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When One Partner Cheats, Who Should We Blame? - Family - Nairaland

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Our Teens, Their Dressing, A Moral Decadence, Who Do We Blame? / How Long Does One Need To Know One's Partner? / Should We Blame Ourselves Or Society For Our Actions? (1) (2) (3) (4)

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When One Partner Cheats, Who Should We Blame? by Tgirl4real(f): 10:35pm On Dec 25, 2012
NL has been kinda dry and the holiday is adding to it.

Letz discuss this:

Someone once told me that if his wife cheated on him, he would be convinced, deep in his heart, that he had failed her. Because if she was getting his attention at home, she wouldn't find any reason to step out.

What do you guys think?

1 Like

Re: When One Partner Cheats, Who Should We Blame? by Nobody: 10:43pm On Dec 25, 2012
Hmmm, I can't think right now sha. undecided

But "sharing in the blame" like the man above did is quite a difficult thing to do.
Re: When One Partner Cheats, Who Should We Blame? by Tgirl4real(f): 10:47pm On Dec 25, 2012
Lol @ HQ. Why not comment instead? cheesy
Re: When One Partner Cheats, Who Should We Blame? by Nobody: 10:51pm On Dec 25, 2012
Tgirl4real: Lol @ HQ. Why not comment instead? cheesy

Coming Soon. wink
Re: When One Partner Cheats, Who Should We Blame? by coogar: 11:03pm On Dec 25, 2012
Tgirl4real: NL has been kinda dry and the holiday is adding to it.

Letz discuss this:

Someone once told me that if his wife cheated on him, he would be convinced, deep in his heart, that he had failed her. Because if she was getting his attention at home, she wouldn't find any reason to step out.

What do you guys think?

that someone should be tied to a stake and set ablaze.
if my spouse ever cheats on me then the blame is on her - i am not responsible for her raging hormones or her inability to keep her legs together like a mermaid!

1 Like

Re: When One Partner Cheats, Who Should We Blame? by Nobody: 11:19pm On Dec 25, 2012
Every adult is responsible for their actions, nobody's gonna dump any trash on me saying I made him do it.... nah... you lay your bed you lie on it and you gonna live with the regrets for the rest of your life....period! grin

How's your Christmas going Tee? grin
Re: When One Partner Cheats, Who Should We Blame? by acidosisTM(m): 11:25pm On Dec 25, 2012
When One Partner Cheats, Who Should We Blame?
The answer is simple - DEVIL.


Now I'm not referring to the devil in hell but the devil involved in the act.
Re: When One Partner Cheats, Who Should We Blame? by ifeegee(f): 11:35pm On Dec 25, 2012
Every sane adult is responsible for his/her actions, irrespective of reasons behind such acts.
Re: When One Partner Cheats, Who Should We Blame? by OkikiOluwa1(m): 11:39pm On Dec 25, 2012
You ll blame the cheater & even break his/her head & that of the partner-in-crime with plank.
Re: When One Partner Cheats, Who Should We Blame? by engrtee(f): 12:01am On Dec 26, 2012
When you lead ur brother to sin, who is punishd in hel?

The tempter for leadin a brother to sin

d sinner for not resisting the temptation

op,both are guilty. Two wrong cant make a right

1 Like

Re: When One Partner Cheats, Who Should We Blame? by greatgod2012(f): 12:22am On Dec 26, 2012
He who cheats, remains d cheat and should be blamed, how can someone's else be blamed for another person's lewdness?...noooo, mba, even, God knows dt a cheater cheats because he want to cheat, not because his/her partner deserved to be cheated on.
Besides, if a partner errs, two wrongs can never make a right, it is still not right or acceptable to cheat, doing that means d person has been hiding d devil in him/her and looking for an opportunity to bring it out.
Therefore, he who cheats should be blamed.
Re: When One Partner Cheats, Who Should We Blame? by chamotex(m): 1:40am On Dec 26, 2012
engrtee: When you lead ur brother to sin, who is punishd in hel?

