Assalamualaykum, i am sure some people will be getting maried by next Saturday, so i decided to paste dis material i found. It's very rich and interesting. Hope we learn one or two things from it.

The Etiquettes Of Marriage And
Wedding by Muhammad Nâsir ad-Dîn al-Albânî

The following are those etiquettes:
1. Kindness toward your wife when you wish to
enter into her.
It is desirable, when one goes into his wife on his wedding night, to show her kindness, such as presenting her with something to drink, etc. This is found in the hadîth narrated by Asmâ' bint Yazid
ibn As-Sakan who said: "I beautified 'As'ishah for Allâh's Messenger, then
called him to come to see her unveiled. He came, sat next to her, and brought a large cup of milk from which he drank. Then, he offered it to 'ﺁ'ishah, but
she lowered her head and felt shy. I scolded her
and said to her: "Take from the hand of the Prophet." She then took it and drank some. Then,
the Prophet said to her, "Give some to your
companion." At that point, I said: "O Messenger of
Allâh, rather take it yourself and drink, and then
give it to me from your hand." He took it, drank
some, and then offered it to me. I sat down and put it on my kness. Then, I began rotating it and
following it with my lips in order that I might hit the
spot from which the Prophet had drunk. Then, the
Prophet said about some women who were there
with me: "Give them some." But, they said: "We
don't want it." (ie. we are not hungry). The Prophet said: "Do not combine hunger and
fibbing!" [Ahmad and al-Humaidi. Ahmad reports it
with 2 isnâds - one of which supports the other,
and it is supported...]"

2. Placing your hands on your wife's head and praying for her. The husband should, at the time of consummating the marriage with his wife or before that, place his hand on the front part of her head, mention the name of Allâh Most High, and pray for Allâh's blessings. As in the statement of the Prophet: "When any of you marries a woman ... he should hold her forelock, mention Allâh Most High, and pray for His blessings saying: "O Allâh, I ask You for the good in her and the good with which You have created her, and I seek refuge in You from the evil in her and the evil with which You have created her." {Allâhumma innî as'aluka min khairiha wa
khairi mâ jabaltaha 'alaihi wa a'ûdhubika min
sharriha wa sharri mâ jabaltaha 'alaihi} [Abû Dawûd and others. Al-Bukhari in "Af'âlul-'Ibâd", Abû Dawûd, Ibn Majah, al-Hâkim, al-Baihaqî and Abû Ya'lâ with hasan isnâd ...]

3. The praying of husband and wife together It is desirable for the husband and wife to pray 2 rakât together on their wedding night. This has been narrated from the earliest generation of
Muslims,

"A man named Abu Harîz came and said: 'I have
married a young girl, and I am afraid that she will
despise me.' 'Abdullah ibn Mas'ûd said to him:
"Verily, closeness is from Allâh, and hatred is from
Shaitân, who wishes to make despicable that which
Allâh has allowed. So, when your wife comes to you, tell her to pray behind you 2 rakât.'" In
another version of the same story, "'Abdullah went
on to say: 'And say: 'O Allâh give Your blessings on
me in my wife, and to her in me. O Allâh join us
together as long as You join us in good, and split us
apart if You send to us that which is better.'" [Ibn Abi Shaibah and at-Tabarâni and 'Abdur-Razzâq:
Sahîh].

4. What to say at the time of making Love. When a Muslim man is about to enter his wife, he should always say first: Bismillahi, Allâhumma jannibnâ ash-shaitân, wa
jannib ash-shaitân mâ razaqtanna [In the name of Allâh, O Allâh, keep us away from the devil, and keep the devil away from that which You may grant us (ie. offspring).] About this, the Prophet said:
"After that, if Allâh decrees that they will have a child, the devil will never be able to harm that child". [al-Bukharî]

5. How he should come to her. It is allowed for a Muslim man to enter his wife in
her va.gina from any direction he wishes - from behind or from the front. About this Allâh revealed the following verse: "Your wives are a tilth unto you; so approach
your tilth when or how ye will" [al-Baqarah
2:223]. On the authority of Jâbir who said: "The Jews used to say that if a man entered his wife in the va.gina but from behind, their child would be cross-eyed! Then Allâh revealed the verse: "Your wives are as a tilth unto you; so approach your tilth
when or how ye will;" [al-Baqarah 2:223]. The Prophet said : "From the front or the back, as long as it is in the vagi.na". [Al-Bukharî and Muslim]

