Shokoloko:


You are now the second lady who could not decipher sarcasm. Midas was the first who did not. I just pray the third person isnt a lady, else these men will term ladies as "fish brain"

Who cares what any nitwit tags me as?

Habby222:
Advice needed pls.

I've been with this guy for close to four years now and its not really been a perfect relationship. Lots of ups and downs due to what I can term insecurity. At some point we're cool and the next minute issues arises just like every other relationship.

He's a good guy to some extent as he showers me with love ( my thoughts)and a lot of times he gives gifts not money though. I've had to give financial assistance to him alot of times, he returns some if he deemed it necessary and doesn't return if he so wishes. I've never complained about this and still always willing to help him out whenever he is in need. Pls note that we're both financially ok.

This gesture of me offering him financial help stopped when I realise he doesn't do same to me. I've had to test him on serval occasions that I needed financial help and he has never for once helped out on those request despite knowing he has. I never needed the money though, I made those request to know if I could actually fall back to him if I'm in need.

Last year October, I told him about my plans of getting a new car as I got tired of the one I was using. Pls note that I did not request him to buy for me neither did I ask for any support whatsoever. I contacted my source in the US with my budget and spec, was able to find one in a short time and I paid for it. All of this moves were known to him. By December, the car arrived and cleared accordingly with every expenses incurred payed by me. He gave some moral support though.

A week after getting the car, he called me one morning and started apologising for not supporting financially in getting the car which I told him I had no issues with that. I told him I wasn't expecting more than moral support from him since I could afford getting the car on my own. I also made him realise he doesn't owe me no apology as I wasn't t his responsibility since we weren't married and that even if we were married, ill always want to get my stuffs myself as long as I can afford it. The next I heard was him ranting on phone that he doesn't expect less from me, said I'm a proud and that he knew I wasn't going to be a good wife. He said he has always known I wasn't going to be a submissive wife and a whole lot of other derogatory words despite not having issues whatsoever prior to that time. I ended the call as I was so surprised he could say those mean words to me.

All through that day he didn't call back and I did not as well cos I was expecting him to realise I was hurt by his actions. A week pass and still no call from him so I decided to call him and he didn't pick. I'd sent a lot of of messages to him and has not replied to any. I'd gone to his house to check up on him and not met him too. Its been three weeks now and we haven't spoken and seen despite all of my effort to talk to him and or see.

Guys please I'm confused and do not know how to handle the issue. Pls advice.

1. You can buy a car for yourself, that means you are reasonably comfortable.
2. But you can't make decisions on serious issues concerning your life?

I'm sorry but I will be hard on you: you are not matured enough for marriage.

Maturity means being complete in your singleness so much that another complete person (of the opposite sex) will join in you so both of you become one.

People make the mistake of searching for someone who has what they lack. Please I'm not talking about money. For instance, a talkative likes a non talkative because "when I'm talking, he/she keeps quiet and that calms me down". That's so wrong. One day, he/she will turn that into a tool of manipulation or weapon of war against you. There's a character or habit or trait you're lacking that you see in that guy. That's why you think you love him. It's not love. Find out that character, trait, habit, develope it in you by yourself. Make yourself fully complete!

It's only ironic but in my 16+ years of marriage, I've come to discover one fact; it's only when you need nobody in your life that's when you're ready to have somebody in your life. The mathematics of marriage is not just two incomplete people becoming one. It's only two complete people that can become one. (One multiplied by one is one, but half (or quarter) multiplied by another half (or quarter) can never become one!

Op, to start with. Someone that you have bin with for 4 years and you both are financially stable without any end point in view, even if you add 2 more years to it. Nothing may change.

Advise to everyone- please don't allow anybody waste your time this 2021 only work with whatever is clearly said with supporting actions

Shortyy:

man

You don't need peace of mind, you just need a slave. Someone that will do anything you ask for without questioning you. And only a very poor and dumb woman will do that. A woman who knows what she wants won't oblige to every bullshit you tell her.

lol........it seems you're in a hurry with your keypad.
you twisted my words and came to your own conclusions.

lemme just give you straight up facts.

any woman that wants commitment from a reasonable man
should drop her ego and give him a sense of emotional security and stability. if a man feels truely loved and senses you'll always be there and patient with him.
he will be begging you for commitment.

funny enough it's usually women that came from rags to riches with a dysfunctional family that have this arrogant "self independent arrogant bullshit".