The tempter for leadin a brother to sin

d sinner for not resisting the temptation

op,both are guilty. Two wrong cant make a right

How can both be guilty...so if your partner shags another person, we should blame you?
Wake up!
Re: When One Partner Cheats, Who Should We Blame? by k2039(m): 4:44am On Dec 26, 2012
If I don't deprive her of her birthright(se.x) then she takes the total blame.

But if I deprive her, we both take the blame

2 Likes

Re: When One Partner Cheats, Who Should We Blame? by Tgirl4real(f): 7:59am On Dec 26, 2012
jidegirl12: Every adult is responsible for their actions, nobody's gonna dump any trash on me saying I made him do it.... nah... you lay your bed you lie on it and you gonna live with the regrets for the rest of your life....period! grin

How's your Christmas going Tee? grin

My Christmas was excellento. I had fun. cheesy

I'm sure urs went well as well.

@ topic, what if you denied him of some things, like not being available when needed chasing after money or not giving him peace of mind - nagging him out of his mind? Lol

1 Like

Re: When One Partner Cheats, Who Should We Blame? by Tgirl4real(f): 8:00am On Dec 26, 2012
k2039: If I don't deprive her of her birthright(se.x) then she takes the total blame.

But if I deprive her, we both take the blame

How can that be a birth right? More like conjugal or marital right. cheesy
Re: When One Partner Cheats, Who Should We Blame? by Tgirl4real(f): 8:03am On Dec 26, 2012
coogar:

that someone should be tied to a stake and set ablaze.

if my spouse ever cheats on me then the blame is on her - i am not responsible for her raging hormones or her inability to keep her legs together like a mermaid!

Haba! Set ablaze kwanu? shocked

Kilo le to yen? cheesy
Re: When One Partner Cheats, Who Should We Blame? by k2039(m): 9:51am On Dec 26, 2012
Tgirl4real:

How can that be a birth right? More like conjugal or marital right. cheesy
Don't tell me you take my all my words literally.
Re: When One Partner Cheats, Who Should We Blame? by Tgirl4real(f): 9:55am On Dec 26, 2012
k2039:
Don't tell me you take my all my words literally.

I dey wonder o. Na so u talk say Pope is infallible. cheesy
Re: When One Partner Cheats, Who Should We Blame? by bjcole: 10:02am On Dec 26, 2012
I should be blamed for my patner cheating, na wa o, no be she carry her legs go there, anyway to look at it properly, for a man, whether u give am regularly well o, or u fine well, men go still cheat, sex for a man is like to piss, that is why men can sleep wit maids, harlots etc. For women, u guys attach emotions to it, u just dont cheat 4 no reasons, except some chronis ones.A friend says that if his wife cheats, he will go after d man b'cos he believes u can always sweep a woman off her feet
Re: When One Partner Cheats, Who Should We Blame? by k2039(m): 10:20am On Dec 26, 2012
Tgirl4real:

I dey wonder o. Na so u talk say Pope is infallible. cheesy
That was because you didn't get the joke. en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Papal_infallibility

Seun is the pope of nairaland, he showed he was fallible in presiding over the affairs of nairaland but the pope isn't fallible when it comes to dictating doctrines etc so and I had to put some sarcasm into my post.
Re: When One Partner Cheats, Who Should We Blame? by bjcole: 10:30am On Dec 26, 2012
and in as much as one is responsible for his\her actions, some men ve driven their wives into such acts due to neglects. U women are so emotional & if u dnt get it from home, u can be tempted to look 4 it outside. I ran into a lady recently, d hubby is being living in SA 4 some yrs now, when we became friends, i cud feel dat d lady was really missing something, but 4 me i no want such, so i had 2 relax our closeness. Why wil a man leave his wife here & be leaving in london, body na firewood.