6. The Prohibition of Sodomy. It is forbidden for a Muslim man to enter his wife in
her anus. There are
hadîths on the subject, among them: a.. First: On the authority of Umm Salama who said: "When the Muhajirîn came to Ansâr at al-Madînah, some of them married women from the Ansâr. The women of the Muhajirîn used to lie on their faces (during intercourse), while the women of the Ansâr never did it that way. Then, one of the men of the
Muhajirîn wanted his wife to do that. She refused until such time as she could ask the Prophet about it. She went to the Prophet but was embarassed to ask the question, adn so Umm Salama asked him.
Then the verse was revealed which says: "Your
wives are as a tilth unto you; so approach your tilth
when or how ye will;" [al-Baqarah 2:223]. The Prophet> said: "No! (not any way you wish) Except in one opening! (ie. the va.gina)". [Ahmad, at-
Tirmidhî and others : Sahîh]

7. Making Wudhû’ between 2 acts with one's wife. When a Muslim man has had sexual intercourse
with his wife in the legal manner and then wishes
to return another time, he should first perform
wudhû’, based on the statement of the Prophet : "When one of you comes to his wife and then
wishes to return another time, let him perform
wudhû’ between the 2 times (In another version,
the same wudhû’ which he performs for prayer) for
verily, it will invigorate his return."[Muslim, Ibn Abi
Shaibah and others].

8. Bathing, however, is preferable to merely making
wudhû’ in such situations. Abu Râfi' narrates: "That
the Prophet made the rounds of all his wives one
night, bathing in the house of each one. He (i.e. the
narrator) asked the Prophet: "Couldn't you have just bathed once (i.e. at the
end)? The Prophet answered : "This way is purer,
cleaner and better". [Abû Dâwûd, an-Nasâ'î: Hasan
in "al-'Ishrah", and others].

9. The Bathing of Husband and Wife together. It is permissible for the husband and wife to bath together in the same place even though he sees her private parts, and she sees his. This is established by a number of authentic hadîth , among them: 1.. On the authority of 'ﺁ'ishah (radiAllâhu anha)
who said: "I used to bathe with the Prophet from a single container of water which was placed between us such that our hands collided inside it. He used to race me such that I would say: `Leave some for me, leave some for me!' She added: `We were in a state
of Janaba (i.e. the state of having slept together).'"[Al-Bukharî and Muslim]. 2.. On the authority of Mu'âwiya ibn Haida, who
said: "I said: `O Messenger of Allâh, which of our unclothedness is allowed, and of which must we beware?' The Prophet answered, "Guard your unclothedness except from your wife or those whom your right hand possesses." (So it is permissible for both spouses to look at and touch the body of his or her companion even the private parts). He said:
`O Messenger of Allâh, what about if the relatives live together with each other?' The Prophet answered : "If you can make sure that no one ever sees your unclothedness, then do so." He said: `O
Messenger of Allâh, what about when one is alone?' The Prophet said: "Allâh is more deserving of your modesty than are the people"."[Ahmad, Abu Dawûd, at-Tirmidhî and others: Sahîh].

10. Making Wudhû’ after Se.x and before Sleeping It is best for husband and wife not to sleep after having se.x until they first perform wudhû'. There are various hadîth about this, among them: a.. First: On the authority of 'ﺁ'shah who said: "Whenever the Prophet wished to sleep or eat
while in a state of Janaba (i.e. after having se.x and before bathing), he would wash his private parts and perform wudhû’ as for prayer." [Al-Bukhârî
and Muslim]. b.. Second: On the authority of Ibn 'Umar who said: "O Messenger of Allâh, should we go to sleep in a
state of janaba?" The Prophet answered: "Yes, after
making wudhuu." [Al-Bukhârî and Muslim]. In
another version: "Perform wudhû’ and wash your
private parts, and then sleep." [Al-Bukhârî and
Muslim]. And, in another version: "Yes, you can perform wudhû’, sleep, and bathe whenever you
want." [Muslim and al-Baihaqi]. And, in still another
version: "Yes, and perform wudhû’ if you
wish." (This last version proves that this wudhû’ is
not obligatory.) [Ibn Khuzima and Ibn Hibban:
Sahîh].

Very detailed and insightful stuff.

11.The Ruling of this Wudhû’ This wudhû’ is not obligatory, but is very highly
and definitely commendable. This (i.e. its not being
obligatory) is based on the hadîth narrated by
'Umar in which he asked the Prophet: "Should we
go to sleep in a state of janaba?" To which the
Prophet answered: "Yes, and perform wudhû’ if you wish." [Ibn Hibbân: Sahîh]. This is also supported by other hadîth , among them a hadîth
narrated by 'ﺁ'ishah who said: "The Prophet used to
sleep in a state of janaba without having touched
water, until he would get up later and bathe." [Ibn
Abi Shaiba, at-Tirmidhî, Abu Dâwûd and others:
Sahîh].

