Sapphire86: Abeggi make I hear word with ur pathetic title. How does it apply 2 women? Shdnt it ve bn 'why can't she say I'm sorry?'

Were you told that pride is only found in women? Dt let me 4get abt ur heartbreak and lash u properly.

Or u don't think that maybe she feels you are d 1 2 apologise 2 her as well?
Dey dere and allow pride turn u 2 a divorcee!

Nonsense! U wld rather wait 4 I'm sorry than fight 4 ur marriage @ least 4 ur kids sake. Hisssssssss

True NaijaBwoy:

@Sapphire86

Its a simplistic response from you.

I dont think theres a person alive who ever wants to go through a divorce and i dont think theres anyone alive who wants to stay unhappy in a marriage. Im guessing your not married otherwise you wouldnt trivialise such things as respect between the hubby and the missus. least of all 3rd party intrusions.

My dear, for the future pride is mutual between the couple but its best exhibited outside not within your marriage. i have aplogised severely even though she was wrong,,,,,,,,,,but it has become more dangerous for the future when i consider she doesnt acknowledge she is wrong by offering a mutual apology,,,, at this point what will you say if only one party offers an apology? most of us naija will say, u no get liver?

You may be content saying fight for your marriage for your kids sake, however, youd be lying to yourself, making yourself unhappy as you literaly watch as you get turned to a door mat and your dignity trodded as your self respect is turned to putty...... if your not happy, how can you be happy for your kids.... kids have a 3rd sense and will always recognise an unhappy parent.... I hope you never experience this... this is not a wake up one morning decision,,,, it years of coping, hoping, patching and schooling

where do you draw the line?

carefreewannabe: Well, I know how to say sorry and I'm a woman but I only do if I think that I was wrong. Nobody can force me to say sorry unless I don't see where I went wrong. So tell us what you want your wife to apologize for and maybe someone will come up with a good piece of advice.

True NaijaBwoy:

Haba! we, ve only just started.... I'll let you all into my mindset in good time!

All i'll hint is this!.... Would you as a married woman go 100% against your husbands instruction simply because you have your family backing?

oyinbogirl: wow na wa o for you , sorry for your situation, sounds so painful for you. Clearly you are feeling you've reached the end of the road here & at a really low point. I wonder why it is that some find it easier to say sorry than others? ( Ive gotten advice to say sorry even if i hadnt done the wrong to keep peace )That said its a pride thingy....but i do wish she can say the sorry to keep her family and home together since you are willing even now which is really commendable. How does she take the news of a divorce? tell us what she thinks, whether she accepts it or wants to fight for it....i find this a sad story, and its a warning to us all as to were pride can get us in the end . I pray you keep strong whatever happens

True NaijaBwoy:

Im a poker player (not the gambling, addicted type!). and i know how hard to push a bluff. The general rules are, you fold if you have a bad hand or you loose big. In my real life situation, she dealt with thnigs as a bluff and shes been trying to call my bluff...... unfortunately, never sleep on a problem ladies, it multiplies, i have had months to reflect on the issue and unfortunately the pmroblem has multiplied.... quite simply her resilience to call my phanthom bluff is now her downfall... i need my sanity back not kiddy games!

True NaijaBwoy: Na wa o

I always thought people who divorce must have been lazy in their marriage to keep things together.... but the sad fact is i am now going through a divorce. Its even more painfull to realise the key reason for me parting ways with the woman i still love is simply because she wont address the error of her ways.

Ironically, if she had said, "my husband, i am sorry please fogive me and lets patch things up (even for the sake of the kids)". I would with out doubt reconsider. it would help restore my confidence in her and my marriage.

The harsh reality is without these words, I would continously battle with her in respect of who wears the pants in our marriage. it truly doesnt help that her tenacity is supproted by her family. This truly chops my legs of me manhood and dignity... My marriage is currently the spin off from Eastenders... the family affairs is out there...

Im guessing you want to know what she should be sorry about it will pop out when i get enough feedback from the women out there.

9yrs knowing her, 5yrs married, 2kids later and a divorce............ Ladies, Learn these words, it goes a long way to retaining your marriage " my husband i am sorry"

True NaijaBwoy:

Im a poker player (not the gambling, addicted type!). and i know how hard to push a bluff. The general rules are, you fold if you have a bad hand or you loose big. In my real life situation, she dealt with thnigs as a bluff and shes been trying to call my bluff...... unfortunately, never sleep on a problem ladies, it multiplies, i have had months to reflect on the issue and unfortunately the pmroblem has multiplied.... quite simply her resilience to call my phanthom bluff is now her downfall... i need my sanity back not kiddy games!