1 Like

Re: When One Partner Cheats, Who Should We Blame? by kpolli(m): 3:23am On Dec 27, 2012
I agree with that husband. . . He shares a blame in it. . . I blame myself too for my failed relationship

1 Like

Re: When One Partner Cheats, Who Should We Blame? by Tgirl4real(f): 11:06am On Dec 27, 2012
kpolli: I agree with that husband. . . He shares a blame in it. . . I blame myself too for my failed relationship

How if I may ask?
Re: When One Partner Cheats, Who Should We Blame? by SAFO(m): 12:06pm On Dec 27, 2012
Tgirl4real: NL has been kinda dry and the holiday is adding to it.

Letz discuss this:

Someone once told me that if his wife cheated on him, he would be convinced, deep in his heart, that he had failed her. Because if she was getting his attention at home, she wouldn't find any reason to step out.

What do you guys think?

This is true to an extent. The husband may have ripened the situation for her to step out but every individual is still responsible for his or her actions.

Although circumstances leading to the lack of attention could be because of a variety of issues not within his control. What if the husband is working 2 or 3 jobs just to maintain a roof over their heads. Should he feel that he failed her then?

Some women are callous enough to believe it's his fault in this scenario. I've seen it plenty of times with some of my wife's friends.

1 Like

Re: When One Partner Cheats, Who Should We Blame? by byvan(f): 1:45pm On Dec 27, 2012
I can never take blame for a partners cheating,every man is responsible for his own actions.
Re: When One Partner Cheats, Who Should We Blame? by kpolli(m): 6:42pm On Dec 27, 2012
Tgirl4real:

How if I may ask?

Cos if he had done his duty, she won't have needed to cheat
Re: When One Partner Cheats, Who Should We Blame? by Tgirl4real(f): 7:47pm On Dec 27, 2012
kpolli:

Cos if he had done his duty, she won't have needed to cheat

But that don't apply in all cases. We see where one partner does all to please his/her spouse and this spouse still ends up cheating.

1 Like

Re: When One Partner Cheats, Who Should We Blame? by chamotex(m): 7:54pm On Dec 27, 2012
kpolli:

Cos if he had done his duty, she won't have needed to cheat

Are you for real?
So we should assume all cheating is caused by the other half not performing his/her duties.
I see...
Re: When One Partner Cheats, Who Should We Blame? by SisiKill1: 7:58pm On Dec 27, 2012
Well this is a tough one oh but let's break it down based of on the stories we have heard.

If a man Cheats, it's the woman's fault because she is missing whatever it is he saw in the other person.

If a woman's cheat, it's the woman's fault because she is not content with what she has.

If a man Cheats, it's the devil's fault since the devil is the woman, it is the woman's fault.

If a woman cheats, it is the devil's fault, since the devil is the woman, it is the woman's fault.

If a man's cheats, it was in a moment of weakness, since it is a wife's duty to pray for her husband's shortcomings therefore it is her fault.

If a man cheats, he was lured into it by the person he cheats with, since more often than not, it is a woman he cheats with then the woman is at fault.

Yeah, it think it is safe to say it is the woman. . .the omnipresence, omniscient, all powerful being who is to blame.

1 Like

Re: When One Partner Cheats, Who Should We Blame? by Nobody: 8:47pm On Dec 27, 2012
Sisi o ! grin grin grin my eyeballs hurts from reading your post! angry
Re: When One Partner Cheats, Who Should We Blame? by kpolli(m): 9:01pm On Dec 27, 2012
Tgirl4real:

But that don't apply in all cases. We see where one partner does all to please his/her spouse and this spouse still ends up cheating.

Then it is obvious he/she wasn't doing the rite thing. . . . I did all my best in my past relationship but she still left, was obvious my game wasn't "tight"
Re: When One Partner Cheats, Who Should We Blame? by kpolli(m): 9:03pm On Dec 27, 2012
chamotex:

Are you for real?
So we should assume all cheating is caused by the other half not performing his/her duties.
I see...

It's not caused by the other half, it's caused by the cheater but the cheated too has a blame in this. . . Simple

When a relationship is great, it's cause of both of them. . . When a relationship fails is caused by only one No I beg to defer, no matter how minute, the cheated has his/her share of the blame. . .

1 Like

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