I see a lot of "I did this, i have done this, i can do this and i am going to do this" in your post.
This is not d language to use wen u truly love someone u intend to marry oh.
As a married couple with a kid, one of the battles we had to conquer in our marriage was this same self centred individualistic mindset most financially stable ladies posses. It doesn't work with African men maybe with a white man who was brought up to split bills with their spouses.
Let me be very clear, you're not submissive and that futuristic statement from u to ur man is an indication dat u r battle ready for him. That's scary. No man wants to battle with their life partner.

ifyebere:

You are one of those girls that will get the best advise and still reject it or make mockery of it.
That your lips like mouka Foam

Yet you wish for a girlfriend with my kind of mouka foam lips. Idiot

Descortes:
Lol. You are in love

Lol she's just in love ni

thebosstrevor1:
Insecured Men can not handle independent women.

He is financially not buoyant so he already feeling threatened.

If you are planning of marrying him, dont do it, you will regret it, his insecurities will make you go mad and might end up making the marriage filled with fights.

You don't want to be with a man that will accuse you of cheating, that will monitor your movements and accuse you of everything bad all because you have more money than him.

If he doesn't pick his call, ex him, go find for your levels.

This is the best comment n the bitter truth. Move on pls. Most guys likes dating rich ladies but gets threatened by the independence of such a lady. U cannot eat ur cake n have it

Insecurity.
Sister, you have to move on.
But don't allow another good Guy to suffer for what he knows nothing about .
Many ladies hardly show love to their partner, due to previous experience.
You're a Good Woman.

saydfact:


If in 4 years, they can't be good friends to themselves

If in 4 years, the guy has NEVER found a reason to assist her financially - even when she has asked on few occasions

If in 4 years, he's still complaining that she's proud (whether true or not)

MOVING ON is the only solution - before someone ends up killing the other (check the news sir).

FOUR YEARS IS NOT MOI-MOI BUT FOUR YEARS IS CHILD'S PLAY COMPARED TO EXPECTED 60 YEARS OR MORE OF MARRIAGE

Guy! I dated my for 10yrs (Though distance relationship) we quarrel settle disintegrate for almost 3yrs come back. Today we are best fiends, married with 2 kids. we hardly quarrel and when we had little issue we resolve it immediately.

Oluromantic:
What I see is incompatibility. I say so because what he did was wrong and your reaction also was mean. See lemme tell you one secret. When your partner does some extremely annoying things, it always wise not to obey your instinct of revenge because at long last, people won't see his wrong but blame you for your extreme reaction. That's the formula most men use to avoid physical abuse of their women.

You shouldn't have cut the call on him. And from the story, you seem to have had him in mind over his lack of support in previous times which was what pushed you to react that way, because if that wasn't the case, your conscience would strike you to call back and apologize for hanging up on him...that's the normal thing when in love.

Besides, waiting a whole week to call him back, truth be told, you seem to be emotionally stable than him and you're using it as strength against him. He seem more emotional, that's why he wanted to year you say something affectionate about taking his little offer of support for the car. If you had joked about it and gave him a tender feeling that you'll take his offer, that would have puffed up his masculinity and he'll feel honored. You need to study his psychic to know what response will soothe him.

You both need to open up to each other more. That issue of asking him for money because you have been the one supporting him was probably presented as a sudden rise of intelligence which he's not been used to from you. You shouldn't have presented it like "I can't afford it, I need your help". It would have been better if you had presented it like "I can afford it but I want ur support so I can remember you and brag of you" Not like a revenge strategy now but like I want your influence and aura in my things. That will not only make you wify but will also make him feel you believe in him. Wish I could advice you privately

correct man!

OP, d fact dat ur guy said those tins 2 u shows he was equally subjecting u to test lik u were doin n he came up wit these findings below: he wont b able 2 make final decisions cos of ur ego, (for instance, wld u av agreed if he had advised u forgo buying d car n invest d money instead first?). ur saying dat even if u were married to him u wld nt b needing his quota in ur decisions actually proves his finding above. he also found out dat u may decide to quit one day if u cld no longer tolerate his stand as d man n major decision maker of d home.my advice to u is dat, u av 2 watch ur ego n financial independence, dnt let dem com btw u n ur love life. start sending txts 2 him n apologise, n let him knw u didn't mean to make him a passive player in ur biz .

