₦airaland Forum

Zooposki:
Mine will be made with shipping containers. I designed it myself. Amateur design. As of now I’m the only one that understands the design. Lol.

But don't you think it will be so expensive to maintain ? Seeing that containers are always hot
I used to love container houses but when I count the cost ,then I dropped it

My sister please don't bother yourself ,the guy does not deserve you ,he has issues with insecurity.

Can you please help me with your US contact ,am into auto dealer but I do Nigeria use.

Habby222:
Advice needed pls.

I've been with this guy for close to four years now and its not really been a perfect relationship. Lots of ups and downs due to what I can term insecurity. At some point we're cool and the next minute issues arises just like every other relationship.

He's a good guy to some extent as he showers me with love ( my thoughts)and a lot of times he gives gifts not money though. I've had to give financial assistance to him alot of times, he returns some if he deemed it necessary and doesn't return if he so wishes. I've never complained about this and still always willing to help him out whenever he is in need. Pls note that we're both financially ok.

This gesture of me offering him financial help stopped when I realise he doesn't do same to me. I've had to test him on serval occasions that I needed financial help and he has never for once helped out on those request despite knowing he has. I never needed the money though, I made those request to know if I could actually fall back to him if I'm in need.

Last year October, I told him about my plans of getting a new car as I got tired of the one I was using. Pls note that I did not request him to buy for me neither did I ask for any support whatsoever. I contacted my source in the US with my budget and spec, was able to find one in a short time and I paid for it. All of this moves were known to him. By December, the car arrived and cleared accordingly with every expenses incurred payed by me. He gave some moral support though.

A week after getting the car, he called me one morning and started apologising for not supporting financially in getting the car which I told him I had no issues with that. I told him I wasn't expecting more than moral support from him since I could afford getting the car on my own. I also made him realise he doesn't owe me no apology as I wasn't t his responsibility since we weren't married and that even if we were married, ill always want to get my stuffs myself as long as I can afford it. The next I heard was him ranting on phone that he doesn't expect less from me, said I'm a proud and that he knew I wasn't going to be a good wife. He said he has always known I wasn't going to be a submissive wife and a whole lot of other derogatory words despite not having issues whatsoever prior to that time. I ended the call as I was so surprised he could say those mean words to me.

All through that day he didn't call back and I did not as well cos I was expecting him to realise I was hurt by his actions. A week pass and still no call from him so I decided to call him and he didn't pick. I'd sent a lot of of messages to him and has not replied to any. I'd gone to his house to check up on him and not met him too. Its been three weeks now and we haven't spoken and seen despite all of my effort to talk to him and or see.

Guys please I'm confused and do not know how to handle the issue. Pls advice.

Neither you or your mum is to be blamed, it's the guy that is not discipline, going to an in laws place empty handed

You will make a good detective bro.

Jessepaid:
Hehehe...
She went to visit him on the 25th...
A few days later he called her parents to ask about her whereabouts...

A day after Christmas she was brought into a mortuary as an accident victim..

On normal circumstances I would say she died while going to see him..

But.. her sister claimed she was pregnant for him and he begged her to terminate which she refused to do...

So I see motive from the pastor to hide the baby by any means necessary..

Which can mean he called her to come over to discuss about the baby and orchestrated a murder to look like an accident..

Or

The victims sister is using the pregnancy story to hold the pastor responsible for her sisters death...


The police should question the mortuary to obtain the following..

Description of who brought the body?

Autopsy?

Where did the accident happen?

Was the body mutilated or had shown signs of severe bleeding prior to death?...

Other questions to be asked include but are not limited to the following...

Does the pastor own a car?

Does he have temperamental issues?

Is he a violent person?

How far is the pastor's house from the mortuary where the body was found?

Did the pastor have any substantial thing to lose if his secret was discovered? His name, his congregation, a promotion?

When they checked his house was it arranged or disorganized?

Question his neighbours also..

The pastor might be innocent....

The pastor might not be innocent...

Circumstances and certain situations can greatly affect reasoning and logic..

Thanks so much for this ,I must tell you the truth nothing scares me like marrying a lady in Nigeria and we get over there and she starts showing some silly character.

sweetmelanin:
Every now and again, I hear new stories about some men getting "betrayed" by a Nigerian spouse whom they've brought abroad.. however, I can't help but notice that they are often the cause of their own misfortune. As harsh as it sounds, some men have had to learn the hard way that ignorance and hero-complex will cost a man far more than he can ever bargain for..

