have very good character. They do not like to see harm to others"
ME: "Ahhhh, they are peaceful abi?"
HER: "Yes"
ME: "I remember very nice things about the Yoruba. You are very friendly and open, 'we are one' abi?"
HER: "Yes, 'we are one', you did not call me back earlier in the day. Why was that? You were busy abi?"
ME: "Yes I was out"

Conversation continues a little longer:

HER: "Do not let me waste your recharge"
ME: "Okay"

We end the conversation, but she sounds sadder and more downcast than usual when we ended the conversation.

======================

Am I going crazy or was she trying to tell me something? Was this just a normal conversation. I am sure we both like each other at least a little, although it has never been said. I played it very cool because I thought we were friends. She did a lot more talking than usual.

A little confused? My main concern is that she does not get hurt...but I would like to know peoples views on this conversation.

Thank you people!

carlos1: The OP is from Mbaise. Ogaghi ahogbuli anyi

Eh? Kor yemi? I do not know that much Yoruba/Naija slang

wahabian: I hate it when y'all mention green card and U.S like that's heaven,its really annoying.Mrs Chima couldn't even think of any other thing to say.I'm not sure you'd do any better than the poor girl ur painting black. What's wrong if someone would like to visit someother part of the world and she says it. If that's gonna come with the love so be it,she's not gonna die if she doesn't get to marry you or go to the U.S .Save me the bullshit !

I know, I know. I am not very trusting. I am coming to realize that there is a VAST difference between how westerners and Nigerians think. She was amazing, I had feelings for her, I am pretty sure that she had feelings for me. But there are so many ways in which we differ. Religion, attitudes to relationships, attitudes to society, attitudes to gender and elders (respect), attitudes to tolerance and other peoples beliefs and attitudes to child discipline. I did very well to FAKE and adapt to the Nigerian way of living, but in hindsight, I was not me and a lot of things she believed in, I did not.

She was fascinating, very attractive and full of joy. She had many strong qualities, but I guess I got so sucked in by that, I was prepared to ignore many of the things I believed. We are very different people and it would have never have worked.

(PS: The reason I have mentioned the 'green card' so much is because of my own insecurities. Before I traveled to Nigeria, I was aware of 'Oyinbo Hunters'. I kept telling myself that "I would not get involved with anyone because there is a risk they could just be hoping for a marriage/green card". Every time she mentioned travelling and wanting to leave Nigeria...it added to my suspicions of her intentions.)

Either way...I am glad I did not mention it. She is a really cool and an amazing Naija babe. If I had mentioned my feelings, it could have made things uncomfortable and ruined our friendship. So I am glad things have turned out like this. It would never have worked.

eeewise: Poverty is indeed UNIVERSAL lolzz,it has no respect for colour,race or country. Smh

True, true. I am sure there are many people in poverty around the world. I just happened to stay in Nigeria with a specific Yoruba family who appeared poorer than the circumstances that I am used to in the west. I was talking about a specific family, I was not generalizing.

I never meant to suggest that all Nigerians were poor. I apologize if I implied that.

Phema: Naaaah, Nigerians are very open-minded people. Antagonism is everywhere on this forum. Infact, you got very little of it. Open the other threads and see the real definition of antagonism.

Like I said, what you did was so thoughtful and kind. Kudos.

Ese e pupo! x

Lmao...people are so argumentative and antagonistic on this forum. It is very funny o

Antagonistic: 'Showing or feeling active opposition or hostility toward someone or something'

Iz it coz I oyinbo?

drnoel: Ma guy 50 dollars is cheap. If u want to give them something, then give them something. Don't come here and insult them, while insulting urself.

I didn't give them $50, I gave them just over $100, not that it is any of your business. Besides brother...how many of your friends have you given a $100 gift to recently?

If you are going to make comments, then at least have the correct facts. Don't come here and insult me, while insulting urself...abi?

Have a nice day my friend

Chillisauce: Ya! Going to win some money in my poker game !

The MGM or the Las Vegas Hilton...your choice lol

Chillisauce: I didn't even see this post before my last post...don't be an E-cry baby. You put too much value in money. Hence ur thread

Lmao As I have said, I just wanted to get the amount right...and I did.

I am sorry if I have hit a nerve. I was only joking. My advice is do not start what you cannot finish o.
(and you did start it )

See you in Las Vegas sweetheart

I am just playing too. Sorry o.

I probably went a bit too far, sorry o.

Chillisauce: All these your epistle for your small change o. The family is poor, the family is poor...na wa!

So you are not buying the ticket? Stingy boy!

All this epistle to make sure I got it right...and I am confident I did. They are poor, but so am I. I began wanting to wire them N8,000! Thanks to posters advice... it has risen to N17,000...so I am glad I took the time to do all this "epistle".

Maybe you have a very rich husband that spoils you and cares for your every want and need...and you have forgotten the value of money and kindness

I would love to buy the tickets...but only for someone that has a good heart, who can appreciate kindness, who isn't greedy and money focused. Sadly, from your post, I gather you are not that someone O dabo my friend

Chillisauce:

My birthday is coming up on November, I just wanna tell you now. Hopefully, by the time you create a thread for me and ask some questions it will be November . Hence my stating it now.

Btw, I won't take 17 k o, I just want a paid ticket and 4 days accommodation in las vegas. What say u?

A good deed is a good deed. They knew the 'gift' might take sometime to get there...and to be honest, they didn't care, because it doesn't matter. 17k is a lot to this family and besides, we have a saying in the west..."it is the thought that counts" (would they have preferred that I forgot about them?...and sent no 'gift' at all?).

You seem to have me mistaken for some millionaire banker! Sadly I am not, besides, there is more to life than money...friendship being one.

As for the Las Vegas comment...sorry o, I do not associate with 'oyinbo hunters!'