NeoWanZaeed:
This is one of the ups and down u said ur relationship do have. Just calm down. If u n0t feeling him, call it a quit. Marriage isnt joke. Been there and left

This boy(acclaimed salafi) who insults scholars at will is here putting mouth in boyfriend/Haram relationship issue

victorazyvictor:


Guy! I dated my for 10yrs (Though distance relationship) we quarrel settle disintegrate for almost 3yrs come back. Today we are best fiends, married with 2 kids. we hardly quarrel and when we had little issue we resolve it immediately.

I dated my wife for 10 years also - why u had the luxury of long distance relationship (WHICH ALLOWS FOR MINIMAL MISUNDERSTANDING) - We were living 3 streets apart.....

Now married for 11 years (21 years) with 3 kids...

SO..... ?

Life continues, I don't think you can't cope with him when both of you are legally married, nothing wrong for a wife to buy her own things with her money once her husband's is in the know of what she's buying.

Pray very well before you marry. Some people marry their enemies o.

Oluromantic:
What I see is incompatibility. I say so because what he did was wrong and your reaction also was mean. See lemme tell you one secret. When your partner does some extremely annoying things, it always wise not to obey your instinct of revenge because at long last, people won't see his wrong but blame you for your extreme reaction. That's the formula most men use to avoid physical abuse of their women.

You shouldn't have cut the call on him. And from the story, you seem to have had him in mind over his lack of support in previous times which was what pushed you to react that way, because if that wasn't the case, your conscience would strike you to call back and apologize for hanging up on him...that's the normal thing when in love.

Besides, waiting a whole week to call him back, truth be told, you seem to be emotionally stable than him and you're using it as strength against him. He seem more emotional, that's why he wanted to year you say something affectionate about taking his little offer of support for the car. If you had joked about it and gave him a tender feeling that you'll take his offer, that would have puffed up his masculinity and he'll feel honored. You need to study his psychic to know what response will soothe him.

You both need to open up to each other more. That issue of asking him for money because you have been the one supporting him was probably presented as a sudden rise of intelligence which he's not been used to from you. You shouldn't have presented it like "I can't afford it, I need your help". It would have been better if you had presented it like "I can afford it but I want ur support so I can remember you and brag of you" Not like a revenge strategy now but like I want your influence and aura in my things. That will not only make you wify but will also make him feel you believe in him. Wish I could advice you privately

Spot on. You're very smart.

Nazgul:
My dear let him be. He's very childish and insecure, guys like that will prefer to see you broke and miserable crawling to him every now and then to tell him your problem while he mocks and indirectly insult you before giving you less than half of the financial assistance you requested for, than succeed.

People like him would rather die than see you climb up the ladder of your career. They will always frown at every success you make and fight tooth and nail go pull you down, they will never ever celebrate geninuely with you on your personal achievements, cos to him you're competing and rubbing shoulders with him. His ego will always see you as a proud, disrespectful, uncultured creature, regardless of the efforts you put in to make that relationship work.

My advice? Let him go. I know it hurts considering the fact that you trusted him with your heart, but believe me, he doesn't deserve you. He'll do worse to you in future if you guys get married. You'll definitely get a more confident and mature guy who will love and value you.

If you were in her shoes, will you let him go?

Easier said than done.

**Shutting down my lappy**

Is obvious he isn't really into you.

Habby222:
Advice needed pls.

I've been with this guy for close to four years now and its not really been a perfect relationship. Lots of ups and downs due to what I can term insecurity. At some point we're cool and the next minute issues arises just like every other relationship.

He's a good guy to some extent as he showers me with love ( my thoughts)and a lot of times he gives gifts not money though. I've had to give financial assistance to him alot of times, he returns some if he deemed it necessary and doesn't return if he so wishes. I've never complained about this and still always willing to help him out whenever he is in need. Pls note that we're both financially ok.

This gesture of me offering him financial help stopped when I realise he doesn't do same to me. I've had to test him on serval occasions that I needed financial help and he has never for once helped out on those request despite knowing he has. I never needed the money though, I made those request to know if I could actually fall back to him if I'm in need.