12. Making Tayammum in a state of Janaba instead of Wudhû’. It is also permissible to make Tayammum sometimes instead of wudhû’ before sleeping. This is based on a hadîth of 'ﺁ'ishah in which she said: " When the Prophet was in a state of janaba and
wished to sleep, he used to make wudhû’ or
Tayammum." [Al-Baihaqi: Hasan].

Bathing before Sleeping is Perferable Bathing however, is perferable to any of the above-
mentioned possibilities as is clear in the hadîth of `Abullâh ibn Qais who said: "I asked 'Ai'ishah : "What did the Prophet do when in a state of janaba? Did he bathe before sleeping or sleep before bathing?" She answered: "He did all of those
things. Sometimes he bathe and then slept. And sometimes he performed wudhû’ and then slept." I
said: "Praise be to Allâh who made things flexible."[Muslim, Ahmad and Abu `Auwâna].

13. The Prohibition of sex when She is Menstruating. It is forbidden for a Muslim man to have sexual
intercourse with his wife when she is menstruating.
This is clear in the following verse of the Qur'ân: "They ask thee concerning women's courses.
Say: They are a hurt and a pollution: So keep
away from women in their courses, and do not approach them until they are clean. But when they have purified themselves, ye may
approach them in any manner, time, or place ordained for you by Allâh. For Allâh loves those who turn to Him constantly and He loves those who keep themselves pure and clean." [Al- Baqarah, 2:222

maclatunji: Very detailed and insightful stuff.

I think so too. I hope it's useful. Thanks

14. The Penitence of One who Has Sex during
Menses. Whoever is overcome by desire and has sexual
intercourse with his wife when she is menstruating
and before she becomes clean must give the value
of one dinar's weight of gold or about 4.25 grams
(4.2315 to be more precise), or half that amount.
This is based on a hadîth narrated by 'Abdullâh ibn 'Abbâs from the Prophet in relation to one who
enters his wife while she is on her period as
follows: "Let him give one dinar in charity, or one half
dinar." [At-Tirmidhî, Abu Dawûd, At-Tabarâni and
others: Sahîh].

15. What is Permissible when She is on her Periods. It is allowed for him to enjoy pleasure with his wife
in any way except for her private parts when she is on her period. There are several hadîth s about this: First: "and do everything except intercourse itself." [Muslim, Abu 'Auwâna and Abû Dâwûd] Second: On the authority of 'ﺁ'ishah who said: "When we were on our periods, the Prophet used to order us to put on a waist cloth that her husband can then lie with her." One time she said: "... her husband can then handle and caress her." [al- Bukhârî, Muslims and others]. Third: On the authority of one of the wives of the Prophet who said: "When the Prophet wanted something from one of
his wives who was on her period, he put a cloth
over her private parts, and then did whatever he
wanted." [Abo Dâwûd: Sahîh]

When is it Allowed to resume Sexual Activity
after Menses? When she becomes clean of any menstrual blood, and the flow stops completely, it is allowed for them
to resume sexual activity after she washes the place where the blood had been, or performs wudhû’, or
takes a complete bath. Whichever of these three alternatives she does makes it allowed for them to resume sexual activity, based on Allâh's statement
in the Qur’ân: "But when they have purified themselves, ye
may approach them in any manner, time, or
place ordained for you by Allâh. For Allâh loves those who turn to Him constantly and He loves those who keep themselves pure and clean." [Al-Baqarah 2:222]

good point raised.

16. The Lawfulness of Coi.tus Interruptus (Withdrawl of the pe.nis from the vagi.na at the time of ejaculation with the purpose of avoiding impregnation. This can be done only with the permission of one's wife). It is allowed for a Muslim man to practise coi.tus
interruptus with his wife. There are several hadîth about this: First On the authority of Jâbir who said: "We were
practising coi.tus interruptus, and the Qur’ân was being revealed." [al-Bukhârî and Muslim]. In another version, he sa: "We used to practise coi.tus interruptus in the lifetime of the Prophet. This reached the Prophet, and he did not prohibit us from doing it." id [Muslim, an-Nasâ'î and at-
Tirmidhî].
some others say

