I know a particular church in Lagos very popular Pastor Who has services midweek morning and the whole place is always filled with people who are supposed to be at their work

dayokanu: I know a particular church in Lagos very popular Pastor Who has services midweek morning and the whole place is always filled with people who are supposed to be at their work

hmmm, Dayo, you and your extreme examples.

baby_123:



hmmm, Dayo, you and your extreme examples.

Anyone who lives in Lagos mainland around Egbeda- Ikotun, Iyana Ipaja would knw this

I think also at Intercontinantal bank sometime back. Prayer every morning is compulsory and certain days of the week Fasting

Lol Baby its not extreme oh. I found out that the one the Lady in my office attends is wednesday 11-1pm.
My friend living in the area told me it is normally packed full with office workers, so Dayo is not ggiving extreme examples oh.

Ok i see there are many bosses and employers here on this thread. But you do agree that employment laws are lacking in Nigeria, especially employment laws for women. Plus how many people truly are forgiven for calling in sick or for emergencies? Granted there should be a limit to the abuse of these privileges but an employer/boss cannot be too rigid considering the human factor. Anyone that takes time out to go for service/business when they are supposed to be at work should lose that job. So that they can concentrate on their pastor fully. Me, i am fighting for better labor laws for my Nigerian sisters. The labor environment for women and mothers is too exploitative and crude.

debrief08: Lol Baby its not extreme oh. I found out that the one the Lady in my office attends is wednesday 11-1pm.
My friend living in the area told me it is normally packed full with office workers, so Dayo is not ggiving extreme examples oh.

Whatever @baby your Nigerian sisters are full of lame excuses and lies so its difficult to believe them when their 'sick call' is real...

jidegirl12: Whatever @baby your Nigerian sisters are full of lame excuses and lies so its difficult to believe them when their 'sick call' is real...

Take off your employer hat and put on your humane, wife and mother hat. How are you so sure they are lying. There is a stipulated time for sick days, if they take it, it is in their contract and they are entitled to full pay. Some people are single mothers of more than 2kids, and these emergencies can come at any time. Sick days are emergencies. No one puts in for sick days 6weeks before. I think the right thing to do is to put them on an unpaid leave if they exhaust their sick time.

Truth be said,if a mother has a time consuming job and the husband also has a worst kind of job the upbringing of the kids are left in the hands of either relatives,nanny or friends.their is no proper way of planning when you fall into such condition.But both parents have to work especially when the husband's income is not on a very high side.and as fpr employing proper nanny where does one get such from? God will help us all cos a wicked person is a wicked person.i got a proper nanny from a know agent when my baby was 2 months old.i wasnt working but i just needed someone to assist.she beats my baby when she refuses to sleep.pls who beats a 2 months old baby .@ debrief to me their is nothing like a proper nanny,someone could just be lucky to get a nice person thats all

I think i know the church its Pastor abi is it pastor Wole Oladiyuns chuch.Not too sure sha cos i know my aunty goes there every wed 11 to 1 but she is not a office worker.

As an aside not everyone can handle it all i.e career and family life so lets not make those who cant feel bad.Heck me sef i cant o.Thats why am going part time.I cant study,do business,work full time,take care of two kids under 5,i also do some volunteering mentoring teenagers with issues(teenage preg,dysfunctional families etc) at a local mission two hrs a week and be a yummy mummy at the same time .I no fit.As someone said the cut in income is perfectly ok for my sanity.And hubby is hands on but he has to work as well and even harder sef.So yeah career has to take a back burner temporarily.We kuku dont want any more kids so its feasible to say maybe in like 4 yrs and by then would even be more qualified.