Last year October, I told him about my plans of getting a new car as I got tired of the one I was using. Pls note that I did not request him to buy for me neither did I ask for any support whatsoever. I contacted my source in the US with my budget and spec, was able to find one in a short time and I paid for it. All of this moves were known to him. By December, the car arrived and cleared accordingly with every expenses incurred payed by me. He gave some moral support though.

A week after getting the car, he called me one morning and started apologising for not supporting financially in getting the car which I told him I had no issues with that. I told him I wasn't expecting more than moral support from him since I could afford getting the car on my own. I also made him realise he doesn't owe me no apology as I wasn't t his responsibility since we weren't married and that even if we were married, ill always want to get my stuffs myself as long as I can afford it. The next I heard was him ranting on phone that he doesn't expect less from me, said I'm a proud and that he knew I wasn't going to be a good wife. He said he has always known I wasn't going to be a submissive wife and a whole lot of other derogatory words despite not having issues whatsoever prior to that time. I ended the call as I was so surprised he could say those mean words to me.

All through that day he didn't call back and I did not as well cos I was expecting him to realise I was hurt by his actions. A week pass and still no call from him so I decided to call him and he didn't pick. I'd sent a lot of of messages to him and has not replied to any. I'd gone to his house to check up on him and not met him too. Its been three weeks now and we haven't spoken and seen despite all of my effort to talk to him and or see.

Guys please I'm confused and do not know how to handle the issue. Pls advice.

That guy has alot of insecurities.

Stay away from a man with inferiority complex. He can't put up with you.

SissyAda:
Op, to start with. Someone that you have bin with for 4 years and you both are financially stable without any end point in view, even if you add 2 more years to it. Nothing may change.

Advise to everyone- please don't allow anybody waste your time this 2021 only work with whatever is clearly said with supporting actions

Your second paragraph is so on point. No time to waste Time, actions speak louder than words.

First, he is not happy his woman purchased a new car.

His inferiority complex is presented in the fact that he called after a week of the car arriving that he could not assist. He has money issues. The girl still said, No problem about you not contributing to the car. I wasn't expecting help.

Go and marry penniless slay queen and compare with an intelligent independent woman. There is always an over do in everybody's character. But I don't seem to see any arrogance in this lady's acts.

Though I'm not there in person. The guy will make a reasonable woman go insane with his stupidity. I've encountered alot of insecure men in life. This one is prominent.

People pray for good things in life and better days.

Lady, this man will never rejoice with you when you make new achievements in life or get a promotion.

He is a JOY KILLER.

My sister please don't bother yourself ,the guy does not deserve you ,he has issues with insecurity.

Can you please help me with your US contact ,am into auto dealer but I do Nigeria use.

Habby222:
Advice needed pls.

I've been with this guy for close to four years now and its not really been a perfect relationship. Lots of ups and downs due to what I can term insecurity. At some point we're cool and the next minute issues arises just like every other relationship.

He's a good guy to some extent as he showers me with love ( my thoughts)and a lot of times he gives gifts not money though. I've had to give financial assistance to him alot of times, he returns some if he deemed it necessary and doesn't return if he so wishes. I've never complained about this and still always willing to help him out whenever he is in need. Pls note that we're both financially ok.

This gesture of me offering him financial help stopped when I realise he doesn't do same to me. I've had to test him on serval occasions that I needed financial help and he has never for once helped out on those request despite knowing he has. I never needed the money though, I made those request to know if I could actually fall back to him if I'm in need.

Last year October, I told him about my plans of getting a new car as I got tired of the one I was using. Pls note that I did not request him to buy for me neither did I ask for any support whatsoever. I contacted my source in the US with my budget and spec, was able to find one in a short time and I paid for it. All of this moves were known to him. By December, the car arrived and cleared accordingly with every expenses incurred payed by me. He gave some moral support though.