True NaijaBwoy: Na wa o

I always thought people who divorce must have been lazy in their marriage to keep things together.... but the sad fact is i am now going through a divorce. Its even more painfull to realise the key reason for me parting ways with the woman i still love is simply because she wont address the error of her ways.

Ironically, if she had said, "my husband, i am sorry please fogive me and lets patch things up (even for the sake of the kids)". I would with out doubt reconsider. it would help restore my confidence in her and my marriage.

The harsh reality is without these words, I would continously battle with her in respect of who wears the pants in our marriage. it truly doesnt help that her tenacity is supproted by her family. This truly chops my legs of me manhood and dignity... My marriage is currently the spin off from Eastenders... the family affairs is out there...

Im guessing you want to know what she should be sorry about it will pop out when i get enough feedback from the women out there.

9yrs knowing her, 5yrs married, 2kids later and a divorce............ Ladies, Learn these words, it goes a long way to retaining your marriage " my husband i am sorry"

armyofone:

well maybe you haven't been really supportive and she was at her last lap?
I'm sorry isn't enough from one party, have you told her you are sorry?
I'm sorry baby we are at this phrase, don't you think we can work this out, I love you and I feel we can make it if we give it a try. I love you, I really love you etc Try harder and don't give up yet.

CAMEROONPRIDE: Don't mind them, women are the worst thing that happened to mankind, i curse the day God almost killed us to create una.Tufiakwa

carefreewannabe:

are you a homo or really that frustrated?
sorry but it kind of goes beyond laughing.
and if you choose to mention God, you better not insult him for what he has created.

good day to you.

armyofone:

well maybe you haven't been really supportive and she was at her last lap?
I'm sorry isn't enough from one party, have you told her you are sorry?
I'm sorry baby we are at this phrase, don't you think we can work this out, I love you and I feel we can make it if we give it a try. I love you, I really love you etc Try harder and don't give up yet.

jidegirl12: OP just cause 'I'm sorry' ?? ( or cause her family hold sway over you & your marriage and you can't defend yourself like a REAL MAN to ring what their boundary are in YOUR HOME?? )

Awawi you're yapping divorce when you already gave up your role!

How bout supposedly you're married to somebody that never ever admit they're wrong? I bet you'd move out after your first child ehn? You're tripping!

*Clears throat* enough with the generalization ko? Not all women are egocentric to their spouse.


I ll let you have your 5min of fame and agree there is always uncertainty about the next person! I ll extend your 5 min of fame and say the title of the thread should have been more specific than generalised....

But the reality is no one will truly know what they bargain for when they get married, we jump into with hope and expectations.

The 3rd party are not wholly the issue, the issue is how she(or any other woman) handles what shes told by them.... i only tend to find out months later in a heated "conversation" whats been said about me, naturally, this eats into her opinion of me and us.

Give up my role! dearest, this is not an easy decsion, simply, put she needs to understand that we cant continue the way things are,,, things will only get more physical!! abi, if u see either of us for paper in court for murder, will you now say good man he stuck through it till she killed him!!!!

ps.... This is years of perseverance and dialogue not a weekend bout of misunderstanding (something had to give!), im not tripping, just dont get it twisted!














OMFreakingGawd!! Lakers is DoNE!!

vanitty: Didn't you know the person you married before you signed the dotted lies?

You initiated the divorce and as it is now, been the person she is , she won't beg you.

You, mr man need to have done better at managing your home. The instant you started saying sorry for what wasn't your fault, you more or less started allowing resent ful feelings into your home

If you are hurting as much as you are, you better go for counselling with her, let a neutral third party mediate before you allow your pride to make your kids a statistic in the single parent ish!

debrief08: You used your family to play poker it exploded in your face now all women are to be blamed?
Oga Husband, when you are ready to get a solution you will say what exactly she has refused to apologise over.
For anyone to risk divorce over a simpke apology means its a serious life and death issue. For all her family to support her it means its more serious than normal.
Since you have decided to share, share it all and save us the half story and "why can't women say sorry" wahala.
When I was almost killed and left, my Ex told all who cared to listen that it was my Fathers interference that was breaking our home.

alutacontinua: Dt ur write-up sounds like you're writing an article, it doesn't really sound like you have a story that touched you.

I think you just want to have a 10-paged thread on nairaland...
*just my thoughts*