Mrs mansson: Truth be said,if a mother has a time consuming job and the husband also has a worst kind of job the upbringing of the kids are left in the hands of either relatives,nanny or friends.their is no proper way of planning when you fall into such condition.But both parents have to work especially when the husband's income is not on a very high side.and as fpr employing proper nanny where does one get such from? God will help us all cos a wicked person is a wicked person.i got a proper nanny from a know agent when my baby was 2 months old.i wasnt working but i just needed someone to assist.she beats my baby when she refuses to sleep.pls who beats a 2 months old baby .@ debrief to me their is nothing like a proper nanny,someone could just be lucky to get a nice person thats all

hmmm. This is why running my business is sure while the kiddies are still omo wewe. That nanny will feel like 1 million trailers ran over her. Are you kidding me.

baby_123: Ok i see there are many bosses and employers here on this thread. But you do agree that employment laws are lacking in Nigeria

You have said the main problem going on here. Employers ignoring the main issue and hijacking the thread to discuss all their own pet peeves. Very funny and bogus.

ileobatojo:

You have said the main problem going on here. Employers ignoring the main issue and hijacking the thread to discuss all their own pet peeves. Very funny and bogus.

lol, it is easy to see through all of them. A rich man cannot know how it feels for a poor man to wake up without an idea of what he will eat that day.

baby_123:

Take off your employer hat and put on your humane, wife and mother hat. How are you so sure they are lying. There is a stipulated time for sick days, if they take it, it is in their contract and they are entitled to full pay. Some people are single mothers of more than 2kids, and these emergencies can come at any time. Sick days are emergencies. [b]No one puts in for sick days 6weeks before. [/b]I think the right thing to do is to put them on an unpaid leave if they exhaust their sick time.

^^^I never said that for clarification , I meant vacation time ..... Coverage has to be provided before approval.

As per the lying part; you and I can only guess right? But if its a repeated thing from a specific employee... Well credibility fades when it comes to a certain stage. I have kids too so stop the unnecessary hype!

jidegirl12:

^^^I never said that for clarification , I meant vacation time ..... Coverage has to be provided before approval.

As per the lying part; you and I can only guess right? But if its a repeated thing from a specific employee... Well credibility fades when it comes to a certain stage. I have kids too so stop the unnecessary hype!

Fine, but you admit that you can afford better help and health care for your kids than your employees. Yes or NO? If an employee exhausts their sick time and you tell them that whatever time taken off, they will not be paid and if they take off for a certain time they will be fired. I am sure the employee will have a rethink, and strategize properly the use of those sick days. Lies or not. But to stop them/ penalize them for using approved days off is wrong

baby_123: Ok i see there are many bosses and employers here on this thread. But you do agree that employment laws are lacking in Nigeria, especially employment laws for women. Plus how many people truly are forgiven for calling in sick or for emergencies? Granted there should be a limit to the abuse of these privileges but an employer/boss cannot be too rigid considering the human factor. Anyone that takes time out to go for service/business when they are supposed to be at work should lose that job. So that they can concentrate on their pastor fully. Me, i am fighting for better labor laws for my Nigerian sisters. The labor environment for women and mothers is too exploitative and crude.

Spot on.Its the same world over i.e mothers losing out on career due to motherhood but there should be laws to protect women.Its been a battle here in the Uk and women still make up less than 10% of FTSE 100 CEO.You have to sacrifice at one point no one needs to tell you.But what we are saying is that the Nigerian working enviroment is harsh on employees.Esp women.No one mentioned the blatant s3xual discrumination i highlighted earlier.Believe if i still worked under that man and i called him my child was sick he would have still given me query even if i followed proper channels.Person that made me work till the day of my engagement because he rrfused to give me annual leave of more than 10 days at once(not like i asked for all the 20 at once o just 12 days) and i needed to go for honeymoon as hubby would be coming back to the Uk.I even put it in 5monyhs before my wedding.So i had to work the wednesday before my engagement on thur.My friends were like sebi ur resigning in like a couple of months dont just go what can he do sef?But am just not kind of person.Everyond kept saying is tomorrow not your trad wedding and shaking their heads.It took another unit head to allow me leave at 3pm.

debrief08: Lol @ I should just let people be, I may as well resign and go home. What kind of Manager will I be if I let everybody impose their religion in the work place.
Why can't they serve God and Minister by doing a good job and what they are pid to do? Why must it be through shouting and harrassing other colleagues.

