₦airaland Forum

herolaw:
my is feb 11

Mins is Feb 12th.

acenazt:
Yeah my dad had one. His friends still call him BULLET.

Did u ask for d story behind d name?

Chai, bullet!

The headmaster was once a schoolboy. The teacher was once a student. Your father was once a teenager, then a youth.

I ran into my father and his peers sitting out together, sharing banters and calling each other names from the past. It's a welcome sight to see these senior citizens catch hearty moments and even throw obscene jokes at each other. Their jokes were so obscene you would have to put it in "sexuality section" if it were to be on nairaland. Life, the say, is in stages.

As I sat with them, one thing struck me. These "old boys" used to have wicked nicknames. The other one was called "baby but why", and the story behind the name is even more hilarious, something to do with a heartbreak in school. Another was called "Crackers".A bearded old man in his sixties responded to the name "buran tashi", and I was like "what the ****!". "Suspense" was the nickname of another sixty something year old man, and as the night grew older, I began to see my father a different man. His own nickname even got me rolling. "High-sky" was his nickname in school. apparently, he got high once n said stuff about the sky. Another of my father's mate was called "Agbegilodo" cos of d shape of his head. These guys had a life afterall! They are not the "boring old men" I used to think they were. It's just that time had pulled a fast one on them.

All my life, my father and mother have tried to be role models so we can have reasonable examples to copy from. They moulded us with love and care and guarded their conducts so much you would think they were perfect.This one night out with my old man and his peers helped to change the way I look at my parents, in a good way. Back in school I was almost saintly, thinking that nicknames were for bad boys. But alas, respectable and responsible old men in their sixties once had nicknames in their twenties, and they still turned out right by societal standards.

My father once had a nickname as a youth. I have a nickname too! And my child would get to know d name soon enough, and I would give him one if he doesn't chose for himself.

Source: my brain

veave:
Hmmmn...


Why would your wife cheat?
Kai!

No disrespect to the tribe...but it's almost their default mode. lived there for a while, and it's almost normal for the women there to cheat. The men there live with that reality.

Worst thing is, when d men get tough about d cheating ways, d women get diabolical. "Many have gone" when they confronted and emarassed d cheating wives.

It's a vicious cycle, dear. Mother to daughter....

Wish him good health. though I don't agree with his action, I think a man with conviction is better than a man with none.

prettythicksme:
anyway some guys will still find her cute &sexy!! #she even gat six packs

Count again o...na 8 packs me I see

1. I travel for over six hours….as I just enta town….see wetin one boy ask me ‘””are u back”””‘ I was like ””no, I’m front”
2. My guy see twins come dey ask me; o boy na twins be this? Ans: no na picmix.
3. I was watching football nd a friend came and said ‘guy u dey watch ball’ well i tell am say i won pay their salary.
4. This one na question wey ppl dey ask me every morning::: Am like-good
morning sir ! I was like morning, you don wake? Am like -no , I still dey sleep
5. I called my ex….nd she said did u just call my phone? I was like no o I call ur battery.
6. My guy ask me were I was and I told him am in bank, he said What is happening there? I go uproot cassava
7. Opening the gates to drive out and my neighbour asks me. U dey comot? No, na me be the new gateman.
8. I dey watch film… my guy enta come ask me na film u dey watch noo I dey worship TV.
9. Seeing me eating indomie com ask na Wetin u dey chop? na gen rope 2geda wit charger wire. Chai!
10. One Northerner been ask me say Na who Host brazil 2014?? I tell am say na Lokoja. Him com agree. Hehehe.
11. U see gen dey on still dey ask una on gen? Nooo, na gen on us, com plug ur charger For my nose.
12. My guy saw me, and he foolishly ask me guy na you be that??. I was like no o na my Grand father wey he young
13. A game freak was passionately tapping his PSP n his girlfriend said. U dey play game? Him reply wit anger... I dey practice hw 2 press bosom.
14. I mistakenly cut my thumb wit razor n my frnd asks... Y u come cut ursef
na? I say my blood too much I wan reduce am !
15. Me n my friend dey argue him com say u dey talk 2 me, I say nooo, I dey talk to the spirit of our great grand parents.