Category 1: Those with a warped mindset of the " 'cultureless' akata"

My experience:
Let's go back to my uni days some years back.. the dating scene was wild, brutal and exciting.. back then, the disparity was huge between the "freshiees" and UK grown blacks (unlike today) .. but yet, I was opportuned to mix and mingle with so many young Nigerian guys who were in the UK as international students at the time.. some also young working professionals ( of which are still life-long friends of mine up till today)...

..whilst on the dating scene, I noticed that a lot of Nigerian guys seemed to have a mentality that "akata" girls were "too exposed" compared to Nigerian girls back home, so they played games with them, often ditching these girls to marry home-based chicks.. I remember having such a silly and childish dream of relocating to Nigeria back then . Hahha.. and thought I would end up with a "freshiie" who would 'take me back to the motherland'.. haha. though I ended up with someone with a migration story just like mine; we both moved to the UK as kids in the early 2000s.. and my husband is a male 'akata' to core ..with no intention whatsoever of moving back.

Truth be told, a lot of guys who had temporary flings with "akata" girls ended up moving back to Nigeria, and are still regretting their decision till today.. Many returned to find their girlfriends had moved on and married older men. Others attempted to bring their girlfriends here to find out they've been used as a mere stepping stone to "greener pastures".


Category 2: Those who used and dumped white women for papers and then brought their "ungrateful Nigerian wives" abroad.

Men who are desperate for papers often opt for the easy way out: marrying an older white woman (and in some cases a poor unsuspecting black woman from another African country who has papers) ... they do this with the mindset that they would bring their "real wife" from Nigeria.
Now when their 'wife' divorces them.. these men will scream betrayal, forgetting the trail of heartbreaks they've left behind.. Now how do such men think they will use a foreign woman, break her heart, and yet live happily ever after with an imported bride?? how??

In summary,

When I hear stories of bitter divorces and men killing their spouse whom they brought from Nigeria I can't help but think this could've been avoided if they focused on settling with a so called "akata". Yes, she may not feign fake 'submission' like home-based Nigerian chicks, but what makes her less likely to 'betray' or mess you up is the absence of entitlement mentality.
...someone coming directly from Nigeria typically has a dog eat dog mentality caused by an oppressive system of lack. Whereas an abroad based chick already learns not to depend on a man from as early as 16 - 17 years of age.. most already have part time jobs as students and know the value of working for their money.. they won't take crap but at least what you see is what you get.. abroad based girls (akatas) are not angels but are far better than the pretenders back home y'all believe are "wife materials".. but people generally hold on to an illusion over what is real.

stevmatt15:
Exactly, I wonder how they squandered their money
If not only women, cars and buildings, tell me what else would have exhausted their wealth. Just 1milion naira, and I will never be broke in my life again.

Haaa Bro,1m ke, I think that is too small ooo with Niger area present economy ?

Officialgarri:
I know so many people will come for me if this post makes FP.

But shouldn't we really ask ourselves... Why do we hardly see Westerners or Northerners being maltreated in other countries?
Why are they not accused of theft, fraud, e.t.c?

If we say it's witch-hunting, then how have other tribes escaped witch-hunting in other countries?

Oga and what's that suppose to mean ? can you please stop been tribalism bigot for once ,how sure are you that the guy really stole as claimed by the lady ? We are saying they killed our brother here you are promoting tribalism ,do you know if it will be your turn tomorrow ,don't worry a stupid Chinese will kill you partially and bribe a policeman who is from your tribe and claim you rape his dog tomorrow and no one will fight for you .

Kujoree45:
Wanted for what

To give them money,a property in the govt house and to give them Miss Calabar to marry
abi you no dey see mumu question

Rgade:
Nigerians and over hyping of foreign degrees
So we should clap for this dude for just reading and reading and reading, just stuffing his head with obsolete books and we're here celebrating him like he made some breakthrough.
Congrats though.

Bro,why are you like this now ? Why are you this pessimistic ?
Is the guy not better than those who go about constituting nuisance to/in our society ,shouting who goes there !
If I may ask ,when you are at his age what did you achieved ,if not the counting of babes you floored ?
As for me I feel so challenged ,cuz when I was at his age I was in my penultimate level of my first degree . Am so sure it was his age and level of intelligence that made his colleague approve him to be their president . So sir please celebrate good thing if just for once ,I know you won't be reacting this way, if the guy happens to be your junior bro or your cousin

Congratulations to our Igbo Amaka jare ,we your brothers from the Yoruba are proud of you,72 virgins await you fa

I will advise you do what will make people want to work with you next time

Record "lable" bah ? That's right

Hmmmmm,stalemate