It is Preferrable not to Practice Coit.us
Interruptus. Not practising coi.tus interruptus is preferable for a
number of reasons: First: It is harmful for the woman, since it reduces
her pleasure by cutting it short. If she agrees to it, it
still contains the following negetive points. Second: It negates part of the purpose of marriage
which is enlarging the Muslim nation through
offspring, as in the statement of the Prophet: "Marry the loving and fertile, for I will compete with the
other Prophets with the number of my followers." [Abu Dawûd, an-Nasâ'î and others: Sahîh]. This is
why the Prophet once referred to it as "minor
infanticide" (and not because it is forbidden as
infanticide is forbidden) when asked about it
saying: "That is minor infanticide". [Muslim, Ahmad
and al-Baihaqi]. For this was preferable in the hadîth narrated by Abu Sa'îd al-Khudhriy saying:
"Coitus Interruptus was mentioned in the presence
of the Prophet and he said: "Why would one of you do that? (note he did not say "let none of you do
that" Allâh is the Creator of every single soul." [Muslim]. In another version, he said: "You act and you act. There are no people destined to be from
now until the day of Qiyama but that all of them will
be." [Muslim]

17. What the two Spouses should Intend with their
Marriage. Both spouses should enter into marriage with the
following intentions: freeing themselves of
unfulfilled sexual desires, and protecting
themselves from falling into that which Allâh has forbidden (i.e. adultery and fornication). What's more, a reward as the reward for sadaqa (voluntary giving of charity) is recorded for them
every time they have sex. This is based on the following hadîth of the Prohpet narrated by Abu Dharr: "Some of the companions of the Prophet said to
him: 'O Messenger of Allâh, the affluent among us
have taken the rewards (of the hereafter)! They pray as we pray, fast as we fast, and then they give charity from the surplus of their wealth!" The Prophet said: "Did Allâh not make for you that from which you can give sadaqa? Verily for every time
you say SubhannAllâh (Exalted is Allâh) there is a
sadaqa, and for every time you say Allâhuakbar
(Allâh is Most Great) there is a sadaqa, and for every
time you say Al-Hamdulillah (Praise is to Allâh)
there is sadaqa, and in every act of enjoining what is right there is sadaqa, and in every act of
forbidding what is wrong there is a sadaqa, and in
your sexual relations there is a sadaqa." The
Companions said: "O Messenger of Allâh , is there a
reward for one of us when he satisfies his sexual
desire?" The Prophet said: "Don't you see, if he had satisfied it with the forbidden, would there not have
been a sin upon him?" They said: "Why, yes! He
said: "In the same way, when he satisfies it with
that which is lawful, there is for him in that a
reward." [Muslim, an-Nasâ'î in al-'Ishrah, and
Ahamd].

18.What he should do the Morning After His
Wedding Night. It is desireable for the husband to go to his relatives
who came to visit him in his house, on the following
morning, to give them greetings and pray for them.
It is also desireable for them to do likewise for him,
as in the following hadîth narrated by Anas : "The Messenger of Allâh gave a feast on the
morning of his wedding night with Zainab, at which
he fed the Muslims to satisfaction on bread and
meat. Then, he went out to the Mothers of the
Believers (i.e. to his other wives), gave them
greetings and prayed for them, which they returned in kind. This is the way he used to do on
the morning after a wedding night." [Ibn Sa'd and
an-Nasâ'î: Sahîh].

olawalebabs: good point raised.

Thanks.

19. The House must have a Place for Bathing. The married couple must have a place to bathe in
their house, and the husband must not allow his
wife to go to the public bath houses. This is
forbidden, and there are various hadîth about it,
among them: First: On the authority of Jâbir who said: "The Prophet said: "Whoever believes in Allâh and
the Last Day, let him not allow his wife to go to the
Public baths. Whoever believes in Allâh and the Last
Day, let him not go to the baths except with a waist-
cloth. And whoever believes in Allâh and the Last
Day, let him never sit at a table at which intoxicants are being circulated." [Al-Hâkim, at-Tirmidhî and
others: Sahîh] Second: On the authority of Umm ad-Dardâ' who
said: "I came out of the public bath and I met Allâh's
Messenger who said to me: 'From where have you
come O Umm Dardâ'?' I said: 'From the baths'. Then
he said: "By the One in whose hand is my soul,
every woman who removes her clothes anywhere
except the house of one of her mothers has torn down all that veils her before ar-
Rahman." [Ahmad : Sahîh] Third: On the authority of Abu al-Malîh who said: "Some women from Ash-Shâm entered upon
'ﺁ'ishah and said: "Where are you from?" The
women answered: "We are of the people of Ash-
Shâm (the area of present-day Syria)." 'ﺁ'ishah said:
"Are you perhaps from that district which allows its
women to enter the public baths?" The said: "Yes". She said: "As for me, I heard the Messenger of Allâh
say: "Every woman who removes her clothes other
than in her house has torn down all veils of
modesty between herself and Allâh." [at-Tirmidhî,
Abu Dawûd and others: Sahîh]