By Chioma Obinna
Contrary to the earlier three months period given by the World Health organisation, WHO, for Ebola survivors to abstain from unprotected sex, further investigations by United States’  Centre for Disease Control, CDC, has shown that survivors may have to wait for a longer period.
The CDC report recommended that contact with semen from male Ebola survivors be avoided until more information regarding the duration and infectiousness of viral shedding in body fluids is determined.
This is coming on the heels of the recent traces of the Ebola virus found in the semen of an Ebola survivor six months after being declared virus-free.
Doctors are now working to uncover whether or not this is an isolated occurrence, but for the time being health officials are advising all Ebola survivors to either abstain from sex or use condoms until more information is available.
The CDC in the statement indicated that those who survived Ebola Virus Disease, EVD, may as well habour the disease which they could transmit to others through sexual intercourse.
According to the statement, “The investigation identified only one epidemiologic link to Ebola: unprotected vaginal intercourse with a survivor.  Published reports from previous out-breaks have demonstrated Ebola survivors can continue to harbour virus in immunologically privileged sites for a period of time after convalescence,” the CDC said.
The statement added that “Ebola virus has been isolated from semen as long as 82 days after symptom onset and viral RNA has been detected in semen up to 101 days after symptom onset.
“One instance of possible sexual transmission of Ebola has been reported, although the accompanying evidence was inconclusive.”
CDC said the report is based on investigation by the government of Liberia.
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It took him 30 hours to cover the 134 KM Maiduguri-Damaturu road and the trekker says he hopes to reach Abuja in the next three weeks.



Yeah right. Like he does over 30km per hour on foot. Tell that to the (marines)mopol...

Naira can equal dollar. We just have to redenominate.

Rose2014:
While my Yoruba brothers from the other side have been defending him all day and all night.
They defend anything they hear about Buhari 24hours a day whether good or bad. They think because u voted a president,he'll be putting food on your table. High hopes that'll soon be dashed.

My candid advise my people: May 30th will still today for instance, you have to go out there n work hard like your mates are doing , if u want to make it.
No need for all these blind followership

I smell hate in ur write up. U MAY have a point, but ur articulation only shows ur deep rooted ethnic sentiments.

Anyway, we love or hate it, God has anointed him president, and that's what he ll be for the next 4 yrs come May29.

Sorry, but reality hurts sometimes.

Damage control or sincerity?

We de watch o!

Lalasticlala, d name dat moves mountains...come give Nigerians this topic make dem digest...

By Levinus Nwabughiogu
ABUJA—President-elect, General Muhammadu Buhari (retd), said yesterday that he was not aware of the temporary ban imposed on African Independent Television, AIT, not to cover his official functions.

Chief Raymond Dokpesi and President-elect Buhari
Consequently, he instructed all his aides, including the security team, to steer clear of all media activities and allow those assigned the responsibility to solely play the role with their colleagues.
In a statement in Abuja yesterday by Directorate of Media and Publicity of All Progressives Congress, APC, Presidential Campaign Council, Buhari said he read about the ban in the papers, stressing that he was neither consulted nor informed about the development.
The President-elect, however, aligned himself with the pronouncement of his party, which had since reversed the ban on AIT.
According to him, sticking to the ban can only bring the party at par with the outgoing People’s Democratic Party, PDP.
Buhari said: “I would like everyone to henceforth stay within his/her defined area of responsibility.
“The time of change has come and we must avoid making the same mistakes as the outgoing government.”

http://www.vanguardngr.com/2015/04/i-am-not-aware-of-ban-on-ait-says-buhari/

The left-back admits that Manuel Pellegrini's side may need to take a leaf out of the Blues' book if they are to reclaim their English title next season

By Sacha Pisani
Apr 29, 2015 11:21:00
Gael Clichy thinks Manchester City must learn from Chelsea's ability to win at all costs if they want to return to the top of the Premier League.

Jose Mourinho's side have been criticised by some for their pragmatic approach this season but are just two wins away from winning the Premier League title following their 0-0 draw with Arsenal at the weekend.

City sit 10 points behind the Blues and Clichy concedes that he and his team-mates may need to take note of Chelsea's ability to win ugly if they are to reclaim their Premier League title next season.

"People are saying Jose Mourinho plays defensive football and his team doesn't like to attack," he said. "They've won a lot of games by one goal but at the end of the day you just look at the trophies.

"Sometimes in football you just need to be able to win games, even when you are not playing well.

"This season there have been times when we have lost games instead of maybe settling for a draw whereas Chelsea have made sure that if they don't win their games, they don't lose them either. And that has been the difference this year.

"The two games we played against them I think we played better than them, created more chances and had more possession but on each occasion we shared the points."

Clichy added: "Our philosophy at this club is to play attractive football and score lots of goals but at the same time you have to give credit where it's due and Chelsea have been the best team this season.