A week after getting the car, he called me one morning and started apologising for not supporting financially in getting the car which I told him I had no issues with that. I told him I wasn't expecting more than moral support from him since I could afford getting the car on my own. I also made him realise he doesn't owe me no apology as I wasn't t his responsibility since we weren't married and that even if we were married, ill always want to get my stuffs myself as long as I can afford it. The next I heard was him ranting on phone that he doesn't expect less from me, said I'm a proud and that he knew I wasn't going to be a good wife. He said he has always known I wasn't going to be a submissive wife and a whole lot of other derogatory words despite not having issues whatsoever prior to that time. I ended the call as I was so surprised he could say those mean words to me.

All through that day he didn't call back and I did not as well cos I was expecting him to realise I was hurt by his actions. A week pass and still no call from him so I decided to call him and he didn't pick. I'd sent a lot of of messages to him and has not replied to any. I'd gone to his house to check up on him and not met him too. Its been three weeks now and we haven't spoken and seen despite all of my effort to talk to him and or see.

Guys please I'm confused and do not know how to handle the issue. Pls advice.

Boyfriend and girlfriend relationship, I do not share in that concept, especially if sex is involved. Someone will always feel hurt or cheated.

When you are ready, meet someone and get married.

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I don't have much to say, but please take out LOVE from your head first so that you reason very well.

LOVE had taking over you and makes you not to see and feel the kind of person you are dealing with.

Think outside love and you will be able to see him through.

I'm not saying that I made sense though.

My dear, sorry for what happened between you people. Devil is a liar and he has failed over you people. Apologise to him. Tell him you are serious even though to you you are not wrong, but do it. Do the following henceforth to take your relationship to the higher level which will continue while married to him eventually :
- always put him first in the picture of anything you want to do in life
- give him sense of Belonging all the time as your number one fan after God
- never see him as your rival or you are in competition with him
- never give room for feminism in your relationship with him
- make your total submission to him as non negotiable.
I am very sure if you had handled the case differently, you won't found yourself in this scenario.
My dear, the car is giving me problems. What do you think if we change it?. With this position you took, you have involved him from onset, and you should allow him to handle the whole process of choice of choosing, placement of order, payment, clearance, registration. Etc. Since you have the cash, with humility, Transfer the cash to him and trust him for proper handling and execution of it since your relationship is 4 years plus. At least
trust is built already. Don't give him that attitude that it is my money I work for it I can spend it as I like I don't need his permission to do whatever I like with it. Yes you are right, but your type of man may not like that stuff. If you can not do or practice such life with him, you can chicken out and look for your type. But please safe your relationship

Habby222:
Advice needed pls.

I've been with this guy for close to four years now and its not really been a perfect relationship. Lots of ups and downs due to what I can term insecurity. At some point we're cool and the next minute issues arises just like every other relationship.

He's a good guy to some extent as he showers me with love ( my thoughts)and a lot of times he gives gifts not money though. I've had to give financial assistance to him alot of times, he returns some if he deemed it necessary and doesn't return if he so wishes. I've never complained about this and still always willing to help him out whenever he is in need. Pls note that we're both financially ok.

This gesture of me offering him financial help stopped when I realise he doesn't do same to me. I've had to test him on serval occasions that I needed financial help and he has never for once helped out on those request despite knowing he has. I never needed the money though, I made those request to know if I could actually fall back to him if I'm in need.

Last year October, I told him about my plans of getting a new car as I got tired of the one I was using. Pls note that I did not request him to buy for me neither did I ask for any support whatsoever. I contacted my source in the US with my budget and spec, was able to find one in a short time and I paid for it. All of this moves were known to him. By December, the car arrived and cleared accordingly with every expenses incurred payed by me. He gave some moral support though.

A week after getting the car, he called me one morning and started apologising for not supporting financially in getting the car which I told him I had no issues with that. I told him I wasn't expecting more than moral support from him since I could afford getting the car on my own. I also made him realise he doesn't owe me no apology as I wasn't t his responsibility since we weren't married and that even if we were married, ill always want to get my stuffs myself as long as I can afford it. The next I heard was him ranting on phone that he doesn't expect less from me, said I'm a proud and that he knew I wasn't going to be a good wife. He said he has always known I wasn't going to be a submissive wife and a whole lot of other derogatory words despite not having issues whatsoever prior to that time. I ended the call as I was so surprised he could say those mean words to me.