@ Mac, You won't believe what I have been told on this issue. Someone said as a "fellow Christain" I should even be the one leading the fellowship, and I asked them how will they feel if every one that comes in puts his/ her own religion first?
If a Moslem is head that means they will also be partial to them the Christains and if an Aethiest is Head, He/ she too will also totally ban them from any form of worship how will they feel then?
Because I practice one faith doesn't mean I should be partial to people of my faith.

BJ Cole, If you earn money pay a Nanny proper Nanny to watch your kids, these days we have Graduates who take the Job and believe me your kids are in very good hands.
Like I said all my 7 other sisters have families and careers and not one is slacking in addition to other hard working women.


"Let people be" has destroyed the Nigerian System. It will not be said of me that I joined hands to destroy Nigeria and my small place. If you want to be religious do so on your own time not on time you are being paid to effectively use.
When you have your own company and you are struggling with Bank loans to keep it profitable you too "let people be" ehnnn.

LOL! I can truly see why you got a promotion. You are practising the things a Manager is trained to do and you understand what business management is all about.

jidegirl12: I'm exhausted ..... Didn't get enough sleep last night cos the baby's teething( honestly I don't know what's wrong with her) .... but work dey ..... no calling in sick irrelevantly .... I could , but no... not life threatening and he'll take her in after hours. See?

lol,but you know no two individuals can be same.just the way mr A and B respond differiently to malaria.so if another mum called in sick because her baby was teething,Na she sabi.its her sick days that would be exhausted.you are a strong mother.thumbs up but other people that cant be like you shouldnt feel cheated.am just speaking generally not defending myself cos i dont even work for now until my baby starts pre school in april.

damiso:

Spot on.Its the same world over i.e mothers losing out on career due to motherhood but there should be laws to protect women.Its been a battle here in the Uk and women still make up less than 10% of FTSE 100 CEO.You have to sacrifice at one point no one needs to tell you.But what we are saying is that the Nigerian working enviroment is harsh on employees.Esp women.No one mentioned the blatant s3xual discrumination i highlighted earlier.Believe if i still worked under that man and i called him my child was sick he would have still given me query even if i followed proper channels.Person that made me work till the day of my engagement because he rrfused to give me annual leave of more than 10 days at once(not like i asked for all the 20 at once o just 12 days) and i needed to go for honeymoon as hubby would be coming back to the Uk.I even put it in 5monyhs before my wedding.So i had to work the wednesday before my engagement on thur.My friends were like sebi ur resigning in like a couple of months dont just go what can he do sef?But am just not kind of person.Everyond kept saying is tomorrow not your trad wedding and shaking their heads.It took another unit head to allow me leave at 3pm.

You should have quit. What difference will two month salary make? Besides he would have only queried you. What is the worst that could happen? He will not give you a good reference? Will you even need it in the UK sef? Men, see enduring. I really detest the sexual abuse part either by boss or lecturer. Our female law makers are just too shameless. I taya.

baby_123:

Fine, but you admit that you can afford better help and health care for your kids than your employees. Yes or NO? If an employee exhausts their sick time and you tell them that whatever time taken off, they will not be paid and if they take off for a certain time they will be fired. I am sure the employee will have a rethink, and strategize properly the use of those sick days. Lies or not. But to stop them/ penalize them for using approved days off is wrong

Yes and I don't see why they can't either.

Second of all, I don't get to tell them whatever time they need to take off... It's always inked on their pay-stubs...

However if sick time is exhausted, they can take time off but an employee with exhausted sick time is bad news... except extreme situations the management is aware of like aged mother, sickle cell child, bed bound spouse ....then my humane hat is glued to my head on that.