"If Chelsea needed five points to win the title and had to draw five games to be champions they would get those five draws and do it. Probably no other team in the league could do that. So they must be doing something right."




http://m.goal.com/s/en/news/11243122?ICID=HP

Chairman, Dangote Group, Alhaji Aliko Dangote has announced plans to invest about N500 billion, an equivalent of $2.5 billion in the construction of two sub-sea 550-kilometer gas pipelines in Nigeria. The project, according to a report by Bloomberg yesterday, will boost Nigeria’s gas output by three trillion cubic feet per day. Dangote disclosed that the laying of the pipes is expected to begin before the end of the year, adding that the first pipeline should be ready by the middle of 2017.
According to Dangote, the gas pipeline project which will run from the oil producing regions of the Niger Delta to Lagos State, is expected to be co-financed by the International Finance Corporation, IFC, and global private equity firms — Carlyle Group LP and Blackstone Group LP. Dangote stated that the pipeline project will increase the amount of gas available in Nigeria to four billion standard cubic feet per day from one billion cubic feet.
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http://www.vanguardngr.com/2015/04/dangote-to-invest-n500bn-in-two-550km-gas-pipeline/

Cc puskin

CFCfan:
I believe after the scrapping and merging, the following ministries should exist:
1. Defense
2. Foreign Affairs
3.Justice ministry
4. Finance
5. Commerce
6. Energy (merger of petroleum and Power)
7. Works and housing
8. Health
9. Labour
10. Education
11. FCT
12. Aviation
13. Agriculture
14. Communication
15. Internal Affairs

Modify no 14. Information and communication

Additional;

16. Mines and industry
17. Social Welfare(women affairs and youth)
18. Power should be separated from petroleum.

Mama Peace had to have d last laff on this.

babamadiba:
Is usher a corper?

That him trousers abi? D thing be like NYSC khaki

blessingee:
So u believe this poo? Overheating dey do u o

Can't contribute to a discussion without attempting to insult...how typical.

That said, my point is, d op made a point thru d story, that it's not about how much u spend for d wedding( a one-day ceremony by the way), but the fact that he is married without spending so much. Must of us break our backs to have elaborate ceremonies just to service our larger-than-life egos.

I envy those who are more focused on what makes them tick, and don't give a hoot what others will think about em.

[quote author=ENIGMA24 post=32854127][/quote]Remember that the guy mentioned that he had already done d trad rites before spending d N50k. D guy has chosen his path. Ain't got no moral qualms with his actions. No religion will condemn his action. Nothing morally or ethically wrong with it. Lets cut d guy some slack, tolerate other people's views and learn lessons where they are available.

If no be say we be proud people for this our country, wetin d guy do for receive positive acknowledgement from people and not criticism.

mrking3:
@OP stop giving us zobo here!! Even 50k can't be enough to celebrate one's birthday let alone of wedding!! You can't tell this honourable house of nairaland that you bought 2 bags of rice which I know is worth 20k, bought packs of fish and other miscellaneous expenses with 30k!! That's trash man! [b]WHAT IS WORTH DOING IS WORTH DOING WELL! [/b]You ended up embarrassing yourself before your inlaws and the entire whole village! You should have saved up atleast 200k for an average wedding I wonder why the rush in the first place when you aint even ready!! I'm planning to do my white and Trad this year and I've tried all I can to make an average budget evrything will cost about 400k. That's even the minimum!!! For both traditional Rites which include marriage LIST, Trad, and white wedding. All will be done same day just to save cost. When I saw your thread I got attracted to read how you made it with just 50k but then, that's way below average! Just CLASSLESS! How do you do such lifetime event without serving people with common pure water, mineral and meat? Wow!! Who does that? Shameful bro!!!

Oga, wedding is not marriage...it is only d beginning. when we emphasise wedding above marriage...

That said, op is married with N50k. If u like, spend N10m, u will only end up married. Same as him. QED.

deeptesting:
Hello fellow NL, i am a single father with 2 kids from a previous marriage.I want to give marriage a second shot because i believe love is real but i don't want to have a child from it..Is it possible to get a lady that will agree to my wish?

PS: I don't want a single parent lady.

I know a lady. Please inbox me for details. This is no attempt at scam.

I had to dig into the archives and get this piece out. Now we understand where OBJ got the $200m he supposedly returned to the treasury.

General News | 11 September 2011   14:39 CET
OIL BONUS: GEJ GETS $200M AS 'KICKBACK' MONTHLY?