20. The Prohibition of Spreading Bedroom Secrets. It is forbidden for either the husband or the wife to
spread any of the secrets of their bedroom to
anyone outside. The following two hadîth are
about this: First: "Verily among the worst people before Allâh on the
Day of Judgement is a man who approaches his
wife sexually and she responds and then he
spreads her secrets." [Muslim, Ibn Abi Shaiba,
Ahmad and others]. Second: "On the authority of Asmâ bint Yazid who
narrated "that she was once in the presence of the
Prophet and there were both men and women
sitting. The Prophet then said: "Perhaps a man might discuss what he does with
his wife, or perhaps a woman might inform
someone what she did with her husband?" The
people were silent. Then I said: "O, Yes! O
Messenger of Allâh verily both the women and men
do that." Then the Prophet said: "Do not do that. It is like a male shaitân who meets a female shaitân
along the way, and has sex with her while the
people look on!" [Ahmad: Hasan or Sahîh due to
supports]

21. The Obligation of a Wedding Feast. The husband must sponsor a feast after the
consummation of the marriage. This is based on the order of the Prophet to 'Abur-Rahman ibn 'Auf to do so, and on the hadîth narrated by Buraida ibn
At-Hasîb, who said: "When 'Ali sought the hand of Fâtimah (the Prophet's daughter) in marraige, he said that the Prophet said: "A wedding (and in another version "a bridegroom" must have a
feast."The narrator said: "Sa'ad said: '(a feast) of a sheep. ' Someone else said: 'Of such and such a
quantity of corn." [Ahmad and at-Tabarâni: Its isnâd is acceptable as al-Hâfiz Ibn Hajr says in Fathul-Bârî: 9/188] The Sunnah of the Wedding Feast The following should be observed with regard to
the wedding banquet: First: It should be held ('aqb - Fathul Bârî:
9/242-244) three days after the first wedding night, since this is the tradition of the Prophet which has reached us. On the authority of Anas who said: "The Prophet entered upon his wife and sent me to
invite some men for food." [al-Bukhârî and al- Baihaqi]. Also on the authority of Anas he said: "I never saw the Prophet sponsor such a wedding
feast as the one he gave for Zainab. He slaughtered
a sheep and fed everyone meat and bread until they ate no more." [Al-Bukhârî, Muslim and others].

Wedding Feasts can be Other than Meat. It is allowed to give the wedding banquet with any
food which is available and affordable, even if that does not include meat. This is based on the
following hadîth narrated by Anas: "The Prophet stayed between Khaibar and al-
Madînah for three days during which he had
entered with his wife Safiya . Then I invited the
Muslims to his Wedding feast. There was neither
meat nor bread at his feast. Rather, leather eating mats were brought out and on them were placed dates, dried milk, and clarified butter. The people
ate their fill." [Al-Bukhârî, Muslim and others]. Participation of the Wealthy in the Feast with
their Wealth It is commendable for the wealthy to help in the
preparations for the wedding feast based on the
hadîth narrated by Anas about the Prophet's
marriage to Safiya: "Then, when we were on the road, Umm Sulaim
prepared her (Safiya) for him (the Prophet and
brought her to him at night, and so the the Prophet
awoke the next morning a new bridgegroom.
Then he said: "Whoever has something, let him
bring it." (In another version, he said "Whoever has an excess of provisions, let him bring it." Anas
continues: "And so the leather eating mats were
spread out and one man would bring dried milk,
another dates and another clarified butter and so
they made Hais (hais is a mixture of the above three
things). The people then ate of this hais and drank from pools of rainwater which were nearby, and
that was the wedding feast of the Prophet." [Al-
Bukhârî, Muslims and others].

Source:
www.islaam.net/main/display.php?part=full&category=116&id=891

I am sure there are some reservations about some of the points. Please, let's discuss them. Jazakumullahu khairan.

Well done @Rukemi

zayhal: Well done @Rukemi

Thank you Zayhal

Subhanallah jazakillahu khayran that all I can say OP

JazakAllahu Khayran

emcemayo: Subhanallah jazakillahu khayran that all I can say OP

tbaba1234: JazakAllahu Khayran

Wayakum

I have little knowledge of islam. So i didn't undertand some parts of the article. But i have two friends here,on nairaland, who practice it,maybe i will learn from them.

My question is wont these rituals around sex make it too cumbersome?