All through that day he didn't call back and I did not as well cos I was expecting him to realise I was hurt by his actions. A week pass and still no call from him so I decided to call him and he didn't pick. I'd sent a lot of of messages to him and has not replied to any. I'd gone to his house to check up on him and not met him too. Its been three weeks now and we haven't spoken and seen despite all of my effort to talk to him and or see.

Guys please I'm confused and do not know how to handle the issue. Pls advice.

At this age you want me to tell you that insecure men is equivalent to a whoring woman? You better look for someone with a bigger picture to life than you yourself else it will not work.

jubianose:


There is more to this story. You have not given us the full gist.
But where is he so we may ask him naa??

Yea, more to it but we already know. An independent woman is a decision maker, she does her thing with or without the consent of the man but an average Nigerian man want that respect and submission yet, they dont want to pay the bills. Its a case of eat a cake and still have it. The guy wants her woman to seek for approval before anything which wont work with an independent woman. The two are not compatible... The woman should go look for a beta male not alpha or an intelligent simp otherwise, she will suffer. The guy should go look for submissive dependent girl which i know, he can't pay the bills still. There wahala

Habby222:
Advice needed pls.

I've been with this guy for close to four years now and its not really been a perfect relationship. Lots of ups and downs due to what I can term insecurity. At some point we're cool and the next minute issues arises just like every other relationship.

He's a good guy to some extent as he showers me with love ( my thoughts)and a lot of times he gives gifts not money though. I've had to give financial assistance to him alot of times, he returns some if he deemed it necessary and doesn't return if he so wishes. I've never complained about this and still always willing to help him out whenever he is in need. Pls note that we're both financially ok.

This gesture of me offering him financial help stopped when I realise he doesn't do same to me. I've had to test him on serval occasions that I needed financial help and he has never for once helped out on those request despite knowing he has. I never needed the money though, I made those request to know if I could actually fall back to him if I'm in need.

Last year October, I told him about my plans of getting a new car as I got tired of the one I was using. Pls note that I did not request him to buy for me neither did I ask for any support whatsoever. I contacted my source in the US with my budget and spec, was able to find one in a short time and I paid for it. All of this moves were known to him. By December, the car arrived and cleared accordingly with every expenses incurred payed by me. He gave some moral support though.

A week after getting the car, he called me one morning and started apologising for not supporting financially in getting the car which I told him I had no issues with that. I told him I wasn't expecting more than moral support from him since I could afford getting the car on my own. I also made him realise he doesn't owe me no apology as I wasn't t his responsibility since we weren't married and that even if we were married, ill always want to get my stuffs myself as long as I can afford it. The next I heard was him ranting on phone that he doesn't expect less from me, said I'm a proud and that he knew I wasn't going to be a good wife. He said he has always known I wasn't going to be a submissive wife and a whole lot of other derogatory words despite not having issues whatsoever prior to that time. I ended the call as I was so surprised he could say those mean words to me.

All through that day he didn't call back and I did not as well cos I was expecting him to realise I was hurt by his actions. A week pass and still no call from him so I decided to call him and he didn't pick. I'd sent a lot of of messages to him and has not replied to any. I'd gone to his house to check up on him and not met him too. Its been three weeks now and we haven't spoken and seen despite all of my effort to talk to him and or see.

Guys please I'm confused and do not know how to handle the issue. Pls advice.

Read below... The two of you are not compatible. Look for an intelligent simp or a carefree guy. Its not easy to be independent, please dont let any man intimidate or blackmail you emotionally on top your money. Enjoy your money with a guy who understands the life of a high value woman.



Yea, more to it but we already know. An independent woman is a decision maker, she does her thing with or without the consent of the man but an average Nigerian man want that respect and submission yet, they dont want to pay the bills. Its a case of eat a cake and still have it. The guy wants her woman to seek for approval before anything which wont work with an independent woman. The two are not compatible... The woman should go look for a beta male not alpha or an intelligent simp otherwise, she will suffer. The guy should go look for submissive dependent girl which i know, he can't pay the bills still. There wahala

[quote author=Habby222 post=97958122]Advice needed pls.

I've been with this guy for close to four years now and its not really been a perfect relationship. Lots of ups and downs due to what I can term insecurity. At some point we're cool and the next minute issues arises just like every other relationship.