By huhuonline.com




The motivation behind President Goodluck Jonathan unwavering support for the corrupt and incompetent Deziani Allison Madueke as oil minister may have unraveled, as Goodluck Jonathan is alleged to be receiving about $200 million as monthly kick -back of

the country's oil earnings as president.
Wikileaks has revealed that this kick-back tradition was perfected by President Obasanjo`s administration. According to the kick-back arrangement, NNPC set aside USD 1.00 per barrel of Nigerian oil sold as a special offer from the coffers of the Nigeria National Petroleum Commission (NNPC) to the President. 

Nigeria has produced about 2.17 million barrels per day of oil at a higher oil price of around $90 pb although it is contending with the recent slide in production to 1.8 million bpd.

Huhuonline.com http://Huhuonline.com/ sources say that Maitama Sule, former Nigerian ambassador to the United Nations (1979-1983) and confidant of President Umaru Yar'Adua, recently disclosed that former First Lady Turai Yar'Adua is involved in corrupt practices, and especially real estate fraud.

Sule is said to have also exempted former President Yar'Adua from corruption as he was said to have severally turned down monetary offerings to the tune of $60 million, by the NNPC despite the fact that NNPC allocated USD 1.00 per barrel of Nigerian oil sold as a type of personal payment or "kickback" to the President. 

While Yar'Adua reportedly ordered his "share" to be deposited into the nation's treasury, Sule claimed that the First Lady pocketed her husband's reported share, while Senate President David Mark and House Speake, Dimeji Bankole pocketed USD 0.50/barrel, totalling $30 million. 

In light of the possibility that Obasanjo could have stolen billions of dollars under this arrangement, Sule  said that Yar'Adua told him that he may use this information, perhaps one day in the near future, to indict Obasanjo for corruption. 

The problem however, according to Sule, rested in the fact that Yar'Adua recognized that if he were to pursue Obasanjo, he may unwittingly subject his wife and close advisers to greater scrutiny, and risk his own political careerl.

Complete Text of Wikileaks Naratives, reads:
NIGERIA: NORTHERN SUPPORT FOR YAR'ADUA WANING, THOUGH TEMPERED BY FEAR 

SUMMARY: Maitama Sule (strictly protect), former Nigerian ambassador to the United Nations (1979-1983) and confidant of President Umaru Yar'Adua, averred that the northern political elite is increasingly apprehensive about Yar'Adua's health and his capacity to continue to govern, and 

is fearful the North may lose the presidency to the South if Yar'Adua dies, although we note that there are other factors at play on this issue besides Yar'Adua's health, particularly if the Supreme Court calls for a new election.  

While Sule believes that President's performance during his first year in office has suffered due to his ailing health, he assessed Yar'Adua has succeeded in disentangling and distancing himself from former President Obasanjo.  Sule informed that Yar'Adua wants to further reduce Obasanjo's influence both within the Villa and the National Assembly.  Consequently, Sule remarked, Yar'Adua intends to replace current Chief of Staff, and Obasanjo-loyalist, Abdullahi Mohammed.  (Nigerian press reported May 30 that Mohammed has resigned, and will officially vacate office June

2.)Sule confided that some influential northerners are currently pressuring former National Security Adviser, Aliyu Muhammad Gusau, to consider taking over as Chief of Staff.  

Also, Sule alleged that Obasanjo is working to bribe the Supreme Court to overturn President Yar'Adua's April 2007 election.  While claiming 

that First Lady Turai Yar'Adua is heavily involved in corrupt activities, Sule insisted that President Yar'Adua is committed to remaining personally untainted by corruption. 

To that end, Sule asserted, President Yar'Adua recently turned down $60 million, which had been offered to him as the President's personal "share" of Nigeria's monthly oil earnings.  Although Yar'Adua, according to Sule, allegedly ordered his "share" to be deposited into the nation's treasury, Sule also said First Lady Turai pocketed $60 million while Senate President David Mark and House Speaker Dimeji Bankole each pocketed $30 million.  We still contend however, that it is impossible for Yar'Adua not to know about his wife's illicit activity even if he is not personally accepting bribes or engaging in such activity.  END SUMMARY. 

¶2. (S//NF) Maitama Sule (strictly protect), former Nigerian ambassador to the United Nations (1979-1983) and well-known confidant of President Umaru Yar'Adua spoke with PolOff at his Kano residence May 15 (see Ref A for Sule biographical information).  Sule lamented the northern political elite remains increasingly apprehensive about Yar'Adua's health. 