Also ,if they need to use their vaca time, request has to be placed and HR informs the managers then to their co-ordinators ,then to me .... managers will find a coverage before its approved..... If its handed in 6weeks prior then it's no brainer it gets approved right away...you don't expect me to approve vaca off 2days before it starts....it's a no no! and shows the employee doesn't care, a responsible employee will follow the procedure.

I'm done with this back and forth.

baby_123:

You should have quit. What difference will two month salary make? Besides he would have only queried you. What is the worst that could happen? He will not give you a good reference? Will you even need it in the UK sef? Men, see enduring. I really detest the sexual abuse part either by boss or lecturer. Our female law makers are just too shameless. I taya.

I dont know o.I can like to be efiko at times .I always want to do things officially.Hubby sef was like resign jo you might not even the reference.But i was like what if my spouse visa takes longer(and it did) will i now be sitting at home for 3 months.Also i wanted to so lenu(for the non yorubas means kinda give him a bad name ).Most people knew the next day was trad wedding so i kept getting iyawo what are you doing here.Are you not meant to be on leave?And then i would be like its Mr..... that did not approve it o.People were then like why is this man always on your case? It took another unit head and another friend in HR who told me i should just leave at 3.My dad and hubby were mad cos that was the first time they heard of the issue i was having with the man.

nigerian women and their wahala.
when you ask them to stay at home and be a housewife, they protest and scream gender equality/sex discrimination. when you let them work, they take out several days off work due to maternity and child rearing issues. talk of eating one's cake and trying to eat it. any woman who wants to embrace her career 100% should forget about raising kids and if you want to raise kids, leave your career out of the matter temporarily.

damiso:


I dont know o.I can like to be efiko at times .I always want to do things officially.Hubby sef was like resign jo you might not even the reference.But i was like what if my spouse visa takes longer(and it did) will i now be sitting at home for 3 months.Also i wanted to so lenu(for the non yorubas means kinda give him a bad name ).Most people knew the next day was trad wedding so i kept getting iyawo what are you doing here.Are you not meant to be on leave?And then i would be like its Mr..... that did not approve it o.People were then like why is this man always on your case? It took another unit head and another friend in HR who told me i should just leave at 3.My dad and hubby were mad cos that was the first time they heard of the issue i was having with the man.

. Some people sha. They like to take authority to the next level. What wickedness. Some people would have shown the guy bebe in those last few months. . I would still like to know if you needed the reference after all the wahala.

baby_123:

. Some people sha. They like to take authority to the next level. What wickedness. Some people would have shown the guy bebe in those last few months. . I would still like to know if you needed the reference after all the wahala.

You know what in retrospect i should have just resigned cos i did not need the refrence.They normally contact whoever no you give and i used my padi who was then deputy head of HR who was one of the people that was impressed with me at my interview.But i had already made everybody know that there was more to this issue than meets the eye and alot of people were so disappointed in him.Back then was when GSM was rolling out so they launched in one faaaar northern city and made him regional head.Heard he hated the transfer and resigned.Aint Karma swell .But that man showed me.This thread just made me let loose .

Dis is interesting. However, what is d hubby doing when d woman is trying to balance career and family?

bukatyne: Dis is interesting. However, what is d hubby doing when d woman is trying to balance career and family?

this thread affect men too, since they are also involved in both family and career, but d consensus here is that.......women sacrifice more to family while men concentrate more on career, leaving d women at d forefront of family, which makes employers of labour frown at women more on their field of career.

Sincerely, i must admit that i have learnt alot through this thread, and that i dont regret opening the thread, its full of experiences and knowledge. Those who are about to start a family and at d same time pursue their career will find this thread useful. I therefore say a very big thank you to everyone who is contributory to this thread. May God bless you all.

bukatyne: Dis is interesting. However, what is d hubby doing when d woman is trying to balance career and family?

i guess he is busy doing domestic chores & baby siting, abi or is it not what u 21st generation ladies want, new generation dadies according to what my sister is preaching. More grease to ur elbow debrief & jidegirl, powerful women of purpose or what shd i call u, that is why to work under a woman, e get as e be. God help us.