He's a good guy to some extent as he showers me with love ( my thoughts)and a lot of times he gives gifts not money though. I've had to give financial assistance to him alot of times, he returns some if he deemed it necessary and doesn't return if he so wishes. I've never complained about this and still always willing to help him out whenever he is in need. Pls note that we're both financially ok.

This gesture of me offering him financial help stopped when I realise he doesn't do same to me. I've had to test him on serval occasions that I needed financial help and he has never for once helped out on those request despite knowing he has. I never needed the money though, I made those request to know if I could actually fall back to him if I'm in need.

Last year October, I told him about my plans of getting a new car as I got tired of the one I was using. Pls note that I did not request him to buy for me neither did I ask for any support whatsoever. I contacted my source in the US with my budget and spec, was able to find one in a short time and I paid for it. All of this moves were known to him. By December, the car arrived and cleared accordingly with every expenses incurred payed by me. He gave some moral support though.

A week after getting the car, he called me one morning and started apologising for not supporting financially in getting the car which I told him I had no issues with that. I told him I wasn't expecting more than moral support from him since I could afford getting the car on my own. I also made him realise he doesn't owe me no apology as I wasn't t his responsibility since we weren't married and that even if we were married, ill always want to get my stuffs myself as long as I can afford it. The next I heard was him ranting on phone that he doesn't expect less from me, said I'm a proud and that he knew I wasn't going to be a good wife. He said he has always known I wasn't going to be a submissive wife and a whole lot of other derogatory words despite not having issues whatsoever prior to that time. I ended the call as I was so surprised he could say those mean words to me.

All through that day he didn't call back and I did not as well cos I was expecting him to realise I was hurt by his actions. A week pass and still no call from him so I decided to call him and he didn't pick. I'd sent a lot of of messages to him and has not replied to any. I'd gone to his house to check up on him and not met him too. Its been three weeks now and we haven't spoken and seen despite all of my effort to talk to him and or see.

Guys please I'm confused and do not know how to handle the issue. Pls advice.
have you been to his Office?
abi he works from home

Habby222:
Advice needed pls.

I've been with this guy for close to four years now and its not really been a perfect relationship. Lots of ups and downs due to what I can term insecurity. At some point we're cool and the next minute issues arises just like every other relationship.

He's a good guy to some extent as he showers me with love ( my thoughts)and a lot of times he gives gifts not money though. I've had to give financial assistance to him alot of times, he returns some if he deemed it necessary and doesn't return if he so wishes. I've never complained about this and still always willing to help him out whenever he is in need. Pls note that we're both financially ok.

This gesture of me offering him financial help stopped when I realise he doesn't do same to me. I've had to test him on serval occasions that I needed financial help and he has never for once helped out on those request despite knowing he has. I never needed the money though, I made those request to know if I could actually fall back to him if I'm in need.

Last year October, I told him about my plans of getting a new car as I got tired of the one I was using. Pls note that I did not request him to buy for me neither did I ask for any support whatsoever. I contacted my source in the US with my budget and spec, was able to find one in a short time and I paid for it. All of this moves were known to him. By December, the car arrived and cleared accordingly with every expenses incurred payed by me. He gave some moral support though.

A week after getting the car, he called me one morning and started apologising for not supporting financially in getting the car which I told him I had no issues with that. I told him I wasn't expecting more than moral support from him since I could afford getting the car on my own. I also made him realise he doesn't owe me no apology as I wasn't t his responsibility since we weren't married and that even if we were married, ill always want to get my stuffs myself as long as I can afford it. The next I heard was him ranting on phone that he doesn't expect less from me, said I'm a proud and that he knew I wasn't going to be a good wife. He said he has always known I wasn't going to be a submissive wife and a whole lot of other derogatory words despite not having issues whatsoever prior to that time. I ended the call as I was so surprised he could say those mean words to me.

All through that day he didn't call back and I did not as well cos I was expecting him to realise I was hurt by his actions. A week pass and still no call from him so I decided to call him and he didn't pick. I'd sent a lot of of messages to him and has not replied to any. I'd gone to his house to check up on him and not met him too. Its been three weeks now and we haven't spoken and seen despite all of my effort to talk to him and or see.

Guys please I'm confused and do not know how to handle the issue. Pls advice.

I don't need to hear his own side of the story, kindly move on with your life. You deserve someone better!!!