Whereas earlier health-related predictions of Yar'Adua's prognosis had been relatively positive, current estimates, Sule observed, paint a somber picture of the President's strength, and consequently, his capacity to continue to govern.  With the prospect of Yar'Adua's death while still in 

office figuring prominently in the minds of many in the North, Sule remarked that the North fears it may inadvertently forfeit its turn to hold the presidency.  Such an eventuality, Sule bemoaned, would impair the North's ability to retain influence and help chart a more positive course for northerners, especially after eight years of what northerners deem Obasanjo's injurious influence on the North. 

¶3. (S//NF) Sule believes that Yar'Adua has succeeded in distancing himself from Obasanjo, and appears more committed to attenuating Obasanjo's influence within the Villa.  To that end, Sule said, Yar'Adua plans to reshuffle the cabinet to replace Obasanjo-loyalists within the Villa.  In particular, Sule noted that the northern political elite is working to convince former National Security Adviser Aliyu Muhammad Gusau to rebuff entreaties by Ibrahim Babangida to aid him in a return to power, and instead, accede to the position of Yar'Adua's Chief of Staff, which is currently held by Obasanjo-loyalist Abdullahi Mohammed.  (Nigerian press reported May 30 that Mohammed resigned with effect from June 2.  Gbolade Osinowo, Senior Special Assistant to President Yar'Adua will act as Chief of Staff until a replacement is announced.)  


http://m.thenigerianvoice.com/news/69661/1/oil-bonus-gej-gets-200m-as-kickback-monthly.html

Somebody should advise Buhari not to show up that dinner party. Simple. If GMB no show, GEJ won't have who to hand over to.

There used to be a special assistant called Doyin Okupe who made certain promises if certain political party survived...#callmebastard

excellentmomma:
Bombs were dropped here too, what did Boko haram do

D boko haram issue is complicated. It's not a direct fall out of d elections. However d blood shed is acknowledged and shall never be in vain. they are d foundation upon which a new naija will be built. Never again shall naija go down that road. Never again!

So strong! This is a silent revolution. The results from across the country suggests a change in political headwinds. Suddenly, d umbrella is leaking! And the broom has come to sweep out the dirt from d stable.

Other countries had a violent revolution. Blood was shed. Sleep was murdered. Bombs were dropped and governments toppled,albeit illegally.

But not in Naija! We feared d worst a few weeks ago. We knew that as a country we were due for a change. Many feared that the ruling party was not going to give up power soon. And would not do so without a fight.
Alas, we had skirmishes here and there. But not full scale war. But suddenly the wheel is turning. And d broom is sweeping.

Congratulations to you all great Nigerians for chosing the path of peace. Yesterday, we were under an umbrella. Today we have a broom with which to sweep the house clean. Tomorrow, if the broom does not clean well enuf, we may just decide to hear d cock crow. Or chose a hammer to knock things back into shape. Or if it rains,we run back under the umbrella for shelter. The most important thing is, that the votes of Nigerians are beginning count. Be it almajiri or agbero, prostitut@ or professor,bookworm or boko haramist,we are all individually equal to one vote! And d election result is an aggregate of all our votes.

Welcome to the broom world!May d broom era be better than d umbrella's, Amen and Amen!

dotcomnamename:
Chelsea vs QPR, Chelsea wins: 73pts.

Arsenal vs Burnley, Arsenal wins: 66pts.

Chelsea vs Man utd, Man utd wins: 73pts.

Arsenal wouldn't play bcoz of the FA Cup semi: 66pts.

Chelsea vs Arsenal: Arsenal wins, Chelsea 73pts, Arsenal 69pts.

Chelsea vs Leicester, game in hand ends in a draw for Chelsea: 74pts.

Chelsea vs Crystal Palace, Chelsea wins: 77pts.

Arsenal vs Hull city, Arsenal wins: 72pts.

Chelsea vs Liverpool, Chelsea lose: 77pts.

Arsenal vs Swansea, Arsenal wins: 75pts.

Chelsea vs West Brom, Chelsea wins: 80pts.

Arsenal vs Man utd, Arsenal wins: 78pts.

Arsenal vs Sunderland, Arsenal wins their game in hand, goes top with 81pts.

Final day Chelsea vs Sunderland, Chelsea wins: 83pts.

Arsenal vs West Brom, Arsenal wins: 84pts FINAL TABLE standings

Arsenal 84pts--------------Chelsea 83 points

Arsenal can still win the Premier League this season

*alarm rings*
It's time to wake up from dreamland