Greatgod, i hope u r not trying 2 end this, we ve just scratch d surface, there r plenty to still discuss. Debrief said proper nanny or educated nanny, which one is proper nanny? i dont knw, i thought i saw a pic of a guy putting his pp in d mouth of a girl of abt 6mths old, d girl sucked it dry, i dnt knw if some of u saw it, God help our new generation mothers. Now Op i also want 2 add this; how r u ladies(married) coping with sexual desires 4rm ur bosses? b'cos its also affect family too.

bjcole: Greatgod, i hope u r not trying 2 end this, we ve just scratch d surface, there r plenty to still discuss. Debrief said proper nanny or educated nanny, which one is proper nanny? i dont knw, i thought i saw a pic of a guy putting his pp in d mouth of a girl of abt 6mths old, d girl sucked it dry, i dnt knw if some of u saw it, God help our new generation mothers. Now Op i also want 2 add this; how r u ladies(married) coping with sexual desires 4rm ur bosses? b'cos its also affect family too.

my thoughts exactly.graduate or not it doesnt make a wicked person less of a devil.

I sincerely think Nigeria has not reached that at manager's discretion stage. Let everything be documented very well in contracts, stipulated well in terms and conditions so manager is not perceived as evil and employee does not feel hard done by.

However, most organisations I know have Leave with pay arrangement for your child being sick ( I think couple of weeks per financial year), compassionate leave (also leave with pay) for a couple of weeks per financial year. A year Mat leave (fully and partially paid)

Everything else happening in your personal life is at your manager's discretion.

Back to topic

"Ideal" family life in which mummy and daddy picks up junior and his siblings from school at close of play is almost impossible if both of you are not self-employed. One tends to suffer for another. You cannot have it all. It is just almost impossible. You just have to find a healthy balance for both with your conscience clean at the end of the day.

Mrs mansson:
my thoughts exactly.graduate or not it doesnt make a wicked person less of a devil.

what has graduate got to do with being a gud person, there is nobody u can trust, one is just leaving d kids @ d mercy of who may take advantage of them. My brother & his wife usually leave house around 5;30am, they drop d baby @ dat time too & come home around 8pm, is that not madness, i thought by now, they wud ve made millions. Why wudnt u want to sacrifice 4 ur children?

bjcole: Greatgod, i hope u r not trying 2 end this, we ve just scratch d surface, there r plenty to still discuss. Debrief said proper nanny or educated nanny, which one is proper nanny? i dont knw, i thought i saw a pic of a guy putting his pp in d mouth of a girl of abt 6mths old, d girl sucked it dry, i dnt knw if some of u saw it, God help our new generation mothers. Now Op i also want 2 add this; how r u ladies(married) coping with sexual desires 4rm ur bosses? b'cos its also affect family too.

end wetin ke? We are just starting, this is a topic that is going to last for a long time, considering how these two important aspects of life clashes with each other.
Now, as regards nanny or maids, if you read d thread frm d very beginning, i did mention it there, how both dad and mum leaves d destiny of their kids into d hand and care of maids, to d extent that, d kids harldy recognise their true parents, thinking that d maids are their real parents. Hey! , may God help us , its scaring, to be thinking what may likely be happening btw them, unless, one is so lucky to have good ones, that is why, according to many posters on dis thread, it is a general concensus that one of d parents have to take it easy in order to fill d vacuum of family, which, most of d time, its d wife, and d hubby tends towards d career development, all in a bid to balance up.
May God help us all.
As regards sexual desires from d boss, that depends on d person involved maturity and decision. I, for one, can go to any lenght to deal with any boss that will try that with me. As for my family sha, its d first ever.